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Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
We've had 3 CBs for six loving months how are our owners this incompetent

Canadians do not loving count

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Ziggy Tzardust
Apr 7, 2006

Spangly A posted:

We've had 3 CBs for six loving months how are our owners this incompetent

Canadians do not loving count

We have the two Reeces as well. It's just too bad that one of them is injured and the other one is literally 16 years old

EDIT: lol. Looks like the canadian got injured as well. gently caress everything

Strawman
Feb 9, 2008

Tortuga means turtle, and that's me. I take my time but I always win.


JorahTheExplorer posted:

I can't wait to find out who signs the next alfonso alves.
Also I thought yakubu was like dead

He's only 32 ffs

Tsaedje posted:

I too hate harmless fun

Using autists for the amusement of neurotypicals is a modern day bedlam.

serious gaylord
Sep 16, 2007

what.
This is awful whats the point anymore?

Wengy
Feb 6, 2008

Strawman posted:

He's only 32 ffs

Yes, "32"

Thirteenth Step
Mar 3, 2004

Have we signed Darren Fletcher and Carlton Cole yet?

Also Ideye Brown was bought for 10m, scored a goal which bounced in off the back of his head and then he was sold for 3.6m

lmao

serious gaylord
Sep 16, 2007

what.
Tom Ince has gone on loan to Derby.

Forgive me for being a bit simple, but hes played for Nottingham Forest and Hull already this season, how can he then go and play for Derby?

Ewar Woowar
Feb 25, 2007

Yakubu is awesome

flyingkiwi
Jun 1, 2012

Wowzers!
Just read some great analysis of Cuadrado's stats on FIFA 15, seems like Chelsea have got themselves quite a player!

Shrapnig
Jan 21, 2005

serious gaylord posted:

Tom Ince has gone on loan to Derby.

Forgive me for being a bit simple, but hes played for Nottingham Forest and Hull already this season, how can he then go and play for Derby?

Maybe it's because he's staying in England and not going abroad? idk

euroboy
Mar 24, 2004

Are there any clubs Tom Ince haven't played for?

OoohU
Oct 26, 2013

Bitches ain't shit but genejacks & synths

euroboy posted:

Are there any clubs Tom Ince haven't played for?
Good ones I suppose. Sidenote but it feels like Ince is massively overrated due to his name. If he wasn't a son of an alright player he'd be wasting away at a Tesco and playing Sunday league.

Fake edit maybe that's a bit harsh but my point is he's shite.

chaoslord
Jan 28, 2009

Nature Abhors A Vacuum


Thirteenth Step posted:

Have we signed Darren Fletcher and Carlton Cole yet?

Also Ideye Brown was bought for 10m, scored a goal which bounced in off the back of his head and then he was sold for 3.6m

lmao

I'll always be able to tell my grandkids I saw Irvine's last home match in charge and our record signing (lets be real, we are never spending that kind of money on a player ever again after how well this one worked out) score his only PL goal for the club.

Also no we haven't signed either of them yet.

But at least we aren't going down! I hope :ohdear:

Thirteenth Step
Mar 3, 2004

chaoslord posted:

I'll always be able to tell my grandkids I saw Irvine's last home match in charge and our record signing (lets be real, we are never spending that kind of money on a player ever again after how well this one worked out) score his only PL goal for the club.

Also no we haven't signed either of them yet.

But at least we aren't going down! I hope :ohdear:

Fletcher is at the Hawthorns now I've just seen the 'Sky Sports Player in the window of the stadium shaking hands with a suit' shot. Carlton Cole is apparently done and also we're apparently swapping Dorrans for Martin Olsson.

That's it though I think. I can't stop laughing at Ideye Brown.

Ziggy Tzardust
Apr 7, 2006
Premier League are looking to stop the Jarvis/Zarate swap. This is awful.

sassassin
Apr 3, 2010

by Azathoth

Tsaedje posted:

I too hate harmless fun

I pay a licence fee supposedly so the BBC doesn't have to stoop to column-filling bollocks.

sassassin
Apr 3, 2010

by Azathoth

Thirteenth Step posted:

also we're apparently swapping Dorrans for Martin Olsson.

Good. He's shite and Swansea seemed really keen on him.

chaoslord
Jan 28, 2009

Nature Abhors A Vacuum


Thirteenth Step posted:

Fletcher is at the Hawthorns now I've just seen the 'Sky Sports Player in the window of the stadium shaking hands with a suit' shot. Carlton Cole is apparently done and also we're apparently swapping Dorrans for Martin Olsson.

That's it though I think. I can't stop laughing at Ideye Brown.

At least Cole can't possibly be worse as far as £/goal than Ideye unless he never scores. Which I guess shouldn't totally be discounted.

Like Dorrans well enough but swapping him for Olsson is probably a good move. Fletcher should be fine unless he dies again.

BAE got released by Tottenham, hopefully someone gives him a home.

Bacon Terrorist
May 7, 2010

to ride eternal, shiny and chrome

THUNDERDOME LOSER 2022

Russ posted:

The View From The Subbuteo World

Signed by Wolfsburg- Andre Schurrle



Today Subbuteo Expert Russ will be providing insight and analysis of players involved in deals from a Subbuteo player's perspective.

"If Subbuteo is anything to go by, Wolfsburg have got themselves a real steal here. Schurrle has a knack for being flicked into the right place, and loves to cut inside on my right index finger to unleash a shot fierce enough to knock the policeman figure off his policehorse if playing on a wobbly table. Fans of The Wolves beware though- Schurrle has a history of being chewed by the dog, and narrowly avoided being stood on in a messy altercation that took place during mum's cleaning rounds last week. A gamble worth taking? Time will tell."

Amazing.

flyingkiwi posted:

Just read some great analysis of Cuadrado's stats on FIFA 15, seems like Chelsea have got themselves quite a player!

Is this in response to the BBC having someone do an analysis of Fletcher's FIFA 15 stats?

Ewar Woowar
Feb 25, 2007

chaoslord posted:

I'll always be able to tell my grandkids I saw Irvine's last home match in charge and our record signing (lets be real, we are never spending that kind of money on a player ever again after how well this one worked out) score his only PL goal for the club.



That goal though :stare:

Seriously what a weird and poo poo signing.

Woodenlung
Dec 10, 2013

Calculating Infinity

Dont even think about it, ståle

Thirteenth Step
Mar 3, 2004

Just read that the £10m we paid for Ideye was mostly appearence/incentive-based. So that makes me feel a bit better... if it's true.

Coohoolin
Aug 5, 2012

Oor Coohoolie.
Lukas Culjak to Aberdeen is a done deal and according to the club there will be no more transfer business tonight, so Ryan Jack to Napoli will not be happening.

Also, former Aberdeen player Fraser Fyvie was released from Wigan and is set to join Championship side Hibernian till the end of the season. Wee prick.

Literally Lewis Hamilton
Feb 22, 2005



Thirteenth Step posted:

Just read that the £10m we paid for Ideye was mostly appearence/incentive-based. So that makes me feel a bit better... if it's true.

Ideye Brown will go down as a Savioesque signing

Rakosi
May 5, 2008

D&D: HASBARA SQUAD
NO-QUARTERMASTER


From the river (of Palestinian blood) to the sea (of Palestinian tears)
No one at Newcastle, no surprise.

Russ
Dec 17, 2005

Chimping around, kick my brains round the floor
These are the days - it never rains but it pours
Scottish Premiership's top scorer Tony Andreu having a medical ahead of a £1m move to Norwich. This means Hamilton have now lost in this window their player/manager Alex Neil and assistant Frankie McAvoy also to Norwich, defender Stephen Hendrie to West Ham on a pre-contract, Mikael Antoine Currier has left the club to move to England and Agnes The Tea Lady has been poached by Arsenal. She will be asked to make a more European blend with honey and lemon in it, maybe one of these yellow Lipton sachets you get on holiday, and will return to Scotland before Christmas.

Russ
Dec 17, 2005

Chimping around, kick my brains round the floor
These are the days - it never rains but it pours
Sad to read Tom Ince getting so much abuse here for the standard of his play. He's been coached correctly from a very young age. Always encouraged to SHOOT.

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall

8bitlawd posted:

Good ones I suppose. Sidenote but it feels like Ince is massively overrated due to his name. If he wasn't a son of an alright player he'd be wasting away at a Tesco and playing Sunday league.

Fake edit maybe that's a bit harsh but my point is he's shite.

Ince was proper good in the championship, much like RVT

TelekineticBear!
Feb 19, 2009

Spangly A posted:

Ince was proper good in the championship, much like RVT

he reached his peak young and hasn't improved since, like most young english players in the championship. See here Will Hughes

Butterfly Valley
Apr 19, 2007

I am a spectacularly bad poster and everyone in the Schadenfreude thread hates my guts.
The guy doing the bbc live text is clearly losing his mind

quote:

The old 9/11 position
Posted at 22:24
Rochdale manager Keith Hill may not look like a football hipster, but he is at heart. Here's what he had to say about Matty Done's move to Sheffield United.
"Matty Done has had a hell of time at the club. He helped us get promoted, albeit in a different position, and has been magnificent since we moved him to a number nine/11 position."
Any idea what that is?

Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall

TelekineticBear! posted:

he reached his peak young and hasn't improved since, like most young english players in the championship. See here Will Hughes

Will Hughes is 19 this might be slightly harsh

John Bostock, mind,

e; Harry is actually after Jarvis and I'm pretty sure the prem doesn't allow you to loan multiple players from the same PL club. He's never been one for regulations.

Bobby Digital
Sep 4, 2009

Butterfly Valley posted:

The guy doing the bbc live text is clearly losing his mind

It's an inside job.

Masonity
Dec 31, 2007

What, I wonder, does this hidden face of madness reveal of the makers? These K'Chain Che'Malle?

Butterfly Valley posted:

The guy doing the bbc live text is clearly losing his mind

The 9/11 position is when you go bombing forward into the two big men up front?

Edit: did you know that Tottenham have never conceded to a player in the 9/11 position?
Now I'm not saying they are behind it, but it makes you think...

Masonity fucked around with this message at 23:45 on Feb 2, 2015

trem_two
Oct 22, 2002

it is better if you keep saying I'm fat, as I will continue to score goals
Fun Shoe
Inter and Southampton couldn't get Osvaldo to accept a loan to QPR, so Inter are stuck with him on the books for now. He could go to a club in Argentina, their window is open for 2 more weeks.

Ewar Woowar
Feb 25, 2007

Russ posted:

Sad to read Tom Ince getting so much abuse here for the standard of his play. He's been coached correctly from a very young age. Always encouraged to SHOOT.

Lol.


What do Hamilton do with the money they've been getting for all their decent sales the last few years?

trem_two
Oct 22, 2002

it is better if you keep saying I'm fat, as I will continue to score goals
Fun Shoe
Sky are reporting that Aaron Lennon is on loan to Everton for the rest of the year.

Woodenlung
Dec 10, 2013

Calculating Infinity
Glad to see N'Doye finally getting the Premier League move he always wanted. Brilliant guy.






Hopefully he can get his revenge on Valdes too





:disgrace

Ziggy Tzardust
Apr 7, 2006
According to Jack Sullivan, West Ham have had 8 deals fall through today. One of them was for our own loving player. jfc

Russ
Dec 17, 2005

Chimping around, kick my brains round the floor
These are the days - it never rains but it pours

Ewar Woowar posted:

Lol.


What do Hamilton do with the money they've been getting for all their decent sales the last few years?

The club's strategy is to invest every penny available in the youth academy. The Stephen Hendrie money is being used to put a roof over the training pitch.

The income we've made this transfer window has also allowed the club to charge 10p entry to the ICT game the other week, and do a special ticket offer of 4 games for £20. There's no real chance of relegation any more this season and the club's going to turn a decent profit for the season, so it's just a case of giving back to the fans, trying to grow crowds for next season and investing in the next James McCarthy, of which there could be many candidates, since every player in our youth team seems to be a 5ft1 ginger midfielder that would kill his gran to play for one of the Old Firm.

As a replacement for Andreu we've signed a Czech midfielder who used to play for Monaco and Parma. He was a wonderkid in an old Football Manager game so I'm going to try and start "-10 Potential" chant at the next home game, possibly to Sloop John B.

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Spangly A
May 14, 2009

God help you if ever you're caught on these shores

A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall

Ziggy Tzardust posted:

According to Jack Sullivan, West Ham have had 8 deals fall through today. One of them was for our own loving player. jfc

Why does nobody in this league actually know the rules?

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