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This is an interesting and relevant thread for me. I've been disabled all my life with high functioning autism, terrible anxiety and depression. I can't spend five minutes with two other people without getting tense, I can't answer the phone reliably, schedule changes at the last moment make me burst into fits, etc. I didn't get on disability until my early 20s because nobody in my family knew, and no one outside it ever tried to help us. My parents did their best to raise a disabled child, but I was their first and they had no experience, so when a social worked finally told us that we should apply for SSI/SSDI it was basically a complete shock along the lines of "We could do that?" To echo all of the other statements, it's a mess. I was lucky enough to be living at home still when we tried, so I had supportive family keeping me alive for the two years or whatever it took. I was turned down the first time, but after that my mental health car provide put forth her absolute best for the appeal. (This woman has probably almost literally saved my life several times in all the work she's done.) I was lucky because of her and didn't have to get a lawyer, but that was a hail Mary that kept it from happening. Waiting for those long periods to find out if I could ever receive support past my parents sure didn't help my panic attacks, I'll tell you that. I would love to work. I would love to find something I can manage and maybe eventually work my way off Social Security. Social Security sends me robo-calls about their Ticket to Work program. They sure are strict, though. There were a couple time in the past few years that I tried menial jobs. It never lasted more than a month or two due to the disabilities, but god dammit I wanted to try. I don't want to be a leech. (Not implying all welfare is leeching here, just mean that I would much rather support myself if I at all could.) Then months later I got letters saying I owed the government money over the couple hundred dollars I managed to make and they would be cutting it out of my future checks. Now, apparently part of this is that you're supposed to report income as it happens, but this is another case of "No one ever loving told me." Then there are those caps on how much money you can have, so even if I could slowly work into a part time job I can't actually save it up. I mean, sure I could keep a box of cash in my closet, but that's terrible for any number of reasons and can you imagine what would happen if Social Security somehow found out? I get about $1200 a month now that I've been classified as an adult disabled child or whatever. 700 goes to rent, another 100-150 (depending on electric bill) to my utilities. So I have about 300 dollars a month to feed/clothe/everything else myself. I make due, and I'm glad to have it, but there's very little breathing room and there's no way I can ever support having a car or a pet. If there was some sort of sudden emergency expense I would probably be royally boned. I live in constant fear of them saying I'm not disabled, and while I'd love to work I basically can't do it without shooting myself in the foot. I'm thankful to have SSDI, don't get me wrong. I wish I could try to learn a trade and eventually wean myself, but the system seems set up to prevent that from ever happening. Sorry if this is just a big E/N dump. I find this topic interesting and this is basically the first time I've ever told the internet about the struggle because I'm scared to death of how people could react. I can be eloquent, I can type and hold a conversation if I don't panic out, so a lot of people will think I'm not disabled, and I don't want to try and fight that pointless fight. A discussion I've had is that in some ways it's easier if you're blind or missing a leg or something than with mental health, though as posts upthread have shown it's still not anything like a free pass. With some mental health situations though, there's nothing to "show" unless you start hyperventilating at an interview. My advice for people in similar situations who are applying is this: Play up the bad. I'm not saying lie. Don't say things happen to you that don't. Fill out every form, answer every interview question as if it's one of your worst days, not an average one. Don't try to be optimistic. Paint as bleak a picture as you truthfully can. They can and will take any good thing you say as proof that you're not disabled.
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Sep 5, 2014 12:14
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| # ¿ May 16, 2024 11:33 |
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