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Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves

anilEhilated posted:

Yeah, clearly it's not about complexity or, y'know, being an RPG. God forbid someone have a different opinion.

People don't appreciate art man.

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GrandTheftAutism
Dec 24, 2013

by Fluffdaddy
Chapter II: The Club At The End Of The Street



It's just past midnight when the siltstrider lumbers into the north side of Balmora.



After getting directions from a nearby Argonian, I drag my tired rear end to the South Wall Corner Club on Labor Street. Unfortunately there are no street signs, but the rest of the directions are enough to help me find my way there without too much trouble.



There's a merchant in the entryway who isn't too friendly towards orcs, but is nonetheless willing to serve me and buy my odds and ends.



I ask the bartender about this Bacola Closcius fellow I'm supposed to see. Turns out he owns the place. Maybe Caius Cosades is one of his regulars.



LOL what a name.



Bacola Closcius is upstairs, near the terrace. I rent a bed from him for the night and get directions to find Cosades without any fuss.



SLEEEEEEEEP. It's been an eventful day.



It's well past daybreak by the time I leave the club. Thankfully, that means the stores should be open and Caius Cosades is out of bed. If not, I can always drag him out with one hand.



Found the place well enough, but he smells worse than most loving orcs. Seriously, I've known chieftains who bathed more regularly than this guy.



A new life in the Emperor's Secret Service? Sign me up!



Oh, don't worry, I have no intention of touching your belongings. I'm not your maid. Tell me about these trainers?



All right then. Goodbye.



With that done, I poke around Balmora for a little while, rummaging through crates and finding some remarkably valuable things inside. No-one gives me a second glance when I take any of it, either.



All right, crunch time. Let's see how good I am at alchemy.




Huh? Where'd it go?



Ohhh, I see. The name only comes up if the two ingredients have matching effects. It's kind of like Skyrim, where you discover mixtures through trial and error (and a fuckload of wasted ingredients).



:whoptc:



YOU ARE making GBS threads ME. :cmon:



Finally, after several attempts, I get a small bottle of Restore Fatigue. MY FIRST POTION, BITCHES :drugnerd:



Time to go shopping.



That's nice. Something to enchant later.



drat it. Oh well, if you won't sell me spells, someone else will.



EXCELLENT. I also got a fancy new robe from the local clothier, as you can see on the left.



I paid a visit to the Dunmer temple hoping to replenish my magicka, but sadly the saints' shines were no help.



What do you think? Very nice, no?


Finally I headed back to my suite at the Cornerclub and pondered my options:

  1. Head back to Seyda Neen
  2. Train here in Balmora
  3. Travel to Ald'ruhn
  4. Travel to Caldera
  5. Go randomly adventuring and rack up experience that way
  6. Do something else (please specify)

First option to reach five votes wins. Tune in next time for another exciting chapter of Let's Play Morrowind!

GrandTheftAutism fucked around with this message at 08:36 on Oct 3, 2014

Scaly Haylie
Dec 25, 2004

There are a few well-paying quests in and around Seyda Neen to mop up, and the surrounding area's pretty safe to explore, so why not have Bjorca walk back there? Yes, I said walk - why waste an opportunity to kill petty monsters and poke your head in a cave or two along the way, eh?

In a nutshell, my vote is for random adventuring in the general vicinity of Seyda Neen.

Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves
Go back to the start, do stuff there Seriously there's some good stuff early on, the area is quite low leveled and you get some of that wonderful intro to the vividly painted world (in browns) that is the best Elder Scrolls game ever.

Gotta be ready for when the Brotherhood Assassin appears, loving Tribunal expansion

Also you know you can eat stuff to find out the first effect on each ingredient? Wortcraft is very useful early in the game, espcially if you don't know or can't remember (or don't wanna wiki) the effects of each item. Oh and as for recovering your magic with shrines, you sometimes have a try a few times. I normally just spam 5 times and that about covers it.

Gridlocked fucked around with this message at 09:06 on Oct 3, 2014

GrandTheftAutism
Dec 24, 2013

by Fluffdaddy
I hate wortcraft because imagining eating some of the less palatable ingredients (like zombie flesh in Oblivion or human hearts and raw birds' eggs in Skyrim) makes me nauseous.

Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves

ScreamingLlama posted:

I hate wortcraft because imagining eating some of the less palatable ingredients (like zombie flesh in Oblivion or human hearts and raw birds' eggs in Skyrim) makes me nauseous.

Well you are gonna be in for a shock at some of the Morrowind ingredients if you find necrotic flesh to be unpalatable.

Mordaedil
Oct 25, 2007

Oh wow, cool. Good job.
So?
Grimey Drawer

Gridlocked posted:

Well you are gonna be in for a shock at some of the Morrowind ingredients if you find necrotic flesh to be unpalatable.

*snorts up ectoplasma as if it were cocaine*

anilEhilated
Feb 17, 2014

But I say fuck the rain.

Grimey Drawer
Delicious, delicious daedra hearts.

radintorov
Feb 18, 2011
I'm going to vote that we (1) go back to Seyda Neen and do some more adventuring around that area.

anilEhilated posted:

Delicious, delicious daedra hearts.
There's nothing quite like having one of those when you are coming back home* from a day of adventuring and it's already late at night, as long as you don't expect to get into a fight. :chef:


*closest house appropriated after murdering the owner

Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves
Oh another thing for why you keep failing to make potions. As a Orc and Sorcerer you have like 10 points in it; so you better either find a tonne of junk to grind on or make some money for training.

Saurian Supreme
Oct 21, 2012
You simply haven't lived until you've eaten 100 pounds of raw ebony.

I'm gonna vote that you go back to Seyda Neen and explore the area more.

Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves

Saurian Supreme posted:

You simply haven't lived until you've eaten 100 pounds of raw ebony.

Son if your breakfast isn't Rubies, Emeralds, Diamonds and Raw Glass you ain't pimpin' enough to be a Morrowind adventurer.

Ghostwoods
May 9, 2013

Say "Cheese!"

Lizard Wizard posted:

There are a few well-paying quests in and around Seyda Neen to mop up, and the surrounding area's pretty safe to explore, so why not have Bjorca walk back there? Yes, I said walk - why waste an opportunity to kill petty monsters and poke your head in a cave or two along the way, eh?

In a nutshell, my vote is for random adventuring in the general vicinity of Seyda Neen.

Ayup, this.

GrandTheftAutism
Dec 24, 2013

by Fluffdaddy
OK, Seyda Neen it is.


Gridlocked posted:

Son if your breakfast isn't Rubies, Emeralds, Diamonds and Raw Glass you ain't pimpin' enough to be a Morrowind adventurer.

:whoptc: I'm now imagining seeing that kind of intestinal bling on a CT scan.


Eating ebony? gently caress no, that stuff is WAY too valuable. It's too bad there's no Smithing skill in Morrowind; making hundreds of dwarven or ebony arrows at a time in Skyrim is a good way to stock up on ranged ammo and/or make insane amounts of gold.

Ghostwoods
May 9, 2013

Say "Cheese!"

ScreamingLlama posted:

Eating ebony? gently caress no, that stuff is WAY too valuable.

Eh. It's all down to the value/weight ratio. Ebony's too heavy to be really tempting. Dwarven coins, on the other hand...

JackNapier
Jun 20, 2014
I vote we Head back to Seyda Neen and map out that entire section of the world

Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves

Ghostwoods posted:

Eh. It's all down to the value/weight ratio. Ebony's too heavy to be really tempting. Dwarven coins, on the other hand...

Pretty much this exactly man. Ebony in Morrowind weights one metric fucktonne; you need that inventory space for more useful things like potions, spare weapons, ranged ammo, enchanted nicknacks and better value loot. Leave the Ebony in the mine where it belongs.

GrandTheftAutism
Dec 24, 2013

by Fluffdaddy
Sorry about the delay, the game is being a ho. I might need to back up my save file and reinstall it if I can't make it behave.

Chapter III: The Way Back



After a good night's sleep at South Wall, I wake at 6am to find Balmora shrouded in fog. It looks very cool.



Before I leave, back to the Dunmer temple to have another go at recharging my magicka. The Tribunal shrine on the upper floor has what I need, courtesy of Almsivi Intervention.



No siltstrider this time, I'm hoofing it back the way I came.



Not many folks or critters on the road, but at least there's plenty of plants to harvest.



I would love to know what kind of moron puts a major thoroughfare right through a goddamn lava spillway.



Well, this looks promising...



Nix Hound: :dogout:
Bjorca: :orks101:



The gate appears to be booby-trapped. I managed to disarm it, blast the dark elf skulking behind it and...



The game crashed half a dozen times in that cave (some kind of bug, I guess), so we'll have to abort.



At least there's a fuckton of ingredients to gather.



Looks interesting, but perhaps it's best to just let Dunmer dead lie.



the gently caress is that



Ladies and gentlemen, my first encounter with the serial pest known as the cliff racer. Jiub better hurry up and eradicate those fuckers.



Shortly after dispatching the winged menace, I run into a little sidequest: a pilgrim trying to find a holy place somewhere in this area. (It better be in this area, I'm not walking her across the bloody map.)

Options:

Help her
Let her find her own way there
Kill her and loot her corpse



That's it for this chapter while I try getting this thing fixed.

JackNapier
Jun 20, 2014
I vote we Help her unless her destination is across the map, in that case, to hell with her! Leave her to find it herself if it's across the world

TwistedSynapse
Dec 31, 2012

Voted Most Purple Wizard
2007, 2009, 2011, and 2014
Having only now seen this I have to mirror earlier comments of 'wow you picked the easiest thing possible for him' - atronach, really?
Are people gonna vote he enchant his clothing with Soul Trap, too? :v:

There likely won't be much if any suffering in this LP outside of wandering blindly from place to place, even if you don't pick up alchemy.
Still should be interesting to see, though.

Just to be a contrary jerk I say loot her murdered corpse. :colbert:

Ghostwoods
May 9, 2013

Say "Cheese!"

JackNapier posted:

I vote we Help her unless her destination is across the map, in that case, to hell with her! Leave her to find it herself if it's across the world

Good call.

Scaly Haylie
Dec 25, 2004

Y'know, you might want to go ahead and get your screenshot up on LPix. With Photobucket, you run the risk of images in earlier updates dying mid-LP.

Ghostwoods
May 9, 2013

Say "Cheese!"

Lizard Wizard posted:

Y'know, you might want to go ahead and get your screenshot up on LPix.

Yeah, and imgur appears to be in some sort of horrible death-throes at the moment.

BottledBodhisvata
Jul 26, 2013

by Lowtax

Ghostwoods posted:

Yeah, and imgur appears to be in some sort of horrible death-throes at the moment.

Oh really? If it goes down that'll be a major bummer.

Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves

ScreamingLlama posted:

Before I leave, back to the Dunmer temple to have another go at recharging my magicka. The Tribunal shrine on the upper floor has what I need, courtesy of Almsivi Intervention Restoration.

You don't want to accidently get those mixed up when you really need it haha.


Also I vaguely remember her escort quest being stupid and far away, but I believe also you want to do it if you plan on joining the Dunmer Temple faction later as it is one of the "brownie point" quests.

Scaly Haylie
Dec 25, 2004

Also yes, murder her. You might as well profit off of a dead Dunmer at some point.

Antistar01
Oct 20, 2013
Ah, Morrowind; I still consider this to be my favourite game of all time, though admittedly I haven't played it in a few years. (Mainly because really, I've spent a lot of time on it.)

Morrowind with absolutely no mods though... :psyduck: I got the game right when it first came out, and I've still never played it without any mods. For example back then, there was no little enemy health bar that popped up when you attacked something; they patched that in later. So I think the first mod I installed was one that reported how hurt your current enemy was.


It sounded like the plan was to try having Bjorca enchant something. Well... good luck. It could just be that I never bothered with anything but constant effect enchantments, but I found it virtually impossible to enchant anything useful myself, without gaming the system. (Even then it involved lots of save-scumming.) It was far easier to pony up the (massive amounts of) cash to pay NPC enchanters to do it for me.

Still, a perennial favourite was enchanting a belt with a 1-point constant slowfall effect. With only a single point it didn't noticeably slow your falling speed, but it did negate all falling damage. :getin:

Edit: Oh, and a pair of pants with constant restore fatigue so that you can run all day and not get puffed. (Which of course is how fatigue was tweaked to work by default in later games.)


Also I don't remember which holy place that woman is talking about and I'm curious, so help her. (e:f;b)

Antistar01 fucked around with this message at 03:35 on Oct 7, 2014

GrandTheftAutism
Dec 24, 2013

by Fluffdaddy

TwistedSynapse posted:

Having only now seen this I have to mirror earlier comments of 'wow you picked the easiest thing possible for him' - atronach, really?

BUT IT STUNTS YOUR MAGICKA. With my Alchemy level currently ridiculously low, I'm hopelessly short on magicka potions and my usual tactic of ducking out in the middle of a fight and recharging won't work. That means I can either fight with magic or heal myself but not both, which is a huge problem when facing off against a melee fighter who hits like a speeding truck. I never play Atronach, ever. I usually pick the Mage in Oblivion and the Steed Stone in Skyrim and let the racial bonuses handle resistances for me.


Lizard Wizard posted:

Y'know, you might want to go ahead and get your screenshot up on LPix. With Photobucket, you run the risk of images in earlier updates dying mid-LP.

I'm in no danger of running up my Photobucket bandwidth and I'm very careful to keep my LP shots in their own folder to prevent accidental deletion.


Ghostwoods posted:

Yeah, and imgur appears to be in some sort of horrible death-throes at the moment.

I never use imgur, it's notoriously unreliable.


edit: We're tied between murder and helping. Someone else vote please.

GrandTheftAutism fucked around with this message at 03:36 on Oct 7, 2014

Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves

Antistar01 posted:

Still, a perennial favourite was enchanting a belt with a 1-point constant slowfall effect. With only a single point it didn't noticeably slow your falling speed, but it did negate all falling damage. :getin:

Edit: Oh, and a pair of pants with constant restore fatigue so that you can run all day and not get puffed. (Which of course is how fatigue was tweaked to work by default in later games.)(e:f;b)

You know I actually really enjoyed those little "Better Living Through Magic/Alchemy" things you had to do, in order to be superhuman. My favorite enchantment was the Levitate for 1-2 seconds on a Shirt with a high leveled soul gem so that you could spam it to constantly fly around, but it regenerated charges faster than you used them.

It was Oblivions 100% Chameleon bullshit that made me annoyed.

Changing my vote to murder because honestly I hate her, I hate her quest to find the stupid loving cave and you should shank her right in the gut.

SodomyGoat101
Nov 20, 2012
100% Chameleon bullshit is doable in Morrowind, too! Complete overkill, but doable. With around 50% chameleon, hitting the sneak key directly in front of an enemy makes them go batshit, running around in circles yelling for help. Jumping directly over their heads does the same thing.

Silegna
Aug 20, 2013

Hey, heads up. I'm about to unleash my rage.

I say help her, as I murdered her in my game.

anilEhilated
Feb 17, 2014

But I say fuck the rain.

Grimey Drawer

Silegna posted:

I say help her, as I murdered her in my game.
Honestly, I can't blame you. While some of the flaws in this game have been overblown by people (Cliff Racers aren't anywhere as plentiful as the popular joke claims and are honestly kind of cute), the escort missions are terrible. Thankfully, there's only one you actually have to do.

By which I mean help her!

Ghostwoods
May 9, 2013

Say "Cheese!"
Yeah, let's help her.

Mountaineer
Aug 29, 2008

Imagine a rod breaking on a robot face - forever

ScreamingLlama posted:

BUT IT STUNTS YOUR MAGICKA. With my Alchemy level currently ridiculously low, I'm hopelessly short on magicka potions and my usual tactic of ducking out in the middle of a fight and recharging won't work.

That tactic wouldn't work in Morrowind even without Atronach. There is no passive magicka regeneration in this game. Atronach only prevents you from regaining magicka during sleep or during fast travel (I guess you catch a nap on the silt strider or something). In other words, it's not actually much of a handicap. Just join the Mages Guild, each guildhall has a chest with some free potions in it you can use for a while.

Also, murder because gently caress escort quests in Morrowind.

anilEhilated
Feb 17, 2014

But I say fuck the rain.

Grimey Drawer

ScreamingLlama posted:

BUT IT STUNTS YOUR MAGICKA.
Oh no you don't have the access to one of the worst restoratives in the game, you just gained at least two better ones!
Seriously, why do you keep insisting on this even though you've as much as admitted you don't know poo poo about this game?

GrandTheftAutism
Dec 24, 2013

by Fluffdaddy
Because I've played the later Elder Scrolls games, okay? Fine, I'll put up with the bloody Atronach sign. I'm going to be doing a LOT of Alchemy grinding once I get back to Seyda Neen, though.

And I am killing the Dunmer bitch.

Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves

anilEhilated posted:

Oh no you don't have the access to one of the worst restoratives in the game, you just gained at least two better ones!

It is literally the best way to regen in the game. I started not using it because it made the game too easy.

anilEhilated
Feb 17, 2014

But I say fuck the rain.

Grimey Drawer
Same here, I avoid using Atronach because it just takes the fun out of the game. Which makes the whole "the single best way to play a mage in this game IS A CHALLENGE" approach even funnier.

Now, you really don't need to grind Alchemy. While it's a gambreaking skill if you know what you're doing, it's also extremely unwieldy and time-inefficient if you don't. If you're really worried that much about your mana, just stock up on Summon Ancestral Ghost.
You should also join the Mages Guild, their first two lines of quests are basically intended to get you to familiarize yourself with the environment. And they'll teach you alchemy basics too.

GrandTheftAutism
Dec 24, 2013

by Fluffdaddy
Chapter IV: Grind and Smash



Nevrasa Dralor: I don't have time for conversation, outlander.
Bjorca: Then I'll make this quick.



gently caress YOU AND YOUR ESCORT QUEST :fuckoff:



Killing her turned out to be a good investment.



Check out the giant-rear end shrooms, yo.



That little detour with the Dunmer took me off course, unfortunately, so I backtrack to the last signpost, down a few beverages and get my bearings. I just lost precious travel time, and I really want to reach Seyda Neen before dark.



Not only does that not happen, but when this little monster decides to have a go, not only am I fresh out of magicka and any means of regenerating it, I have no weapons and my Hand to Hand skill is so piss-poor that only one in ten punches actually connect. A drunken beggar with rockjoint could fight better than this orc right now. To my utter shame, I am forced to flee.



I finally stagger into Seyda Neen three hours later than I had planned, bloodied, bruised and thoroughly knocked around.



Thankfully, the census and excise office doesn't raise a stink when I borrow their bedroll for the night.



The next morning, I pull out my mortar and pestle and get mixing.



If wortcraft is subject to the same 'percentage of success' rule, I'm not even going to bother. That would be a criminal waste of reagents.



It turns out to be a slow, tedious process until I finally admit defeat and pull up the Morrowind:Alchemy section on UESP. With the wiki's invaluable help, I'm crushing and mixing like a champ, despite most of the mixture attempts failing.



Once I've mixed all I can, I sell the rest of the ingredients, the potions I don't need and all the other stuff I picked up on the road. Oh, and did someone say something about Sujamma earlier? I was, in fact, paying attention.



The rest of the proceeds go towards a bitchin' suit of steel armour. (minus the boots; I had to keep the iron boots I got in Balmora.) Now THIS is what you would expect an Orc to wear.



Nothing left now but to wander around, explore the area around Seyda Neen and chat up the locals.



Fargoth knows how it's done around here.



Note to self: stay out of the water or the xenomorphs from Alien will eat you.



Smugglers and Daedric shrines? Sounds like fun!



I scout out the Bitter Coast road, hoping to see something interesting.



Some Poor Bastard Falling Out Of The Sky: WOOOOOAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH *sickening thud*



There's nothing I can do; the impact killed him stone dead. He's got some great loot though, including an enchanted sword!



Bjorca: It appears your detractors are having the last laugh, elf. Rest in pieces.



My new sword is great, but sadly my sword skills are not. I can't even kill mudcrabs without losing chunks of my health.



Then I remembered Caius saying something about a scout in Seyda Neen who is a Blades trainer. I find Elone, a surprisingly pretty Redguard (especially with the faces in this game) upstairs in Arrille's Tradehouse.



For a pittance, she boosts my Athletics skill.



This is the 'Guide to Vvardenfell' she gave me: a rough map of southern Morrowind with all the major cities marked on it.



On the way out, a Nord solicits me for a quest involving the recovery of some gold.


What's next, goons?

Deal with the smugglers (will take a while since I'll need to recharge my magicka somehow before going in)
Find a Daedric shrine and get up to some mischief
Go with Hrisskar Flat-Foot to recover his gold
Find the trainer in Balmora
Find the trainer in Ald'ruhn
Find the trainer in Caldera
Do something else (please specify)

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radintorov
Feb 18, 2011
Find Hrisskar's gold first, and after that I would join the Mages' Guild and stealborrow the Restore Magicka potions from the supply chest and do a few of their starting quests.

radintorov fucked around with this message at 19:43 on Oct 7, 2014

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