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I've written a satirical romance/action thriller novel that includes some over the top language and descriptions. The story requires a love scene at some point early on since the title references the relationship between the two main characters and based on the degree of detail/explicitness of the work as a whole, it seems an obvious copout to gloss over the physical aspect of their relationship entirely. I read some excerpts of "50 Shades" to get an idea of the degree of sexuality currently present in that type of literature. I'm wondering if the following is enough to throw a huge chunk of potential readers off and since the thread's conversation drifted in this direction... Marc pumped his turgid dick into her sopping baby box as it thwacked wetly again his scrotal area. Steph’s back arched and her nails dug into Marc’s shoulders when she pulled them tight together. When he lost himself and began to cry out Steph jammed a sock puppet frog into his mouth. By the time he finished a minute later both had green felt between their teeth. This occurs on the 14th page. It hasn't discouraged my beta readers to run away screaming, but is this way too far to go to stay consistent with the pulpy, lurid language I'm using for the rest of the work? Also this is probably the most over the top it gets, so it does set the tone in a way. E - Basically if the somethingawful forums think grossness has gone too far that's probably a good indicator I'm looking for Brock Broner fucked around with this message at 22:16 on Aug 29, 2012 |
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Aug 29, 2012 22:13
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The book follows these two characters as they fall in love, have their lives torn apart, then reunite to stop government assassins operating undercover as band members from detonating a bomb at a political rally, so the underlying themes are kinda darker. I wanted the language and short situations of the book to be absurdly comical to counterbalance the serious aspects of it. The first 13 pages are straightforward with heavy hints of things to come, but this is the first instance of literary insanity. There's a short synopsis posted in Romper Bilson's thread. I feel some concerns about writing muppet porn in an invader zim type narrative voice, but the goal is to make this the most enjoyable potentially serious read possible. I figured it's better to go all out and tone down later cause if you don't have a unique voice or perspective, then things start getting boring. Might as well have some fun with it and hope others do also. Thanks for the opinions, I'm sure some more will pop up. I was considering posting this for months and I guess stumbled into the perfect moment. I've been heavily lurking this section of the forums since October of last year and all the advice here has been invaluable in helping me stumble through completing my first effort, so THANK YOU all very much. To pay it back I'll make an effort to be more involved instead of just leeching knowledge.
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Aug 29, 2012 23:48
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Nah don't worry, I understand where you're coming from. I'd never written any extended fiction in years, left the romance part until the very end and was dreading getting the words down on paper so I'm completely happy with just the frog part.
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Aug 30, 2012 02:26
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I also dislike Marc with a C and Stephanie is an inside joke name for local friends, they served better than A and B for drafting purposes. - apologies to all Marc's out there Brock Broner fucked around with this message at 02:58 on Aug 30, 2012 |
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Aug 30, 2012 02:55
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This isn't a great novel to post in Overwined's thread since there's some significant plotting problems, but Octopussy and Martello, I share your love of hard boiled, gently caress the world detective fiction, and you should read "The Last Good Kiss" by James Crumley. The narrative voice is basically Chandler and Hammett on steroids for pages at a time. It's not super tightly plotted and I'm pretty sure some of the leads kinda die off into nothing (haven't read it in a while), but the voice alone is worth checking it out. Unfortunately I think it's probably the best of Crumley's works and basically seems like a tribute to Chandler's "The Long Goodbye." It is better. Also, if you haven't, read James Ellroy's Underworld USA Trilogy. I started on the final novel "Blood's A Rover" and worked from the beginning after that, but those are probably my favorite overall for hard boiled crazy detective poo poo novels. Out of place for recommendations, but I love that genre and it seems like you two might also.
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Sep 11, 2012 08:14
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Hey all, what was that short story publication requirement subscription website? Is that still a legitimate source? I haven't seen it mentioned in quite a while.
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Jun 4, 2016 07:02
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Thank you Dr. Kloctopussy and ravenkult! Duotrope was exactly what I was looking for, but The Grinder looks useful as well.
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Jun 4, 2016 19:10
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