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 It's time for a new season of Survivor! This time it's newbies only, so let's hope it's a good one or we'll be having returners every season until the show gets cancelled. Season premiere is February 26th. The twist of the season is that there are three tribes: Brains, Brawn and Beauty.   Beauty tribe  Youngest: 21 (two castaways) Oldest: 34 (two castaways) Average: 26.5  Alexis Maxwell Age: 21 Addison, IL Occupation: Student, Northwestern University, Psychology Personal claim to fame: Studying abroad in Ireland and visiting eight different countries while I was there. It made me more independent, adventurous and responsible. Pet Peeves: Guys who turn into “Stage five clingers” and people who blow their nose in public. Reason for Being on Survivor: My dad! He loves the show so much and would kill to be on it. I’m playing for both of us. Twitter: https://twitter.com/alexis_maxwell Meet the cast video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sNrhpYHyFLg Considers herself a brain in a beauty disguise. Gonna use her 3 months of psychology studies to influence the game. Might even be an actual fan!  Brice Johnston Age: 27 Philadelphia, PA Occupation: Social worker/Shoe salesman Personal claim to fame: Being the only person from my immediate family to graduate college. Reason for Being on Survivor: I love the show and I’ve been watching it for years. It has been a lifelong dream to be on Survivor. Do You Consider Yourself a Brain, a Beauty or a Brawn?: I would consider myself the package deal. I’m very easy on the eyes (beauty). I’m college educated, have common sense, am very socially aware and have street smarts (brains). Plus, I consider myself to be physically fit; I’m a natural born runner (brawn). So I’m a three for one kind of deal. Twitter: https://twitter.com/BriceIzyah Meet the cast video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hp929t_treU Probably very annoying. On the other hand he's a huge fan, so that's a big plus.  Jefra Bland Age: 22 Campbellsville, Ky Occupation: Miss Kentucky Teen USA (yup), professional second place finisher (doubtfully in this game though). Personal claim to fame: Winning the title of Miss Kentucky Teen USA 2009 and making the Top 15 at Miss Teen USA. Beat cervical cancer. Pet Peeves: People who have bad teeth and smack their gum. Survivor Contestant You Are Most Like: Chelsea Meissner as far as being a country girl and Kim Spradlin when it comes to being ballsy with big moves. Twitter: https://twitter.com/JefraBland Meet the cast video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LAuVSkv6ZHY Likely recruited. As bland as her name, first boot material.  Jeremiah Wood Age: 34 Dobson, N.C. Occupation: Male model Personal claim to fame: Buying my first house on my own. Hobbies: Fishing, hunting and slow-pitch softball. Twitter: http://twitter.com/JeremiahPWood Meet the cast video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oX8SDwosz3U A true outdoorsman, which should work in his favour. Might be the next JT if he has half a brain inside that pretty head. I like him.  LJ McKanas Age: 34 Boston, Mass. Occupation: Horse trainer Personal claim to fame: Making the Hall of Fame at Northeastern University and my high school. Do You Consider Yourself a Brain, a Beauty or a Brawn?: I’d consider myself a Brawn. I’m a down-to-earth, rugged guy who is not afraid to get his hands dirty. Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder and brains seem to be smarts lacking the physical abilities. You can be brawny and good-looking and we have a brain. Twitter: https://twitter.com/LJMcKanas Meet the cast video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W99NP_aDIMQ#t=95 Another outdoorsman/athlete, also seems to be quite intelligent. Claims to be a puzzle freak. A dreamboat zen horse trainer who might be a contender.  Morgan McLeod Age: 21 San Jose, CA Occupation: Ex-NFL Cheerleader, Student at SJSU. Personal claim to fame: I am most proud of being selected to the cheerleading squad for the San Francisco 49ers while still in high school. Pet Peeves: Slow drivers, guys leaving the toilet seat up, when people fish for compliments, terrible pickup lines. If You Could Have 3 Things on The Island What Would They Be and Why?: A razor because hairy legs are not cute, a camera to document my adventure, and my iPhone so I can Instagram and Facebook when I am bored. Reason for Being on Survivor: The chance to experience a once in a lifetime journey and to show everyone that just because I have huge boobs and a pretty face does not mean I am dumb, it just means I look better when I am winning. (ok this is a pretty hilarious answer) Twitter: https://twitter.com/_morganmcleod Meet the cast video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tNpelNjLr90 Ok I was wrong about Ms. Bland, Morgan is the real first boot.  Brains tribe  Youngest: 21 Oldest: 45 Average age: 33.67  Spencer Bledsoe Age: 21 Chicago, Ill. Occupation: Economics Student at the University of Chicago Personal claim to fame: Captain of my high school cross country and track teams, Georgia’s 2009-2010 High School Chess Champion, tying for 1st at the World Open Chess tournament for a prize of $6,609 and becoming a U.S. Chess Expert. Survivor Contestant You Are Most Like: The cleverness and strategic planning of Stephen, but the personality of Marty. Like Marty, I am a natural leader and can come off as pompous or bombastic. Also, I shared Marty’s disdain for Jane on S21. Do You Consider Yourself a Brain, a Beauty or a Brawn?: A Brain, in both life and Survivor super fandom. I’ve seen every episode. I know the game inside and out. I’ll know what I’m doing in camp life; I could probably even build a shelter just using rocks. When my body is withered and I’m left with only my t-shirt and tighty whities, I won’t be a little boy out there. I’ll rely on my mind. Twitter: https://twitter.com/SpencerBGM Meet the cast video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=psX3-rFxjqY Second ever chess grandmaster on Survivor. Maybe he turns out to be a Heidik -level sociopath mastermind? Or maybe he turns out to be an annoying smug sperglord. Dunno, only time will tell.  David Samson Age: 45 Plantation, FL Occupation: President, Miami Marlins Personal claim to fame: Got local government in Miami to contribute over 350 million dollars to a new baseball park during the recession. Survivor Contestant You Are Most Like: Boston Rob. He won the game before others thought it had started. Why You Think You Will Be the Sole Survivor: I always win, because people underestimate me. Do You Consider Yourself a Brain, a Beauty or a Brawn? I consider myself 60% brain, 35% beauty and 5% brawn. While I have been able to accomplish certain athletic feats like being the only Team President to complete the Ironman World Championship in Hawaii, those feats are generally more a test of the mind than the body. The very hardest thing to accomplish is to convince your brain to keep going when your body is telling you to stop. I have been able to control my brain to maximize whatever talents I may have both on and off the field. Twitter: Too cool for tweeter. Meet the cast video:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7vM7uLyPiEY Seems like a smarmy shitlord, but has a lot of things going for him. First head of state to play Survivor.  Garrett Adelstein Age: 27 Santa Monica, CA Occupation: High stakes poker player Personal claim to fame: Being valedictorian of my high school class of over 500 students; graduating Summa Cum Laude with Honors at The University of Arizona. Inspiration in Life: No specific inspirations. I try and model my life after people who are willing to dedicate their lives to a skill and thus excel at the highest level in that field. Reason for Being on Survivor: Win enough money to impress girls in LA; self-growth as I will be forced to deal with extreme circumstances in a way I never imagined possible. Why You Think You Will Be the Sole Survivor: Dedicated 2,000 hours in preparing for the strategic, social and physical elements of Survivor. Did everything from 50 hours of yoga, to over-analyzing every episode, to mastering slide puzzles to ready myself. I essentially devoted my entire life to preparing for this adventure for the previous 6 months. Do You Consider Yourself a Brain, a Beauty or a Brawn and Why?: I’ll go with the modest answer and say all three. I’ll probably be one of the physically strongest, most intelligent and my mom says I’m very handsome to boot. Twitter: https://twitter.com/GarrettAdelstei Meet the cast video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s7QamMuNRg0 I have high hopes for Garrett, but he'll probably let me down. Might be too smug for his own good. I like the dude.  J’Tia Taylor Age: 31 Chicago, Ill. Occupation: Nuclear engineer/ex-model Personal claim to fame: Passing my dissertation defense, because I was the expert on the subject matter and held my own against my professors, and being the first black female to successfully defend and receive a PhD from the department. Hobbies: Watching movies, reading and playing strategic games. Pet Peeves: Ignorant, close-minded people, being late/off schedule, and chunks in food/drinks (e.g. rocky road ice cream). Survivor Contestant You Are Most Like: Richard Hatch. He played the game authentically and originally since he had no precedence, and was true to who he was. Twitter: https://twitter.com/JTiaPhD (yup, that's PHD in her tweeter handle) Meet the cast video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ptUVsUc2K_o   Kassandra “Kass” McQuillen Age: 41 Tehachapi, CA. Occupation: Attorney Personal claim to fame: My daughter, putting myself through law school while working full-time, and winning $1.2 million in my first trial with no court experience. Survivor Contestant You Are Most Like: Sandra, she didn’t seem to be in it for anything but winning money for her family. Who Do You Think Has the Best Chance in the Game of Survivor: Brains, Beauty or Brawn? I’m guessing Brains because I plan to win while not caring how I look and quite possibly sucking at challenges. Twitter: https://twitter.com/KassMcQ Meet the cast video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JBTiW785RQM Never missed an episode of Survivor. Going to tell people she's an animal handler - but what would an animal handler be doing in the brains tribe? I have a feeling your cunning plan won't work.  Latasha “Tasha” Fox Age: 37 St Louis, MO Occupation: Certified Public Accountant Personal claim to fame: Being a former St. Louis Rams cheerleader. Pet Peeves: People biting down on the fork as it leaves their mouths, bad breath and panty lines. Survivor Contestant You Are Most Like: Ozzy, due to his physical play, and Sandra, who did what she had to do to win and not be apologetic. Do You Consider Yourself a Brain, a Beauty or a Brawn? I consider myself a Brainy Beauty with a Brawny physique because of my intelligence, inner and outer beauty, biceps and physical strength. Twitter: https://twitter.com/missfoxytasha Meet the cast video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KgaT4Slz6Zo Might be a dark horse.  Brawn tribe  Youngest: 29 (three castaways) Oldest: 48 Average: 36.67  Cliff Robinson Age: 46 Newark, N.J. Occupation: Former NBA All-Star Personal claim to fame: Playing 18 years in the NBA. (Played for the Portland Trail Blazers, Phoenix Suns, Detroit Pistons, Golden State Warriors and New Jersey Nets) Why You Think You’ll “Survive” Survivor: I know how to fish, cook, and have good athleticism. Twitter: https://twitter.com/UncleCliffy30 Meet the cast video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FTUahrz_65o Seems to be dumb as bricks. He's James 2.0, kept around for challenges and then quickly booted after the merge.  Lindsey Ogle Age: 29 Kokomo, IN Occupation: Hairstylist/Bartender Personal claim to fame: Rising above all obstacles with a smile, by myself. Pet Peeves: Incapable people, party poopers and when people don’t tell you that you have something in your teeth. Why You Think You Will Be the Sole Survivor: I have overcome major resistance and challenges by myself. I am a fighter and there’s no limit to what I can do for my baby. Twitter: Too cool for tweeter Meet the cast video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ftwOHgmSPdE  Sarah Lacina Age: 29 Cedar Rapids, Iowa Occupation: Police officer Personal claim to fame: I’m most proud of graduating college in four years. Pet Peeves: I hate when I can hear people chew their food, when people leave me voicemails (I’ll call you back if I don’t answer) and stupid people. Why You Think You Will Be the Sole Survivor: I have the brains and skills to dominate this game. I’m very strategic and determined. I interview people on a daily basis and get confessions. I will destroy this game. Twitter: https://twitter.com/sarahlacina Meet the cast video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=66KKqOixj9A Her interview sounds like  , doesn't sound very passionate. Tony Vlachos Age: 39 Jersey City, N.J. Occupation: Police officer Personal claim to fame: Becoming a Jersey City police officer. Twitter: Too cool for tweeter Pet Peeves: Thugs who wear skinny jeans.  If You Could Have 3 Things on The Island What Would They Be and Why?: Cigarettes, coffee and liquor. I don’t smoke or drink coffee or liquor, but I would love to bring those items with me just so that I can barter with my tribemates! Survivor Contestant You Are Most Like: Russell Hantz, because I can be just as devious. Boston Rob, because I can be just as slick. Meet the cast video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P1v1No-XTIQ I like his attitude, he seems be a really fun guy to watch. I hope he stays around.  Trish Hegarty Age: 48 Needham, MA Occupation: Pilates trainer Personal claim to fame: My children Inspiration in Life: Helen Keller was an Earth Angel that taught the world a whole new language in touch and opened our eyes to the power of sense and created the gateway to what we now call special needs. (  )Survivor Contestant You Are Most Like: I relate to Danni Boatwright. She played a true and honest game. She crushed the challenges and her social skills were top notch. Twitter: https://twitter.com/TrishHegarty Meet the cast video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G81zCHlpfzY Going to be very annoying.  Yung “Woo” Hwang Age: 29 Newport Beach, CA Occupation: Martial Arts Instructor, Personal trainer, Surf instructor Personal claim to fame: Graduating College Survivor Contestant You Are Most Like: With my martial arts experience, my game is very strong, humble, grateful and respectful, much like Ozzy. Why You Think You Will Be the Sole Survivor: This game was made for me! I’m smart and can play a great social game. People tend to like me. I’m fast and agile. I’ll do great in obstacle course challenges. I have undeniable focus and concentration and I’ll smash the competition in balancing challenges. I can swim well and climb coconut trees. I am SURVIVOR! Twitter: https://twitter.com/YungWoo23 Meet the cast video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V6iBTcCnkSY Cool dude. That's it! Personally I think the cast looks really good and fun. It looks like there are hardly any recruits and almost everyone claims to be a superfan. I feel it's going to be a great season.
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Newbie guide by Occupation: SURVIVOR NEWBIES GUIDE HELP I HAVE NEVER HEARD OF THIS 'SURVIVOR' PLEASE INFORM ME OF WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT Welcome to the Survivor thread. Inside, we discuss the current season of Survivor; usually, bitch about how this season isn't very good; and, fondly remember, and argue about the relative quality of, previous seasons of Survivor: probably the greatest reality competition show ever except for maybe Amazing Race or Top Chef. Survivor's premise: A group of 18 to 20 or so contestants, from all walks of life, are stuck on a (usually tropical) remote paradise and forced to live together for 39 days; gathering their own food, building their own shelter, and purifying their own water. Most of the time (but not always) they group is split into two opposing, equal teams, called tribes. (Some seasons have more than two tribes-as many as four- but no matter how many tribes there are, each tribe has the same number of contestants at the start.) The tribes must work together to form a community, in the hopes of one contestant becoming the Sole Survivor and winning one million dollars. A typical Survivor season has three "phases", all of differing lengths.
Man this show sounds complicated. Nah it really isn't. It's basically Lying: The Game; the players attempt to form alliances that are strong enough so that whenever they're forced to vote someone out, their names aren't on the chopping block. Usually this is done via lying and manipulation. That's basically it. The genius of the show is the jury: the jury makes it so regardless of how well an individual player does, if they're a cutthroat, lying, evil, bastard who makes life hell for everyone else they won't win the money (cough cough Russell). Therefore, a major part of the show is being able to appease and placate people who will eventually end up eliminated, usually by the player him or herself. It creates a HUGE strategy component to the game and is why the show is so unique and awesome. When does this show air Usually twice a year, two seasons: Once during September (usually runs for about 15 episodes, ends around Christmas), and once during February (also runs for about 15 episodes, ending mid-May). Both seasons of Survivor that air in a television season are usually filmed-back-to-back and more recently, in the same location to save on location filming. Oh this show sounds rad what should I watch The "recommended" watch order of the "best" seasons of Survivor, if you have a shitload of time and want to watch the show arc and become more and more strategic over time: Borneo (season 1), Australia (season 2), Marquesas (season 4), The Amazon (season 6), Pearl Islands (season 7), All-Stars (season 8), Vanuatu (season 9), Palau (season 10), Guatemala (season 11), Panama (season 12), Cook Islands (season 13), China (season 15), Micronesia- Fans v. Favorites (season 16), Tocantins (season 18), Samoa (season 19), Heroes v. Villains (season 20), Redemption Island (season 22), Philippines (season 25). Why:
Wow that's a lot of show to watch. Abridge it? Yeah sure. Watch China, Tocantins, Samoa, or Cook Islands, they're what the Survivor thread considers the best seasons with no returning players. Fans v. Favorites and Heroes v. Villains are the best seasons of Survivor overall; however, a lot of their appeal is in knowing the characters who are participating from their seasons. In other words, you'll have to watch everything I listed to get the full effect of the greatness of Micronesia/ HvV. Also, if you're at all interested in what non-goons have to say Dalton Ross and Jeff Probst rank the Survivor seasons for you. But why would you do that? Survivor goons know best  Glossary of Terms The Survivor thread can get really, really jargony from time to time because we're all a bunch of Survivor spergs who just use a ton of shorthand. Here's what they mean: Pagonged: In the first-ever season of Survivor, the Tagi tribe ended up with more players than the Pagong tribe going into the merge and ended up voting tribal lines, eliminating all members of the Pagong tribe from the game before voting themselves out. This revolutionary strategy has been copied in pretty much every Survivor since, and when it's successful it's called a "Pagonging", in honor of the eliminated tribe. It's the reason that it's so important to win immunity challenges pre-merge- usually both tribes enter the merge and vote tribal lines, so whichever team enters the merge with more players usually ends up the one which "wins". Ulonged: In Palau, the Ulong tribe didn't win a single immunity challenge and kept on voting out the wrong players (usually their strongest or smartest), so it all snowballed into them losing every single immunity challenge pre-merge. Only Stephanie survived from the Ulong tribe to get "conquered" by the opposing tribe and eventually voted out. We now speculate as to whether or not a tribe that does miserably in the early going and racks up a bunch of early game losses will be "Ulonged"- will lose every single immunity challenge. HII (Hidden Immunity Idol): Introduced in Guatemala, the HII was an object hidden at camp or Exile Island, that when found and played (usually after a series of clues leading to the HII's location were given) could prevent a player from going home that night. It could only be used once. Supposed to delay or gently caress up Pagongings, initially, it was really weak- it had to be played before the votes were cast, so what ended up happening was everyone switched their votes to someone else in the alliance they were targeting and the play continued as normal. Then, in Cook Islands the HII was revamped to be obscenely strong- it had to be played after the votes were read (the player with the next-most votes would go home if the player with the most votes played the HII), which meant Yul just told everyone that he had the idol and would play it for his alliance members, making his core alliance untouchable as everyone else ended up being voted out, afraid of being targeted by his alliance. After Cook Islands the HII's rules were again revamped to what they are now, that it has to be played after the votes are cast but before they are read- basically, if it's played right can really change the game but it's not overpowerful nonsense like it was in CI. Used to be only one HII in the game, usually at Exile Island, now there is one HII for each tribe, usually located at their camp. Double boot: Usually early on into a Survivor season, there will be an episode where both tribes have to eliminate a tribe member (both go to tribal council), and the only challenge of the episode is either for individual immunity or for reward. Called a double boot episode when it happens. Double elimination: A twist featured at the end of an episode of Survivor is that the tribe that lost the immunity challenge, unbeknownst to them, has to eliminate not one but two members. Usually revealed after the tribe has finished voting out a tribemate, they are usually given no time to deliberate and must vote again immediately. Purple rocks: In the event of a tie at Tribal Council, there is a revote, with only the people receiving the most votes being eligible to receive votes during that revote. If the revote also ends in a tie, Survivors draw rocks, with the exception of the players receiving votes and any players with immunity. Whichever player draws the differently coloured rock is eliminated from the game. It's happened once before, and the differently coloured rock was purple. This is a powerful incentive for players to avoid ties, as it takes players' fates out of their hands and puts it in the hands of chance, while ensuring that three of the most powerful players in the game remain in it. It means that each individual player sees a strong reason to flip from his or her alliance, and it's worked. Ties have largely been avoided for the past 22 seasons or so. This is true at every tribal council but the Final Four. The math for the purple rocks doesn't work where there are only 4 players left - take away the immune player and the players receiving votes, and there is only one player left to draw rocks. Unfortunately, production only realized this didn't work after going through with it once, in Survivor Marquesas. Now, ties at Final Four are resolved with a challenge between the tied players, usually a fire-making challenge. (All credit goes to Pinterest Mom for this entry) Blindside: When a tribal council seems to be set up so one or one of two possible players are getting eliminated, but somehow either a secret coalition or a surprising idol play makes it so someone else who nobody in the tribe suspected of being eliminated gets eliminated, it's called a "blindside". Usually sets up hilarious reaction gifs that the thread reposts infinitely. Eel/Shambo.gif: Totally awesome! Make sure to ask the thread if you're new all about it. The results will totally surprise you! Hantzed: Named after Russell Hantz from Samoa's proclivities to find idols without clues, it's now used as a term to describe a player who looks for HIIs without a clue, or a player who accomplishes said feat. Splitting votes/Voodoo strategy: Originating in Cook Islands by noted crazy person and proto-Coach Cao Boi, the idea of an alliance that splits its votes between two members to "out" the idol. For instance, if an alliance has 6 members to an opposing alliance's 3, but one person in the 3 has an HII, the alliance would voted 3 for one member in the alliance and 3 for another, so even if the idol is played one of the members of the alliance is voted out (since it'd be a 3/3/3 tie, the idol would eliminate 3 votes for one member which would result in a 3/3 tie and a revote). It's extremely risky, and we went through a long eight-season stretch of it backfiring on the majority alliance every single time it was used. In the last five seasons, though, it's been used very frequently, up to three times a season, and has worked almost every single time. It's an example of the Survivor metagame evolving and players wisening up to new tactics. (All credit goes to Pinterest Mom for this entry) Who the gently caress is Kelly: Usually anybody named Kelly in any season of Survivor will be a totally generic, personality-less automaton, usually the boring cheerleader type. Someone will post "Who the gently caress is Kelly" after cast announcements if the name Kelly is included because it's like so funny or something. You know how goons are. Pony/Poison: Usually after cast announcements, but before the season airs, thread members will pick a "Pony" (someone who they think will be awesome and totally win) and a "Poison" (someone who they think will suck and be an annoying rear end in a top hat and will root to lose). Thread ponies are usually anybody who's intelligent or seems to be a hardcore Survivor fan, and thread poisons are people who look or sound stupid, racists, morons, and type-A brodudes (because we're all fat, ugly goons). Challenge beast/challenge monster: A person who's really physically adept and capable, who wins challenges for their team almost single-handedly. Usually kept around until right before or right after the merge so they don't go one a "challenge run" and make the final two/three and win based on sheer physical strength. Noted challenge beasts include Ozzy and JT. Provider: Usually an older dude who's really good at hunting and working who thinks, foolishly, that their "tribe value" will somehow save him from elimination- because then who will get the tribe food/firewood then, huh?! Usually really stupid and naive. Rupert is the king of this type of player. Mastermind/puppetmaster: The strategic guy in the tribe. Usually the one who facilitates blindsides and backstabbings. If they make it to the FTC they're always in danger of being bitter juried out of a win. Russell is the premier mastermind player, but Yul and Chris are also notable. Under the radar: The most common strategy of the game currently, reliant on letting the mastermind or challenge beast draw all the heat, never pissing anyone off, and getting into the FTC and winning it all based on not having done anything wrong to anyone ever. Notable UTR players: Sophie, Natalie Social gamer: A player who forms strong alliances with everyone on the eventual jury and isn't physically strong or the mastermind, but is able to sway people the way they want votes to land. Social game players: Sandra, Parvati, Amber Bitter jury: Because the game is reliant on a jury to vote on the winner there is a perception that sometimes the player who "deserves" to win gets "cheated" out of a win because they were such a rude, arrogant backstabbing rear end in a top hat to the people they betrayed that the jury doesn't vote for anyone so much as against a player. Also leads to really awkward, awful FTCs where a bunch of lying douchebags rail against other lying douchebags for being lying douchebags on a game show, as opposed to any sort of strategy discussion. If you're watching an FTC and you see someone bring up the word "integrity", congrats, you've found a bitter jury member! Although jury management is an extremely important part of the game juries have generally gotten more bitter and more angry over time, which has led to generally worse FTCs and finales. Goat: Someone useless, awful, or crazy that the mastermind player lugs with him or her to the final two/three ("riding the goat"). The jury is then forced to vote between someone they hate with a passion or the mastermind that orchestrated their removal. Really common in the old seasons of Survivor, before the implementation of the final three in Cook Islands- indeed, part of the reason for the final three change was so that "bringing a goat" wasn't as viable a strategy any more - it still was used as recently as Redemption Island with Boston Rob lugging Phillip all the way to FTC. Goats have the side benefit of attracting all the heat vote-wise until the final two/three. Notable goats: Phillip, Twila Coattail rider: What certain UTR players get accused of being- instead of being subtle and quiet, they're accused of being boring and unimaginative, relying on the mastermind/challenge beast to do all the heavy lifting. Notable "coattail riders": Natalie, Sophie. Throwing an immunity challenge: The concept of intentionally losing an immunity challenge because there's a member of the tribe which is somehow cancerous to the tribe or is otherwise undesirable. Always, always a terrible loving idea and it never, ever works out well for the tribe in question. Seriously if someone urges to throw an immunity challenge they're guaranteed to be an idiot with no sense of strategy. Mactor: Portmanteau of "Model/Actor", if you see any contestant with either of those two as their "profession", especially if it's literally both, they're probably this. Mactors get a lot of heat from diehard Survivor fans and this thread because they're usually not Survivor "fans", and indeed didn't even apply for the season- most are actively recruited by Survivor's casting director (Lynne Spillman). The prevailing theory is that she actively recruits any friends of her best friends- who are former Survivor contestants like Parvati Shallow, Amanda Kimmel, etc. She also primarily recruits from the gym she goes to in the LA area and basically hot people she meets within the city. Mactors are hated for a variety of reasons: 1) Usually, they have no strategic sense of the way the game is played- so they go on and on about "honor" and "integrity" and think they're the smartest fuckers ever to exist for coming up with, say, the idea of the blindside or some really basic strategic idea. 2) Usually, they're lazy whiny fuckers who don't do anything around camp and constantly complain about how hungry they are and just throw massive pity parties for themselves. 3) Mactors are usually the ones who quit- quitters MASSIVELY gently caress up the game and game flow in a variety of different ways, and quitters and quit threatens have lead to the prevailing trend of current Survivor seasons to have overstuffed and overcast tribes with a bunch of extra people because they "figure in" that people are going to quit. It also leads to situations like Nicaragua where two people quit in the same night and ended up on the jury, which was just loving reprehensible. 4) Most commonly and annoyingly, they've never seen a season of Survivor beyond the ones that CBS sends to all its contestants once they're cast (which is always the last 2-3 seasons), so it leads to really loving annoying poo poo like Nicaragua. Nicaragua was the season immediately after Samoa and Heroes v Villains, which were dominated in their screentime by Russell, so Nicaragua had about 6 people in their pre-interviews say they were the next Russell Hantz. The gameplay also suffered as about half of the contestants tried to play the exact same Russell game, with horrid results. It ended up making the season really, really boring to watch as everyone tried to backstab each other and be the biggest dick for no strategic reason other than "the only Survivor we watched Russell did it and got a lot of screentime, and we want screentime to launch modelling/acting careers". (This also happened to a much less significant extent during South Pacific/One World as a bunch of mactors tried to emulate Boston Rob's cult-like play during Redemption Island). Film cycles: Every odd-numbered season of Survivor is usually filmed during mid-to-late summer. The show then takes a two-week break as they send home the previous season's contestants, set up the new tribe locations, send the last bit of film, fly in the new challenges, and set up the new film locations as they fly in the next season's contestants. The next season's -the even-numbered season's- contestants usually compete from early September to early October, so right before winter really kicks into high gear. (Early September to early October is also when the odd-numbered season that was just finished starts airing). What does this mean? Well, in some film cycles (notably seasons 11-12-Palau-Guatemala, seasons 15-16-China-Micronesia, and seasons 19-20 Samoa-Heroes v. Villains) they bring back a returning contestant (or two) from the previous, odd-numbered season to compete in the next, even-numbered season. (This has happened most famously with Amanda Kimmel from China and Russell Hantz from Samoa). Doing back-to-back Survivor runs with only a two-week break in the middle is an insane test of endurance. The contestants that do so usually get dangerously thin, and if they make it to the finale in back-to-back seasons (like with Amanda and Russell), have been playing Survivor for so long without a real break that they start to lose it. This is most famously seen with Russell's HvV play, wherein near the end he completely loving loses his grip on sanity and becomes a paranoid mess, which directly leads to his loss during the finale. He starts plotting a bunch of un-Hantz-like "stabbing his closest companions in the back" moves that are totally not in keeping with how he normally plays the game and only make the jury pissed off at him more than they already are. The only feasible explanation- since Russell is usually a pragmatic and calculated player- is that he spends so much time playing Survivor that he sees everyone as his enemy and basically develops low-grade cabin fever. Likewise, Amanda Kimmel during the finale of Micronesia (the season she back-to-backed in) has spent so much time plotting to stab people in the back and betray their trust that she devolves into a weepy mess during her FTC performance. Which, again, probably had something to do with spending so much time playing Survivor and not spending time in normal interactions with other human beings. That being said, doing back-to-back Survivor runs with no breaks is also a huge benefit; if appearing in both season in a film cycle, a returning player (who is usually really, really good) has both the experience of having just finished playing a game of Survivor (so they're in the right mental "mood" to play) while also playing against people who have no idea who they are, their personalities, or how they play (the short delay between seasons means the even-numbered season contestants don't get dvds of the season which just finished filming). This, for instance, hugely benefitted Russell on HvV because Boston Rob completely and utterly discounted him as a viable threat until it was almost too late, and the fact that nobody knew who he was or how he played literally meant he got an idol for free out of it. You'll see Survivor thread alums debate and argue whenever the interminably awful "Russell- greatest player ever?" arguements start up, and whenever they talk about "film cycles" or Russell's various HvV advantages (and disadvantages) this is what they mean. Edits: Survivor is, above all else, a tv show. Indeed, it's a tv show that beyond its gameplay attempts to tell a narrative arc for its cast, so sometimes the concept of "edits" and a person getting an "edit" will be bandied around in the Survivor thread. Since, obviously, the editors for each season of Survivor know who win (or at least, who makes the final 2/3 and, more abstractly, the jury), they know that the viewers want to know the eventual winner as well as possible. So, usually, the final 2 to 3 receive a majority of the screentime of the season, especially if the final 2/3 all are part of the same alliance. The viewing audience also wants to know the jury at least fairly well so they usually (with about one to two exceptions) get the rest of the screentime during the season. Beyond that, there's the concept of "character edits".
The Survivor thread usually argues that "X person is getting Y edit, so can/can't win, is gonna make the merge/be eliminated before the merge, etc". However, it all kind of boils down to informed guessing, since there are so many exceptions to the "guidelines" of how a person who reaches X position is edited the only real hard-and-fast rule that you can hold to is that if someone who up until that episode had no confessional/screen time whatsoever suddenly gets a ton, and they don't do ANYTHING to warrant it like have a legendary freakout, they're being eliminated that episode. Survivor seems to favor presenting an about-to-be-eliminated player in the fullest light possible before they're voted off, but that's pretty much the only really reliable rule to hold to.
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Jan 24, 2014 17:07
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-est player ever. Great season.
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Also let's get these over with: 
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Jan 24, 2014 17:14
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Wee Bairns posted:I haven't seen this one posted in a Survivor thread in several seasons... I don't like people posting that in a derogatory manner because lampreys are loving delicious. Seriously, try some. Delicious.
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Jan 25, 2014 01:46
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Ghostpilot posted:I think a large part of his game will hinge up whether or not he gets recognized, especially given his reputation. Yeah I know poo poo about basketball, but is a club president like a household name who people will recognize or is it like a showrunner on TV which only the hardcore fans know?
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Jan 27, 2014 02:30
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I know everyone hates Colton, but he had a pretty good interview over at Survivor Oz. Dropped some behind the scenes stuff about blood vs water.
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Feb 8, 2014 08:24
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Ghostpilot posted:Given that he told the biggest lie since Fairplay, I'd take what he says with a I have no idea what you're talking about. Colton seems like pretty much a completely different person outside of the island.
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Feb 9, 2014 11:49
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It's time to turn in your producer badge Jeff. You can still host if you promise not to stupid poo poo like this ever again.
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Feb 20, 2014 19:19
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They should hide a couple of fake idols in obvious places Would lead to a funny tribal or two.
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Feb 26, 2014 00:07
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TeamJesus posted:Also this Malnutricia
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Feb 27, 2014 12:05
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Shakugan posted:Jeff's questioning of Spencer made me think that if Spencer had been eliminated, he would have been a lock for being a returnee in a future season. I'm ok with Spencer coming back. I feel so bad for him  This was a masterfully edited episode, I really liked it. You really didn't know what was going to happen. edit: I was expecting to hate Spencer too, but he turned out to be a cool guy.
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Mar 13, 2014 15:46
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The Lord Bude posted:you'd think Tony would be more experienced at knocking doors down. Maybe there's a rooftop jumping challenge coming
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Mar 20, 2014 10:39
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Lone Goat posted:Last time they did this challenge (FvF 2) they never went to the top of the triangle. Reynold appreciation station  Also this is the best season holy poo poo
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Apr 3, 2014 14:25
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Sith Happens posted:I find the thread's lack of Morgan boob gifs from last night's episode disturbing. 
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Apr 3, 2014 14:38
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Lone Goat posted:Jeff also thinks that Redemption Island and the Tyler Perry idol are good ideas. I put little stock in what Jeff thinks. “I would hope we never do All-Stars again, because Survivor is a game about strangers living together. Once they have had that experience and have spent time together socially, it’s a completely different game. It’s stunt casting.” -Jeff Probst 2005
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Apr 8, 2014 14:53
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Guys I'm starting a twitter campaign to get SSpencer fired and/or make him unemployable. Who is with me? Signal boost this!
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Apr 11, 2014 22:44
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That's pretty awesome
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May 3, 2014 16:39
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Kid Nation was incredible, thanks
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Jul 8, 2014 07:11
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The top #1 winner of the top #1 season Chris Dougherty was on Historians a couple days ago. It was pretty glorious. His story on what actually happens after the final tribal council is pretty drat funny. Also it turns out the tribe split wasn't originally supposed to be men/women: when they arrived to the tribal ceremony the locals split them up like that and the producers went "huh, I guess it's men vs women then". A great listen.
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Aug 26, 2014 15:09
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They asked him for two things he wants immediately after the game. He said a beer and a cigarette. They gave him a beer with no opener and a cigarette with no lighter  edit: I mean ok opening a bottle of beer is stupidly easy, but it's still funny.
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Aug 26, 2014 15:50
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Lone Goat posted:Do you have a link to this? I only listen to RHAP Phone posting but it's on The Tribe feed.
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Aug 27, 2014 04:41
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