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May 15, 2024 00:47
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- Tasty_Crayon
- Jul 29, 2006
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Same story, different version.
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"Not here! Right around the corner. I can hear kids playing! You should poop where they can see you poop-walking!"
You bring smiles to children. Dog bless you.
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Jan 1, 2013 07:21
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- Tasty_Crayon
- Jul 29, 2006
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Same story, different version.
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I kicked a dog today.
This lady comes and drops her St Bernard off for a simple bath, no frills (we do basic grooming on top of daycare/boarding/training/rescue/every loving thing) and beams like an idiot as she tells me 'Oh and she likes to 'hug' you while you're doing it, it's so cute, you'll see!'. I shrug, figure the dog will want to wrap a paw around my back or shove her nose under my arm like most big goofy moron dogs like to, and tell her no worries.
I get the dog into the tub mostly okay, after some initial balking, but then as soon as I turned the water on her, she screamed like a chihuahua and leaped into my arms. I am not kidding; all four paws came right at me and I fell hard on my back with a whining, scrabbling, shrieking 150lb dog trying to force her way onto my chest. The wind was knocked out of me and it took several moments to recover, during which I was legitimately terrified that I would suffocate because this idiot dog would not stop slamming me back down every time I sat up. Finally, absolutely at my wit's end and fearing that I would never be able to breathe again, I yelled 'NO YOU STUPID gently caress' and slam-kicked her in the chest with both feet. I'm not proud of it, but she cowered and whimpered and backed off, so I was able to get up. Somehow I managed to cowgirl up and finish the bath, though god knows how, and I gleefully informed the woman that her idiot dog nearly killed me by 'hugging' and that she was not welcome back for baths. The best part about it was charging her full price for a service that costs less than half that, because gently caress you, that is a St Bernard, do not let it loving hug you.
So there you go PI, I have become what you made me.
Oh I hope you reamed her out good. That is loving horrible.
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Jun 30, 2013 02:34
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- Tasty_Crayon
- Jul 29, 2006
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Same story, different version.
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I prefer "I don't have to listen to you! YOU'RE NOT MY REAL MOM!"
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Oct 31, 2013 02:12
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May 15, 2024 00:47
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- Tasty_Crayon
- Jul 29, 2006
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Same story, different version.
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I didn't do this. Tragedy follows:
I had just seen the vet on the weekend, and my baby was kind of quiet and shy on NYE (very out of character), and didn't even cry for dinner. I gave her her wet food, she didn't come to eat it, I put her in front of it, and she took a few steps away and lay down under the kitchen table.
I picked her up and gave her a cuddle, she purred and lay down next to me for a few pets, and I went out for the night. I came back Jan 1 at about 6pm and she was deceased in a pool of urine. I can't even handle right now.
I wish I could give you a hug right now. I am so sorry.
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Jan 8, 2014 06:42
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Nov 28, 2012 04:15
