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Problem!
Jan 1, 2007

I am the queen of France.
Whenever I get home the first thing out of my mouth is a high pitched "DOOOOOGS!" Sometimes I accidentally do it when the dogs aren't home and feel like a retard.

Plus the usual singing stupid songs to/about them and mutating their names.

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Problem!
Jan 1, 2007

I am the queen of France.

Sappo569 posted:

- Full conversations with the cat on coming home.

Including "How was your day? Did you have lots of naps?"

I do this too with my dogs. "Did you have a good day? Did you get 'being a dog' checked off your to-do list? You did! What a productive day!"

Problem!
Jan 1, 2007

I am the queen of France.
I also instruct my dogs to be good when I leave. Then I stop by the chinchilla cages and tell them "you especially."

I tell them when I'm coming back too, because obviously they can read clocks.

Problem!
Jan 1, 2007

I am the queen of France.

TunaSpleen posted:

"Poop Fiesta" comes from every time I look under furniture to find 4,350,376,092 chin turds underneath and loudly exclaim "Jesus! It's a poop fiesta down here!"

This happens weekly, I am not a slob, she just poops CONSTANTLY.

Both my chinchillas only get a small handful of food a day plus however much hay they want to stuff their faces with. The amount of resulting poop is astounding.

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