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 Neon, you goony rear end in a top hat. You spend all day looking cute but your fur is so black that I can't take photos of you with my cellphone and when I finally get my good camera out for the first time to take some nice photos of you, you reveal your true greasy, neckbeard self.
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Mar 15, 2015 04:50
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| # ¿ May 1, 2024 17:02 |
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To continue the theme: Neon, you furry rear end in a top hat, I know I was out of the house way too much yesterday and didn't give you nearly enough attention but that doesn't give you the right to puke on the bed just as I was about to go to sleep 
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May 5, 2015 23:46
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Neon, you are a tiny, tiny dog. Seriously, you weigh, like, ten pounds. So why do you have the destructive power of a large tornado? Why must you go through life teeth-first laying waste to all that surrounds you? You ruined your new bone after less than an hour of ferocious chewing and I'll be damned if I'm getting you another one any time soon. 
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Jun 29, 2015 23:32
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Ultimate Shrek Fan posted:drat you dog, drat you for chewing on your bone, that was a show piece. One for the wall. More like drat you dog for destroying that bone in an hour so I have to throw it out and now you're sad because you've got no bone so you're going to go and chew the bookshelf to make yourself feel better.
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Jul 9, 2015 02:36
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The Goatfather posted:wilfred won't take a single rawhide bone, if offered When I was a kid our family had a pet maltese-shitzu who would only eat tablets and stuff if you pretended to eat one then offered her one. If you just gave it to her she'd turn away and refuse to take it but if she thought it was people food she couldn't hoover it up fast enough.
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Nov 4, 2015 01:56
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SneakyFrog posted:sriracha and water in a spray bottle or that bitter apple poo poo. When Neon was a puppy and teething really badly I would use that bitter spray on the furniture or whatever he was trying to destroy and he'd watch me spray it then walk up and lick the furniture I'd just sprayed while maintaining eye contact the whole time 
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Nov 12, 2015 22:29
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I woke up this morning to find that I have been gifted with my very own porchcat! Porchcat III, you are very fluffy and have an impressively loud meow but my house is not your house and I don't know what has happened to you to make you think that I should let you in. I've never seen you in my neighbourhood before so I hope you find your way home soon otherwise we will have to go on a trip to the local porchcat shelter. 
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Nov 19, 2015 22:09
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Neon, you goddamned furry fuckball, if you don't stop trying to lick the cream off my fresh tattoo I will cut off your loving tongue  
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Aug 3, 2016 05:50
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| # ¿ May 1, 2024 17:02 |
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Neon, My sweatpants are pants. They're still pants even when I pull the legs over my feet to keep warm so please stop trying to either murder the ends of my pant-legs or drag them off me like a pair of socks. It's a battle you'll never win and it's super annoying when I'm trying to chill on the couch.
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Nov 15, 2016 02:33
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