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I was surprised to find out we don't have an ongoing thread for The Onion here. I'm sure there are many good "stories" we've all missed seeing the first time around so I figured I'd start one up so we could all share our favorites. A few starters... "Supreme Court Rules Death Penalty Is 'Totally Badass'" http://www.theonion.com/video/supreme-court-rules-death-penalty-is-totally-badas,14244/ "New Six Flags Ride Based on Relationship with Deborah." http://www.theonion.com/articles/new-six-flags-ride-based-on-relationship-with-debo,17223/ "Uneducated Forklift Driver To Address Nation on Rush Limbaugh Radio Show" http://www.theonion.com/articles/may-29-1993,10561/ "Victim In Fatal Car Accident Tragically Not Glenn Beck" http://www.theonion.com/video/victim-in-fatal-car-accident-tragically-not-glenn,14380/ Also, can't start the thread without this classic, "Holy poo poo! Man Walks on loving Moon!" http://www.theonion.com/articles/july-21-1969,10515/
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Mar 14, 2012 19:56
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Abeya Minora posted:The best headline they ever did was "Black Man Asks Nation For Change" during the 2008 US Presidential Election cycle. Oh that one was great. Reminds me of this one. Southern Sheriff Pulls Over Obama Campaign Bus For Broken Taillight http://www.theonion.com/articles/southern-sheriff-pulls-over-obama-campaign-bus-for,2579/ Marion County deputy sheriff Dewey Clutter posted:"Now Barry, someone 'bout your height, 'bout your skin color knocked over a Piggly Wiggly up in New Hebron just a coupla hours ago," Clutter continued. "But you wouldn't know nothin' 'bout that, now would you?"
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Mar 15, 2012 01:22
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One of my favorites Hot New Relationship Book Warns Women: 'Wake Up! He's A Shapeshifter'
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Mar 20, 2012 15:10
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Farbtoner posted:I've gotten more real-world mileage out of Area Man Passionate Defender Of What He Imagines Constitution To Be than I care to admit. That one goes well with this one... I'm Not One Of Those 'Love Thy Neighbor' Christians
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Mar 30, 2012 16:50
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loving  Obama Launches More Realistic 'I Have Big Ideas But We'll See How It Goes' Campaign Slogan
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Apr 18, 2012 15:25
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Romney Spends Most Of Factory Visit Yelling At Employees To Work Harder http://www.theonion.com/articles/romney-spends-most-of-factory-visit-yelling-at-emp,28508/
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Jun 13, 2012 17:38
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Kevin Youkilis Takes Out Full-Page Ad In 'Juggs' To Thank All The Trim In Boston
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Jul 19, 2012 21:51
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Nation's Moms On Olympic Opening Ceremony: 'Buckle The gently caress Up, It's Going To Be A Wild-rear end Ride' http://www.theonion.com/articles/nations-moms-on-olympic-opening-ceremony-buckle-th,28962/
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Jul 27, 2012 20:29
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6th-Grade Teacher Seen Making Out With GameStop Dude
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Aug 20, 2012 20:33
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Just lost it at work reading this... Clint Eastwood To Publish New Autobiography: ‘I…Where You’re Alive And They—You Write A Book About You’ http://www.theonion.com/articles/cl...ote:cta-content
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Sep 5, 2012 19:37
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The Onion Endorses John Edwards For President http://www.theonion.com/articles/th...eadline:default
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Oct 19, 2012 19:41
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'Boy Meets World' Spin Off To Focus On Difficulties Of Raising Autistic Child I reposted this on my facebook and there has been so much tears about it.
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Nov 28, 2012 21:44
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'Right To Live Life In Complete, Stunned Horror,' Added To Constitution God drat Onion, god drat...
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Dec 15, 2012 19:08
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4 Copy Editors Killed In Ongoing AP Style, Chicago Manual Gang Violence http://www.theonion.com/articles/4-copy-editors-killed-in-ongoing-ap-style-chicago,30806/ As someone who goes with the Chicago Manual of Style, it should read "Four Copy Editors...". There will be blood for this.
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Jan 7, 2013 19:02
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That DICK! posted:In Headlines? I don't think so. Never mind, I'm an idiot who mixed up APA style with CMS. My brain is muddled. Here is an Onion political cartoon to make up for it. http://www.theonion.com/articles/final-checkpoint,30805/
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Jan 7, 2013 19:55
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Wayne LaPierre Goes On Harpooning Spree To Prove Some Sort Of Point
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Jan 18, 2013 19:12
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Nation Would Not Be Surprised At This Point If Chris Brown Allegedly Traveled Back In Time And Punched Anne Frank
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Jan 28, 2013 22:11
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Amused to Death posted:Look, I'm Just Going To Say It: I Collect Antique Nazi Memorabilia This one is awesome if only because while the right loves to compare Obama to the Hitler/The Nazi's over gun control, every gun show I've ever been too, there is always a shitload of Nazi antiques/memorabilia around and for sale. It's definitely  Also things like this, http://gawker.com/5659792/meet-the-tea-party-candidate-who-plays-nazi-on-weekends
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Feb 5, 2013 21:16
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Bus Transporting Carnival Cruise Passengers Crashes Into Sewage Treatment Plant
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Feb 15, 2013 22:23
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 http://www.theonion.com/articles/battle-axes,31432/
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Feb 25, 2013 20:54
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Shady New Wendy's Deal Offering Five Hamburgers For Free, No Questions Asked
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Mar 8, 2013 18:51
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Aramek posted:For content: Iowa Fashion Week Begins. The tears from this are too good. http://blogs.desmoinesregister.com/...?nclick_check=1 quote:Instead of relying solely on my own snark, I enlisted Iowa native Todd Snyder for expert reaction to “Iowa Fashion Week.”
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Mar 13, 2013 16:17
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Next Episode Of 'Girls' To Feature Lena Dunham making GBS threads Herself During Gyno Exam While Eating A Burrito EDIT: Also the thread is a year old today 
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Mar 14, 2013 16:44
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The Onion Once Again Condemns Actor Eric Bana For His Continued Silence On The Issue Of Gay Marriage
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Mar 28, 2013 21:53
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Next Week's School Shooting Victims Thank Senate For Failing To Pass Gun Bill
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Apr 17, 2013 23:26
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Not sure why I found this as funny as I did. Clean-Shaven, Tuxedoed James Holmes Charms Courtroom In Latest Appearance
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May 14, 2013 19:19
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Without Guns, How Am I Supposed To Defend Myself From My Family?
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Jul 23, 2013 18:07
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internet celebrity posted:Sometimes I'm blown away by how how far they're willing to push it. Was just coming here to post that.  Onionquote:“From the Structural Steel Melt on Tower 7–Grain bread to the Twin Chowers cold cut combo with Ground Zero–Carb vinaigrette on a Let’s Whole Wheat Roll, we’ve got something for everybody this Subtember 11.”
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Sep 6, 2013 21:01
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An old but classic story in light of recent events National Funk Congress Deadlocked On Get Up/Get Down Issue
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Oct 4, 2013 20:33
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Chipmunk’s Plan For Future Better Crafted Than That Of 8 Out Of 10 Americans
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Oct 10, 2013 19:44
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Parents Finally Cave And Buy 33-Year-Old Son PlayStation 1
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Nov 23, 2013 05:35
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Report: American Dream Now An Out-Of-Court Settlement
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Jan 17, 2014 20:33
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Echo Chamber posted:Watch How These Kids React To A Boombox Playing A Recording Of Their Parents Fighting That's how they posted it on twitter, and it's glorious as a result.
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Oct 13, 2014 21:42
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I Keep My Grandfather’s Mind Active By Calling Him Every Day And Telling Him World War II Never Happened So good.
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Dec 11, 2014 19:06
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Last Chance posted:‘Cosby’ Fans Rejoice! Here’s A Way To Enjoy ‘The Cosby Show’ Without Feeling Weird Holy poo poo this is good stuff
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Dec 18, 2014 20:28
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It’s Happening: Cheaperbythedozen-movie.com Is Putting Up A Paywall To Drive Revenue
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Mar 25, 2015 18:56
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Last Chance posted:That's not from The Onion. I think you have the wrong thread. Duffleblog is a pretty funny site and definitely something that was influenced by The Onion. It belongs here.
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Jun 22, 2015 15:09
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Supreme Court Legalizes Gay Marriage After Landmark 193,000,000-115,000,000 Decision Supreme Court Rules In Favor Of Most Buck-Wild Pride Parade Nation’s Ever Seen
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Jun 26, 2015 16:14
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Dr. Arbitrary posted:War On Christmas? Historically Black Churches In The South Keep Getting Burned Down Saw this earlier, 
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Dec 7, 2015 21:02
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‘I’d Like You To Post Long, Aggressive Rants On Social Media,’ Says Bernie Sanders In Supporter’s Interpretation Of Speech
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Jun 9, 2016 22:40
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