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Grozz Nuy
Feb 21, 2008

Welcome to Moonside.

Wecomel to Soonmide.

Moonwel ot cosidme.
This is the 1KoB postseason thread, congratulations to the following players who made the cut:

Grozz Nuy: 660 pts.
Phiggle: 654 pts.
The Puppy Bowl: 646 pts.
JGKing: 620 pts.
------------------------------------------------------- 3 Token Line
marioinblack: 593 pts.
Fenrir: 567 pts.
skaboomizzy: 567 pts.
Felter Chesthard: 561 pts.
------------------------------------------------------ 2 Token Line
Christ Pseudoscientist: 542 pts.
aBagorn: 541 pts.
Gandalf21: 539 pts.
ROSS MY SALAD: 537 pts.
------------------------------------------------------ 1 Token Line
Grittybeard: 535 pts.
Mughe: 525 pts.
Arnold Layne: 513 pts.
Alfred P. Pseudonym: 512 pts.
solauran: 512 pts.
Apples McGrind: 503 pts.
WaffleZombie: 502 pts.
Okibi: 500 pts.
pixelbot2000: 495 pts.
rebel1608: 485 pts.
Ron Roenicke: 485 pts.
axeil: 482 pts.
Akbar: 481 pts.
OrangeKing: 479 pts.
Z.S. Ghost: 477 pts.

For those who need a refresher on the postseason rules:

There are three weeks of postseason play. Since the Super Bowl obviously only has two teams in it, building a list to try to reach 1000 yards would make them nearly identical between players, so the conference championships are the final week to keep it more interesting.

Because there are no Monday Night games in postseason play, your Tucker number must come from the last game chronologically in each week. So for the Wild Card round, it would be the Lions-Cowboys game.

The best players from the regular season are granted tokens for use in postseason play, as indicated by the lines on the standings. If you are above a given line, you get that many tokens to use at any point in the postseason. These tokens work the same way as they do in the regular season, although since there are no points involved the Ryan Token is obviously useless. If you have less than 3 you can save them for later rounds if you so choose. You can only use each individual token (Willis, Revis, Suh, Polamalu) once.

At the end of each week, the top third of the field moves on to the next round, and everyone else is eliminated. 27 becomes 9, 9 becomes 3, and the best score of the final three competitors is crowned the 2014 champion of 1000 Yards or Bust! Good luck!

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No Butt Stuff
Jun 10, 2004

The guy running the competition having the highest score reminds me of my grandfather keeping score when we played cards at family gatherings.

Thanks for running this, Grozz. I look forward to doing it again next year.

Grozz Nuy
Feb 21, 2008

Welcome to Moonside.

Wecomel to Soonmide.

Moonwel ot cosidme.

No Butt Stuff posted:

The guy running the competition having the highest score reminds me of my grandfather keeping score when we played cards at family gatherings.

Thanks for running this, Grozz. I look forward to doing it again next year.

I came in second the year before I started running the game!

kalensc
Sep 10, 2003

Only Trust Your Respirator, kupo!
Art/Quote by: Rubby
So to recap my season:

1001 yards in Week 12 or so
1001 yards in Week 14 or so
1009 yards in Week 16

Miss playoffs by 2 points

:suicide:

Ah well, thanks for all the hours of tabulating and tracking Grozz! Good luck playoff-makers.

Anybody else who missed the playoffs want to do something on the side with gimmick rules? I was thinking about restricting the lists to take 1 player per team, with exactly 2 QB passing, 2 WR receiving, 2 RB rushing, and 2 wild card positions? Hockles I know you're up for this if you're reading!

kalensc fucked around with this message at 22:27 on Jan 2, 2015

Arnold Layne
Nov 4, 2008

Andrew Luck - Passing Yards
Ben Roethlisberger - Passing Yards
Andy Dalton - Passing Yards

Tucker Number - Jason Witten - Receiving Yards

Fenrir
Apr 26, 2005

I found my kendo stick, bitch!

Lipstick Apathy
Andrew Luck - Passing
Joe Flacco - Passing
Cam Newton - Passing
Jonathan Stewart - Rushing

Tucker: DeMarco Murray - Rushing

Insert Willis Token Here

Fenrir fucked around with this message at 00:42 on Jan 3, 2015

aBagorn
Aug 26, 2004
Joe Flacco - Passing
Cam Newton - Passing
Can Newton - Rushing
Justin Forsett - Rushing



Tucker Number: Tony Romo - Passing

Phiggle
Apr 26, 2007

And so, having defeated the nefarious Psy-Crow, our hero, Earthworm Jim, wins back the heart of the lovely COW
This close to the top! Thanks for running the game Grozz. I'm sure I will enjoy flaming out again in Round 1 despite having a bunch of tokens. Two teams and Tucker has worked out well as a strategy but I think I need some extra this time.

Pittsburgh Steelers - Rushing Yards
Pittsburgh Steelers - Receiving Yards
Indianapolis Colts - Rushing Yards
Indianapolis Colts - Receiving Yards
Jonathan Stewart - Rushing Yards

Tucker Number: Dez Bryant - Receiving Yards
Token: Revis

The Puppy Bowl
Jan 31, 2013

A dog, in the house.

*woof*
Luck - Passing
Tony Romo- Passing
Jeremy Hill - Rushing
Kelvin Benjamin - Receiving
Demarco Murray - Rushing

Tucker Number: Dez Bryant

Revis Token

cosmic gumbo
Mar 26, 2005

IMA
  1. GRIP
  2. N
  3. SIP
Joe Flacco - passing
Andrew Luck - passing
Andy Dalton - passing
Tucker: Matthew Stafford - rushing

fast cars loose anus
Mar 2, 2007

Pillbug
Neat, first time in the playoffs

Andrew Luck - passing yards
Ben Roethlisberger - passing yards
Cam Newton - passing yards
Ben Tate - rushing yards

Tucker Number - Dez Bryant - receiving yards

Gandalf21
May 17, 2012


Alright, let's stick with the strategy that got me here.

Big Ben - Passing Yards
Andrew Luck - Passing Yards
Cam Newton - Rushing Yards

Tucker Number - Matt Stafford - Passing Yards

skaboomizzy
Nov 12, 2003

There is nothing I want to be. There is nothing I want to do.
I don't even have an image of what I want to be. I have nothing. All that exists is zero.
Cam Newton - passing
Ben Roethlisberger - passing
Joe Flacco - passing
Marshawn Lynch - rushing
Calvin Johnson - receiving

REVIS TOKEN

Grozz Nuy
Feb 21, 2008

Welcome to Moonside.

Wecomel to Soonmide.

Moonwel ot cosidme.
Ben Roethlisberger - Passing Yards
Andrew Luck - Passing Yards
Cam Newton - Passing Yards
Jeremy Hill - Rushing Yards
Demarco Murray - Rushing Yards

Willis Token

totally losing my mime
Aug 3, 2012

The quiet can scrape
All the calm from your bones.
But maybe it should.
Maybe we need to be hollowed
To get up and grow,
And stop fucking around,
To kick off our braces and start straightening out
Fun Shoe
Larry Fitzgerald - Receiving Yards
Cam Newton - Passing Yards
Joe Flacco - Passing Yards
Martavis Bryant - Receiving Yards
Jeremy Hill - Rushing Yards
Reggie Wayne - Receiving Yards

Tucker Number - DeMarco Murray - Rushing Yards

Alfred P. Pseudonym
May 29, 2006

And when you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss goes 8-8

Andrew Luck - passing
Ben Roethlisberger - passing
Jonathan Stewart - rushing

Tucker: Tony Romo - passing

Akbar
Nov 22, 2004

Hubba-
Hubba.
Ah so my sandbagging (read: forgetting and being too lazy to post a list) these last three weeks haven't harmed me. Cheers.

Ben Roethlisberger - Passing
Joe Flacco - Passing
Jeremy Hill - Rushing
Tony Romo - Passing

marioinblack
Sep 21, 2007

Number 1 Bullshit
Andrew Luck - Passing
Cam Newton - Passing
Cam Newton - Rushing
Jeremy Hill - Rushing
Trent Richardson - Rushing
TY Hilton - Receiving
Calvin Johnson - Receiving

Okibi
Jul 13, 2004

A shadowy flight into the ridiculous world of a man whose music should not exist
Grimey Drawer
Ben Roethlisberger - Passing Yards
Andrew Luck - Passing Yards
Justin Forsett - Rushing Yards
Jeremy Hill - Rushing Yards
Antonio Brown - Receiving Yards
Reggie Wayne - Receiving Yards

Tucker Number: Dez Bryant - Receiving Yards

Bjork Bjowlob
Feb 23, 2006
yes that's very hot and i'll deal with it in the morning


Made the playoffs in my rookie season! It's all downhill from here

Justin Forsett - Rushing
Bernard Pierce - Rushing
Fitzgerald Toussaint - Rushing
Josh Harris - Rushing
Ben Tate - Rushing
Dri Archer - Rushing
Jeremy Hill - Rushing
Gio Bernard - Rushing
Mohamed Sanu - Receiving
Dan Herron - Rushing
Trent Richardson - Rushing
Zurlon Tipton - Rushing
Jonathan Stewart - Rushing
DeAngelo Williams - Rushing
Kelvin Benjamin - Receiving
Greg Olsen - Receiving
Kerwynn Williams - Rushing
Stepfan Taylor - Rushing
Larry Fitzgerald - Receiving
John Brown - Receiving

Tucker: DeMarco Murray - Rushing

Felter Chesthard
Sep 11, 2001
Andrew Luck - Passing
Andy Dalton - Passing
Joe Flacco - Passing
Marion Grace - Receiving
Kerwynn Williams - Receiving

Tucker # Dez Bryant - Receiving

Mughe
Mar 17, 2007

I'll tolerate you until I can replace you.
Ben Roethlisberger - Passing Yards
Joe Flacco - Passing Yards
Andrew Luck - Passing Yards

Tucker Number - Joique Bell - Rushing Yards

WaffleZombie
May 10, 2003

"Identity Crisis" Murderer Wild Guess #333:Prince "Lady Killer Charming "Well, I AM the Adversa"



Thanks Rex Ryan for getting me into the playoffs before you got canned! Of course, my strategy of several lovely QBs won't really work now......but here goes:

Ryan Lindley - Passing Yards
Andy Dalton - Passing Yards
Joe Flacco - Passing Yards
Dan Herron - Rushing Yards
Trent Richardson - Rushing Yards

Tucker: Golden Tate - Receiving Yards

Apples McGrind
Oct 13, 2013

Andy Dalton - passing
Ben Roethlisberger - passing
Joe Flacco - passing
Marshawn Lynch - rushing

Dez Bryant - receiving

Apples McGrind fucked around with this message at 06:51 on Jan 5, 2015

Grittybeard
Mar 29, 2010

Bad, very bad!
Ben Roethlisberger - passing
Andrew Luck - passing
Jonathan Stewart - rushing
Jeremy Hill - rushing
Mohamed Sanu - receiving
Michael Floyd - receiving

Tucker #: Dez Bryant - receiving

OrangeKing
Dec 5, 2002

They do play in October!
Woohoo, snuck into the playoffs with two top ten finishes to end the regular season! The lineup:

Ben Roethlisberger - Passing Yards
Andrew Luck - Passing Yards
Justin Forsett - Rushing Yards
Jeremy Hill - Rushing Yards
Tucker Number: DeMarco Murray - Rushing Yards

pixelbot2000
May 11, 2004

Pay your pussy bill
Joe Flacco - passing
Andy Dalton - passing
Andrew Luck - passing
Antonio Brown - receiving
Tucker # - Dez Bryant - receiving

axeil
Feb 14, 2006
Since I missed the first kickoff...


Ben Roethlesburger - Passing Yards
Antonio Brown - Receiving Yards

Andrew Lucks - Passing Yards
T.Y. Hilton - Receiving Yards
Jeremy Hill - Rushing Yards

Tucker Number: Calvin Johnson - Receiving Yards

Z.S. Ghost
Jan 1, 2008

Odd Fire Wolf Gang
Oh drat I was certain I wouldn't make it

okay

Ben Roethlisberger - Passing Yards
Andy Dalton - Passing Yards
Indianapolis Colts - Rushing Yards
Antonio Brown - Receiving Yards
Kamar Aiken - Receiving Yards

Tucker Matthew Stafford - Passing Yards

Fenrir
Apr 26, 2005

I found my kendo stick, bitch!

Lipstick Apathy

Fenrir posted:

Andrew Luck - Passing
Joe Flacco - Passing 259
Cam Newton - Passing 198
Jonathan Stewart - Rushing 123

Tucker: DeMarco Murray - Rushing

Insert Willis Token Here

580... :frogon:

Grozz Nuy
Feb 21, 2008

Welcome to Moonside.

Wecomel to Soonmide.

Moonwel ot cosidme.
Just warning everyone in advance: I am currently sick with some serious wrath of god type poo poo so results might not get crunched right away. I'll try to get them done on Tuesday to give everyone time to put lists together for the next round, but no promises.

The Puppy Bowl
Jan 31, 2013

A dog, in the house.

*woof*
If you can't get it done by then I'd be happy to do the number crunching. You've been carrying this party for a long time, it's all right if you need some of us lazy fucks to work for our supper.

a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!
Andrew Luck - Passing
Andy Dalton - Passing
TY Hilton - Receiving
Tony Romo - Passing

Troy Polamalu Token

Gandalf21
May 17, 2012


Gandalf21 posted:

Alright, let's stick with the strategy that got me here.

Big Ben - Passing Yards - 334
Andrew Luck - Passing Yards - 376
Cam Newton - Rushing Yards - 35

Tucker Number - Matt Stafford - Passing Yards

745, uh oh

Grittybeard
Mar 29, 2010

Bad, very bad!

Grittybeard posted:

Ben Roethlisberger - passing - 334
Andrew Luck - passing - 376
Jonathan Stewart - rushing - 123
Jeremy Hill - rushing - 47
Mohamed Sanu - receiving - 31
Michael Floyd - receiving - (-12)

Tucker #: Dez Bryant - receiving

899, will my cobbled together Floyd token save me? :ohdear:

aBagorn
Aug 26, 2004

aBagorn posted:

Joe Flacco - Passing
Cam Newton - Passing
Can Newton - Rushing
Justin Forsett - Rushing



Tucker Number: Tony Romo - Passing

Couple of uninspired rushing performances, but at 530, I feel comfortable getting 800+ which hopefully will be good enough to advance.

E. Read the rules wrong. Only 9 advance? I'm screwed.

827...probably on the way out

aBagorn fucked around with this message at 20:47 on Jan 5, 2015

Fenrir
Apr 26, 2005

I found my kendo stick, bitch!

Lipstick Apathy

Ok 956 with Luck going loving nuts. Glad I used that token, holy poo poo. Please suck today Mr. Murray. Please :ohdear:

e: So with the token it's either 993 or 994 (75/2 = 37.5 so depends on how you aim it.)
Pretty happy with this week!

Fenrir fucked around with this message at 02:32 on Jan 5, 2015

Grittybeard
Mar 29, 2010

Bad, very bad!
947 or around there, ought to be good enough to advance unless a bunch of people were amazing.

The Puppy Bowl
Jan 31, 2013

A dog, in the house.

*woof*
872 :ohdear:

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Apples McGrind
Oct 13, 2013

Apples McGrind posted:

Andy Dalton - passing
Ben Roethlisberger - passing
Joe Flacco - passing
Marshawn Lynch - rushing

Dez Bryant - receiving

Dumb, Dumb, dumb, putting in M. Lynch. HUGE oversight on my part.

796. See y'all next year.

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