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razz posted:But if they found stuff they didn't like, you could have appealed it and went before a judge to try and prove your trustworthiness or whatever? I think you can but I didn't have any problems so I am not positive of the process.
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Jul 28, 2013 18:05
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April posted:Over half a million dollars... it's mind-boggling to me that some of these people even apply for clearance. Surely, they have to know they are going to be denied. I like this one: http://www.dod.mil/dodgc/doha/industrial/12-09324.h1.pdf quote:Applicant owes over $488,000 on delinquent student loans
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Jul 28, 2013 18:06
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April posted:It's not so much that they could/should use it to pay medical bills, but there are so many related expenses. Like, if one or both of them has to miss work while he is undergoing treatment, they will have less income, but they will still need gas, groceries, and so on. It just seems like they are making the absolute worst decisions. "Hey, we are in dire financial straits and the main provider is facing a major health crisis, and our special needs child requires expensive schooling and our car is dying and our house is falling apart around us... whoa! we got some money! Let's take a vacation!" I have family-in-law who are in a similar situation. The husband had leukemia and the wife was the only one working. The medical bills were considerable even though they have decent health insurance. One of the husband's family members decides to throw a benefit for them, raising some money by selling items people donate and by selling food at high prices. They appear to raise quite a bit of money as the benefit was packed and people were buying lots of stuff. Not even 2 months later, the family (4 kids + husband and wife) take a vacation to an Oceanside resort. I felt a little ripped off having gone to the benefit and purchased some stuff only to see them use the money for a family vacation. The least they could have done, assuming they weren't hurting for money that badly, is to postpone the vacation a few more months so as not to look like everyone generously donated so they could vacation rather than pay medical bills.
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Jul 28, 2013 19:01
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Oh! That reminded me of another story. Tara's mother killed herself. To help pay for some bills/the funeral or whatever, Tara organized a show with a bunch of bands, on the night of another fundraiser for a local community website. Nobody went to that show, instead, opting to go to Tara's show. What did she spend the money on? A super ugly back tattoo, tickets to a Bryan Adams concert, and lots of lovely fast food.
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Jul 28, 2013 19:23
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My dad is pretty good with computers. Earlier this year, my uncle (mother's side) asked him for laptop recommendations for my cousin, who just started college. Usage is pretty typical college student: browsing the Internet, word processing, and maybe a few simple games on Facebook. So my dad gave them the specs for a pretty decent $500 laptop - something that would be light, sufficiently powerful and can last her for two, maybe three years. Apparently, this offended the poo poo out of my uncle, who thought that my dad was trying to say that my uncle's family was "too poor for something better" and that a laptop that costs "a mere $500" was way below his daughter. Instead, he went and bought a whopping $2,500 laptop. And get this: not only is it five times more expensive, it's also worse in specs than the one my dad recommended, and much heavier.  I'm just sorry for my cousin because she's the one who has to lug the piece of crap around everywhere.
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Jul 31, 2013 03:41
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Where do you even get a laptop that costs that much that isn't an apple? Alienware, if they still exist?
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Jul 31, 2013 05:23
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Harry posted:Where do you even get a laptop that costs that much that isn't an apple? Alienware, if they still exist? The real question is how would it ever have worse specs.
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Jul 31, 2013 05:33
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spwrozek posted:The real question is how would it ever have worse specs. Happens all the time at the local mom and pop shops, they buy the latest at wholesale prices, can't sell it quickly so just ends up just sitting in the window until someone as dumb as enraged_camel's uncle comes along and forks over the full RRP from 3 years ago for it. Rudager fucked around with this message at 05:45 on Jul 31, 2013 |
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Jul 31, 2013 05:42
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razz posted:I like this one: This one is even better. http://www.dod.mil/dodgc/doha/industrial/11-04936.h1.pdf quote:Between January and September 2006, Applicant incurred over $1.2 million in debt to provide a luxurious lifestyle for his wife. The 30 accounts alleged in the SOR, totaling $172,000, remain unresolved. Clearance is denied. CASE NO. 11-04936.h1 I bet the wife left him. Reading these, it sounds like a good idea to have all your finances in order before applying for clearance.
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Jul 31, 2013 15:15
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mpyro posted:I bet the wife left him. If you read the whole thing, she did. But they re-married. It's truly incredible. Most of that $1.2 million was incurred less than 6 months after meeting her (mostly from buying a $1 mil house with $500 down). Eventually, she divorced him. A few months later, he got a better paying job working overseas, then they remarried, and now he mails her $9,500 every month (which, of course, does not go to paying off any debts).
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Jul 31, 2013 16:29
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Zhentar posted:If you read the whole thing, she did. But they re-married. It's truly incredible. Most of that $1.2 million was incurred less than 6 months after meeting her (mostly from buying a $1 mil house with $500 down). quote:Applicant met his ex-wife in the fall of 2005. The two decided to marry shortly thereafter. In January 2006, Applicant, who was earning $70,000 annually, agreed to purchase a home for his wife-to-be. With only a $500 down payment, he purchased a $1,000,000 home, knowing he could not afford it. His fiancée, who earned between $120,000 and $240,000 annually as a loan officer, convinced Applicant they could afford the house together. Applicant’s fiancée was unable to qualify for the mortgage loan. Just before the wedding, Applicant bought her a $64,000 luxury sports utility vehicle (SUV). The couple married in a small ceremony on February 2006 and took a $28,000 honeymoon to Bora Bora. Applicant paid for the trip using a credit card. Soon after the wedding, Applicant’s wife lost her job. Applicant depleted his savings and retirement accounts to pay his financial obligations. Soon, he began using credit cards to pay the household bills.  Holy poo poo. Move over, zaurg; you've been outclassed.Edit: quote:Applicant filed for Chapter 7 bankruptcy protection in March 2006, claiming over $1,000,000 in secured debt and $119,000 in unsecured debt. The secured debt included the home Applicant purchased as well as three vehicles: his wife’s SUV, a Mercedes he had purchased for his mother, and a car that he co-signed for his wife’s daughter. Can you imagine the fireworks if r/MRA were to find this? 
FrozenVent fucked around with this message at 16:54 on Jul 31, 2013 |
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Jul 31, 2013 16:50
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razz posted:I like this one: Yikes. Medical school abroad. That'd do it. That, and failing the exam to get his license... That said, it's a bit painful to watch a friend of mine overspend on his girlfriend to impress her. He does this every time he gets a new girlfriend... Aerofallosov fucked around with this message at 09:56 on Aug 1, 2013 |
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Aug 1, 2013 09:32
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My mother is VERY highly placed in my countries prison service.. She earns a huge amount of money in her week to week wage and there seems to be a near endless supply of overtime available. She gets post tax more in a week than I see in a month (I work in mental health and am doing 6 day weeks). She lives by herself in a small "granny flat" and eats like a bird, no real living expenses, does not drink, gamble do drugs and owns one sensible car. Drowning in debt and has borrowed several thousand dollars off myself and my sister. She is so far underwater she borrowed money off me when I had newborn twins and was working a lovely retail job. I have absolutely no idea in hell where her money goes, I've looked in to it and discussed it with my siblings and my mothers second husband, we all have no clue. we are pretty sure she's going to be homeless in about a month after she's forced to retire as she BARLY makes rent each week.
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Aug 1, 2013 10:41
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Chupe Raho Aurat posted:I have absolutely no idea in hell where her money goes, I've looked in to it and discussed it with my siblings and my mothers second husband, we all have no clue. we are pretty sure she's going to be homeless in about a month after she's forced to retire as she BARLY makes rent each week. You sure she doesn't gamble? Online poker and you'd never know.
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Aug 1, 2013 12:41
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DwemerCog posted:You sure she doesn't gamble? Online poker and you'd never know. Yea it's got to be gambling, drugs, or something else illegal. Any chance she somehow got mixed up with the wrong inmates and is paying them off in secret? Or any chance she isn't making nearly as much money as you think? Nothing adds up from what you said except gambling, drugs, or something else illegal.
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Aug 1, 2013 15:56
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johnny sack posted:To contribute a story to make up for no story above. I recently bought a new water softener. I was telling my mom about it and why I bought a Fleck instead of some cheapie from Sears. She told me a terrible story how she and her husband had been renting a water softener since he bought the house in 1987. Something like $15/month, and that didn't include salt. 15 x 12 x 25 (years) = $4500 if my quick math hasn't failed me. For reference, if they had bought the very water softener AND had Culligan install it, it would have been like $275 back in the late 80s. I own a rental property. Rent-A-Center called and wanted confirmation that one of my new tenants was actually living there, and I confirmed it. Of course the tenant immediately stops paying rent the minute she moves in. I stop by to talk to her, and see the apartment is loaded with new stuff. A couch, television, laptop, etc. This apartment is her 2nd residence, two hours closer to work than her other home. She explains that she's now having trouble paying for all this Rent-A-Center stuff and the rent. She literally had to have all new stuff for her apartment, in the most expensive way possible. Used televisions are $100 on Craigslist. Couches are even cheaper. I hope she has fun making those payments when I give her the boot for nonpayment.
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Aug 1, 2013 16:38
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johnny sack posted:Yea it's got to be gambling, drugs, or something else illegal. There's also the possibility of heavily "investing" in helping out a Nigerian prince or something.
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Aug 1, 2013 18:10
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Chupe Raho Aurat posted:I have absolutely no idea in hell where her money goes, I've looked in to it and discussed it with my siblings and my mothers second husband, we all have no clue. Look into it and discuss it with your siblings harder, because I really need to know what this mysterious money sink is. It has to be gambling.
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Aug 1, 2013 19:53
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ZeroDays posted:Look into it and discuss it with your siblings harder, because I really need to know what this mysterious money sink is. It has to be gambling. My vote is secret yacht demolition derby 'matches' on the weekends that she doesn't tell anyone about.
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Aug 1, 2013 20:29
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canyoneer posted:Any windfall commission he got would be blown immediately on expensive clothes for his kids, even though he was butt-poor. I do. I've seen it twice. My ex used to live in destitute poverty, so any "excess" above what was needed for survival would frequently get stolen. She had this happen in both New York City and in Cuba. In NYC, in the ghetto her family lived in, apartments would get broken into all the time. She had to create a "gang" along with some other girls so that the bullies/gangs around them would not beat them up. Her family moved back to Cuba after Fidel took over (it took me 8 years to find the truth about why this happened) and if they had anything more than needed for survival, it was taken away "for the revolution." She became very obsessed with appearances and would spend money on the appearance of wealth just to avoid the painful memories of her younger years. An example of this was when she threw out all of my plastic cups. I used to have a collection from various restaurants and sports arenas. When she lived in the ghetto, the only thing that the burglars would leave behind would be plastic cups. Having plastic cups in the house, like being cheap/frugal, would trigger her PTSD symptoms. My brother had so many judgements against him that he literally could not keep a bank account open before someone would wave the judgement around and scoop up everything in his bank account. So his motivation was a combination of "use it or lose it" and "I've suffered for so long that I deserve to splurge." After reading the idiots thread in GIP, I got to see that he wasn't alone in his idiocy, and that there were other morons who hadn't been thrown out of the military (yet). I always wondered how you could get thrown out as "unfit for duty" because he wouldn't talk about it, but that thread, and Einstein's quote: Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former" help explain it. systran posted:Obviously it would be cool if there were another path where you could opt out of the "get a degree, get a job" fallacy and instead just start learning a practical skill late in high school. There is more or less no push for this; most students think they need to go get a degree no matter what it takes unless they want to work minimum wage forever. As a result of eliminating tracking, votech training got moved to community colleges. So if you want to be a car mechanic, or HVAC technician, you have to spend money at the local community college instead of just picking those classes in high school. The push away from tracking was helped along by the folks who claimed that the US was moving away from industry and into a "service economy" and a knowledge based economy. If that transition were correct - and I claim it is a cruel hoax - then the US would need lots of very smart people and no more assembly line workers and no more mechanics.
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Aug 1, 2013 21:34
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Huttan posted:They used to have this in schools up to the end of the 1970s. It was called "tracking". Essentially, high schools would have a college-bound track for smarter students and a vocational training track for the rest. Unfortunately, many schools pushed women and minorities into the votech track, and so tracking became to be seen as the modern version of "separate but equal". I'm not exactly sure it's comparable, but tracking still exists. At my high school, for example, there was a general math/science track, an engineering track, a mechanical one, and cosmetology where you graduated with a license. I believe cosmetology was the only one where you actually completed any other level of schooling while in high school though so you'd probably still have to pay for college/training courses for the others. The math/science and engineering and a few others (healthcare I think?) as well as the generalized "advanced studies" one I did heavily stressed dual credit, as in we all went to college classes too. For free. I got a year of college credit and I'm graduating after 3 years of undergrad next weekend. I should stress however that you get to "choose" your track, you're just heavily steered towards one more suited to your abilities. You do have to test to get into some of them which limits your choices also. So a lot of people who would've probably otherwise dropped out ended up in the mechanical and cosmetology thingies. It was actually a really really good opportunity for one of my friends because with her cosmetology license she was able to get a job right out of high school and save money to go to a four year university, which she is now doing. It was literally called tracking/tracks btw. Edit to add: This was in central Texas. Silly Hippie fucked around with this message at 23:28 on Aug 1, 2013 |
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Aug 1, 2013 23:24
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johnny sack posted:Yea it's got to be gambling, drugs, or something else illegal. Any chance she somehow got mixed up with the wrong inmates and is paying them off in secret? That's why its so drat confusing.. My family know a few other people in the same line as my mother and there is a definite huge rate of pay involved, all the others are doing very well for themselves (even the ones buying big rear end TV's and cars etc) I lived with my mother for two years not that long ago and unless she's smoking crack at work its not drugs, excepting work systems she is functionally computer illiterate (to the point of asking me why she could not access her Hotmail account from the Yahoo webpage) so I don't think she's helping out Prince Mufasar, She's never shown the slightest interest in any form of gambling from sports to bingo and there is no casino in her home town. Mom is a hard woman and any criminals that tried in on would be in for a short hard shock, a couple have learnt that the hard way, and these days she does not really spend any time of the "shop floor" anyway. We have had several informal family discussions and its just a plain mystery.
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Aug 2, 2013 03:14
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Chupe Raho Aurat posted:We have had several informal family discussions and its just a plain mystery. Well it's not really, money just doesn't disappear for no reason. Maybe it's more of a positive thing, like she's putting a lot away for retirement?
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Aug 2, 2013 03:44
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Chupe Raho Aurat posted:excepting work systems she is functionally computer illiterate (to the point of asking me why she could not access her Hotmail account from the Yahoo webpage) so I don't think she's helping out Prince Mufasar,
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Aug 2, 2013 03:48
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i like nice words
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Rudager posted:Well it's not really, money just doesn't disappear for no reason. I wish, she has roughly 60k in the bank*. She seems to think this is plenty but all I could think was "That's not even a years wages" *By the bank I mean her retirement fund Chupe Raho Aurat fucked around with this message at 04:29 on Aug 2, 2013 |
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Aug 2, 2013 03:50
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Huttan posted:They used to have this in schools up to the end of the 1970s. It was called "tracking". Essentially, high schools would have a college-bound track for smarter students and a vocational training track for the rest. Unfortunately, many schools pushed women and minorities into the votech track, and so tracking became to be seen as the modern version of "separate but equal". Some high schools still have tech programs. My old school district had a tech school for people who wanted to be mechanics, welders and even programs for getting people into fields like commercial art. Unfortunately the place had a (deserved) reputation for being a holding pen for the druggies, flunkies and troublemakers and as a result a lot of kids who were talented but not necessarily college-bound missed out on an opportunity to start down a skilled career path early on.
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Aug 2, 2013 04:13
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Chupe Raho Aurat posted:I wish, she has roughly 60k in the bank*. She seems to think this is plenty but all I could think was "That's not even a years wages" Any chance one of your siblings needs a little more "help" than you guys? That's the big reason that I could see large expenditures and secrecy without drugs/gambling - if she's essentially protecting one of your more careless siblings. Can you set her up with something like Mint and track it for her to see where the money is going? That way you'll know her actual salary and expenditures. I really can't imagine watching my mom go into financial ruin and just being like "Oh well, the money just keeps disappearing!" -- I know it's not your money but if she doesn't want you looking at it for her, there's probably a reason for it and she knows where the money is going.
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Aug 2, 2013 04:48
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I have brought it up a few times, but short of screaming I don't think im getting much information out of her. Don't get me wrong, its not like we are just watching and not concerned, but at the end of the day she is a grown up and we simply have no clue what's happening. I do have a younger brother living in the same area, but he is married with 3 kids and a "sensible" wife. Unless they have very hidden issues there's nothing wrong there either. I guess when she kicks the bucket we will get the entire story. At least we she has funeral insurance now, this is something she only got recently and only after my sister point blank brought up with her (after prompting from me) that we all have young children and are really going to struggle to cover a funerals costs.
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Aug 2, 2013 06:42
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Chupe Raho Aurat posted:
This could easily be it. I have an uncle who sucked down "loans" of tens of thousands of dollars from my grandfather. People didn't catch on for years. It wasn't like my uncle was a drug addict or anything. Just bad with money, young and newly married. Short of a money intervention, you're right - you won't know until she kicks the bucket or until her debts really catch up with her. The time to ask "what's going on?" is when she's asking for loans. Tell her that you'd be happy to lend her the money, but she needs to come clean.
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Aug 2, 2013 09:42
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Chupe Raho Aurat posted:I have brought it up a few times, but short of screaming I don't think im getting much information out of her. Don't get me wrong, its not like we are just watching and not concerned, but at the end of the day she is a grown up and we simply have no clue what's happening. Besides the funeral, are you planning on supporting her if she gets fired, retires, or can't work due to illness? If so you have some right to know where the money's going. Content: I have another consulting ex-coworker who has a highly paid job, married to an equally highly-paid professional. They bought a fancy home in the suburbs of Chicago, and then in 2008 or so decided to buy a posh home in the city too, because of course Chicago will be the site of the 2016 summer Olympics. Chicago lost the bid in 2009, right on the heels of the subprime mortgage crisis. They were living paycheck to paycheck with a combined salary of $200-$300k
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Aug 2, 2013 09:48
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tiananman posted:This could easily be it. I have an uncle who sucked down "loans" of tens of thousands of dollars from my grandfather. People didn't catch on for years. It wasn't like my uncle was a drug addict or anything. Just bad with money, young and newly married. It's funny you mention that, we discovered after my great grandmother died that mom had been borrowing money from her foor years, it turned out to be multiple thousands of dollars also. tiananman posted:The time to ask "what's going on?" is when she's asking for loans. Tell her that you'd be happy to lend her the money, but she needs to come clean. We have stopped loaning money, I think she realises the gig is up because she does not ask us anymore (I can speak for my siblings), however she has pulled a swifty on my wife by coming to visit, we live eight hours away, and then admitting she does not have the money to get home. Its hard to turn your mother down and she went through hell raising the three of us as a solo mother in the 80's so I tend to deposit any decent sums of cash I get into a term deposit account that I cant access on short notice. Tomfoolery posted:Besides the funeral, are you planning on supporting her if she gets fired, retires, or can't work due to illness? If so you have some right to know where the money's going. Oh yes, no ones going to let her starve, but its building a lot of resentment that someone on an enormous income is (was) constantly borrowing from her kids that are starting families and trying to get off the ground in a depressed economy. You have piles of cash and ZERO living costs.. you should be loving rolling in dough! Bonus story! I had $3000 in a secret bank account to keep it safe from her, the statements were going to my uncles house and he knew what I was up too.. then one day she hit him up for a loan and he turned her down.. and then told her I had the money. (The circumstances were so bad for her that if I said no she was out on the street, so what could I do once she knew I had the loot) Chupe Raho Aurat fucked around with this message at 11:39 on Aug 2, 2013 |
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Aug 2, 2013 11:36
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Chupe Raho Aurat posted:We have stopped loaning money, I think she realises the gig is up because she does not ask us anymore (I can speak for my siblings), however she has pulled a swifty on my wife by coming to visit, we live eight hours away, and then admitting she does not have the money to get home. Its hard to turn your mother down and she went through hell raising the three of us as a solo mother in the 80's so I tend to deposit any decent sums of cash I get into a term deposit account that I cant access on short notice. Yeah OK, you need a money intervention, cause she obviously has problems beyond being just plain bad with money.
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Aug 2, 2013 11:42
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Rudager posted:Yeah OK, you need a money intervention, cause she obviously has problems beyond being just plain bad with money. It sounds genetic, in his case. Part of being good with money is knowing when to say no. A financially-responsible parent with twins(!!) would know better than to take money away from his wife and kids, no matter how bad mom is doing. She's on her way to rock bottom... saying yes to her pleas is only delaying the inevitable. He is pissing away the cash that could have put his children through college.
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Aug 2, 2013 13:16
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martyrdumb posted:It sounds genetic, in his case. Part of being good with money is knowing when to say no. A financially-responsible parent with twins(!!) would know better than to take money away from his wife and kids, no matter how bad mom is doing. She's on her way to rock bottom... saying yes to her pleas is only delaying the inevitable. He is pissing away the cash that could have put his children through college. Don't be stupid. Did I suggest at any point it was causing unbearable hardships? Lets just stop the standard issue goon "I so clever" train right now huh? 'cause every thread goes the same way. (USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)
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Aug 2, 2013 13:28
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The_Franz posted:Some high schools still have tech programs. My old school district had a tech school for people who wanted to be mechanics, welders and even programs for getting people into fields like commercial art. Unfortunately the place had a (deserved) reputation for being a holding pen for the druggies, flunkies and troublemakers and as a result a lot of kids who were talented but not necessarily college-bound missed out on an opportunity to start down a skilled career path early on. Maybe it's only in my area, but vocational high schools are very common. I went to one, majored in Information Technology and went on to college. They offer a great deal of trades and disciplines. My mother, father and brother went for Medical Assisting, Steam Engineering, and Multimedia, respectively. It is looked down upon in some families as "the drop out school", which makes no sense, because if you don't make the mark in freshman year, they ship your rear end over to the public school, not vice-versa.
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Aug 2, 2013 14:34
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Chupe Raho Aurat posted:Don't be stupid. Did I suggest at any point it was causing unbearable hardships? You might say that you weren't "throwing away" the money, but yeah, you kind of did. Something is up with your mother's spending and it's affecting your entire family. You should do whatever you can to find out what is going on.
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Aug 2, 2013 14:54
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I don't even know what to say about chupes mother anymore. Obviously something totally hosed is going on there. Probably drugs. People can be very good at hiding drugs and the usage of drugs. Someone who works at a prison would probably be an expert on how to use drugs/use. You mentioned she was married, does the spouse know nothing of her habits, spending or otherwise? Is she buying brand new Prada purses every week? Fancy watches and or jewelry? Why not try to see a bank statement of hers?
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Aug 2, 2013 15:27
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At work, we are occasionally invited to free fine dining pkaces for lectures. Most of the girls I go with go out shopping for new clothes beforehand because "they don't have anything to wear". It's a free dinner, why are you paying $200 on new clothes? I knew a couple that got married and had a baby in college. They got WIC and over $600 a month in foodstamps. Most of their food would sit and rot in the fridge while they ate fast food. The kid was barely on solid food and would get her own kids' meals, even at sit down restaurants. They made up for the cost by never tipping.
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Aug 2, 2013 17:43
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Chupe Raho Aurat posted:Don't be stupid. Did I suggest at any point it was causing unbearable hardships? I think the problem is that it will inevitably become a financial hardship. You say you had to give your mother money so she wouldn't be out on the street? She's old enough to retire, and her job may force her to. What then? You'll feel obligated to help your mother out. Will you find out what her spending problem is then? Or do some damage control now, and push the issue the next time she asks for money? edit: Did we talk about broke lottery winners? I find it absolutely fascinating. Lottery Changed My Life - Most Eligible Bachelor - Leroy Fick (skip to 8:00 if you're impatient and want to see the son's investment plan) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fcg-BCbmYJ8 The followup: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jzD8RSoOC7E particle409 fucked around with this message at 19:24 on Aug 2, 2013 |
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Aug 2, 2013 19:12
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particle409 posted:I think the problem is that it will inevitably become a financial hardship. You say you had to give your mother money so she wouldn't be out on the street? She's old enough to retire, and her job may force her to. What then? You'll feel obligated to help your mother out. Will you find out what her spending problem is then? Or do some damage control now, and push the issue the next time she asks for money? We have already covered all your points in the last few posts. and yes! lottery losers are loving fascinating!! It boggles my mind that someone could experience an event that should secure them and their family futures forever and waste it all in a couple of years! How can you go from being Joe Normal who gets by day to day and suddenly become (almost overnight) the kind of guy that simply cannot live without four BMW's and an enormous house? If I won a million id simply pull my current wages (tax free) weekly and buy a good house.. What's so bad about that life?
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Aug 3, 2013 10:54
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