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Hezzy posted:we measure poo poo in MPH as well, its the rest of the euros that seem to get hard for KPH I keep mixing KPH and MPH up, that's why I have 9 points on my license and can't touch a police vehicle until March. I blame the EU.
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Nov 3, 2014 19:31
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chartley posted:What a great statutory defence. That would never work. As a wannabe traffic wank, shame on you but that's for the work returns. Er, pretty sure it would wash with some of the UKIP supporters in the home county mags courts. I literally got 3 points the morning I was going to attest. Had to fill out a declarable form for that one even though I was a good 2 hours short of being a police officer. It's a piece of piss to get points in London because there are cameras everywhere and loads of sneaky 20mph zones.
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Nov 4, 2014 00:47
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Gwent Police have also managed to kill a man with a tazer for eating out his girlfriend (I skim read the article) http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-wales-south-east-wales-29957977 There are now shitloads of people demanding that we suspend the use of tazers. I'm hoping that by Monday, Gwent police won't have tazers or PAVA spray so the public can really see what happens when a slag get's tuned up with a steel ASP Bernard McFacknutah fucked around with this message at 20:23 on Nov 7, 2014 |
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Nov 7, 2014 20:20
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Yep, they've been pretty busy for a force with 1300 officers. At least it gives us a week out of the press so our hate crimes go unnoticed until the Sunday papers.
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Nov 7, 2014 20:43
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I had a splendid day at a war memorial, spoke to some bad-rear end 90 yearolds who ran the Arctic convoys to Murmansk, watched all the ex-soviet ambassadors turn up and place wreaths (apart from Georgia and Ukraine who won't have theirs next to the russian one, which is sad) and then watched the old boys get tanked on rum and get a lift to the train station in meat wagons. A good day.
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Nov 10, 2014 00:05
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chartley posted:But it's surely just a contraction of drink(ing) and driving. Seems to make sense to me. Do you guys north of the border differentiate between driving whilst having drunk too much and drunk and/or drug driving? Lowering the drink drive limit is a good idea, I'm a fairly large guy and after a single pint of export larger I know my reaction times are slower but I wouldn't be over the limit.
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Nov 10, 2014 12:41
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beanieson posted:Car Chasing the Dragon is what we called it when we'd drive around & shoot up heroin. Pretty sure chasing the dragon is where you inhale the fumes from heroin being heated on foil, which I can tell you is particularly difficult if you're driving, especially in a manual. Personally mainlining just before you get behind the wheel is the optimum method of consuming opiates prior to a long drive.
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Nov 10, 2014 14:16
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Branis posted:Who drives manuals anymore though? I never have learned to drive stick and the only manual anything i've ever had to drive is a motorcycle. Anyone who has roads with corners in their country.
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Nov 10, 2014 16:38
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So, I nicked a student from Florida on Saturday night. I won't go in to particulars as he is due in court later but one of the offenses was assault on police after he kneed a senior officer in the groin after telling the custody Sergeant to suck his dick. Because of his diminutive size he was just placed in cuffs, didn't even hit the deck. I'm just curious what would happen if someone kneed a lieutenant in the balls in a Florida police station/gaol? He said 'Nothing' is what would have happened.
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Nov 17, 2014 12:59
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Cmdr. Shepard posted:He'd probably have been shot. We were hoping this would have been the answer. Apparently the silly boy has missed his flight home and his deportation ordered. Won't ever be allowed into the UK again I don't doubt.
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Nov 17, 2014 14:24
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To be honest the arrest was half for his own protection, he was in a really rough part of London, just gotten thrown out of a club and was starting a fight with a bunch of 'bouncers' that would have eaten him for breakfast. He wouldn't accept a friendly lift from us, then he refused to accept a dispersal order and after about a billion warnings and trying to shove me away he got nicked. He calmed down when he was in the slam wagon and we were going to de-arrest him because even minor offenses can have permanent repercussions when you are a non-EU tourist but as he was being let out he went nuts. The look on the guvenors face after he got kneed in the balls, at least he got a free cock examination from the duty nurse, who was quite hot. I hope he went and warmed up his tallywhacker in the toilets to get a bit of bloodflow going for the evidential pictures. Pretty sure they got passed around CID a few times.
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Nov 17, 2014 14:36
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zombie303 posted:That's a cool cop. He is city of London, a tiny 950 officer service covering about 8 square miles within the met. Those horses are always out and about making GBS threads on the streets and causing me to have to slow down so they don't bolt and kick a bystander in the face. The MET has about 150 of those arseholes.
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Nov 17, 2014 20:17
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They should jazz those up a bit by swapping the pictures for ISIS propaganda and a beheading montage. I'll never forget City police printing leaflets telling city traders to stay inside during work hours on May Day, which just gave them a heads up to order tens of thousands of blatantly fake £50 notes to get printed so they could hoof them out of windows on to the protestors below. It actually help them in an abstract way. After we kettled them for 10 hours and they had to poo poo in the street the notes got used as arse wipe.
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Nov 24, 2014 16:00
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Whip has gone back to posting under his parachue account, SedanChair
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Nov 26, 2014 22:18
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P.Much everyone involved in that episode is a scumbag and the officers in question apparently had a terrible reputation. I remember canteen discussions between old sweats saying that everyone got what they deserved.
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Nov 28, 2014 11:22
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Branis posted:smash the monarchy I will fight you.
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Nov 28, 2014 14:26
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I have to say, I love Anchor Steam and a lot of American IPA but your Whisky and Bourbon is garbage. The Japs do it best, if you've not had a decent Hibiki or Yamazaki then you haven't lived. Makes Laphroaigh taste like dishwater. I tanned a bottle of Kilchoman single cask the other night, liked it so bad I grabbed another bottle the next morning.
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Nov 30, 2014 13:15
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