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When I was a small child, my babysitter, apparently appalled at my lack of Christian upbringing due to being Jewish, decided she would try her best to convert me. So she showed me leagues of terrible, terrible Christian children's videos. I can only remember a few, but most notably was HiTops, a stage play about three angels who go down to Earth High School to learn about fads and shoes with honestly some of the worst musical numbers I've ever heard. Also some kids learn about Jesus by joining a Christian band and wearing shoes? To be honest, I don't remember there being a LOT of Jesus talk in it. It was mainly focused on peer pressure. Now the reason this was actually memorable to me is mostly that this whole thing is completely insane, even beyond what you would expect. The angels come in three flavors.  Daft Punk.  Craft Store Nightmare and Space Gandalf.  And then there's the best motherfucker in this movie, Satan, who is some kind of glitter skull-themed Liberache and is the main reason that the babysitter's plan backfired, because how was I ever going to see this guy and not think he was the absolute best. Also every other character is so insufferable that I genuinely wanted him to succeed. He doesn't even really get defeated, he just gets really hosed up on satan booze and painkillers and then just kind of wanders off. Also God appears as a strobe light that only Space Gandalf can understand. HellOnEarth fucked around with this message at 21:56 on Dec 24, 2013 |
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Dec 24, 2013 18:43
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| # ¿ May 16, 2024 03:38 |
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