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Knot My President!
Jan 10, 2005

IOwnCalculus posted:


4. Clean the drat garage.

This

My mom is pretty much a hoarder and took over the garage to store her art supplies, paintings, blenders from the 80's, and duplicates of decade-old cleaning supplies she will never ever ever use or get rid of ever. Every wall of the garage has shrunk four feet inward in an attempt to asphyxiate the dream of sheltering a car or our house's three motorcycles.

This year is the year it all goes away. I will be able to walk through the garage without tripping, and I will be able to access anything I need without pulling off tarps covering useless baubles and trinkets covering garage sale finds since-forgotten, god loving damnit.

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