|
tuyop posted:How does it work with your goals? Like, do you want to retire early? How are you going to break that to her? That would actually be kind of nice. Don't do it passive-aggresssively like that though. But if you had been stashing a little bit more money away every month than your spouse thought, and they were all set to retire in, say 5 years and you sprung it on them that SURPRISE! We can actually retire RIGHT NOW! I think that would be a pretty cool surprise.
|
#
¿
Oct 24, 2013 03:17
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ May 3, 2024 08:32 |
|
|
I would have gladly showed my parents my college "report card" in exchange for them paying my student loans. In fact I showed them my grades every semester anyway because I was/am generally proud of my accomplishments in school and usually shared it with my parents. I paid my own tuition (and am still paying it off). But they aren't really the overbearing type to begin with and I'm pretty much an A-B student in general so yeah, I guess I would have traded that slight bit of inconvenience for decades of loan payments. They did give me a couple grand for school, maybe 10% of my total college expenditure, and I'm thankful for that. Now the fact that my mom told all her friends that they paid for my tuition in some sort of weird "Keeping Up With The Joneses" scenario since literally ALL of their friends paid for their kids' tuition so my mom felt she had to lie about it... that's another story haha  What I would do for my hypothetical kids is moot because my husband and I aren't having kids. What I like to think I would do is to set aside a small amount each month. Say, $100 for each kid, and they could use that for college when they were old enough if they wanted to go to college. I'm sure ~18 years from now, $20k isn't going to go that far but it would definitely put them leagues ahead of those students whose parents didn't help them out at all, with pretty much no sacrifice on my part (what's $100 a month, you know?). And if they decided to go to a state school and got a couple small scholarships who knows, they might hypothetically come out of college debt-free, especially if they had a part-time job while in college (like I did).
|
|
#
¿
Nov 4, 2013 22:47
|
|
|
Jeffrey posted:Did she ever do that in front of you? I would be pretty tempted to, in a friendly, non-combative manner, laugh and reveal the truth as if you thought she were kidding. Actually I found out when a couple of their friends were in town (I was already in grad school at the time, moved away and all that) and they offered to take me out to dinner. We were talking about my grad program and how I got a tuition waiver and one of them said something like "Well it sure is nice that you went through all this schooling with no debt!" and I was like, no actually I have $20,000 in debt from my undergrad degree. And he said that my mom had told them that she paid for my tuition and he was really, really shocked when I told him that did NOT happen. My parents didn't even co-sign on my loans, they weren't Parent PLUS loans, they are regular old Sallie May loans that are 100% under my name. I really think she just wanted to commiserate with her friends about it being SO HARD financially having a kid in college or whatever, even though me being in college cost them very little but their friends' kids' college cost them all a great deal. I kind of laughed it off at the time, I guess it does bother me a little bit but my mom is totally the "gotta have/do everything my friends have/do" type. I definitely would never bring it up. It's really bizarre but whatever makes her feel good. My parents are great people and I had everything I wanted growing up and beyond. I seriously grew up in this totally generic Midwestern middle-class nuclear family, parents never fought, my whole family is great, all that jazz. Like, my mom is just the nicest person that would do anything for me. I think she just went a little crazy for a while with money or something. Her and my dad are and always have been good with money, they buy a lot of useless crap but they save a lot too. What's funny is I think my mom does feel guilty about it (she also took money from me in other ways, by claiming me as a dependent for too long and she did it to my little bro too and we had a slight falling out a few years ago) but now she and my dad like, go out of their way to help me and my husband out with money. I think my parents have given me more money in the last 3 years than they have in my whole life combined. My mom paid off my car a while back for my birthday which was like $1500, paid for my wedding (was cheap, but still), and last month gave us $1,000 to fix our broken truck. They take us out to eat, my mom secretly puts gas in my car when we visit, she always has a new shirt or dress that she found on sale for me, that sort of stuff. So you know. I'm not complaining. And I definitely don't ever want to talk poo poo on my mom. She made mistakes as a parent as they all do. I think she's more than made up for being a doofus 5 years ago. But no I would never bring it up to her, haha. She would be mortified if she knew I found out she lied! Now I feel bad for talking crap on my mom. I love my mom. She did pay for my textbooks though! razz fucked around with this message at 00:13 on Nov 5, 2013 |
|
#
¿
Nov 5, 2013 00:05
|
|
|
Absolutely. And besides, I've never expected my parents to give me money, not even for college. I learned good money handling skills early on. I've had at least a part-time job since I was 14 in order to buy whatever useless crap kids want to buy in high school and somehow managed to save up over $6,000 of my own money by the time I moved away for school. So yeah any money I get from my parents is like an unexpected bonus! They've also given me a car and a truck for free and matched my down payment when I bought my next car so there you go. They've definitely supported me in other ways besides paying my college tuition. They're good people, we're good friends.
|
|
#
¿
Nov 5, 2013 01:50
|
|
|
SpelledBackwards posted:And make sure you don't have any optional services like overdraft protection which would autodraft from your savings to fund a large debit/check transaction intended to clear you out. I guess ideally it would be best to maintain that savings account in a separate bank or credit union where you don't even have a checking account, but I probably wouldn't go through the hassle. That's not how my overdraft protection works. It doesn't siphon it from my savings account. It just won't let the transaction run through. It only happened to me once when I was spending a couple hundred bucks at the store. My card wouldn't run. It would not accept it no matter what I did, It got declined repeatedly. I called my bank to ask what was up and I guess I either enrolled in the overdraft protection or was automatically enrolled because I don't remember even knowing about it. Anyway I just transferred some money from my savings to my checking over the phone and was able to make the purchase. But no, it did not automatically take it from my savings (which is with the same bank).
|
|
#
¿
Nov 6, 2013 21:42
|
|
|
Harry posted:Capital One and Chase (I'm assuming all major banks as well) has the option for the money to come out of your savings account automatically instead of being declined/overdrafted. It's title is something similar to overdraft protection. That seems like it would be a better system for me, I'll have to ask about it. I always have money in my savings account but sometimes I cut it a little close with the checking account. It's how I save money on my practically-minimum-wage salary. Throw a bunch in my savings account when I get paid and live off what I leave myself in my checking account. That begs a different question - is financial independence possible for people who aren't big earners and probably never will be? My husband is basically an unskilled laborer and I went down a career path that's historically pretty low paying. I'd be pretty thrilled if sometime in the next 5 years we were making 40 or 45K a year combined. Even if we stay in our low cost-of-living area, that's not really what I consider a lot of money for two people. We're hella frugal and are currently living on half that, but it's only possible because we aren't paying rent/utilities right now, and obviously we don't have much in the way of savings. Plus I lose my job at the end of the year (I'm graduating, I get a monthly stipend from the grad school). Now I know it's not likely that my husband and I will be minimum wage earners our entire life. But I worry sometimes that I'll be working until I'm 70. We don't want kids so that will help and have no desire to purchase a house. It's just a little scary, I'll be 28 when I finish school. I've never had a "real" job, never had a 401K or ANY employer benefits. Those phrases are alien to me. My husband went through a divorce before we met that pretty much wiped him out and since then he's basically been a ranch hand, obviously there's no pension or employer savings matching with a job like that. The accountant for the ranch actually said that no one that works on the ranch should be making more than $10 an hour because it's "too much for the type of work they do". Seriously lady, you sit in a cushy chair while they're cutting down trees and fixing barbed-wire fences! That's the small-town mentality - we're all poor so deal with being poor, be happy you even have a job. It sucks because I love my career (wildlife biologist) and he loves working on the ranch. Anyway that's a little E/N, I'm just rambling at the moment.
|
|
#
¿
Nov 6, 2013 22:50
|
|
|
Chadzok posted:A couple of thoughts here: Yeah we really don't mind living frugally. It's just in our nature. We just... don't really buy stuff. Aren't into gadgets. And most of our hobbies are stuff like fishing, hiking etc, and our friends are the same. Luckily we also have cheap friends:) I actually do have a little bit of a side business but I really spent most of the last couple years getting my feelers out and trying to see what people would buy. I did make about $800 last year. I know I could make more money with almost zero additional investment. Not like "retire from my day job" more, but maybe a couple grand a year. Right now it's a time thing - grad school is a time sink. Thanks for giving me some hope and insights. Not like I'm hopeless but you know. When the people you graduated with are all making 45-60K and my husband and I don't even make that combined, and you read how easy it is to retire early... it's not easy for everyone. And yes we currently do live on about 25-28K a year but like I mentioned, we live rent free. So obviously that saves us a considerable amount.
|
|
#
¿
Nov 7, 2013 04:24
|
|
|
I'm a wildlife biologist and the sequester has SERIOUSLY hurt the department of the interior, and therefore a huge percentage of state and federal wildlife jobs have been totally eliminated. It's the same story I get every time I apply - they're getting people with PhDs and 10+ years experience applying for entry-level positions. I'm applying for 28K a year state jobs and they're being snapped up by real professionals with PhDs, it's so sad. It makes me sad that all the funding got cut for wildlife because it's so important and it's my passion. They've reduced a lot of jobs to 6-month contract jobs so they don't have to pay benefits. I could go on about the state of jobs in my field but I won't; suffice to say it's a little bleak and I'm not highly optimistic, having been in this field since 2006 it's only gotten worse. I'm actually considering going back to school to get another Master's degree in Geography. I applied for an entry-level biologist job last week and didn't even get an interview so I emailed the guy and asked if he could give me any comments or critiques on my resume and how I could improve my application. He straight out told me that they're getting an insane amount of applications for entry level positions and my only weakness is due to the sequester and the fact that I'm going up against state and federal employees who are desperate to get a job, any job. There's also the fact that I'm female. You think it wouldn't matter in 2013 but I have been on interviews and nailed all the questions, had all the qualifications, impressed everyone and got nothing but positive comments, and they give the job to a guy who just got his Bachelor's a month ago who has never even had a job in the field. This is not an excuse - this is a real problem in this field and any professional will begrudgingly admit it to you - a lot of people do not and will never welcome women into a "man's job", and they will choose not to hire you simply for that reason and there's nothing I can do about it. I've been told that straight to my face. Anyway sorry for making this a pity party about me. I've always been the go-to sounding board for the wildlife undergrads needing job advice and felt really good about being able to help people; there's no one to give me advice. razz fucked around with this message at 18:05 on Nov 7, 2013 |
|
#
¿
Nov 7, 2013 17:55
|
|
|
spwrozek posted:Razz, go to the private sector if you want to make money. Also move west where everything is on public land and needs impact reviews. We basically have HDR on speed dial for all or work (EA, NEPA, field monitors and such). I would love to move. My husband and I are willing and ready to move anywhere, particularly out West. I compulsively apply to jobs in New Mexico. It would suck to leave the ranch but it can't support us both much longer. I'm not sure how I feel about jobs like you mentioned. Although I'm getting to the point where I can't be picky I suppose. A wildlife friend of mine makes almost 70K a year doing environmental impact stuff for a water treatment plant and she says it kills her soul, watching all the chemicals go into the environment and knowing it's all 100% legal. You test it and say "yep it's contaminated, but it's not too contaminated, send it out into the river". She hates it and says it is making her depressed, she was happier being a field tech making $8 an hour. It would do the same to me; thinking your helping the planet but in reality you're just getting an up-close and personal view of how bad things really are. Am I too pessimistic? I went into this field because of my never ending love for nature. I'm not sure if I could handle watching it legally be destroyed. I am looking heavily into the private sector. I would love to work for a nonprofit, I would love to work for a small company. Those jobs get just as many applications. Two weeks ago I applied for a 27K a year job for Pheasants Forever, a non-profit local conservation group, in the state where I live, doing literally what I got my masters degree to do (assessing impacts on grassland birds from different conservation standpoints). Didn't even get an interview. 27K a year! That's like 12 bucks an hour. And people are FIGHTING over that. Anyway I really don't want to use this thread as a sounding board/job market pity party so I'll leave it at that. razz fucked around with this message at 18:33 on Nov 7, 2013 |
|
#
¿
Nov 7, 2013 18:31
|
|
|
I wander around the prairie and look at birds . Birds are my life. I have done things that most people will never get a chance to do. I've held the wild things in my hands. The thought of giving that up to go test some company's sewage output keeps me up at night. EDIT: Nah, I'm done with the E/N. Maybe I'll just go live in a yurt
razz fucked around with this message at 18:46 on Nov 7, 2013 |
|
#
¿
Nov 7, 2013 18:42
|
|
|
TLG James posted:On the other hand, if you do a job you love, you may not care if you work it your entire life. That's more my style. That's another reason the job market's bad - people don't retire!
|
|
#
¿
Nov 7, 2013 19:20
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ May 3, 2024 08:32 |
|
|
I think financial independence simply means that you don't have to work for a living because you have enough money that you don't need to. Hence "financial independence". Your life is independent from your financial situation. You can work while being financially independent. It's not called "job independence".
|
|
#
¿
Jan 23, 2014 21:36
|
|