Enhydra Lutris posted:

I have devised a Recipe for a Quintuple Cheese Miniature Pizza; it is easy to construct with Ingredients that are readily available from most Super Markets; it requires only a Microwave; a small Plate; a Knife; it is a Wholesome and Friendly Yellow Snack.

The Ingredients are as follows: One (1) Serve of Pita Bread (a Middle Eastern Bread that is flat and round; it is sold at my local Wool Worths Super Markets in packs of Six (6) for Four (4) Dollars and Sixty (60) Cents; this amounts to Seventy Seven (77) Cents per Serving; this is a Bargain); Forty (40) Grams of Cream Cheese Spread; Eighty (80) Grams of Special Filling (Note: I prefer Haloumi Cheese (A Cheese that Squeaks; I enjoy its Unique Texture; you may prefer such Fillings as Bocconcini; Smoked Salmon; Roasted Eggplant; Chick Peas; other; but do not choose a Filling with a very strong flavour; it will overwhelm the Cheese and create a Flavour Storm in your Mouth; it will be a Stressor; furthermore you should only select Fillings in Warm Colours [Yellow; Orange; Pink; etcetera] in order to complement the Cheese and avoid Disharmony); Eighty (80) Grams of Mozzarella Cheese (a Popular Italian Cheese with a stringy Texture); Sixty (60) Grams of Triple Brie Cheese (a Creamy Cheese that melts very well; Camembert can be substituted but is unsatisfactory for the most part); Forty (40) Grams of Gruyère Cheese (a Swiss Variety that melts exceptionally well). Do not adjust or modify this Formula; I have perfected it over many Years; it cannot be improved.

These Photographs show some of these Cheese Varieties; they are intended to act as a Visual Aid to assist you in Shopping; Super Markets are often large and confusing and it can be difficult to locate Products; you do not need to purchase these Exact Brands; Brands may differ in various Countries:











The Method is simple; build a neat Stack of Cheese atop the Pita Bread Base; first spread the Cream Cheese; place the Special Filling in the Centre of the Pita Bread Base; inundate with Mozzarella Cheese; ensure that no Mozzarella Cheese over laps the Edge of the Pita Bread Base (it will spread slightly while melting; it may drop onto the Microwave Plate); finely slice the Triple Brie Cheese and layer over the top; again be sure that the Triple Brie Cheese does not touch the Edge of the Pita Bread Base (it will spread significantly while melting); cover with Gruyère Cheese; again be sure that the Gruyère Cheese does not touch the Edge of the Pita Bread Base (it will spread significantly while melting). Place carefully in the Microwave; take care not to spill the Cheese; it will melt onto the Glass Plate inside the Microwave; it will cause Mess. Adjust the Microwave Power to "High"; set the Timer for One Minute and Thirty (30) Seconds; watch carefully to ensure that no Problems occur; wait for the Microwave Tone (a Sound similar to a chime or a bell; this signifies that the Meal is ready); remove the Quintuple Cheese Miniature Pizza; trim any scraps of Cheese that have melted over the Edges of the Pita Bread Base; eat the Quintuple Cheese Miniature Pizza with a Knife and Fork. It will take numerous Attempts to perfect this Technique; once perfected this is a foolproof Meal; and very rewarding. The Gruyère will melt in such a way that it overlaps the Cheese Tiers; this creates a look similar to an Iced Cake; as seen in this Diagram:





Reasons to partake in a Quintuple Cheese Miniature Pizza: this Recipe is delicious and harmonious in Flavours; each Pizza offers a range of Textures that are intriguing to the Tissues of the Mouth but are not Over Whelming even in Unison; each Pizza is a soothing Yellow Colour; each Pizza is the perfect size for a Meal and it is simple to construct discrete units when you are catering for an Entertainment Function with Friends and/or Loved Ones and it is guaranteed that each discrete unit will be of a Consistent Size and Shape due to the rigid quality control for leading Pita Brands. I hope that you enjoy the Quintuple Cheese Miniature Pizza and that it brings joy and delight to your next Social Occasion; G-d Bless.