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Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

Fabricated posted:

Good job at starting on stuff you should've had done before you ever put your kickstarter up.

Most of the absolute dumbest kickstarters that sell real physical products have proofs or prototypes done BEFORE they ever open their kickstarter and they still fail at a pretty consistent rate

The guy making the deskbed has put more thought into his kickstarter than the OUYA people put into their debacle

by that metric statpedia put more effort into his kickstarter than OUYA

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Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

Large Hardon Collider posted:

http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/592285363/elements-custom-playing-cards-by-jackson-dolan

Please give me money, but first, some compelling reasons why I shouldn't be designing anything:

lol

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy
$200k raised for ~open source~ iphone keyboard game controller
http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1703567677/icontrolpad-2-the-open-source-controller

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

this is horrible.

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

graph posted:

Mr Dakan did add that zero developers, an obscure programming language and dwindling cash did not mean the game was entirely dead.

sounds like they're ready for a second round of kickstarter funding :smugdog:

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

Risks and challenges

= [ALL RIGHTS RESERVED]= What I and many people did not realize is that by launching our ideas on public funding sites, we risk losing them to hackers, pirates & copycats combing the pages. People in the USA are still considered the world's idea people, so we have become digital targets all across America as reported on CNN September 2012. It’s easier and cheaper to steal others work after they’ve spent years developing it. Most small businesses and people like me do not have high or mid-level security on our computers so its relatively easy compared to stealing from big businesses. Even the names are at risk. That’s my risk in going public. What if it were your ministry of 8 years and your passion? Please pray with us that HEAVEN does not fail during anti-crime, anti-violence, anti-bully month of October.

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy
iBeg has got to be some sort of performance art piece. this guy is begging the internet for money in order to create an iphone game about begging. the game literally encourages you to donate your real-world money to a virtual hobo through in-game purchases.

quote:

The game was conceived by Chris Worboys in January 2012. He felt moved to create a game on the issue of homelessness, having witnessed many representatives of Vancouver’s homeless population during his daily commute. Inspired to build a new experience for the mobile gamers of today, he developed an idea where players would be put in the shoes of someone down on their luck, so they could experience the struggles of life on the streets.

here's a screenshot of your character begging for money outside of an organization that exists to find people a job, with lines of people happily waiting their turn to give you their shiny nickels


are you a small business owner? great news! the $750 reward level lets you advertise your business in the game as a place where vagrants congregate to ask passers-by for spare change!

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

Aleksei Vasiliev posted:

us military has a minimum intelligence requirement, police have a maximum intelligence limit

wow, just wow

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy
someone could make a kickstarter for a micro-USB LED notification light for androids with a passthrough for charging. i guarantee it will get funded. android spergs love them some notification lights. even better, forget usb passthrough and plan on the device enabling ~wireless charging~ and data xfer somehow.

aim for $10 per device then say it was harder than you thought and run off with the cash

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

PleasingFungus posted:

this is true, assuming that the rod has infinite mass and length.

dude you need to learn some special relativity

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

ok that's fancier than what I thought you meant but basically theres no reason to think that a mathematical abstraction of infinite mass in general relativity yields something physically meaningful any more than a proof that 0=1 based on dividing both sides by zero is mathematically meaningful

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1L3o88GKew&t=138s

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy
welp, there's a kickstarter for porn and you'll never guess what you can fund to get doted up irl
also ~lol~
(:nsfw: obvs)

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy
my cholesterol is naturally low no matter how much poo poo i eat :smugdog:

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy
fun weight-loss fact: you can eat unlimited quantities of fiber one cereal and it will keep you feeling full and not count towards your calorie budget at all bc you poo poo it all out.

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

Sweevo posted:

remind me why right-wing retards hate the UN again

they think the UN is a world government with actual authority over something and you know how they feel about "big gov't"

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

ahmeni posted:

nobody smart enough to get elected gives an actual poo poo about religion other than pandering

michelle bachmann

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

Cold on a Cob posted:

are there companies you can hire where people donate to kickstarters to raise the profile and make it look more viable?

like you pay them cost of donation plus 2% or something

sorta like how buskers and homeless people seed their collection instrument case or cup or whatever

good idea, lets make such a company. we'll call it "kickstarter kickstarter". i'll make the kickstarter kickstarter kickstarter. we might need a few friends to be kickstarter kickstarter kickstarter kickstarters

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

chumpchous posted:

wow he's like not a shithead at all

he wanted someone to help build his website and he... offered to pay them :monocle:

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

Migishu posted:

You know what people like spending money on? The new "organic" fad. Ever wanted to drink something that was organic? Well, look no further than drinking some ORGANIC WATER :what:

wow those fuckers have the nerve to market this as more sustainable than regular bottled water because it "does not deplete the earth's natural water resources"

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

Diamond Water posted:

It was not enough to have one of the highest alkaline waters on the market. The partnership of the precious diamond enhanced water and the extensive filtration process makes Diamond Water unique.

clorox has been selling an even higher-alkaline beverage for years now, and the people who buy Diamond Water definitely need to start chugging some of that instead

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

i got to laugh at a friend's husband the other day who busted that one out on me


once we were done laughing right into his face he got explained to that vaccines and 1st line antibiotics are both things the government forces pharma corps to produce in minimum quantities because they wouldn't otherwise due to no profitability

he was so mad and just doubled down and ruined the rest of dinner

the gov't is behind vaccines you say? nice job you basically just convinced him that david dees was right

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy
that ubuntu phone thing is supposed to ship in 10 months and the most precise specs on cpu they can provide is "fastest multi-core cpu"

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

Fabricated posted:

Incidentally one of their writers got busted for child porn and thrown out of the company.

lol one of these guys?

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

quote:

Risks and challenges

Production delays, personnel injury, and hardware failure are the primary obstacles facing our team at Dimensional Key Studios. These can, however, be avoided with a clean and focused work environment, frequent soft-ware back-ups, and a strict time schedule.

someone's been playing too many reality death mazes

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy
Calvin Johnson is the main Protagonist.Calvin Johnson is a police geek who likes games, anime, and girls. He is the only hope can stop Professor Livers Dies.

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy
mods namechange to Professor Livers Dies and make this my avatar

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

daft punk railroad posted:

it's cool, they're gonna delete all of the backers' money after 24 hours

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy
there's one adventure game from my youth where there's an ordinary-looking slightly-open door in one of the rooms and if you LOOK at it, it says "the door is ajar". to solve one of the puzzles you need a receptacle of some kind and the solution is to TAKE the door and when you take it, it becomes a JAR in your inventory. i still can't decide if that was hilarious or infuriating

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

A Sloth posted:

Doesnt everyone want a Tail? A few years ago we began to create the most expressive, controllable, and playful Tail there could be..
http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1299398926/grow-your-own-tail?ref=recently_launched

As part of our experiments in interaction and play, we decided to create a Tail that we could wear on our journeys around town. We wanted an extra limb that could do all the naughty things you dream of, but don't dare. Having a Tail lets you express your cheeky side. It gives a voice to your emotions even when you're standing still.. And it looks fabulous out and about!


http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/08/12/ryan-havens-tannenholz-_n_3744006.html

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

huh. is that like a common pet allergy but, um, at a high dose and taken internally?

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

i like how this random nobody assumes he can get the full cast to agree to be interviewed plus secure the rights to the deleted scenes

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy
his idea is essentially that tribes get to write their own DNS

e.g. here is a simulation of what browsing with the YOSPOS tribe would be like:
http://www.google.com

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

Orbi posted:

OUR KICKSTARTER GOAL: Before a live audience, we will produce a critical Phase I proof-of-concept flight demonstration: Specifically, we will fly a modified commercial quadcopter off the deck of a custom-designed and assembled rover mock-up -- blow simulated martian dust from the rover's solar panels using the copter's downdraft -- record high-definition video and photos of the rover's surroundings to demonstrate local-terrain mapping potential -- return and dock with the rover's power system -- autonomously charge the copter's internal battery using the rover's solar panels -- then take off again.

its about time someone schooled the mars rover teams at NASA on the possibilities of long-range autonomous flight vehicles!

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

Heresiarch posted:

as far as autismprojects go, x-plane is pretty awesome

that's nothing, there'll be no stopping those autists once they get going on the x-train

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

this is a worse sin than schmorky's furry porn days

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

quote:

$50
Custom Full exposure.

Tell me how you would like to see Deloria and I will do my very very best to fulfill your fantasy: A customized centerfold, in addition to the digital package.
Estimated delivery: November 2013

1 out of 10000 claimed

for $50 we can get a custom calendar of deloria with cat ears getting hosed in the rear end by bubsy while she sucks off two dick-wolves. strong female role model.

Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy

Al! posted:

send us an iPhone and we will punch a circular hole in the middle so you can use it as a bottle opener

welp





Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy
also there's this limey who wants £20,000 to fund something routinely accomplished for far less by amateur softball teams across the nation (production of a white cotton T-shirt with a lovely logo)

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Dixie Cretin Seaman
Jan 22, 2008

all hat and one catte
Hot Rope Guy
i wonder how many bottles you need to open before your screen cracks

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