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Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
Sign Del Rio, start WWEight division

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Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
It's okay guys look at all those tattoos, there's no way punk won't be a successful fighter

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

Bubba Smith posted:

Debuts in the spring against the returning GSP.

:stare:

You gotta be making GBS threads me

I guess next year everybody in UFC's office is getting a lambo

It's a joke

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

Ty1990 posted:

Lol. There is literally zero chance his first fight is against GSP. I don't give a poo poo who reported it.

It was a joke that was written before the announcement happened because it was hotly rumored

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

EugeneJ posted:

Doesn't D-Bry have more MMA training than Punk

I wonder if he'd ever make the jump

There was an interview with him a ways back (like maybe 2010?) where he was asked about this and he said he participated in a small grappling tourney and did pretty good but that his striking is dog poo poo so he wouldn't ever do mma because it'd be really dumb.

I tried looking for it but can't find the specific one I'm thinking of. Here's one from 2012 where he talks about MMA for the first few questions. Basically says he'd rather not get punched in the face once he's done with pro wrestling but would do a lot of grappling tournaments. It'd be really cool to see him at Metamoris some day.

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
Brock was really sent into the deep end after his first fight. I mean a 1-0 fighter going up against Frank Mir is loving insane. That he ended up beating Mir just a few fights later in the rematch is a testament to just what an athletic freak that guy is. Punk would ideally be fighting 0-0 fighters out of China or something for his first like 3 or 4 fights before he gets to fight a redneck bar fighter.

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
Bruce Buffer announcing CM Punk's name will be worth all this bullshit

Esp if he says Phil "CM Punk" Brooks

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

Yuriy posted:

how about zach gowen or nick newell, what are those guys up to

edit: Emanuel Yarborough, this is the fight he was born for

edit: dear god maybe they can get the GOAT, fedor

Nick Newell would murder Punk so hard

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
Diaz vs Punk would honestly be the greatest thing of all time

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
CM Punk's first fight is gonna do big business don't worry about that

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

fatherdog posted:

His first fight is almost certainly going to be on the televised prelims on a show in Chicago.

In his interview with Ariel Helwani he basically said his debut fight will be on PPV.

e: Also it probably won't be in Chicago because the next Chicago show they're running is a bit too early for him.

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

Lid posted:

This looks entirely like its Jericho's fault.

Generally Punk's GTS looks not so great because it's tough to make it look good without really stiffing the dude in the face, which is generally what you don't want to do. In Japan, stiff wrestling is more acceptable and encouraged, so KENTA can knee the poo poo out of his opponent and it looks awesome, especially when the dude sells it by faceplanting like in the earlier gif.

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

Gonzo McFee posted:

Y'all are going to look really stupid when Punk's going on his fifth year of holding all the UFC belts at the same time.


Rousey would probably tap Punk.

She'd knock him out before

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

Aesop Poprock posted:

Could god crank a kimura so tight, even a Gracie would tap to it? makes u think

If Saku couldn't do it, God couldn't do it

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
Not putting Punk on PPV would be a mistake and his first fight's already going to be on PPV per Punk himself (which was likely a factor in negotiations anyhow) so there's no point arguing about whether it's going to happen.

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

Detroit_Dogg posted:

It's like that thing with the marshmallow where you can have one now, or 2 in a minute, or 3 in 2 minutes or whatever. It might be nice to get that immediate boost but if you play it smart you can get a much bigger payoff down the road.

Or he gets waxed by some nobody who spent 2 years of middle school wrestling

Most likely he gets waxed by some nobody who spent 2 years of middle school wrestling regardless so either you get CM Punk getting waxed by some nobody and get a decent ratings boost for some prelims or get a decent PPV boost, it's pretty clear which is the better business decision.

And if Punk wins? Then you just keep getting bumps for PPV. There's literally no reason to put Punk on free TV unless Fox offered them compensation for it.

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

Keg posted:

If you want a picture of the future, Winston, imagine a man with slicked back hair who says cool words being laid upon by a collegiate wrestler for 15 minutes, forever.

Conor vs Frankie would probably be a 5 rounder

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

Mr. Carlisle posted:

A lot of first time MMA watcher wrestling fans are gonna be really shocked when this fight happens not because he is going to get pounded into paste but because they're going to see a fight that has an actual resolution for once

cm punk by split decision

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

Big Coffin Hunter posted:

christmas truly came early to the pagoda god bless us, every one

Thank you cm punk

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

fatherdog posted:

I watched it on satellite and later on DVD, and both times there was a really loud "KLONK" when Crocops shin makes contact, and then afterwards Del Rio was gushing blood from his head, so possibly you might want to shut up about your deeply meaningful analysis of a 500k gif file

Uh as any well educated professional wrestling fan would know, the sound of a kick landing is merely a slapping of the thigh, clearly done by Mr Cro Cop's left hand, obscured by his torso thanks to a well-placed camera angle

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
TBH I'd rather live in this world where noted cool guy Daniel Cormier made Dan Henderson look like a helpless child than the alternate world where noted piece of poo poo Jon Jones made Dan Henderson look like a helpless child.

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
That is the joke

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
I'd watch Mark Hunt vs CM Punk

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

Ty1990 posted:

lmao this thread has legit turned into mma guys vs wwe guys. you're all gay.

Something upon which we can all truly find common ground

our gayness

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
I hope he headkicks Del Rio to sleep.

Then we can get the ultimate superfight, Goldberg vs Crocop

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
It is really weird to see the mma posters get so riled up about the straight edge gimmick in the year 2015

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

1st AD posted:

They'll find some gym rat who is slightly less skilled than Punk, maybe a crossfit competitor

Yoga man from TUF China

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
Pretty sure Punk got the tattoos some time before 2015.

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

BUBBA GAY DUDLEY posted:

Has Punk been beaten by an old guy yet?

Triple H

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
I'm not sure I'd even want him to replace Jon Anik

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
Also Mickey Gall is apparently fighting Michael Jackson.

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

Le Saboteur posted:

I'm guessing Michael Jackson wouldn't fight him because no athletic commission worth its salt would sanction a fight between a guy with zero fights and a guy with 22 fights.

They most likely want Punk debuting at UFC 200 in Vegas and that is not a fight the NAC would sanction.

Apparently the the Michael Jackson fighting Gall is not the Michael Jackson who is 11-10, but a different Michael Jackson who is making his pro debut.

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

DannoMack posted:

Is it the Michael Jackson who lost to Brett Hart in an amateur fight? Please say yes.

Doesn't seem like it, sorry.

He posted his last fight on reddit, which was his pro kickboxing debut:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xbxq3CIaR5k

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
I think if he beats Gall impressively and calls out Punk after he'll probably get the fight.

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

1st AD posted:

lol are wrestling fans actually mad that he left

Wrestling fans are dumb and bad

For the record I am a wrestling fan

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
The Summer of Punk pt. 3

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
No, it's just funny.

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

Triticum Guzzler posted:

this guy got a signing bonus to pay for back surgery and has had years of accident insurance at an mma gym for free, that's a cool scam

Dude's a really good pro wrestler.

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
His name is John Cena and he would probably beat up CM Punk

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Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
Mark Hunt will destroy Brock Lesnar and then replace Roman Reigns because he's just way prettier (only face)

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