|
I've seen so many bad money moves since grad school, it boggles the mind that these are supposed to be the smart people. Particularly in my cohort, there were four couples who just had to keep up with each other and now all of them are pretty screwed financially... When I was starting out (early-mid 20s) everybody was excited about their loans being deferred, especially those who had been out of undergrad for a year or two. So it was spend, spend, spend that $22K/year! Every night after work they'd meet at the bar, either eat meals out or shop at Whole Foods, and spare no expense for pricey outdoor gear ("biologist chic" Patagonia, Marmot, etc.), bicycles (the kind that are expensive even used), latest mac laptop, etc. Next came the dogs--everyone has to have at least one. That really narrowed down the available places to live for the three couples who HAD to get two dogs, so they ended up buying houses (~$150K). By that point we only had three years left, and none of us was from that area of the country. Then all of them had babies, even though the grad student was the breadwinner in each case. Admittedly, I understand this more than needing a pack of dogs so badly you have to buy a house. We've all left the area for over a year and only one of them has sold their house, which sucks because all their loans are back on. Now that I'm a postdoc, I can see it happening again. The young grad student in my lab is constantly getting money from her parents to tide her over, obsessively checking her back account to make sure the latest deposit is available, but then blows it all on LuluLemon workout clothes and going out to bars. Two other grad students I know just bought a boat together ($6K each before it broke and needed $10K more of maintenance) even though they both only have 1-2 years left here and they aren't romantically involved or anything, just friends. I went to a postdoc social when I first got here, and when the topic of finances came up, I asked what people thought of the retirement accounts we have available to us (Fidelity 403(b) and 457(b)). No one had set one up because they're all in debt, don't know, or don't care, and that is the case for every other postdoc I've met since (we're mostly all over 30).
|
#
¿
Jul 2, 2013 03:02
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ May 4, 2024 10:11 |
|
|
Jastiger posted:I dunno, my parents own a timeshare through the Marriott system. They purchase a "home base" time share,which is worth a base amount of points, and accrue points whenever they stay at a Marriott. The points are transferable, so if they can't stay at their "home base" in say, Arizona, they can stay at any Marriott for free in the world. All because they purchased a Marriott timeshare. Now, I've seen terrible timeshares where you get to use it for like a week a year, then yeah..those are shady as hell. But I've had to change my opinion on the timeshares my parents picked up, it's super nice. When they visited us, we all just stayed in Seattle for free, next year they'll hit like Hawaii or something, and the following we'll hit "home base" with the whole family. My in-laws have had the same kind of Marriott timeshare for about 20 years, and they will be the first ones to tell you that it was a bad financial decision. They bought it when they'd been married for a little while and my father-in-law had just gotten a good job. The main problem is that you really have no idea where you're going to be financially or what your taste is in 20 years. They've done very well for themselves (retired early, heaps of money) and they want to vacation in places that don't have a Marriott resort. You have to make your plans up to years in advance for many destinations, and while the credits are good for a couple years, they do expire eventually. They've tried to give us vacations three times: once we couldn't afford the plane flights (grad students at the time), once nothing was available except like Branson, MO when we had vacation time, and once the reviews of the resort in Mexico where we wanted to go were pretty horrible. Basically after 20 years they can't give all their time away. They're trying to sell it now.
|
|
#
¿
Nov 12, 2013 11:43
|
|
|
canyoneer posted:There's a show on Netflix streaming called My First Home. Oh thank you for recommending this, I had a sick day yesterday and binge-watched maybe 6-7 of these. I think I've only seen one down payment break $10K. Most of the couples buying are not married. People are actually vetoing houses over bad paint colors and even because of a mirror hanging on the wall. It's like a series of case studies on how not to buy a house.
|
|
#
¿
Dec 11, 2013 22:18
|
|
|
canyoneer posted:Did you see the one of the three single siblings buying a house together? The older brother and sister both work as account managers at the same company, and their college student younger brother is going to live with them rent free. Yes, I just did! One thing that really surprises me about this show is that they give guests' full names and where they live. I just did a quick search on Facebook and it looks like the sister just got married--doubt she's living in that house now! The prodigal son little brother who had to have a gigantic house for his rent-free study pad didn't even end up going to medical school in the US. The older brother was right to act like he was going to get stuck with the place.
|
|
#
¿
Dec 12, 2013 03:10
|
|
|
Nail Rat posted:What the gently caress is there for an adult to do at Disneyland that's worth the crowd and costs? I have a cousin who lives in Anaheim and buys SoCal annual passes with parking to Disneyland and California Adventure every year with her husband (like $850 total annually). They like going on the rides, seeing the fireworks shows, parades, holiday decorations, and even just walking around. Once you buy the pass and you live 10 minutes away, it doesn't cost any more than walking around the park near your house if you don't buy anything, which they don't. Except: my cousin claims that she makes up the price of the passes every year by buying limited edition stuff that you can only buy at the park and selling it on eBay for a marked up price. It wouldn't be worth it to me, but it doesn't seem to be setting them back. Yes, they are kind of weird... And for a story: I think I already told one about grad students but here's another. Today at work, one of the grad students told me she broke her computer, phone, and glasses over winter break (long story but three different accidents). She replaced them all with top of the line Apple products/designer glasses. Her boyfriend tried to persuade her to get the computer/phone repaired, but instead she took out another credit card because "I won't have to deal with that anytime soon!" Also she has over $50K in student loans and won't begin repaying them until she's at least 29.
|
|
#
¿
Jan 9, 2014 03:03
|
|
|
overdesigned posted:The bad with money side to it is when both of you like to cook. My girlfriend and I fall into that category and things can get crazy because we like to go do extravagant home-cooking things that cost as much as, or more, than eating out for a meal. Also, kitchen gadgets can be expensive. This is pretty much what happens to us. We average about $50/month in restaurants (a nice meal every couple of months) but we spend $600/month in groceries for two people. A lot of the upcharge comes from buying local/ethically-raised meats, eggs, and dairy. We can afford it easily, want to support local farms, and think it tastes better. Our home-cooked meals can easily cost $7-10/serving, so yes many restaurants would be cheaper but the quality would be much worse. The gadgets do get expensive. No doubt this is bad with money! Cue 10 replies about how we should be buying a 20-pack of Foster Farms boneless chicken breasts from Costco and throwing it into a crockpot with whatever veggies happen to be to be going off in our fridge, some separated ketchup, a tablespoon of brown sugar, and 10 soy sauce packets we've stolen from Chinese restaurants.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 13, 2015 18:56
|
|
|
Gorman Thomas posted:I'll listen to Ramsey's radio show occasionally on my commute. Guy comes across as tone deaf on any subject that isn't personal finance 101. I stopped listening for a couple years but started up again because he's gotten more unhinged, which I find entertaining. He's got this thing going with the Bogleheads forum now where they'll post a thread that Ramsey's expected 12% annual rate of returns on mutual funds is ridiculous, and then a day or two later he'll go off on a rant about how the "financial goobers" of the internet think they know better than a multi-millionaire (him). Also he'll occasionally read financial articles aloud on the radio and completely misunderstand basic math, etc. For content: My nextdoor neighbor is really outgoing and the kind of person who gets to know everyone in the neighborhood. A few times now this older retired couple who lives a few buildings away from us has left her notes begging for money because they can't afford the payments on their new Mustang. Only problem is they seem to forget which apartment is hers about half the time and leave them inside our screen door instead. This morning I got a new one saying that they're still trying to pay off the Christmas gifts they got for their kids and grandkids, and can't make the car payment again this month. They'll take anything but $500 would "really save them right now." My neighbor says she's never given them a penny so I'm not sure why they keep asking. It's another example of family gifts taking precedence over monthly bills, not that they can afford the car in the first place.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 18, 2015 22:50
|
|
|
Haifisch posted:I've seen mattresses at the Costco I go to, but it's not set up to let you lay on them first. Do you have to ask an employee to help out, or was yours actually set up for it beforehand? The Costcos near us almost always have some mattresses in the back corner that would be difficult to set up because it would block an aisle. Then perhaps twice a year they get a big stock of mattresses in and do a special display in the center of the store, with one of each type set up (still in plastic) for testing. You can always ask a manager if a mattress display is coming up, or if there's a place in the store where you could test the mattresses they have. The mattresses also go on sale periodically (usually during the events, but also online which can cover shipping). We bought a ~$600 range inner spring Sealy mattress from Costco in 2008 and it's still in great condition, but we ended up moving it to a new guest room two years ago and ordering a ~$1000 inner spring firm Stearns & Foster from Costco for ourselves. We took the risk of ordering it online because of Costco's return policy and haven't been disappointed. One thing we also found out is that those multiple center support systems for morbidly obese people really prolong the life of a mattress (even for normal weight people). We inherited an antique bed that was very creaky and installed one of these systems to deal with the noise and satisfy the queen+ size mattress warranties. Not only is the bed really quiet now, but the mattress on it feels new after several years--no dips or depressions.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 20, 2015 20:33
|
|
|
moana posted:The place we went to today is not on the market yet. The owner is renting the house out to tenants and sleeping in a shack on the property. We saw his little shanty - his mattress was outside on a wood platform (dirt floor!) and he had a propane tank hooked up to a makeshift stove and a toilet in the floor you'd have to squat on. There are tons of little sheds everywhere and fencing stapled to the trees and oh my god. Not worth $525k, but the location is perfect and I imagine the neighbors would be happy to have us move in Is this in Southern California? We were thinking about upgrading to rending a house instead of an apartment, and three of the houses we looked at had "owner's shanties" in the back. Good with money, I guess?
|
|
#
¿
Feb 20, 2015 21:12
|
|
|
xie posted:People with legitimately wealthy parents (and not just "200k salary/210k expenses") don't really think about retirement and I can't really blame them. I can. Counting on an inheritance is bad with money. If my parents had relied on the multi-million dollar inheritance they should have gotten and hadn't saved for retirement, they would have nothing today. My in-laws are quite wealthy but there's no way we're going to count on getting a large part of it, even though that's how the will reads as of now. I've seen old people make really stupid financial moves, or just decide that they don't care about leaving an inheritance anymore and make it their mission to spend it all. Even if something is seriously affecting their mental state (in my grandmother's case, 20 years of alcoholism and depression), unless the person can be declared legally incompetent there's nothing any of the heirs can do to protect the money. And by protect it, I mean for the owner's continued necessary expenses, not for a future inheritance.
|
|
#
¿
Mar 3, 2015 21:19
|
|
|
Thesaurus posted:What would they be doing with their tens of millions of dollars? Giving it away to charity? Even for someone used to the finer things, it would be challenging to spend all of that down in your later years. It's not that challenging to hemorrhage money when you get old. I know he had much more than 8 figures, but it reminds me of how shocked people were that Michael Jackson could find a doctor to administer anesthesia to him every night. When you have millions of dollars people will always be around to part you from it. When my grandmother was in the ER for alcohol poisoning and urinary/kidney issues (because she never drank water) we would find bottles of scotch hidden in her hospital room. She paid people to bring it in. As long as she could operate a telephone or interact with someone outside the family (maids, doctors, caregivers, lawyers), she had no trouble hitting $50K/month.
|
|
#
¿
Mar 4, 2015 00:47
|
|
|
Thesaurus posted:Why do poor people have the most cars? I live in a neighborhood with a real mixture, some houses are $1M+ if they're beachfront or on the boat channels, other houses at $500K, and duplexes/apartments renting down to $1500/month. The very expensive houses always have 2 nice cars, usually luxury. The cheaper houses usually have 2 BFC-approved older imports with a few splurges here and there. The apartments (where we live) are almost all big newish trucks for the husbands and massive SUVs for the wives. Then many of our neighbors will have a third car for absolutely no reason (no additional drivers, not a fun or hobby car). The trucks especially are mind-boggling because most of these guys don't use them for work.
|
|
#
¿
Apr 16, 2015 16:30
|
|
|
Tea.EarlGrey.Hot. posted:I think it's because no one can start bragging about how they manage THEIR horses and start a fight over which methods are more fiscally responsible. Sooner or later someone will chime in with their cheap horse crock pot recipes and it will be ruined. 
|
|
#
¿
May 3, 2015 01:14
|
|
|
triplexpac posted:My friend once told me her mom makes her payments on her condo (my friend is 30). I have a friend who started a travel company geared toward a really narrow group of people--think on the order of "visit the world's famous historic grist mills for home flour enthusiasts" (not that, but obviously the real story would give it away). Her husband does nothing but lead tour groups, which as you can imagine aren't all that frequent. I always wondered how they afforded a condo in a nice part of LA, but eventually she told me that her parents own the building and let them have one of the condos for free. The parents live in one of the other condos and provide free childcare so the daughter can keep living the dream.
|
|
#
¿
Aug 4, 2015 22:06
|
|
|
BWM is my mom who pays for a women's haircut (even though it's short) plus dye job every 6 weeks for the last 30 years. Seriously I've never seen the woman's roots. It's around $100 a pop, so at least $25,000? for us all to think she's been a natural brunette this whole time.
|
|
#
¿
Oct 20, 2015 02:22
|
|
|
froglet posted:Cringing so hard right now, I've entered fuckin' bizarro land. I don't want a wedding but my parents do, so they've suggested some venues, told me to pick one and they'll pay and organise the rest except where my direct input is required (like a dress).i If someone's offering to throw you a free wedding and can't be convinced to give you the cash instead, you might as well enjoy a party with your friends and family. Not really BWM on your part and, assuming your parents can afford it, not really BWM for them either.
|
|
#
¿
May 14, 2016 23:27
|
|
|
Picking a side between husband who believes he is teaching his childlike wife to wear big girl panties vs. $600/year of big girl panties...
|
|
#
¿
May 17, 2016 00:32
|
|
|
pig slut lisa posted:IDK if this matters but I bet there are better, more respectful words to use than this Yes it does matter and thank you for saying something. Crap like that is the downside of reading financial forums as a woman. For BWM: Since I've had a kid and gotten to know other moms I've been invited to various local moms Facebook groups. One particularly active poster makes horrible financial decisions and has no trouble posting about it for all to see. In the few months I've been in the group she's complained about not being able to afford a full set of tires (needs them badly but can only get 2 for now), a new mattress, her rent, or her kids' birthday parties. Of course she somehow finds money to spend on Disneyland tickets, a whole bunch of kitchen gadgets on Amazon prime day, and all sorts of limited edition babywearing wraps. Yes, if you can put your baby in it, there is a limited edition version of it that costs hundreds of dollars. The biggest ripoffs are the wraps, which are literally just pieces of fabric. Here's an example of a fairly cheap one. The weirdest part is that you can resell a used wrap for more than retail if it's a popular enough print. Because who doesn't want a stretched out piece of fabric that's been saturated in someone else's sweat, drool, and milk?
|
|
#
¿
Aug 2, 2016 06:14
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ May 4, 2024 10:11 |
|
|
I was texting a group of my mom friends to ask if anyone had a Coverdell ESA and was satisfied with the brokerage firm (TD Ameritrade is driving me crazy). This is what I got:BWM Mom posted:We are not conventional. We just signed up for a cancer insurance plan. We are paying a rider on top of premiums, so that in 20 years, if neither of us gets cancer then we get all that money back. We considered it a win win. We are protected and get cash benefits to help pay for expenses if we get cancer, or we get a lump sum of cash back right when BWM Baby will be in college. This couple is in their early 30s and no family history of young people having cancer. They're both fairly successful professionals with employer-provided health insurance. BWM Dad even works in banking (of course). One of those cases where someone seems fairly competent and then 
|
|
#
¿
Apr 24, 2017 20:59
|
|