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joke_explainer


Bwee posted:

i have a much shittier sous vide machine that requires a crock pot but it works really really well and it's my favorite kitchen device

It is pretty amazing... I was inspired to get one after Goatdrugs explained how he built his sous vide cooker, which was awesome. But then I was lazy and just bought an automatic one. It has this app:



which lets you set temperature, time, etc remotely via bluetooth, it also will give you updates and alarms to your phone. So I don't have to take a break from posting to go check on dinner. It's also got thousands of recipes (many user submitted, though there's grading) that you can just hit 'play' on and it will take the temp / time setting from the recipes.

Vacuum-packed steak ready for the water bath:

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joke_explainer


All done with it. Overall it turned out great. I also did step-by-step for roast brussel sprouts w/ balsamic vinegar but I left them in the oven to stay warm (at a reduced temp, but it was still pretty hot) and they got overcooked. drat.



Checked the water temperature to make sure it was accurate: Seemed good.



Had a beer, because a huge steak isn't enough calories I guess...



Out of the water bath about 1 hr 30 minutes @ 127 degrees, doesn't look too appetizing in the bag.



The stove is still kind of a wreck atm but, cast iron, heat it up as hot as it gets w/ canola oil, add butter and throw the steak on as soon as the butter starts to brown.

Only about a minute aside. It's very smoky, helps it you have a vent hood for your stove (which I don't) but at least open a window.



Flipped this side too early, but oh well, it still ended up good.



Steak with overcooked brussel sprouts, after about 3 minutes rest (doesn't need as much resting from sous vide). A very brown meal. I'd do something different next time as a side for sure.



Perfect medium rare edge to edge.



It's incredibly hard to do this so evenly and perfect throughout the entire steak manually. Sous vide made it almost a guarantee. Every piece of the steak throughout was exactly the same level of "done".



My cat hopped up on the table wondering what the gently caress I was doing with all the pictures. She never does that. She was very curious about the meat though. (I gave her a tiny piece later, but didn't want to reinforce table jumping just then...)

Overall I love this method of cooking. It was way too much food for one person but the great thing about it is how easy it is to scale; you can cook an awful lot of stuff in a water bath at once to the exact same level consistently. You can do the same thing without the fancy cooker with a cooler and a thermometer and a little babysitting, but this Anova cooker makes it really easy. Definitely recommend it if you have an interest in sous vide. Next thing I make with it will actually benefit more from a long, slow cook time.

joke_explainer


meteloides posted:

that's a delicious looking steak, and a very cute cat. I wonder if Anova has an Android version of their app. I'd have to find someplace for the setup to live when I'm not using it, though.

Seems there's two unofficial apps to use with it on android. There's also controls on the unit as well.

The unit itself is small and works with about any pot. I just used the dough tub because its big and transparent but the actual machine is pretty small.

joke_explainer


update: I had leftover steak and eggs for breakfast and it was really good.

joke_explainer


wow that site is awesome. Yeah I'm in love with sous vide. Gonna sous vide some eggs in the morning to spite BYOB's strict boiled egg ruling regime

joke_explainer


Bo-Pepper posted:

look if you're doing them on the stove top there's just one way is the point

I know and I agree : ) I just remember the angry threads about it

joke_explainer


landy. posted:

does that include deviled? I was thinking of trying deviled.

¡Dios mío! Steer clear of the huevos del diablo!

joke_explainer


Bo-Pepper posted:

draining for half an hour is way way too long like i don't even understand what that means it's like talking about how long ago the big bang was like you can give me numbers but my mind can't really comprehend its meaning

lol yeah thus is mind boggling. You finish your noodles, then go watch a tv show or sonerhung, then finish the less time sensitive stuff? :shrug: Next time get your sauce or w/e ready before hand since it can probably sit at a low temperature a bit longer without being ruined.

Bo-Pepper posted:

also i don't know how similar asian noodle cooking is to pasta cooking but using pasta that still has a good bit of starchy cooking water on them is often a key part to binding the other liquid ingredients into a silky sauce like if you were to drain pasta and then rinse it with water afterwards somewhere an italian grandmother gets cancer

Yeah. Don't rinse them off...

Or if you have to (like cold water b/c they are going to overcook) save some starchy water to splash them with right before mixing

joke_explainer


om nom nom posted:

That is a loving gorgeous sear man you are hired.

I also just noticed my autocorrect capitalizes loving I like it

Thanks! Yeah the crust was crispy and great and it was certainly the best steak I've ever made. Too bad about the brussel sprouts.


That's beautiful. I'd love to try something like that. I don't think I've ever had farrow.


om nom nom posted:

I didn't mean to write a book Im sorry everyone

don't be sorry, I love long posts, especially in the food thread

joke_explainer


om nom nom posted:

I wasn't going to mention the Brussels haha. But in a French brigade there are separate vegetable and meat cooks so there is hope yet.

What else have you tried in that sous vide aside from steak?

One problem is just its kind of out of season so they're tiny and varied in size a lot. They actually looked pretty good at first: Still green with lightly browned edges, cooked throughout, but then I realized they finished way longer than I thought they would, so I let the oven cool a bit then put them back in to keep warm. I guess it was still way too hot in there, because they came out lifeless and way overcooked. Plus garlic wasn't really great with them, shallots would have been better. Something to remember next time I guess.

I made 2 eggs soft boiled at exactly 150 degrees that ended up with beautiful set but orange and gooey yolks and smeared them on toast for breakfast, but thats the only other thing so far. I'm trying to decide what to make when my sister visits next week. I figured going for something that really benefits from the long, low temperature thing but haven't decided what to do yet.

joke_explainer


I'll just buy some to keep you from having to mail 20 different yobbers who are staring at their bank accounts with -1.20$ and got 16$ available on one credit card and are trying to figure out how they are going to afford to pick up GTA V this month and eat when their eyes light up at that.

joke_explainer


Alright, I'm in I guess. The first Ingredient Challenge of the BYOB Fine Dining Effortpost Funhouse... Landy vs Bo Pepper vs Securitydrone. Profiles of our BYOB iron chefs:

Landy: Recently became vegetarian, no real cooking experience

Securitydrone: Lots of kitchen gadgets, doesn't really know what he's doing

Bo Pepper: Like two decades of working in a commercial kitchen

joke_explainer


I'd use a baking dish or dutch oven or something.

Make your crumble filling wihh butter, cinnamon, oats, flour, salt, brown sugar, whateve else you want. Roll the the apples before you put them in melted butter, sugar, brown sugar a little salt and cinnamon. I'm sure the filling was good, that looks fine I guess, just you need some kind of oil for heat transfer on the outside of the apples.

I like the skin on approach, they’d crisp up nicely I think. Put them in the pre-heated oven (in a dutch oven that set in the oven preferably), pour about a cup of apple juice in there, then bake for about an hour with the lid on. Then remove the lid and top with your crumble and bake at 450 until the topping is brown, 15-20 minutes. Remove and let it rest for a while to cool down, butter and sugar can get really hot. Having no kind of container meant everything is just going everywhere on your baking dish so that should help. Good luck!

joke_explainer


Oh, I would slit the skins though, score them all around before rolling them in the melted butter / sugar mixture. It looks like the intact skins burst at some point ejecting and deflating your soft apples.

joke_explainer


Agree w/ Bo Pepper, though I think slitting it will let the sugar/butter get in the nooks and crannies and make it overall more delicious at the end. but who knows. I'm just guessing here.

joke_explainer


the farmers market is only awesome may to november though anyway

joke_explainer


i flunked out posted:

maybe where u are...

Eh, there's some good stuff there in the off season but the main reason I go there is for the crazy spring summer early autumn produce. Until you've had spicy fresh carrots from the farmer's market you haven't tasted carrots, drat.

joke_explainer


*into reality TV cam* We're all already winners but I'm going to reach into science to find the means to destroy Bo-Pepper.

joke_explainer


The Farro arrived!

I am still testing.

joke_explainer


Also thanks on nom nom for my new gem thief name: Jaques Explainiêr

joke_explainer


I can make something resembling flour with this stuff, but I'm worried I'll get points taken off if I don't strongly represent the base ingredient in the final product... still, the appeal of providing a baked side from this ancient grain is strong, though it'd have to be cut with regular flour and some experimentation would be needed.

joke_explainer


Hmm... I really need a digital waffle maker...

joke_explainer


That looks so good. I love slow-cooked short ribs with a nice sear on them.

joke_explainer


om nom nom posted:

Great posts, can't wait to see what else you do alnilam.

Bo I might take that dish and sell it in the restaurant. Maybe some changes but I like the braised beef and farro situation you have going on.

What is the function of salting the meat and leaving it out? I've never done that before.

Its sort of like a micro-dry brine... It helps season the interior of the meat slightly I think, water is sucked out, the the liquid gets reabsorbed into the less-moist now steak. Here in the salting section of this article from serious eats:

http://www.seriouseats.com/2011/03/the-food-lab-more-tips-for-perfect-steaks.html

joke_explainer


Bo-Pepper posted:

For a straight steak it's compulsory.

:agreed:

I get nicer crusts and general improvements all around. also I love rolling the sides of the steak in the accumulated salt and pepper from seasoning it.

joke_explainer


om nom nom posted:

I've done the room temperature thing, just never salted it first, always right before it gets cooked. I'll have to try that out

I don't notice any real difference in the room temperature thing, but the salt thing, definitely.

joke_explainer


I couldn't get the bat to fly overhead so the experience was incomplete... this recipe is hard...

Great looking salad though alnilam!

joke_explainer


I just finished my first dish. I thought it was going to be a total disaster. It did take a lot longer than I was guessing... I don't know if it's the farro or what, but the dough just seemed to take forever to get elastic / smooth. Anyway. I'll upload photos and give the whole deal in the morning.

Edit: Yeah it's 1:00 in the morning here. I just finished dinner.

joke_explainer


meteloides posted:

I've decided that when I get paid, I'm gonna hunt around and find a good farro supplier. This is clearly a wonder grain, and anything that fills you up and keeps you full is a-ok in my book.

These recipes all look so good ahhhh. The braised short ribs look amazing, and that salad looks delicious, alnilam, and I don't even like cucumber. landy, I feel like you need more food photography practice, but that's ok because I do too.

I'm sure you'll love it. I made pasta... I'm not super experienced at it, but its basically the most toothsome pasta I've ever had. I was thinking it would be kind of crunchy like the grain, but instead it's just got a modified texture. It's really good, just needs experimentation to figure out the water / ground farro / real flour ratio that works best.

joke_explainer


Very well wrapped. Thanks om nom nom.





Total weight: 673 grams.



Turns out my grain mill attachment is broken, so I just fed some bread through my old burr coffee grinder until it seemed to stop having coffee grains and then it was farro grinding time.



Looks pretty interesting first time through, but definitely not fine enough:



2nd time through it looks better. I think I should have put it through again, or used an actual grain mill in the future.



Flour cut 50/50 with regular AP.



Eggs.



I took 5 yolks and 1 whole egg. To seperate egg yolks from egg whites, just transfer them back and forth between halves of the shell. (Sorry the photos aren't more illustrative, it's hard to take photos of stuff when you need to use both hands).





A little oil in cast iron.



Throw a bunch of basil and spinach on there. (Should be about as much by weight as your flour: The farro though seems to have changed the dynamic though. More on that later.) Make sure you wash your greens (and preferably dry them with a salad spinner or something) before this. Remove the stems if you want, it's going into the food processor anyway but it's nice to if you aren't lazy.



Stir it around some.



You're waiting for it to just start to 'wilt' and for the color to look a bit more vibrant, like this:



Now throw all that in the food processor.



Squeeze some lemon in there.



Puree. A vitamix would probably be better here. This is the cuisinart mini-prep, a tiny little food processor that is helpful and easier to clean than the 12-cup one.



Yeah ok.

I topped it off with water to get close to 10 ounces, which I think was a huge mistake. My dough was nothing like I was expecting at first. Next time I will try it without adding any additional water.



So, then I probably made another mistake. According to pasta-making tradition, you're supposed to make a mound of the dry ingredients on the counter, then make a well in it, then dump your liquid / eggs in that well, and slowly incorporate it with a fork. I thought, why not just do it in a dough tub? Well, I guess one big reason is it's hard to incorporate stuff from the sides; you can just use a bench knife on the counter to keep folding your ingredients over top of themselves.



At this point I was pretty confused and annoyed. Was not coming together.



Had some chocolate.



And a beer.



So I added some flour and kept kneading it. It was a mess. Very wet doughs are incredibly sticky to start with. You can either flour your hand or wet your hand in warm water and that will keep your hands from sticking for a few manipulations of a dough but obviously you're transferring more water to it. I had wanted to knead it by hand, but my hands got tired.



Almost looks right. It should be more smooth and elastic. I don't know if I just didn't need it enough or what. I worked it over a bit more on the counter now that it had more or less became a ball of dough.



Rolled it out to roughly the right size for the pasta roller.



It went through the pasta roller beautifully and I thinned it into a huge long sheet.



Then I should have just cut the noodles with my knife. It would have ended up better. It was not the right texture to go through the cutter. It was a mess, the noodles were awful looking. They look like the remains of a hideous monster on the drying rack:



Whatever. It's 1:00 AM. Had to stay late at work then spent waaay too long trying to get that dough perfect. I boil them. Fresh pasta boils VERY QUICKLY, so have everything else ready.



Fennel spicy italian sausage, lots and lots of freshly microplaned parmesan, some butter, radishes, spring onions and parsley.



Sorry to end it all on a terrible photo but it was actually very delicious pasta, somehow. I had big plans for fancy plating but at this point I was like 'UGH, lemme eat this so I can get to bed.'

I guess the dough was alright after all, just not too suitable for the cutter. If I had just thinned it more and cut it with the knife, I think it would have looked a lot better. Hopefully I can debug the dough for next time I did it. This is under 1/4th the noodles the recipe makes; I vacuum sealed and froze the rest of the dough as that's way more noodles than I need at the moment so we'll see how it holds up later I guess.

The farro definitely changes the end result of the pasta in an interesting way. My hypothesis when I started was that the crunchiness of the would show up in the end pasta, hopefully in a good way. It doesn't at all, but the texture of the pasta is firmer in a really good way. It's definitely noticeable and still pretty filling. Thanks om nom nom for the very interesting grain!

joke_explainer


Thank you om nom nom for the gift of farro, and the general contest idea. I look forward to using this ancient grain in the future. Gonna do this one for brunch some day this week: http://www.bonappetit.com/recipe/fried-farro-with-pickled-carrots-and-runny-eggs

joke_explainer


Bo-Pepper: Is my cutting board ok

joke_explainer


Bo-Pepper posted:

it is very nice likely better than mine also i appreciate the seasoning on your cast iron pan

Thank you! I actually ordered it in response to your post on end grain cutting boards. It's certainly not a top tier one (I think yours looks like a John Boos or some other even nicer brand; the really large end grain pieces look great to me) but I think it's one of the few things I've ever bought for my kitchen that I have never regretted. It holds together so well and maintaining it is oddly satisfying.

That is my favorite pan, I like it better than the all-clad stuff. It's really dialed in on the seasoning. The key to seasoning those things is really just frequent use (and a metal spatula, which a lot of people avoid because of non-stick cookware but I couldn't ever not have a big flat metal spatula in my kitchen). Also animal fat helps a lot somehow.

joke_explainer


Bo-Pepper posted:

possibly you can look at the bottom of the pan and it will tell you but honestly it's the sort of cooking tool fetishism i've never gotten too deep into

They're great pans, Griswold and Wagner, but yeah. Lodge pans work just as well after sufficient seasoning. And I'd still be upset if one of them got ruined somehow but I wouldn't be completely devastated like losing a 1905 Griswold. (Though, even then you can just sand the outer surface off and start over with any cast iron basically.)

I think Lodge would be just as good if they stopped putting their 'pre-seasoning' gunk on them and just shipped bare metal, but I guess they worry about people who don't know what they're doing.

joke_explainer


om nom nom posted:

This is a bad method for cooking a steak if you aren't one for perfectly rested medium rare piece of beef.

This is a polite way of saying, "if you hate things that taste good". Looks amazing om nom nom. I think I'll do a bernaise next time... 7.99 a pound too, that's crazy.

Also yeah Plugra is great, that's the butter I generally get. (I think I have some kerrygold in the fridge right now for some reason though. It's good but not worth the markup compared to plugra).

joke_explainer


Do you suffer from Morning Hunger? Waking up, wanting to eat, and not knowing what to do? What if I told you there could be a technique that would solve this problem for you? You'd call me crazy right?

Well, I'm not crazy, and lucky for you, there is in fact a solution. Make an egg scramble. It's easy and fast. I made one this morning with mushrooms, shallots, scallions, garlic (optional but good) and parmesan/cheddar. Some people don't like cheese on their eggs. I find this works well: Just cheddar is too sharp and overpowers other stuff and just parmesan tastes weird, but mix them both and its pretty good.



First assemble your mise. Clean and slice up mushrooms, should have about 12 crimini's worth or so depending on the size. Two big heaping handfuls. Grate your cheese, tiny holes for the parmesan and medium holes for the cheddar. Just a small handful is all you need. Thinly slice those shallots, dice garlic, and break 3 eggs and mix them up in a cup or small bowl. Section out a few tablespoons of butter, it does take a bit. Not pictured: The large chunk of butter and the finely diced garlic, and the cup with the eggs in it, ugh, I did a bad job photographing the stuff you need. For stuff like this I don't microplane the garlic.

Put the burner on medium-high heat or so. Stovetops are kind of different so you want the butter to be melting and bubbling up quickly. Throw the mushrooms on there and toss them to coat with butter, keep them moving around the pan a bit.



They start to look really delicious fast, just a couple minutes or even less. Add some freshly ground black pepper and kosher salt. Then add the scallions, stir to mix into the bunch of cooking ingredients. Reduce heat slightly.



Make a well in the center and toss the egg in there, maybe melt a little extra butter first if you think it needs but it probably doesn't.



Do not take pictures at this part. You need to integrate the ingredients into the egg mixture.



Good enough.

Smoosh it down so it's flatter and covers more of the pan, makes it easier to portion and split.



Cut it along the middle with your spatula and flip both halves.



Should be a less browned than this. Eggs are best when cooked gently. I was distracted with the whole photo taking though.

I reduce heat more after just like a minute on the other side, flip, and gently set the grated cheese on top. It melts in about a minute, and then all the egg inside will be firm. Otherwise take it off heat immediately, the heat from the other ingredients will soften the cheese anyway.



Add a little more black pepper and a little more salt and sprinkle those scallions on there and it's ready to go, two delicious portions of mushroom-shallot-scallion-garlic scramble.

Bonus pic: After you're turn, your cast iron should look like this with just a couple swipes of a kitchen towel. Cast iron is pretty amazing at cooking eggs.

joke_explainer


How are those photos anyway? Was hoping for some feedback. I think I'm hitting on as good as I can get with my lovely phone camera, but not sure if I want to go for a DSLR yet tho I'm sure I'd find more use than just food.

joke_explainer


landy. posted:

I thought you actually used a camera

I was aiming for that look, but its mostly lightroom trickery. Thank you. I want to get better at it tho.

joke_explainer


Use firm tofu, then use paper towels I guess to dry the tofu. Once you've taken as much moisture as it practical out of it, add those in a bag and seal the tofu up. Should work great. Then pan fry the tofu the next day or so. Should absorb a ton of the flavors. This would work for eggplant too, though not as well as tofu.

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joke_explainer


om nom nom posted:

And you can press the water out of tofu by putting it between 2 pans and weigh it down with cans or something and leaving it in the fridge over night

Yeah this is highly recommended as well. Anything to get the water out of the tofu, which you'll then replace with your tofu marinade or whatever you want to call it


morning wood posted:

hey BP have you ever done a cooking thread on low effort bachelor/bachelorette style cooking? the stuff itt looks tasty but is a whole lot of effort and food for one person. if you have recipes that involve throwing some random poo poo into a crockpot and coming home to a culinary delight that would be right up my alley.

my scramble post was pretty low effort... here's a slow cooker recipe from a while back http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3656838&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=5#post433750178

everyone should browse this whole thread periodically, there's some amazing stuff, and, uh, also alnilam's seitan post. :confused:

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