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baquerd posted:...and that's how I got chlamydia, I wasn't fooling around with anyone else I swear! Yep, vagina infected laptop did it, really! A ticket came in: From STD to CTD
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Aug 14, 2013 15:48
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They should probably change the placement of the MFP. Or making it more difficult to slam open the door.
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Aug 21, 2013 12:30
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The guy heer cann't stop mispeling simpel words which are corected by spellhcek. He is a manager.
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Aug 29, 2013 11:57
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nitrogen posted:We promoted a support monkey to be a mysql DBA. So you call him a monkey?
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Aug 30, 2013 16:54
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Our signatures are added automatically when sent externally because of local legal requirements. It sucks.
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Sep 10, 2013 14:29
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Agrikk posted:Take a picture of that server and complain to HP's Customer Support. Feedback from customers is the only way things will impro-oh gently caress it. Who am I kidding? Skip Customer Support, go straight to Account Manager.
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Oct 4, 2013 21:19
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I'd just like to remind people of the HP Engineer loving around with a metal screwdriver in a CPU slot to remove the thermal paste. Yep, he broke it (more).
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Oct 4, 2013 21:32
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I've seen a few TPM modules fail (T410). But that's like... 5 modules out of thousands of laptops.
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Nov 19, 2013 22:26
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Vin BioEthanol posted:What kind of fan and dock connector failure rate you have on t410s? I only have about 50 of those, about 150 400s and 150 420s but I've probably called in close to every 410 for fan and dock connector.
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Nov 20, 2013 10:27
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We're moving to HP Elitebooks and had to replace the fans for all of them, because of shoddy cabling the fans were either alwasy blowing, or never blowing. That's thousands of laptops they had to fix in a few weeks.
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Nov 20, 2013 12:25
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20C is pretty warm. 19C is my limit.
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Dec 2, 2013 10:46
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Well, GOogle Public DNS uses anycast and you're automagically redirected to the nearest location. I'm in the Netherlands and I'm getting 10-15ms, which is physically impossible if the servers were located in the US.
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Dec 4, 2013 13:31
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We're just in the alcohol part of the thread cycle, soon we're back to bitching about printers or something.
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Dec 4, 2013 20:13
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nexxai posted:That is the laziest, un-true "denial" that I've ever heard. Just because a particular application hasn't been certified "PCI compliant" doesn't mean that it can't work in a PCI environment. You just need to be able to show an auditor that you've taken the necessary steps to mitigate any potential non-compliant functions. Denied, PCI
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Dec 9, 2013 19:13
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Visited our offsite backup location. Looked great, until I was about to leave and looked at the ceiling. Can you guess what caught my eye? Sprinkler system.
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Dec 17, 2013 18:54
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papa_november posted:I'd have zero tolerance for that bullshit. Worries over wi-fi and cellphone radiation are simply newer additions to a longer list of such boogiemen as flouridation and chemtrails. That poo poo really clogs up the drains, man.
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Dec 18, 2013 07:53
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Entropic posted:I remember this guy's previous system because he had a video card that wouldn't quite fit in the case so he used a dremel or something to cut off bits of its plastic casing until it fit. 
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Dec 23, 2013 16:52
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If someone wants to look at porn, they're gonna look at porn.
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Dec 24, 2013 10:03
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rolleyes posted:Our standard technique was to create hyperlinks to whatever we wanted to run in Word. The modern version is using a VB script to bypass Applocker with Word.
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Jan 8, 2014 23:59
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Setting your locale to English also solves Microsoft's websites all being automatically translated to Dutch. Joy! There's also a Dutch thread in SAL, btw. Join us! I posted a job in there, you too could achieve the Year of the Job 2014.
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Jan 22, 2014 16:26
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GreenNight posted:Oh right ESX. Have any of you use Jabber? We're trying to decide between Jabber and Lync. We get both with our licensing. Then you might as well go for Lync.
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Feb 2, 2014 15:53
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"Dr. Evil. I didn't spend 6 years in evil medical school to be called mister, thank you very much."
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Feb 8, 2014 19:36
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Had to rename a user to 'elopes' after she got married. We had a good laugh about that one.
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Feb 8, 2014 23:32
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rolleyes posted:Well if you can get control of the box then you can route your pyramid scheme / lottery / whatever scam calls through it. Kind of like compromising an email server to send spam. Couldn't you use it to place calls to (your own) expensive phone numbers and rake in the cash that way?
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Feb 14, 2014 17:26
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Swink posted:"Printer is out of toner" So it's all of them!
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Mar 5, 2014 09:58
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evobatman posted:RIP fellow goon and SH/SC'er Evilmuppet What?
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Mar 10, 2014 12:46
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Hopefully he's in a better place now.
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m.hache posted:So it's Microsoft's fault then. Why did you tell Microsoft about your domain admin password, blackswordca?
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May 2, 2014 12:52
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Lareous posted:I'm at a loss to how you'd manage HVAC other than call the repair guy when it breaks. You're now that guy.
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May 12, 2014 19:24
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Your project managers are allowed to delete anything?
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May 13, 2014 14:44
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They can't do payroll because one machine failed? That doesn't sound like it's Microsoft's fault.
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Jun 22, 2014 19:01
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Daylen Drazzi posted:Why not just disable all but the necessary USB ports in BIOS and then password protect BIOS? Then it doesn't matter a drat bit if someone installs a key logger because even the dumbest user is going to realize that their keyboard or mouse isn't working. Physical key loggers work because they're in between the keyboard and USB port. 
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Jul 11, 2014 13:55
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Are you running SCOM? We're running a report that dumps all the Event ID 4740s into our mailbox so we can quickly check the source of the lockouts (okay okay, we can determine if it's internal or external). Most of the time we just blame ActiveSync devices.
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Aug 5, 2014 12:31
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m.hache posted:Maybe on a cell phone. I'm pretty sure a single season of anything on Netflix will go over 12GB. Not really, more like 2GB. At least on my laptop.
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Aug 13, 2014 15:08
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Great Beer posted:I don't know if any of you have had the displeasure of working with a company called Deloitte but they have the worst loving support in the world. All tickets are immediately bounced back to desk side and the one person that does reply to questions is both an idiot and barely speaks English. Hey, I work for deloitte. Which software? Hell, which country?
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Aug 18, 2014 09:21
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spankmeister posted:Isn't Deloitte kinda like KPMG in that all their divisions are all loosely related but separate kingdoms? Used to be, but it's changing (mostly to reduce costs).
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Aug 18, 2014 11:32
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Lum posted:That actually brings up a serious question I have for the UK people here. Unite or CWU, I think.
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Sep 8, 2014 14:55
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Hell, you don't even need Google. The Office help is pretty awesome.
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Sep 8, 2014 16:13
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Lum posted:Welp, I'm now a member of the Unite union, and apparently I'm not the only one in my division who is (the union rep is a software developer up at head office). Start learning the Internationale and stockpile on molotov cocktails. Since you work in IT, you should have plenty of alcohol, all you need is sand and fuel. Welcome, comrade.
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Sep 8, 2014 17:09
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less than three posted:One day our place was doing fire alarm testing or something, and the FIRE strobe light outside the datacentre entrance didn't shut off when they were finished. I took a screenshot of our datacentre temperature monitoring map and changed almost all of the green boxes to red, laid it on top of where the usual monitoring map is. The NOC guy who was on lunch when I did it burst into a meeting the rest of us were sitting in slightly panicked but unsure if he should have interrupted us "Uhh... guys sorry to interrupt, you know what's up with the datacentre? It seems to be on fire?" Extreme Disaster Recovery test
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Sep 15, 2014 09:37
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Lease your printers.
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Sep 23, 2014 14:03
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