WWE Discussion is Wyatt's Hex, Segment Trainwrecks, & Broken Necks for 5/12

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Hammer House: Stinger Splash Zone > WWE Discussion is Wyatt's Hex, Segment Trainwrecks, & Broken Necks for 5/12

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STING 64: Oct 20, 2006

Payback - Chicago, IL (June 1st, 8:00PM EST)

The Matches:

John Cena vs Bray Wyatt - Last Man Standing
The Shield vs Evolution - Warg Games Match: Each team member will have a pet wolf. They will be tasked with grooming and training these animals to the best of their ability, before shipping them off to shelters across the nation should they fail.

WWE SmackDown!

WWE Monday Night Raw

Shield comes out to cut a promo. After Reigns finishes talking, a limosine appears on the Tron. Immediately, Shield bails out of the ring to intercept them backstage, breaking out into an all out brawl.
Swagger vs RVD is up next. Before the match could get underway, Colter comes out to talk about how people like Adam Rose need to be deported. Adam Rose and his Entourage come to ringside, and distract Swagger. The match underway, RVD kicks a distracted Swagger and picks up the win with the Five Star.
Paige vs Alicia Fox. Alicia talks about how Paige just doesn't fit in, and needs to get out. She jumps Paige, but is still beaten in their match. Afterwards, she throws a tantrum, tearing up the announcer's table and stealing JBL's hat.
Bryan comes out, and talks about how he's loved winning the WWE Title. He talks about how once he won it though, he had the largest target on his head. He's been attacked, menaced, and he's paid for it with his body. He mentions he needs neck surgery this week, and his career is at risk, but promises he will come back.
Cena & The Usos b The Wyatt Family in a good six man match.
Evolution in the ring start to talk about how it's time for the kids gloves to come off. It's time to humble The Shield. When Triple H is starting to say Believe In Evolution, they're all jumped by The Shield. After a scuffle in which Evolution gets away, Batista demands a match with Roman Reigns for tonight.
Natalya vs Nikki Bella is next. Before the match, a clip from Total Divas is shown, with Natalya giving Nikki a painting as a gift. It's pretty terrible, and Nikki isn't exactly appreciative. Nikki wins after a creative rollup. The other Divas outside the ring hold up signs with 10s on them. Natalya upset gets in Cameron's face over it. I have no idea who the face or heel in all of this is. Yeesh.
Rybaxel come to the ring in matching hats. Neither of them can decide who faces Sheamus, so they flip a coin. Curtis wins. Then, Curtis loses. Afterwads, Ryback jumps Sheamus to face him. After a more competitive match, he in matching fashion also loses. Sheamus double wins!! Yay!
Sheamus vs Cesaro on Main Event tomorrow!
Stephanie talks about how unfortunate it is Bryan is hurt. She says he must be as hurt as he is because he isn't an A+ player, and just isn't good enough. She asks him to come down to ringside because she has something important to say to him. Kane's music suddenly hits, and he drags Daniel onto the stage. Bryan is quickly stretchered out.
Fandango vs Santin...oh, it's actually Dolph Ziggler! I guess that feud is over. Dolph wins here after a distraction from Layla. Afterwards, Fandango declares his love for Layla and they make out.
Hacksaw Jim Duggan comes out to talk about Legends House, but is interrupted by Lana and Rusev. Rusev now comes from Russia and also loves Putin. Lana gives him the chance to beg for mercy. He refuses, and Rusev kills his closest friend plank in response. Rusev is about to attack Duggan when Big E runs down for the ave, only to get his rear end kicked for his attempted chivalry. The ill booked Rusev vs Black People feud continues on!
Sandow comes out, talking about how he's been censored by the company. He's about to drop a pipebomb when he's interrupted by The Rhodes Brothers music to face Cody Rhodes. Cody wins after a rake to the eyes and a disaster kick.
Bray Wyatt appears in the darkness, and challenges Cena to a Last Man Standing match at Payback.
Roman Reigns vs Batista turns into a farce when Shield and Evolution wind up brawling again. Shield have the upper hand, but then Stephanie McMahon comes to her husband's rescue by sending the entire Heel Roster run down to take them out. Triple H goes to hit Reigns with a chair, but Roman plows through everyone and spears Triple H. Shield then annihilates the entire heel roster on their own, hitting their moves on everybody. They Triple Powerbomb Ryback and send a message to Evolution as Raw goes off the air: Believe in the Shield.

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Other useful links

WWE Network
NXT Discussion
Link to WWE Network General Discussion
If you're poor as heck this will give you cheap poo poo to eat.
Link to WWE Network Live Events Discussion

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# ? May 13, 2014 04:04

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# ? May 16, 2024 05:25

Bard Maddox: Feb 15, 2012; I'm just a sick guy, I'm really just a dirty guy.

Dogshit Raw. Good ending.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:05

Sir Jebus: Feb 9, 2010; The only hero left for man is weed.

Bard Maddox posted:

Dogshit Raw. Good ending.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:06

Daniel Bryan: May 23, 2006; GOAT

Turned it off after the first hour. Sounds like I didn't miss anything.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:06

Liar Lyre: Jun 3, 2011; Here to deliver
~Bad Opinions~

ALICIA HAS NOT QUIT! I REPEAT, ALICIA HAS NOT QUIT!

# ? May 13, 2014 04:06

HulkaMatt: Feb 14, 2006; BIG BICEPS SHOHEI

That RAW physically and emotionally drained me. The Shield are still great though.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:06

Thauros: Jan 29, 2003

Well, that sucked unless the Shield and/or Evolution was onscreen, but those parts continue to be cool at least.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:07

oatgan: Jan 15, 2009

Nick Hogan made a song https://soundcloud.com/djnickhogan/drat

# ? May 13, 2014 04:07

Solomonic: Jan 3, 2008; INCIPIT SANTA

Bard Maddox posted:

Dogshit Raw. Good ending.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:08

GenericMartini: Oct 22, 2012; AYYYYY PAPI

Oh good Alicia is still around, at least we didn't lose all hope.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:08

Call Me Charlie: Dec 3, 2005; by Smythe

It felt like that Raw was booked by throwing darts at a board.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:08

Cornwind Evil: Dec 14, 2004; The undisputed world champion of wrestling effortposting

Cue thirty pages of Bryan complaints, the man has an injured neck. This potentially provides an out for the Kane feud and might give him someone new to feud with when he gets back.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:08

Fiveace Attorney: Dec 12, 2006; I ain't his friend! If you were to ask me if I was his friend, I would say "NO" to you!

Wrestlemans are not that good right now

# ? May 13, 2014 04:09

MotU: Mar 6, 2007; It was like she was evicting walking garbage.; Pillbug

Fiveace Attorney posted:

Wrestlemans are not that good right now

Wrestlemans good, wrestlestories bad

# ? May 13, 2014 04:09

Luigi Thirty: Apr 30, 2006; Emergency confection port.

Call Me Charlie posted:

It felt like that Raw was booked by throwing darts at a board.

Apparently it was one of those Raws rewritten until the last minute because of the Bryan injury.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:10

Bumper Stickup: Jan 7, 2012; Mmm... Offshore Toast!; Grimey Drawer

I want Natalia to go whole hog with this angle and make bad paintings of everyone.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:10

NickRoweFillea: Sep 27, 2012; doin thangs

Fiveace Attorney posted:

Wrestlemans are not that good right now

but The Shield

# ? May 13, 2014 04:10

oatgan: Jan 15, 2009

daniel bryan is a quitter

# ? May 13, 2014 04:10

SamuraiFoochs: Jan 16, 2007; Grimey Drawer

Daniel Bryan posted:

Turned it off after the first hour. Sounds like I didn't miss anything.

You missed The Best Ending.

Worried about Bryan

# ? May 13, 2014 04:10

Fiveace Attorney: Dec 12, 2006; I ain't his friend! If you were to ask me if I was his friend, I would say "NO" to you!

NickRoweFillea posted:

but The Shield

the shield is always good. i cannot envision a world where the shield is bad

# ? May 13, 2014 04:10

Liar Lyre: Jun 3, 2011; Here to deliver
~Bad Opinions~

GenericMartini posted:

Oh good Alicia is still around, at least we didn't lose all hope.

Seriously, that was probably the hypest I have been for a Divas match ever. Legit highlight of the night was Alicia goddamned Fox.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:11

Blasmeister: Jan 15, 2012; 2Time TRP Sack Race Champion

Fibby Boy posted:

I want Natalia to go whole hog with this angle and make bad paintings of everyone.

Then break the painting of her opponent over her knee before the match.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:11

I Before E: Jul 2, 2012

The Shield have good matches, but this Evolution feud has not progressed at all in recent weeks. It's always "they do a thing, it becomes a schmozz, one side is left standing" every week, and it's kind of boring.

Also Raw was real bad and Adam Rose is garbage and sucks.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:11

achillesforever6: Apr 23, 2012; psst you wanna do a communism?

Call Me Charlie posted:

It felt like that Raw was booked by throwing darts at a board.

Well I think Bryan getting his neck broke did screw things up, now granted it would just continue a dogshit Kane feud, but it would have probably ended at Payback. Hopefully Bryan is okay so he can end that feud and help salvage his title reign.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:11

Strawberry Panda: Nov 4, 2007; Breakfast Defecting, Slow Dick Touching, Root Beer Barreling SwagVP

Shield has made HHH, Randy Orton and Batista the best part of Raw.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:11

Writer Cath: Apr 1, 2007; Box. Flipped.; Plaster Town Cop

HulkaMatt posted:

That RAW physically and emotionally drained me. The Shield are still great though.

It's amazing how they've managed to stay fresh and consistently entertaining.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:12

X-O: Apr 28, 2002; Long Live The King!

So Sheamus is wrestling Cesaro on Main Event tomorrow? Well that's an certain watch now.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:12

achillesforever6: Apr 23, 2012; psst you wanna do a communism?

oatgan posted:

daniel bryan is a quitter

Less of a quitter than his role model though

# ? May 13, 2014 04:12

Prozach: Oct 30, 2013; When God invented Lycra, he was thinking about Divas matches.

Alicia Fox was cool, and The Shield are still cool, but there's a lot of dumb in general going on lately.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:14

Daniel Bryan: May 23, 2006; GOAT

SamuraiFoochs posted:

You missed The Best Ending.

Worried about Bryan

To me, and I could be way off, this isn't all that bad of an injury and they're expecting him back real soon. But the half-retirement speech was a way to add that extra bit of doubt into your heads.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:15

oatgan: Jan 15, 2009

achillesforever6 posted:

Less of a quitter than his role model though

Chris Benoit was wrestling all that weekend though? Like right up until the hour he was murdered.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:15

Shard: Jul 30, 2005

An alright Raw that can be summed up as: The Shield are the best. Can we give them a title run with Freebird rules?

# ? May 13, 2014 04:15

NickRoweFillea: Sep 27, 2012; doin thangs

gotta give it up to Haitch, he made Daniel Bryan look like a million bucks and makes the Shield look like a jillion bucks

# ? May 13, 2014 04:15

DeathChicken: Jul 9, 2012; Nonsense. I have not yet begun to defile myself.

That Bray promo was awesome.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:17

Luigi Thirty: Apr 30, 2006; Emergency confection port.

Fibby Boy posted:

I want Natalia to go whole hog with this angle and make bad paintings of everyone.

Blasmeister posted:

Then break the painting of her opponent over her knee before the match.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:17

SamuraiFoochs: Jan 16, 2007; Grimey Drawer

Daniel Bryan posted:

To me, and I could be way off, this isn't all that bad of an injury and they're expecting him back real soon. But the half-retirement speech was a way to add that extra bit of doubt into your heads.

You are more than likely correct but neck injuries are always bad news bears.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:17

Dexo: Aug 15, 2009; A city that was to live by night after the wilderness had passed. A city that was to forge out of steel and blood-red neon its own peculiar wilderness.

NickRoweFillea posted:

gotta give it up to Haitch, he made Daniel Bryan look like a million bucks and makes the Shield look like a jillion bucks

His head just keeps finding its way into Rollins flying fist or knee.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:18

Bumper Stickup: Jan 7, 2012; Mmm... Offshore Toast!; Grimey Drawer

Blasmeister posted:

Then break the painting of her opponent over her knee before the match.

Give her Rusev's music. But replace the RUSEV (words) with NATALIA (words).

# ? May 13, 2014 04:18

DeathChicken: Jul 9, 2012; Nonsense. I have not yet begun to defile myself.

Ambrose is totally Rowdy Roddy Piper on downers instead of coke.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:20

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# ? May 16, 2024 05:25

Blasmeister: Jan 15, 2012; 2Time TRP Sack Race Champion

Someone needs to adjust Ambrose's dosage.

# ? May 13, 2014 04:21

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Hammer House: Stinger Splash Zone > WWE Discussion is Wyatt's Hex, Segment Trainwrecks, & Broken Necks for 5/12

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