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That cat is a useless freeloading bastard who will never amount to anything if you don't kick its worthless bitch arse out so it can fend for itself as God intended. Also it's fat.
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Sep 18, 2015 17:12
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is that stair urine? loving porch cats
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Sep 18, 2015 20:16
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MrYenko posted:Why is your dog distance-making GBS threads in the house? I don't have my own dog. These are dogs at work, where we've got indoor yards.
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Sep 18, 2015 21:01
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JohnnyCanuck posted:is that stair urine? nah just a patch of plastic or something its the shared entrance of a duplex. my apartment is nice though.
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Sep 18, 2015 21:15
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 Panda, Panda please. Stop rolling in the red dirt then rolling on my bed. Stop eating rocks, what the gently caress is wrong with you. They are not food, they are too big for you to swallow you are going to die. Don't crawl under the couch anymore either, you are not a kitten. You get stuck. Also please shut up. Even just for five minutes, shut the gently caress up. I don't know what you want anymore.
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Sep 19, 2015 02:10
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LOOK WHOS BACK 
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Sep 19, 2015 03:39
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Sup porch cat. How's porchin.
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Sep 19, 2015 03:40
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Max, you are scared of the dark. Why do you insist on pooping as far away from the streetlights as possible.
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Sep 19, 2015 04:45
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Drum posted:I don't have my own dog. These are dogs at work, where we've got indoor yards. This is about a half a step from being a complete nonsense-sentence, to me. Why are there dogs at work? WHY IS THE YARD INDOORS!?!?
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Sep 20, 2015 06:30
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MrYenko posted:This is about a half a step from being a complete nonsense-sentence, to me.
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Sep 20, 2015 13:05
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Patrick, there are many places you are not allowed to pee in. The place you are LEAST allowed to pee in is the bathroom sink WHICH I AM USING TO BRUSH MY TEETH AAAAHHHHHH
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Sep 21, 2015 08:30
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I like when posts itt leave the animal species in question up to your imagination or did you mean to post this in the "helldump your housemates" thread?
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Sep 21, 2015 08:33
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He is my roommates cat and he is just terrible  
Bomrek fucked around with this message at 22:19 on Sep 21, 2015 |
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Sep 21, 2015 21:37
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MrYenko posted:This is about a half a step from being a complete nonsense-sentence, to me. dog daycare or boarding i'd assume
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Sep 22, 2015 23:33
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 A cat that does not realize its resale value. 
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Sep 25, 2015 13:24
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Retro Access posted:
why did you scalp your cat? is this part of your shaming process? You are a big meanie.
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Sep 25, 2015 13:31
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Both of these wonderful cat toys are now out of commission because the same cat discovered that if you want immediate attention while everybody is out of the room, all that is needed is to press the big button on top of the roomba.
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Sep 25, 2015 13:38
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Cat toys in the roomba is better than what got stuck in ours. Apparently the roomba scares our greyhound while we are at work. Came home to find that roomba has become shitbot
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Sep 26, 2015 03:58
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Porchcat, why don't you understand I'm trying to help get rid of your ear mites? Please stop mauling me when I put the drops in your ear.  I even let you sit in my home all day after.
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Sep 26, 2015 10:25
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Hitlers Gay Secret posted:Porchcat, why don't you understand I'm trying to help get rid of your ear mites? Please stop mauling me when I put the drops in your ear. All I see here is that you let the cat in. Capital old bean. Capital.
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Sep 26, 2015 13:29
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Jesus christ Isaac will you ever learn? We let you out of your cage to stretch out at the end of the day, and EVERY time you go jumping on something or try to climb the kitty tree and I have to shove you back in your cage again. When this happens, DONT SIT THERE CRYING ABOUT IT YOU FOX EARED ARSEHOLE!
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Sep 27, 2015 14:00
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Kiska you fuckass don't start meowing to go outside at SIX IN THE GODDAMN MORNING and then go out long enough to roll in the dirt for a few seconds before coming back in and going to sleep, when I finally relent at 7:30 and just get up.
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Sep 27, 2015 19:47
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Harriet, there was a good reason I was sleeping on the couch last night. The first time you woke me up, fine it was adorable. The second and third time, not so much you little shitlord.
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Sep 27, 2015 20:27
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Dear Arcee, You're very cute But you're probably the meanest cat I've ever met, and I don't know how my sister lives with you. You're not even a year old, so you're the meanest kitten I've ever met. Then you pretend to be nice and friendly because I have food, but I know it's all a ruse. I'm on to you. Triangulum posted:dog daycare or boarding i'd assume Yeah, I work at a dog daycare/boarding facility. The 'yards' are big rooms where dog daycare or individual playtimes are done.
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Sep 27, 2015 22:01
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OK loving porchanimals this is getting stupid. Stop appearing. Seriously.  Im really super serious.  Oh for fucks sake. Warning not cool hurt old puppy feet.  loving fickle fucksticks that's twice this month.
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Sep 29, 2015 01:11
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Rayne you are the worst ninja-cat. After being foiled again and again trying to slip through the gap between my monitor and my computer tower (because I keep pushing you back), your genius idea is to climb on top of the tower... then try to slip back down into the gap. Where you are again pushed back.
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Sep 29, 2015 01:16
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Kiska you dumb rear end in a top hat cat. When I said "stop bringing live voles in" the acceptable option was NOT "instead, puke on your food mat after you eat too fast." You rear end in a top hat.
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Oct 3, 2015 16:00
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Olly stop. Just. Stop. No one needs to hear you squeak a million times I swear the street lamp isn't coming to kill us and we don't need protection from it.
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Oct 5, 2015 06:08
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Moodini, licking my armpit at 6am because you are hungry is not acceptable. You know I work late, I fed you at 1am, all you did was lick the gravy off the meat pieces. Meat is food too. Eat that and you wont need to wake me so drat early. Also, yes, I am aware you pooped, you do not need to shout at me with such indignation about it being in the litter box. YOU JUST POOPED GIVE ME TIME TO SCOOP DAMNIT. And on that note, if you want to watch me poop, dont be so mad when I catch you pooping. Lets go with stop shouting at me over everything and nothing, cos im just gonna shout meow back at you and I think the neighbours can hear us and think we are crazy. You are crazy, thats why your family abandoned you. If they commit me, you'll be back on the streets hooking again.
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Oct 12, 2015 09:05
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Vestral posted:Moodini, licking my armpit at 6am because you are hungry is not acceptable. You know I work late, I fed you at 1am, all you did was lick the gravy off the meat pieces. Meat is food too. Eat that and you wont need to wake me so drat early. Also, yes, I am aware you pooped, you do not need to shout at me with such indignation about it being in the litter box. YOU JUST POOPED GIVE ME TIME TO SCOOP DAMNIT. And on that note, if you want to watch me poop, dont be so mad when I catch you pooping. Lets go with stop shouting at me over everything and nothing, cos im just gonna shout meow back at you and I think the neighbours can hear us and think we are crazy. You are crazy, thats why your family abandoned you. If they commit me, you'll be back on the streets hooking again. catowner.txt right there. Content: Idiot huge puppy. STOP attempting to chase the cat into walls/windows/tables/chairs. If you dont HAVE a concussion your gonna get one and be even dumber!
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Oct 12, 2015 13:02
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I don't know which one, but one of my three cats suddenly decided that he/she doesn't want to use a litter box anymore and is pissing and making GBS threads all over the floor right next to the THREE litter boxes. gently caress whichever one of you is doing that.
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Oct 12, 2015 18:48
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I seemed to have gained my own Porchcat. I shall call her Porchcat II Hello Porchcat II. I petted you once because you are a very sweet kitty and that turned out to be a mistake because you are a stalker. Please stop leaving dead birds and headless rats by the garbage cans for me, I am fully capable of feeding myself. You sure as poo poo don't need to show up first thing Wednesday morning while I am taking out the garbage and present me with a dead bird like you did last week. I'm not going to eat them. I will thank you, however, for the excellent job you did clearing the wild rabbits out of the neighborhood over the summer. My vegetable garden actually looked respectable this year.
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Oct 14, 2015 05:33
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grack posted:I seemed to have gained my own Porchcat. I shall call her Porchcat II naturally once the pretty kitty is done with her reign of carnage you should let the cat in.
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Oct 14, 2015 12:12
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Let porchcat II in please. Tia.
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Oct 15, 2015 00:13
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 Bear, You're weird and dumb. Stop tapping me with your paw for no reason.
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Oct 15, 2015 00:27
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Come home from work today, put the garbage away and there is another dead bird waiting for me. Thank you Porchcat II At least I'll never starve.
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Oct 15, 2015 05:29
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grack posted:Come home from work today, put the garbage away and there is another dead bird waiting for me. You have to eat it now
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Oct 15, 2015 05:32
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Puppy Galaxy posted:
She looks almost exactly like my Porthos  who we also nickname Bear.Speaking of: Porthos, I appreciate your wanting to cuddle as the weather gets cold, but please stop tearing up the inside of my shin with your kneading.
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Oct 15, 2015 05:40
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grack posted:Come home from work today, put the garbage away and there is another dead bird waiting for me. I think that cat's adopted you.
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Oct 15, 2015 09:09
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| # ? May 4, 2024 08:04 |
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What a nice and generous cat
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Oct 15, 2015 11:57
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