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Carol Pizzamom posted:Ranch supervolcano rumored to be building under the Pizza HUt corporate office in Dallas, Texas, will explode within the next 10,000 yrs 10 days later: Not to be outdone, the Taco Bell corporate office in Irvine, CA, unveils its new subterranean Doritos Cool Ranch Loco Megacaldera
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Dec 3, 2014 03:45
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July 14th: the french revolt as mcdonald R&D team begin work engineering an onion ring containing bacon, mustard, cheese, mayo, bbq sauce, and beef. science races to find breading robust enough to contain the potent mixture
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Dec 3, 2014 04:11
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FEB 1st: new season of Duck Dynasty is off to a great start when the boys use a duck call to call...... family values
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Dec 3, 2014 04:34
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February 1: weed becomes legal in my state February 2-December 31: ...I can't remember
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Dec 3, 2014 04:48
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March 24th: Game of Thrones season 5 comes out and it turns out Jon Snow is actually not made of snow like Jack Frost in that Jack Frost movie. I scream "BULLSHIT" and throw my remote at the tv. March 24th, 2021: My mom finally gives me back my Xbox privileges but I can only play on weekends. GOD, MOM!
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Dec 3, 2014 05:25
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June 2015: Putin nukes Obama, not the USA, just Obama. World carries on as usual. Uncle Joe Biden decides to drink for 7 days straight for the rest of his days in office. World markets and global peace breaks out, just to keep Crazy Joe from doing anything drunk. Including nuking Russia back. August 2015: Congress still fails to pass a budget. John gives up and opens a bar in his Congressional office. Starts up a tab on President Joe Biden. September 2015: Democrats elect a Gary Busey / Angelina Jolie white house ticket, just to piss everyone off. Five Dollah Hot becomes the new national slogan for everything American.Sarah Palin has a meltdown on TV, just for sweeps week. Hal_2005 fucked around with this message at 05:45 on Dec 3, 2014 |
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Dec 3, 2014 05:34
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May 28th: Ebola kills everyone in the world nah just kidding only Africa.
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Dec 3, 2014 06:09
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Sept. 4th, 2015: Baseball happens.
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Dec 3, 2014 06:53
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December 12: The trend of teens huffing gasoline gets to the point that the government declares it a Schedule 2 Controlled Substance. Chaos breaks out as people are now required to obtain a doctor's prescription for each tank of gas, and you can't get multiple refills. To replace the gas huffing, teens begin chewing on bike tires to get high.
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Dec 3, 2014 07:01
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bring back old font leave the troops where they are
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Dec 3, 2014 07:06
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Sept 16th: Everyone is high-fiving, they do it everywhere, on the bus, at meetings, during movies. Obama High-fives a traffic cop on live televison and an NBC news correspondent rates it "7 types of smooth".
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Dec 3, 2014 07:42
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genesplicer posted:To replace the gas huffing, teens begin chewing on bike tires to get high. I would love to see this future. Kids on the street corner slinging baggies of rubber scraps that they all claim is the primo poo poo. One kid claiming he's got the tires from Lance Armstrong's Tour de France wins(*) that have been kept soaked in cristal for the past few years and guarantee'd to rock the chewer's world. In actuality it's just some poo poo he shaved off an old huffy from 1987 that'd he'd found stored above his garage.
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Dec 3, 2014 07:46
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Ron Paul Hype Man posted:I would love to see this future. Heh, huffy
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Dec 3, 2014 07:58
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March 15: Abe Vigoda passes away due to natural causes. March 27: The owner of abevigoda.com remembers to update their website.
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Dec 3, 2014 09:51
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USA demands additional oil and freshwater export from Canada as per NAFTA, Canada refuses and in response the United States invades Ontario. The F35 still catches fire on the runway.
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Dec 3, 2014 09:53
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Jan 7th: my birthday party RSVP
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Dec 3, 2014 12:04
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March 2nd: Apple announces a new phone with a tiny screen and convinces millions that phones with tiny screens are the new big thing. It sells millions. August 8: A dozen other manufacturers release their own, equally tiny phones. They are technologically superior in every way and cost less. September 28: Everyone goes blind from excessive squinting at their stupid tiny phones. September 29: The CHUDs attack.
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Dec 3, 2014 13:21
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APR: 25: Scientists invent a piano...that plays itself! musicians around the world become even more destitute
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Dec 3, 2014 14:24
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NOV 15th: 
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Dec 3, 2014 14:36
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NOV 19th: 
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Dec 3, 2014 14:48
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a starwar betamax posted:NOV 19th: you are playing with forces beyond the power of man to control we will all pay for your hubris
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Dec 3, 2014 14:52
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Nov 30th - Websters Dictionary adds 'chup as a word, the word ketchup instantly disappears from everyday use
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Dec 3, 2014 15:02
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Jan 14th: A dog bark at me.
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Dec 3, 2014 15:08
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jan 1: france surrenders.
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Dec 3, 2014 15:43
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right now: thread gets stickied for some reason
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Dec 3, 2014 15:51
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A misanthrope posted:right now: thread gets stickied for some reason wow you are really living up to your name today 
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Dec 3, 2014 16:03
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a starwar betamax posted:wow you are really living up to your name today i am sorry starwar i haven't had my coffee yet what i meant to say is you have a very nice thread here and best wishes 
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Dec 3, 2014 16:07
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A misanthrope posted:i am sorry starwar i haven't had my coffee yet thank oyu and i for one and gladf that in the bright future of 2015 sentiments like this will be mandatory
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Dec 3, 2014 16:09
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JAN 5th:
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Dec 3, 2014 16:21
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JAN 20th:
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Dec 3, 2014 16:30
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July 1st: First Hippo to walk on the moon.
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Dec 3, 2014 17:02
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June 9th: a mysterious new protein source hits the market, coinciding with a precipitous drop in local spider populations. West mike virus claims dozens of elderly lives. Residents are baffled.
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Dec 3, 2014 17:08
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a starwar betamax posted:APRIL2: terrorist strike April 14: Terrorist strike ends with the promise of eighty virgins and one wise-cracking black friend in Heaven for all martyrs. However, an enormous backlog of explosives remains unused in terror warehouses. June 1: Just in time for graduation, "Mii University" is released which allows high school graduates to use their Wii or Wii U to attend classes. The courses are accredited through Nintendo. Money-conscious parents skip the step of buying their graduates a car and helping them move out only to move back in four years later and just purchase themselves a nice, new car. June 5: Controversy erupts over the "Cooking Mama Basics" and "Science Daddy Intro" course selections, among others, with many university students complaining of sex discrimination. June 10: Still no one has raised a complaint about the "Agriculture Aunt" or "Interior Design Uncle" courses. July 4: In a coup combining patriotism and fighting fire with fireworks, a joint CIA, Interpol, and Yamam task force strikes several terrorist strongholds around the globe. Rockets, bombs, and Sousa mark the end of many terrorist plots and training camps. Countries not allowing the use of spectacular explosives have their terror contingents annihilated using less-fun snap-pops, sparklers and those snake-pellet-things.
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Dec 3, 2014 17:28
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ehd243zaOI I believe that this is all we need to know.
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Dec 3, 2014 18:18
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april- SA officially supports greentext.
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Dec 3, 2014 19:06
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may 5 the post office is closed and you need this poo poo overnighted so you tell the man at the buggatti dealership to give you a goddamn dime piece NOW
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Dec 3, 2014 20:48
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Good gently caress the species. The earth is cleansing its bowels and they happen to be on the surface
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Dec 3, 2014 20:52
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>90% of all species that ever existed are loving extinct.
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Dec 3, 2014 20:52
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Shy. I am very glad of it: I’ll plague him; I’ll torture him: I am glad of it.
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Dec 3, 2014 20:55
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a starwar betamax posted:JAN 5th: Syrup nozzles should be on the outside otherwise it's gonna gunk up the rollers Which better be pretty loving heated to cook the pancake in time!!
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Dec 3, 2014 20:56
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