Creating Terrible Movies in the Name of Jesus: Christian Movie Megathread

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > Cinema Discusso > Creating Terrible Movies in the Name of Jesus: Christian Movie Megathread

Forgall: Oct 16, 2012; by Azathoth

It looks like he's about to brain the viewer with candy cane while smiling psychotically.

Wild T posted:

My irrational hatred for Kirk Cameron aside

That's perfectly rational.

# ¿ Aug 30, 2014 15:17

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# ¿ May 14, 2024 03:12

Forgall: Oct 16, 2012; by Azathoth

Grendels Dad posted:

Evil flamboyant homosexuals are awesome and should be in movies more.

That's something I'd really rather avoid.

# ¿ Oct 7, 2014 11:53

Forgall: Oct 16, 2012; by Azathoth

Cythereal posted:

There's a certain strain of evangelical (not all, but those that believe this make the news and those that don't... don't) that believes that a "one world order" is foretold in the book of Revelation as a necessary precursor to the end times and have latched onto the UN as that herald of apocalypse, and therefore oppose it. Same reason they oppose anything that smacks of a national ID system or anything like that: the mark of the Beast.

Don't they want apocalypse to happen?

# ¿ Nov 12, 2014 00:01

Forgall: Oct 16, 2012; by Azathoth

ChickenMedium posted:

I don't think I've ever heard of anything more cynical than "a Christmas movie telling Christians that all the awfully un-Christian commercialized aspects of Christmas that they partake in every year are Jesus-approved." It's literally the kind of thing that evangelicals claim Satan is constantly doing.

You are not the first to make this observation.

# ¿ Nov 12, 2014 01:12

Forgall: Oct 16, 2012; by Azathoth

FrostedButts posted:

I'll see your Christian examination of He-Man and raise you a Satanic expose on Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (bonus points for being offended by Michael Jackson, MC Hammer and Vanilla Ice).
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JSXwWZ2SFw4

I think we can all agree that Vanilla Ice is of the Devil.

# ¿ May 12, 2015 14:14

Forgall: Oct 16, 2012; by Azathoth

K. Waste posted:

The thing I love about that premise is how little sense it makes. The cultural stereotype is that Black people are really hardcore Christians, not that they need the grace of white people. It would make way more sense if it were about a Black preacher who came to a mostly white, secularized neighborhood and tried to stir them up.

Conservatives tend to ignore this stereotype when they aren't trying to pit black people and gay people against each other.

# ¿ Jul 6, 2015 21:21

Forgall: Oct 16, 2012; by Azathoth

Mr Ice Cream Glove posted:

New christian movie did extremely well in box office #s (Only in 1,135 theaters and made 11 million)

From the people who brought you Fireproof and Courageous

War Room

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mIl-XY9t_Lw

Here is what Kirk Cameron said

And of course like every christian movie by these directors, they whore out a long list of resources created specifically for the movie

http://warroommovieresources.com/

Wait, so they aren't fighting demons or anything, just a failing marriage? :laffo:

# ¿ Aug 30, 2015 19:10

Forgall: Oct 16, 2012; by Azathoth

sbaldrick posted:

I know C.S. Lewis was an ultra-Christian rear end in a top hat but I personal give him a bit of a pass due to the whole trench warfare PTSD stuff. I'd find religion after that too.

Here's a great TV show everyone can watch, it's called Born Again Virgin

http://tvone.tv/17349/born-again-virgin-watch-the-pilot-episode/

I'm sure everyone will love it.

Will it have divinely restored hymen?

# ¿ Aug 31, 2015 20:24

Forgall: Oct 16, 2012; by Azathoth

Mr Ice Cream Glove posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SM38JU9LoJc

Homo With A Chainsaw, sequel to Hobo With A Shotgun.

# ¿ Oct 15, 2015 10:53

Forgall: Oct 16, 2012; by Azathoth

Robotnik Nudes posted:

Seeing a dude who literally believe SATAN GAVE THESE SORCERERS I SANE DEMON POWERS TO guess your card is loving awe inspiring as a kook watcher. I'd become worried that all kookery was winding down and I'm so enthused to see there's still some truly insane bullshit around to find and enjoy.

How could you look at the internet and think kookery was winding down. This poo poo is just everywhere and is getting worse.

# ¿ Nov 15, 2015 12:41

Forgall: Oct 16, 2012; by Azathoth

MonsieurChoc posted:

What is the question? Is it the Crocoduck?

You can pay 20 bucks and find out.

# ¿ Aug 1, 2016 15:13

Forgall: Oct 16, 2012; by Azathoth

Electric Lady posted:

When I went to university they were passing out DVDs similar to that but for abortion. The boxes said it was "one question" that would make you re-think the way you think about abortion.

I did some research and the question was something along the lines of "If you knew you were going to give birth to literally Adolf Hitler would you carry the baby to term" so I expect the question for this movie is probably about that stupid.

Wait, isn't that an argument for abortion?

# ¿ Aug 2, 2016 07:22

Forgall: Oct 16, 2012; by Azathoth

Basebf555 posted:

So its totally cool to show violence like a guy walking into town and mowing down some people with a silenced gun, as long as the overall message is pro-Christian?

In later Left Behind books Jesus shows up personally to explode people with magic.

# ¿ Dec 19, 2016 22:02

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# ¿ May 14, 2024 03:12

Forgall: Oct 16, 2012; by Azathoth

Mr Ice Cream Glove posted:

I picture the Vietnam scene in Watchmen

That's pretty much exactly it.

# ¿ Dec 19, 2016 23:24

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > Cinema Discusso > Creating Terrible Movies in the Name of Jesus: Christian Movie Megathread