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When I taught in China near one of my classrooms was a boy's toilet. It absolutely filled the hall with a eye burning piss stench and I avoided it for as long as I could, however a side effect of living in China is that the poor food handling knowledge/attitude there results in you not always choosing when you need to poo poo. So it was inevitable that I would have to go in there and see what I saw. Imagine a long narrow room, white rectangular tile running its length, about shoulder high on either side. But not exactly white any more, more spiderwebbed and yellow. And with many busted sections of tile having fallen off revealing cut rate concrete underneath. On the small distal wall about three meters up hangs a white porcelain tank that you could bathe a buffalo in. A tin rain gutter descends from the tank to a trough. The trough is tiled but it is unmistakably a trough, running the length of the room and canting ninety degrees down into the floor just below your right hand as you stand there. The trough is decorated at irregular intervals by piles of mostly soft boystool of varying colors. Nobody touches the porcelain tank but it flushes anyway, probably at regular intervals, and a bathtub's worth of water comes rushing down the trough, treating you to an incremental close up display of the piles of poo poo before they plummet down the drain. Up until now you've managed to not really see the particulars of anything inbetween the drain and the tank. The detail you're presented of everybody's poo poo breaks the spell, however, and your eyes focus on a middle distance. Scattered around the trough as though a bomb has gone off are at least a dozen Chinese boys. There are absolutely no dividers. If this were Germany or Canada or some other orderly and sane pace a civic agreement would have long ago been brokered and the correct approach and posture to use when addressing the trough would have been fixed. But this isn't those places, this is goddamn China. Some boys straddle the tough and look you in the face while pissing out of their weiners, others face the cistern, some face the right wall, others the left. One has broken even these constraints and straddles the trough while facing the right, reaching behind himself to pull his pants behind with one hand so that he can piss straight down. Likewise with the making GBS threads. One boy squats and shits while talking to his friend who has decided to just sit against the wall and not use the bathroom -- their faces are maybe a foot and a half apart, their knees almost intercross. Like some anatomy textbook of squatting shits every teachable angle of the bony human rear end is displayed, but since this is the modern era these are video slides, not stills. Do you stay and poo poo yourself? Or do you work on another area of cultural assimilation and decide instead to develop sphincter endurance and tone against what feels like a water balloon being repeatedly shoved through your guts against your rear end in a top hat?
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Oct 4, 2014 20:46
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| # ¿ May 14, 2024 06:37 |
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An extremely popular prank among those boys in China was to shove a fat kid into the trough and then call him a dirty pig for the rest of the day.
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Oct 4, 2014 22:47
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