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I REMEMBER THE FIRST TIME I SAID ROLL COAL INTO A MIRROR AND NUTCUP APPEARED. IT FEELS LIKE IT WAS ALMOST YESTERDAY, IV8 AND I WERE HAVING A SLEEPOVER IN THE TRUCK STOP ALONG I95 IN PHILLY. IV8 WAS WEARING JEANS AND A TSHIRT THAT SMELLED OF DIESEL AND HAD CURSIVE WRITING THAT SAID "ASK ME ABOUT PUTTING MY RANGE SELECTOR INTO 'gently caress'". HE PULLED OUT A SUNSHADE VISOR WITH A VANITY MIRROR AND SAID LETS PLAY A GAME IVE HEARD OF, ITS CALLED "CHAPLESS NUTCUP". IT WILL TELL YOU THE NEXT TRUCK YOU WILL DRIVE. I DONT BELIEVE IN GHOSTS OR FHE SUPERNATURAL SO I SAID IT WAS BULLSHIT AND THATS DUMB, THEN IV8 ASKED ME WHAT I WAS SCARED OF. IM NOT AFRAID OF ANYTHING SO I TOOK THE MIRROR AND GAZED INTO. IN THE DISTANCE THERE WAS A SOUND OF THUNDER. "ROLL COAL" I SAID, BRANCHES OMINOUSLY BANGED ON THE WINDOWS OR MAYBE IT WAS A GUY LOOKING FOR AN OPEN SHITTER, ANYWAYS, "ROLL COAL" I BRAZENLY SAID A SECOND TIME AND THE WIND PICKED UP AND BLEW OUT ALL THE CANDLES SO IV8 YELLED AT THE loving rear end in a top hat DRYING HIS HANDS TO KNOCK IT THE gently caress OFF. "ROLL COAL" I SAID THE THIRD TIME AND THE BATHROOM LIGHTS WENT OFF AND AN OTHERWORLDLY GLOW CAME FROM THE VISOR BECAUSE OT HAD ONE OF THOSE BATTERY OPERATED LIGHTS ON IT WHICH IS PRETTY NIFTY IF YOU ASK ME. THEN HE APPEARED IN THE MIRROR, ALTHOUGH IT WASNT LIKE HIS FACE IT STARTED WITH THE BACK OF HIS HEAD AND ROTATED AROUND AND KEPT REALLY CLOSE FOCUS AND WENT UP AND DOWN MAKING SURE TO PAUSE ON HIS SICK ABS IT WAS LIKE THAT D'ANGELO VIDEO ACTUALLY EXCEPT NUTCUP KEEPS HIS DREADS IN HIS PANTS, THEY POKE OUT AROUND THE CHAPS ANYWAYS I BECAME A BELIEVER THAT DAY AND SAW THE MOST HORRIFYING TALE OF MY FUTURE. AS THE CAMERA SLOWLY PANNED DOWN TO HIS BARE rear end AT FIRST I NOTICED A LITTLE DESIGNER TAG ON HIS CHAPS AND THOUGHT "WHOA THATS COOL I COULD GO FOR SOME OF THOSE" BUT WHEN I LOOKED CLOSER I SAW IT, THE PROPHECY. IT SAID SWIFT.
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Oct 8, 2013 18:41
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| # ¿ May 11, 2024 19:56 |
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The rear end Stooge posted:I have a friend who is writing a novella about a gay trucker and she needs some info straight from the horse's mouth, as it were. Do any of you have stories about illicit drug use or furtive unprotected sex on the road? Perhaps a stolen moment in a fellow trucker's sleeper cab, the loneliness of the trucker lifestyle finally becoming too much to bear, both of you desperate for the touch of another's skin. I couldn't believe that things were getting blown this hard on a barren highway in Tennessee. I was deadheading Nutcup while taking a load. His rig had taken it up the rear end from a tiny little Italian car but somehow despite the size it had managed to mangle his fifth wheel pretty hard meaning he was out of commission until he got into something new. It was nice to have someone else in the cab with me on the long haul drives, it gets kind of lonely, only having the big whip antenna connecting you and the yammering jaw of another anonymous roadie as you pass in the night trying to fulfill your basic human needs for hours at a time. But not now, now I had a yammering jaw in my cab and I made sure it was working overtime. We talked about everything under the sun that we could think of; sports, politics, working out, accessorizing our assless chaps, QUALCOMM issues, religion, schools, Obama, and most importantly, the best making GBS threads spots along I95. I may have gotten a bit distracted from driving as he had a mouthful on some point and his coupe de grace on the entire thing left me a bit distracted from the road and I may have hit a bit of debris. Thinking it would be ok I was completely wrong, the big thick wheel in my hand started shaking and I had to grab it real hard and wrangle it to keep it under control. I started having to jerk it harder and harder until nutcup looked over and said "It feels like something is about to blow". I agreed and not wanting this trip to be completely finished, I brought everything to a stop to rest and see if we could continue or just finish right there. I disembarked the cab and wondered if maybe the nuts hadn't been looked at thoroughly, causing an imbalance, but a whistle from Nutcups side and a shout of "Come check out the size of this bulge" let me know what was up immediately. As I crossed over to his side I saw him standing there and a 6" long and probably 10" in diameter bulge poking out from the sidewall. His beater bar was in his hand but it was limply held in his hand, we both knew that there was no way to handle the tire failure without some roadside assistance. We thought of maybe limping it along slowly to a nearby service station but that tire looked ready to blow and the lightest breeze could have set it off. So nothing really gay happened but that will probably give you an idea of how much you yearn for more than two minutes of human contact at a rest station where you're just hoping that shithole who parked his truck at a pump and when inside to take a half hour dump gets back at some point.
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Oct 25, 2013 06:57
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