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I get to go to a comedy club tonight for a friend's son's baseball team charity thing. It's free but I really don't want to go because I'm hung over and this is my only real day off this week. Also nobody came to the counter at Quiznos so I had to settle for a crappy pre-made sandwich because I feel too lovely to go anywhere else for food.
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Mar 8, 2015 22:01
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| # ¿ May 1, 2024 10:15 |
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This probably isn't a first world problem, but I don't want to make a thread. I had to say no to Jesus repeatedly today at my best friend's funeral. I don't share her family's faith but I have always respected it. Their refusal to respect my lack of belief because it will make them feel better by preaching at me is the second most hosed up thing since I got up off the grass and realized she was dead and I was perfectly loving unscathed. No, I don't want to hear how I was spared because I'm a dirty atheist and she was already saved..that implies some sort of godly guilt trip intervention and gently caress that noise, Do you not understand I see the headlights and hear the bang every time I close my eyes? I'm not buying any Jesus today. I just watched my best friend of 15 years die and wasn't able to even call out a warning. I was looking for the cars passing. Do you not even comprehend how much I want to trade places with her? I was looking and I let myself get distracted and now she's dead and the man who stopped to help us figure out the gas can lid was in surgery for 5 loving hours to save his leg. Nothing is my fault, but everything is my fault. I didn't drive the car that hit her, but I was the only one to look up in time to jump clear. Your son said he saw her in a halo and smiling before the wreck. That was loving headlights, ok, not some divine love taking her home, it was the goddamn headlights before the car hit her. I see them every second, you fucker, so don't preach at me.
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Mar 16, 2015 06:36
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One of my co-workers told me she's probably quitting in 3 weeks. She's been there 9 years and is basically holding the place together. If she goes, I'll be the next person with the most knowledge and holy jesus, I don't want her job and I don't want to go toe to toe with my crazy boss to tell her that no, I will not be doing her job. My resume says technician, I will absolutely not be doing receptionist work or helping her groom and yes, I will be taking a loving raise, thank you. Christ, we're so understaffed I have 51 hours next check and our real receptionist just put her 2 weeks in, she hasn't even loving left yet. I spent the last 2.5 years avoiding conversations with that crazy woman. I sure as hell don't want one now.
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Apr 2, 2015 02:48
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I want to watch scary movies on my day off but I haven't gotten curtains yet for the new house and all this sunlight is ruining the vibe. Scary movies are meant to be watched in the dark 
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Apr 12, 2015 20:21
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One of my coworkers really wants us to see Insidious 3 tomorrow but I've been having deeply unsettling dreams about my friend who died 3 months ago and I don't think I need to give my subconscious any ideas. I really like horror movies, but not so much waking up at 3am irrationally paranoid my friend's corpse is standing over me. I have to turn on all the lights to calm down. Horror movies might be out for a while.
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Jun 14, 2015 09:45
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I saw Jurassic World today and it was so loving cheestastic I kept cringing but at the same time it hit every single nostalgia button I didn't even know I possessed. Basically it rocked and yet was a terrible movie. Christ, you think Hammond was naive and reckless but he's rolling in his grave at these people running his park. At one point I actually thought, "God, can we get back to the kids storyline now?" That was how bad some of the other stuff was, I actually wanted to see child actors gape at CGI dinosaurs. But Chris Pratt tho. drat son. I watched Age of Ultron afterwards and didn't even give two shits about it. That's how good Jurassic World is. The park is open and I'm that dumb kid with the stupid haircut running impatiently down the hall, yelling "COME ON, COME ON!" My only regret is that there wasn't a news blurb at the end of the credits with Ian Malcolm yelling "I told you" over and over.
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Jun 15, 2015 02:44
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mind the walrus posted:Found a place that sells a dynamite Reuben. I feel your pain. It got to the point where the delivery drivers started to recognize me which was enough to cut me off.... but goddamn are those good sandwiches. I can't find a good Reuben anywhere near me. It's all super bland sauerkraut and dry-rear end pastrami as far as I can see. I had fantastic sweet potato fries with one attempt though, so that's a bonus. Also, I really want to spend $50 to get a themed hoodie for my favorite tv show, but I should really save my money. But, you know, it's my favorite and I could really use another go-to hoodie for the winter, I only have one that's not falling apart...
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Sep 15, 2016 02:41
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I had a fat toddler in his grandmother's arms lean wayyy too close into my face while weighing their dog today. Said dog went on to try and bite me, but I was far less bothered by the dog than the kid trying to grab at my face. You can muzzle a dog. It's harder to muzzle a toddler. Also I had to endure the boss' kid again and will for the foreseeable future as he doesn't want to work elsewhere. I seriously cannot even figure out his damage, like I don't even know what this woman did to this man to gently caress him up so bad socially. He wasn't home-schooled, he has friends and has had a girlfriend. But he's just so hosed up. It bothers me that I can't figure out his hosed up problems even after years. It's like this terrible mind-puzzle that I'm honestly afraid to look too deeply into, but still keeps popping around corners at work and insisting on me staring right at it as he fails to do even of the most simple tasks correctly and then I have to yell but not yell too much because he'll tattle on me.
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Sep 22, 2016 03:02
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I work at a small family business and the boss' wife keeps trying to include her weird, spergy sons in all us girls' off work activities. And not just in a "hey, you might be interested" way, but a weird and bitchy "you girls went to the movies last weekend, so you're in some kind of movie club, why don't you invite my boys??" kind of way. Her sons now work at the business because apparently they can't cut it in the fast-paced world of Amazon, where one of them literally described his job as "tetris with boxes for 2 hours, then nothing for six". These young men are so hosed up I can't even figure out if it's something like autism or their upbringing or both. One of them was fake laughing very obviously the other morning at the radio and it was creepy as poo poo because I was standing next to him. He talks like a robot from some alternate dimension and all of his reactions are clearly faked, but they weren't home-schooled so the reason of their fuckedupness is making me crazy trying to figure it out. I just don't understand their loving damage and it's driving me insane because I have to deal with them all the time at work and their crazy mother keeps trying to get them into our off work stuff. NO I WON'T GO SEE PETE THE DRAGON WITH YOUR WEIRD CHILDREN, I AM 30 drat YEARS OLD.
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Oct 9, 2016 23:13
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The spaghetti and meatballs I made yesterday isn't as yummy as I was hoping for. And it's hard to find a good complimentary hot sauce for Italian food. Mexican, Asian and regular rear end pizza, burgs, etc. all easily mix and match to a variety of hot sauces dammit.
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Nov 14, 2016 23:55
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I spent too much money on a fancy vibrator last night at our semi-annual drunken co-worker dildo party. On the other hand, I learned that this lady who sells sex toys for a living makes decent money for 2-3 hours of blabbing about vibs and lube and only works like 2-3 days a week + some facebook time. Like, I'm thinking about selling sex toys as a part-time job because my real job sucks so hard that waltzing into a group of tipsy ladies and yelling, "Who wants some orgasms? I've got 'em by the bucketfull!" is sort of seductive. Not even the worst drunken lady could be half bad as our clients. At least these ladies want to be here and to spend some cash.
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Dec 11, 2016 20:43
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I watched Passengers today because of Chris Pratt's face and chest and especially arms. They are a siren song unto themselves. Both of my friends agreed that they would've woken not only one other person but many other people. As a goon, I probably would've just masturbated to hot guys in their pods, ripped through everyone's personal belongings and files and tried to decide the best place to leave my corpse in the end. Being alone for 90 years on a luxury ship sounds loving amazing. I'd video every minute of it and leave the whole log for the crew. I'd be a legend, dammit.
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Jan 1, 2017 02:11
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I love cooking and planning big, easily re-heatable meals for the week, but I don't actually like eating them? I don't mind leftovers because I'm lazy, but I just want to order a pizza or something. I'm too lazy af to want to eat the healthy, delicious meals I've made for the next 4 days. I don't even know how heating up a container and stirring and adding hot sauce or cheese is more work to my stupid brain than picking up a sub on the way home or ordering a pizza but WTF BRAIN, I'M BROKE AND FAT AND WANT TO STOP BEING BOTH, GOD. Also I finished The OA last night and what the hell did I spend 8 hours on?
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Jan 16, 2017 18:59
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Kraps posted:something amazing, dont lie to yourself It was amazing, in that I was amazed they had the balls to end it like that. I don't think the goal of a show finale is to make your audience cringe and watch through their fingers. Because that crazy poo poo didn't get less cringy through exposure therapy, ok.
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Jan 16, 2017 22:04
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| # ¿ May 1, 2024 10:15 |
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I got addressed as "m'lady" by my brother's ex-wife's brother at our 4th party. I stared at my brother for a second before replying, but he just smiled and got up and got another beer while leaving me to have a conversation with the creepy "m'lady" dude. Thanks, bro. Thanks a lot. Also this guy talked to me in that weird, false sort of english accent like he's trying to sound fancy or gentlemanly. It was like the AUG thread came to visit me and talk to me in horrific detail about cars and trucks and all sorts of weird things I desperately tuned out. He left about halfway through the party to go and get his old car he restored and no one gave a poo poo about, we were all just being nice when he talked about it. Jesus. "M'lady". Just loving christ.
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Jul 5, 2017 06:13
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