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B.B. Rodriguez
Aug 8, 2005

Bender: "I was God once." God: "Yes, I saw. You were doing well until everyone died."

Ok peoples here we go with the schedule for the week:

code:
Round 1 - Mar 06 10:00PM EST

Mar 06 10:00 EST 	Los Angeles	v.	Chicago		[UniMas]	

Mar 07  3:00 EST 	DC		v.	Montreal
Mar 07  4:00 EST	Philadelphia	v.	Colorado
Mar 07  6:00 EST	Vancouver	v.	Toronto
Mar 07  8:30 EST	Dallas		v.	San Jose
Mar 07 10:30 EST	Portland	v.	Salt Lake

Mar 08  5:00 EST	Orlando		v.	NYCFC		[ESPN2]
Mar 08  7:00 EST	Kansas City	v.	NYRB		[FOX-1]
Mar 08  9:30 EST	Seattle		v.	New England	[FOX-1]
In Fantasy news, matchups will be posted as this round starts, so poo poo be random this week.

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El Jebus
Jun 18, 2008

This avatar is paid for by "Avatars for improving Lowtax's spine by any means that doesn't result in him becoming brain dead by putting his brain into a cyborg body and/or putting him in a exosuit due to fears of the suit being hacked and crushing him during a cyberpunk future timeline" Foundation
Boy, Zardes and Amarikwa haven't done poo poo for me so far.

Jack2142
Jul 17, 2014

Shitposting in Seattle

damnit Zardes I captained you... u better watch yo azz or imma swap in jozy.

Dallan Invictus
Oct 11, 2007

The thing about words is that meanings can twist just like a snake, and if you want to find snakes, look for them behind words that have changed their meaning.
I don't know what possessed me to start Larentowicz but...yeah. At least they didn't dock him points for that "clearance".

B.B. Rodriguez
Aug 8, 2005

Bender: "I was God once." God: "Yes, I saw. You were doing well until everyone died."

Fukkin Jozy with 30pts this week for me. :gizz:

gently caress yeah for making him Captain. :haw:

Jack2142
Jul 17, 2014

Shitposting in Seattle

B.B. Rodriguez posted:

Fukkin Jozy with 30pts this week for me. :gizz:

gently caress yeah for making him Captain. :haw:

I picked Zardes over Jozy... why!!! all my players did terrible dammit!

Reek
Nov 3, 2002

every.fucking.year.
Tyler Deric was the first guy on my team sheet.

:smug:

(everyone else is poo poo)

foobardog
Apr 19, 2007

There, now I can tell when you're posting.

-- A friend :)
Martins saved my rear end.

B.B. Rodriguez
Aug 8, 2005

Bender: "I was God once." God: "Yes, I saw. You were doing well until everyone died."

:siren: OHKAY! It's time for you to know if you suck, got unlucky, or are cursing yourself for not starting Jozy! :siren:

Your Results for Round 1:

code:
Stay Free Last Place	75 - 68		Tadpoles FC
Apathy FC		49 - 36		FC Taco Town
HYB Grim SC		61 - 60		Cup Check
Black Panthers FC	65 - 53		RIP Chivas USA FC SC
Buttzilla Butts		72 - 44		TheLastRacconFighter
253 Power Hour		40 - 50		Chivas Pro Cycling
Duty Free FC		70 - 64		Los Spooners
Aiming for the spoon	35 - 34		burrito squad
Réal Montréal		37 - 42		La Furia Rosa
Bumblebee FC		26 - 38		Austin > Orlando
Higuain Chipshots	46 - 33		Nybble And Bits
Scab Capos SC		39 - 53		Forums Cancer
Atletico Uniballer	46 - 58		TED LASSO IRL LOL
Words FC		27 - 52		FC Dullest
Portland Wildlife II	36 - 41		Zemanski's Torn ACL
Victorious Secret	48 - 40		all stars=wins?
Peay and Doody		46 - 45		Walla Walla Wardens
malachi crunch		53 - 53		QuarterInchGap
And your current standings:
code:
			W	D	L	+	P
1  Stay Free Last Place	1	0	0	75	3
2  Buttzilla Butts	1	0	0	72	3
3  Duty Free FC		1	0	0	70	3
4  Black Panthers FC	1	0	0	65	3
5  HYB Grim SC		1	0	0	61	3
6  TED LASSO IRL LOL	1	0	0	58	3
7  Forums Cancer	1	0	0	53	3
8  FC Dullest		1	0	0	52	3
9  Chivas Pro Cycling	1	0	0	50	3
10 Apathy FC		1	0	0	49	3
11 Victorious Secret	1	0	0	48	3
12 Higuain Chipshots	1	0	0	46	3
12 Peay and Doody	1	0	0	46	3
14 La Furia Rosa	1	0	0	42	3
15 Zemanski's Torn ACL	1	0	0	41	3
16 Austin > Orlando	1	0	0	38	3
--------------------PLAYOFFS?! WHAT?!--------------------
17 Aiming for the spoon	1	0	0	35	3
18 QuarterInchGap	0	1	0	53	1
18 malachi crunch	0	1	0	53	1
20 Tadpoles FC		0	0	1	68	0
21 Los Spooners		0	0	1	64	0
22 Cup Check		0	0	1	60	0
23 RIP Chivas USA FC SC	0	0	1	53	0
24 Atletico Uniballer	0	0	1	46	0
25 Walla Walla Wardens	0	0	1	45	0
26 TheLastRacconFighter	0	0	1	44	0
27 253 Power Hour	0	0	1	40	0
27 all stars=wins?	0	0	1	40	0
29 Scab Capos SC	0	0	1	39	0
30 Réal Montréal	0	0	1	37	0
31 FC Taco Town		0	0	1	36	0
31 Portland Wildlife II	0	0	1	36	0
33 burrito squad	0	0	1	34	0
34 Nybble And Bits	0	0	1	33	0
35 Words FC		0	0	1	27	0
36 Bumblebee FC		0	0	1	26	0

highme
May 25, 2001


I posted my food for USPOL Thanksgiving!


Only in Fantasy MLS can you have a game result in a 53-53 tie

joshtothemaxx
Nov 17, 2008

I will have a whole army of zombies! A zombie Marine Corps, a zombie Navy Corps, zombie Space Cadets...
After bitching about fantasy spergs all last year I get 2nd place after week one. Look at me go.

Nybble
Jun 28, 2008

praise chuck, raise heck
I think I don't "get" Fantasy in a soccer context. Too used to NFL/NHL and ended up spreading out my value too thin. But, week 1. We'll see.

Jack2142
Jul 17, 2014

Shitposting in Seattle

My team failed badly, time to revamp my offense (Kamara you failed me) and it seems like Zardes is moving towards the wings, now time to hop aboard the Jozy train. Also Piati is out for me now its Barnes time. At least I picked right on feilhaber :/

joshtothemaxx
Nov 17, 2008

I will have a whole army of zombies! A zombie Marine Corps, a zombie Navy Corps, zombie Space Cadets...

Nybble posted:

I think I don't "get" Fantasy in a soccer context. Too used to NFL/NHL and ended up spreading out my value too thin. But, week 1. We'll see.

Fantasy soccer is all about finding two things: goals and the clean sheets, that's really about it. Football/Baseball/Basketball, there's as many as 10 stats to care about.

insider
Feb 22, 2007

A secret room... always my favourite room in a house.

Jack2142 posted:

My team failed badly, time to revamp my offense (Kamara you failed me) and it seems like Zardes is moving towards the wings, now time to hop aboard the Jozy train. Also Piati is out for me now its Barnes time. At least I picked right on feilhaber :/

Kamara would have had a brace without ridiculous goalkeeping, and Zardes was an inch away from scoring a few times. I wouldn't write off either player just yet (I personally have Zardes).

threeagainstfour
Jun 27, 2005


Zardes and Shuttleworth let me down huge this week. Zardes in particular missed two golden opportunities. He can be real streaky though and he will probably get it together. I'd be more upset if I had left Dom Dwyer on after those two train wrecks during his game this week.

Jack2142
Jul 17, 2014

Shitposting in Seattle

insider posted:

Kamara would have had a brace without ridiculous goalkeeping, and Zardes was an inch away from scoring a few times. I wouldn't write off either player just yet (I personally have Zardes).

realistically yes Kamara isn't bad, I might still keep him. I am dropping Zardes I feel he is going to play the midfielder role on the wings/forward and might not score as many from there. I am debating picking up Rivero he was promising against TFC.

Also a hint, Jewsbury is cheap and takes up a defender slot but is playing midfield and seems to be the main set piece guy for Portland atm... I think I am gonna hold him for awhile at least till Johnson or Valeri returns. For 5 mil I think he can be good for an assist or goal at some point.

red_blip
Feb 19, 2008

Fine human machine.
Lawd have mercy, my Tadpoles F.C. earned me 68 points and I still lost.

Always captain Jozy, guys.

e: Kljestan... I was really hoping he'd run rampant on SKC.

B.B. Rodriguez
Aug 8, 2005

Bender: "I was God once." God: "Yes, I saw. You were doing well until everyone died."

red_blip posted:

Lawd have mercy, my Tadpoles F.C. earned me 68 points and I still lost.

Always captain Jozy, guys.

e: Kljestan... I was really hoping he'd run rampant on SKC.

Yeah I got pretty lucky this week. You had the highest losing score and the 4th highest overall. The auto-sub when Barnes didn't play for NE and put in Shipp saved me.

B.B. Rodriguez
Aug 8, 2005

Bender: "I was God once." God: "Yes, I saw. You were doing well until everyone died."

Double-posting the Matchups for this week:

Deadline: Mar 13 7:00PM EDT

Round 2 Matchups
code:
Stay Free Last Place	v	burrito squad
Los Spooners		v	La Furia Rosa
Chivas Pro Cycling	v	Austin > Orlando
TheLastRacconFighter	v	Nybble And Bits
RIP Chivas USA FC SC	v	Forums Cancer
Cup Check		v	TED LASSO IRL LOL
FC Taco Town		v	FC Dullest
Tadpoles FC		v	Zemanski's Torn ACL
Apathy FC		v	all stars=wins?
HYB Grim SC		v	Walla Walla Wardens
Black Panthers FC	v	QuarterInchGap
Buttzilla Butts		v	malachi crunch
253 Power Hour		v	Peay and Doody
Duty Free FC		v	Victorious Secret
Aiming for the spoon	v	Portland Wildlife II
Réal Montréal		v	Words FC
Bumblebee FC		v	Atletico Uniballer
Higuain Chipshots	v	Scab Capos SC
Good luck to all!

JERFit
Dec 25, 2007

if someone said they'd give me money to play music + not have a job anymore I'd say NO
I've got big wondo as my captain and the quakes get to visit Seattle this weekend. Lol rip me.

Syrinxx
Mar 28, 2002

Death is whimsical today

I don't suppose I could sneak into this league for week 2? I totally forgot about this until yesterday but would like to play even if I'll be short a week's points.

B.B. Rodriguez
Aug 8, 2005

Bender: "I was God once." God: "Yes, I saw. You were doing well until everyone died."

As far as I know (as The Don of this league) you can join.

edit: Or not. All my options are greyed out. Try anyway!

Syrinxx
Mar 28, 2002

Death is whimsical today

drat it's closed

:emo:

Syrinxx fucked around with this message at 01:58 on Mar 16, 2015

insider
Feb 22, 2007

A secret room... always my favourite room in a house.
I'm not real happy with my team at this point. I might use the 'blow it all up' option next week which I didn't use at all last season.

JERFit
Dec 25, 2007

if someone said they'd give me money to play music + not have a job anymore I'd say NO

JERFit posted:

I've got big wondo as my captain and the quakes get to visit Seattle this weekend. Lol rip me.

Eating my words. Hail satan. Go quakes.

insider
Feb 22, 2007

A secret room... always my favourite room in a house.

insider posted:

Kamara would have had a brace without ridiculous goalkeeping, and Zardes was an inch away from scoring a few times. I wouldn't write off either player just yet (I personally have Zardes).

:smug:

Jack2142
Jul 17, 2014

Shitposting in Seattle

I wrote off Zardes and grabbed Rivero he is cheaper, and scored too :/ albiet I am murdering my midfield now... (they failed me)

El Jebus
Jun 18, 2008

This avatar is paid for by "Avatars for improving Lowtax's spine by any means that doesn't result in him becoming brain dead by putting his brain into a cyborg body and/or putting him in a exosuit due to fears of the suit being hacked and crushing him during a cyberpunk future timeline" Foundation
I have 5 players that are on bye next week. Didn't think I would be using my wildcard so quickly... Did worse points wise this week but managed to eek out a win unlike last week where I was the second best loser. Horst has picked me up 4 points over 2 weeks, think he might do any better or am I just better off dumping him?

insider
Feb 22, 2007

A secret room... always my favourite room in a house.

El Jebus posted:

I have 5 players that are on bye next week. Didn't think I would be using my wildcard so quickly... Did worse points wise this week but managed to eek out a win unlike last week where I was the second best loser. Horst has picked me up 4 points over 2 weeks, think he might do any better or am I just better off dumping him?

See I asked in the main MLS thread about Horst and they said he lost his starting spot but seemed to have it back last game so I have no idea. He was my goto cheap defender last year, but IMO he seems to risky to have on teh roster until it is more apparent how much playing time he is going to get.

joshtothemaxx
Nov 17, 2008

I will have a whole army of zombies! A zombie Marine Corps, a zombie Navy Corps, zombie Space Cadets...
Get hosed shitlords. Buttzilla Butts rollin this house.

Iridium
Apr 4, 2002

Wretched Harp

Syrinxx posted:

I don't suppose I could sneak into this league for week 2? I totally forgot about this until yesterday but would like to play even if I'll be short a week's points.

same here.

Oh well, I was a couple weeks late last time too and still finished mid-table.

red_blip
Feb 19, 2008

Fine human machine.
Tied for first in total points. Still in 10th place.

Staying away from RBNY for now.

Uniballer
May 14, 2005

Some guy bought me this avatar as a reward for defeating Skizzzer in Internet Hockey. I have slain the mighty! Also, Taylor Hall is gay.
I need some goon help. Why hasn't DeLaGarza been playing this year?

B.B. Rodriguez
Aug 8, 2005

Bender: "I was God once." God: "Yes, I saw. You were doing well until everyone died."

Uniballer posted:

I need some goon help. Why hasn't DeLaGarza been playing this year?

Bone bruise in his foot for all of preseason. He should be good next week.

insider
Feb 22, 2007

A secret room... always my favourite room in a house.
I used my wildcard. I had too much of my money tied up into too few players and with TFC/CLB/SEA all on byes this week I had no choice really. I like my new line up a lot.

Some tips as I'm feeling generous...

-Grana for CLB is going to be over $8 very very soon and is super cheap at $6.6. Get in now on him.
-Villarreal and Rowe on LA are super cheap for starters. Rowe is going to be my backup GK when Clark is out on bye.
-Good call on whoever said Jewsbury is listed as a defender but is playing midfield.

I hope the price on Higuain comes down significantly over the bye week.

Reek
Nov 3, 2002

every.fucking.year.
A DRAW?!? This is an outrage.

B.B. Rodriguez
Aug 8, 2005

Bender: "I was God once." God: "Yes, I saw. You were doing well until everyone died."

Your results from the weekend:
code:
Stay Free Last Place	39 - 33	burrito squad
Los Spooners		46 - 30	La Furia Rosa
Chivas Pro Cycling	55 - 30	Austin > Orlando
TheLastRacconFighter	42 - 18	Nybble And Bits
RIP Chivas USA FC SC	39 - 46	Forums Cancer
1.FC Cup Check		41 - 41	TED LASSO IRL LOL
FC Taco Town		40 - 36	FC Dullest
Tadpoles FC		47 - 45	Zemanski's Torn ACL
Apathy FC		52 - 31	all stars=wins?
HYB Grim SC		27 - 34	Walla Walla Wardens
Black Panthers FC	41 - 23	QuarterInchGap
Buttzilla Butts		43 - 40	malachi crunch
253 Power Hour		44 - 44	Peay and Doody
Duty Free FC		43 - 57	Victorious Secret
Aiming for the spoon	15 - 24	Portland Wildlife II
Réal Montréal		12 - 18	Words FC
Bumblebee FC		11 - 36	Atletico Uniballer
Higuain Chipshots	50 - 38	Scab Capos SC

Pinkie
Mar 12, 2012

B.B. Rodriguez posted:

Your results from the weekend:
code:
Bumblebee FC	11 - 36	Atletico Uniballer

bahahaha, I'm so terrible. Half the players on my team are on a bye this week - I assume this mean I'm going to perform poorly again?

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insider
Feb 22, 2007

A secret room... always my favourite room in a house.
I thought Penedo went to another team and Rowe was the starter. Apparently I am an idiot. Woo 0 points for my keeper.

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