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  • Locked thread
matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~
when you makin your own burgers, mix some beef broth in with them and some lipton onion dip mix

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matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~
^^^^^ ungh god drat that was so good

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

TEAYCHES posted:

sounds like a great life hack but i am not brave enough to try it

Socially Awkward! and Reserved at the McDonald's

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~


Protip: If you're at Chili's and you get one of their Bigmouth Burgers, be sure to hold the sandwich over your fries while you eat, because the grease and mayo and cheese will drip down onto your fries and season those fuckers right up alongside plenty of salt and pepper

loving live your life; nobody else is going to

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

Nation posted:



that is an aioli dip and chicken salt fries

wherrrrrreeeeee is it

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

i need to make a mayo and call it "Just La Mayo" and cover with hashtags and tweets and cat memes and make a loving mint off of it

it will just be repurposed hellman's

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~
^^^^ +10 points for using spinach for greens; something with goddamn flavor



edit: cold wet lettuce is okay too but it really depends on the burg

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

i love how the ad keeps urging IT'S FOR SHARING IT'S TOTALLY FOR SHARING but you loving know each and every one of those ordered was consumed, alone, in the dark

I MUST HAVE ONE

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~
i fuckin love a sourdough jack

in fact, that is all i ever get there

jack in the box may be on the lower end of burger quality, but on the other hand - where else can you burg at 3AM?

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~
i don't get wendy's

every time i've eaten there, i've literally thought "i could have eaten at mcdonald's/whataburger/carl's jr/creepy local joint instead"

apparently their chili is still in high demand; i work with a lady who'll blow you for some wendy's chili

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

proof of concept posted:

at this place:


the fact i live in texas and didn't know this is almost like living in new york and never having visited the statue of liberty

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

proof of concept posted:

there are no words

i've lived a life where there are exactly three restaurants you can visit at 3AM

1) jack in the box
2) taco bell
3) trucker diner

option 3 has lead to more interesting life experiences but the first two are gastronimically light years ahead for obvious reasons

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~
steak n shake i go to to have their chili mac with the noodles and beans and a shitload of oyster crackers

just a disgusting carbload of carby carbs but drat son i ain't never been as happy as i was digging into steak n shake chili mac

also roger ebert bonded with david letterman over their shared love of steak n shake and that just adds an extra soupcon of gently caress yes to the joint

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~


son we're bugin' in here, not making a weakass attempt to derail

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

VendaGoat posted:

I call Heresy on this one

delicious, greasy heresy

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

VendaGoat posted:

And motherfucker, I once stood over a sink and ate an entire bag of Oreos

in another world, there's an Oreo Anonymous meeting happening and YOU ARE THE LEADER

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

VendaGoat posted:

I would be dead from Heart Disease before admitting I had a problem with Oreos

just imagining you in front of a judge, your hair out of whack, your fingernails caked dense with chocolate crumbs, your lips circled with a greasy sheen of white cream

"yeah well uh - burp - maybe they shouldn't have made them so good to eat; you ever think of that, yer honor?"

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

no sean don't kill the burg it's trying to be your friend

your sexy, delicious friend

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~
no mom i will not cook your burger until it is a loving puck of coal it is okay to eat meat that is pink god drat it quit being a loving food bitch and EAT THE BURG

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

The Mad Archivist posted:

actually while steak is okay to eat pink, ground beef is still incredibly risky to eat rare. it has to do with the harmful e-coli living in the cow's gut; with steak if it gets anywhere during the process of being slaughtered, it will be on the surface of the steak, so if you sear it it will probably be killed off in short order. with ground beef it's been mixed up considerably so the chances of e-coli being spread around somewhere inside the ground beef is much higher

i live dangerously deliciously

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~
i wanna try that some day but it looks like prepwork is a bitch

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~
haha what are those fried chicken livers??? on a donut???

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~
the b stands for butt lmao

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

QUEEN CAUCUS posted:

In N Out isn't even that good
their burgers are completely average
also their fries and shakes are poo poo

got a strong take here

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~
i'll take number two plz

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~
motherfucker do you even liver and onions

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

social vegan posted:

holy moly that one

then, much later, i'll take a number two!!!!! :getin:

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

thathonkey posted:

there is a "fancy burger restaurant" near me that is generally overpriced but they do make a burger which I am fond of called the "Oaxaca"

it's a beef patty unlike some of their burgers, cilantro-lime mayo, "queso fresco" (it's just mexican crumbling cheese though), and pico de gallo. i'm gonna try and make my own because while they do have the ingredients right, the execution and price usually leaves something to be desired.

picture (i ditch the avocado but if you're into that it's probably decent):



avocado good but what the gently caress why put a giant goddamn wedge on there

Chinatown posted:

bleu cheese on burgers is also extremely good

yisssssss the peppercorn bigmouth burg at chili's was my ffaaaaavvvorite and then they took it away the fucks

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~
seems like the kind of person who knows what things taste good together but has never bothered to actually eat any of them because he's more interested in gastronomy than practical eating

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

lol @ space station booths

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~
to place your order, just pick up the beige telephone between your legs and whistle at the correct tone and frequency

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~
your meal will be served to you on a platter descending from the ceiling while 8-bit Ava Maria plays from every speaker in the restaurant

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~
edit: ^^^^^^ ahahaha

your waiter will resemble freddy mercury, but not sound nor act anything like him

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~
lil' over enthusiastic for the goatse there

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

Ron Jeremy posted:

The word burg is dumb and makes you sound like you're wearing multiple popped collar polos

what happens to your blood pressure when you hear someone unironically order a frozen marg

matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~

Fetus Tree posted:

Weird that ive never had one

Always get em on the rocks like a real man

those go too fast for me. like liquored up kool aid. i have no impulse control with sweet cocktails

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matrix ripoff
Mar 16, 2005

~~~~~~~
i only suck dick in self defense
~~~~~~~
and at the bookstore
~~~~~~~
maybe if i pair a martini with a really good burg i could finally finish one of the nasty loving things

  • Locked thread