|
midwat posted:Look at that loving sentence. This man writes for a living. Where to start? What's the biggest nugget of corn in this poo poo sundae? Is it Scoop opening the article with a five-paragraph digression about a hypothetical restauranteur he made up? Is it how he mistakenly attributes a quote to Jerry Angelo, when it was actually Ted Phillips speaking months after Angelo's firing? Is it how, in the process of loving up that quotation, he suggests (incorrectly) that the Bears haven't made a new offer to Forte since before last season? No, the worst thing is the loving SENTENCES. Jesus, look at some of these abominations: "Stop holding out and accept the franchise tag, which will pay him $7.7 million this season (a significant upgrade from what he made last season, when he was paid $600,000), have the same season he had last season before he was injured then come back to the table and get the contract from the Bears that he was looking for when this whole thing began." - Either Scoop meant for this entire thing to be written in the imperative, or he forgot that most sentences tend to have a subject. Also, there are about fifteen clauses in this fucker, jammed together like passengers on the Tokyo subway, just screaming for a comma. "Games -- not all, but too many -- teams play in which they want the player to overproduce and when the player does they hold it against them in contract negotiations; ownership saying the "shelf life of a running back is short" as a new way of devaluing a player regardless of what he does and using it as leverage against the value of the player's pending contract." - It takes a special kind of writer to squash an entire paragraph into one sentence, then make that sentence a run-on and a fragment at the same time. How do you write a 66-word sentence without creating a single functioning independent clause? More importantly, who told Scoop Jackson what a semicolon was? Don't ruin semicolons for me, Scoop. "(If this is the new standard procedure of how NFL teams are going to monetarily access running backs, the entire structure of rookie contracts for players at that position needs to change.)" - Apparently this sentence is important, but also secret. That's the only explanation for why it gets to be its own paragraph, but the whole loving thing also has to be put in parentheses. Also, how the hell does one "monetarily access" a running back? What does that entail, exactly? I'm picturing Scoop trying in vain to swipe his ATM card through Ray Rice.
|
#
¿
Jun 7, 2012 17:09
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ May 3, 2024 04:01 |
|
|
I know, Evan Silva really needs to learn how to plagiarize posts off fan forums and hand them in as his columns. This industry has standards, god dammit. EDIT: Double points for a real journalist not knowing the difference between plural and possessive.
|
|
#
¿
Jun 19, 2012 14:43
|
|
|
DangerKat posted:This is just as bad. Even though he is a columnist and not a beat reporter, Sid Hartman of the Star Tribune in Minnesota blows so much sunshine about the sports teams here that any time he does try to report anything, no one puts any stock in it. He displays such little objectivity that it has destroyed his credibility. 1) keep beating the drum about how the Cover-2 is an awful defense that the Bears will never win with 2) insert a bunch of lovely puns 3) gripe about how Lovie doesn't look mad enough on the sidelines, or how Lovie's "delusional" because he won't trash his own players to the media 4) congratulate himself for predicting that every Bears team will suck, ignoring all the times that he was wrong and they had a good season. Seriously, he's the love child of a stopped clock and a broken record, but he gets to keep his cushy job because they can just trot him out every time the Bears lose a game. I swear, Lovie could win a Super Bowl and Rosenbloom would still find something to whine about.
|
|
#
¿
Jul 10, 2012 15:07
|
|
|
Crazy685 posted:If he's this to sports writing I'd love to know how he is as an attorney. If, as a lawyer running his own practice, he had enough spare time to run a 24-hour sports news aggregator out of his basement, I'm willing to bet he didn't have the most successful practice in the world.
|
|
#
¿
Jul 18, 2012 16:10
|
|
|
Brannock posted:There's no point to the story. There's no punchline, no follow-up, no anything. Nothing omitted. That's all there is. How long before Peter King's column is just his grocery list followed by a bunch of things he thought he was typing into the search bar?
|
|
#
¿
Oct 30, 2012 16:54
|
|