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sell all you're cars to buy 80s maseratis
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Mar 2, 2015 07:35
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If you're under your car and notice an oil leak take a shop rag and just rub that poo poo all over the bottom of the engine until everything looks super shiny.
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Mar 2, 2015 08:25
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Impact your wheel studs on until it stops turning and thats what 95ft/lbs is.
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Mar 2, 2015 09:02
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Have two batteries and need a quick charge? Hold one battery upsidedown and touch the contacts together! This will instantly charge the battery! Actual advice given to me by an Autozone employee
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Mar 2, 2015 09:09
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tuna posted:Impact your wheel studs on until it stops turning and thats what 95ft/lbs is. You can do the same thing with sump plugs.
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Mar 2, 2015 11:45
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Ephphatha posted:You can do the same thing with sump plugs. Nah you really oughta follow the torque spec: BAM: 50 ft-lb BAM BAM: 75 ft-lb BAM BAM BAM: 90 ft-lb
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Mar 2, 2015 11:56
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Revving your engine to keep your car from rolling back on a hill at a stop reduces wear to the brakes.
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Mar 2, 2015 13:16
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Avoid speed bumps by driving up the middle of the road. Suddenly swerving into the middle of the road is also an excellent way of promoting alertness in oncoming traffic. Only sadness and pain can result from using half of the flashing orange light things. Instead, just use the big red "I've Parked Here Bitches" button. Halfords berry scented screenwash looks like ribena, smells like ribena, tastes like wookie piss. Not recommended.
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Mar 2, 2015 13:45
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Make sure when putting your wheels back on, that your lug nuts are slightly loose. This will prevent them from binding and make the wheel easier to get off next time! This also applies to spark plugs and all brake parts.
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Mar 2, 2015 15:21
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The best way to warm up a really cold engine is to immediately keep it reving at about 5K RPM after the cold start. You'll be ready to drive away in as little as a couple minutes minutes with warm air coming out of the heat vent. Diesels, drop to about 4K RPM.
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Mar 2, 2015 15:21
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busting loose the crank pully off subarus is easy by attaching a long breaker bar to the nut and cranking the engine over.
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Mar 2, 2015 15:53
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Preoptopus posted:busting loose the crank pully off subarus is easy by attaching a long breaker bar to the nut and cranking the engine over. But how do you get it tight again?  ninja edit: of course just reverse the battery cables to get the starter to spin the other way, duh me!
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Mar 2, 2015 16:04
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Don't have children because it'll cut into your project car budget. While you can technically race children, it isn't nearly as fun as racing a car. Also, there are legal implications for trying to sell your project child after you're sick and done with it since it literally won't stop pissing and making GBS threads all over you.
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Mar 2, 2015 16:46
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Just trust the dealer. "They made the car, they know what they're doing" - My mother.
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Mar 2, 2015 16:58
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If you live in a condo and park outside plug your car in as soon as it dips below 60F. Instant heat as soon as you turn your car on.
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Mar 2, 2015 18:12
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91 octane is a scam, fill 3/4 of your tank with 87, then fill the rest with water. Boom! Instant 93 octane gas. You're welcome, internet!
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Mar 2, 2015 19:31
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Phone posted:Don't have children because it'll cut into your project car budget. While you can technically race children, it isn't nearly as fun as racing a car. Also, there are legal implications for trying to sell your project child after you're sick and done with it since it literally won't stop pissing and making GBS threads all over you. This thread is only for funny "life hacks" that don't actually work.
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Mar 2, 2015 19:38
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Save money by never having a functional vehicle. Sure, you'll never get anywhere on time or be able to brag about how you "totally dusted this bro in a Civic, you shoulda been there", but with all the money you save on gas and insurance you might even be able to afford that big package of Top Ramen you've been eyeing at the Shop'n'Save. Plus, everyone loves lawn art!
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Mar 2, 2015 19:50
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Sandbagger SA posted:This thread is only for funny "life hacks" that don't actually work. Oh sorry, how's this: meet up with a curvy AI goonette? Phone fucked around with this message at 20:12 on Mar 2, 2015 |
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Mar 2, 2015 20:10
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slidebite posted:The best way to warm up a really cold engine is to immediately keep it reving at about 5K RPM after the cold start. You'll be ready to drive away in as little as a couple minutes minutes with warm air coming out of the heat vent. There's a really old guy who owns an early 80's XJ Cherokee near my office that does this. He's probably in his very late 70's and only moves the Jeep once a week for street cleaning. His process is that he shuffles to the car, probably floors the gas pedal because that's how his pappy taught him back before WW2, cranks the engine over, then holds the gas pedal to the floor for about a minute before finally just turning the car around and parking on the other side of the street. Somehow that thing still runs. Not somehow, it's probably an AMC 4.0.
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Mar 2, 2015 20:44
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BoostCreep posted:
If your AMC 4.0 runs out of oil in the desert, just top it off with sand and keep going
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Mar 2, 2015 21:29
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Phone posted:Oh sorry, how's this: meet up with a curvy AI goonette? I have heard for many that this works out well.
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Mar 3, 2015 00:14
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When you run out of washer fluid, just fill the tank with soapy water or in a pinch, antifreeze.
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Mar 3, 2015 00:26
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Put Seafoam in all of your car's liquids once per year. Oil, gas, coolant, windshield washer, transmission, diff, brake fluid, the flat half-empty big gulp wedged between the seat and the make-car-smell-funny handle. Also wash your car with a 50/50 blend of Seafoam and Amsoil.
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Mar 3, 2015 00:27
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Use aircraft remover to get rid of those tough stains on your paint. It's an automobile, not an aircraft so it'll be safe. SAAB and Koenigsegg owners use caution, first test on an inconspicuous area.
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Mar 3, 2015 00:35
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Bajaha posted:Use aircraft remover to get rid of those tough stains on your paint. It's an automobile, not an aircraft so it'll be safe. On a related note, if you are ever out driving and come across an airplane blocking the road, using airplane remover on it is the fastest and most economically safe way to clear the way.
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Mar 3, 2015 00:48
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kastein posted:When you run out of washer fluid, just fill the tank with ... antifreeze.  Can you let it go already?
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Mar 3, 2015 03:51
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Sanitize your engine by adding bleach to your oil!
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Mar 3, 2015 04:15
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If a stop sign has a white border that means it's optional.
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Mar 3, 2015 07:09
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Rhyno posted:If a stop sign has a white border that means it's optional. *stoptional
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Mar 3, 2015 07:15
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Once the check engine light comes on for one code it doesn't get any brighter for more codes so just leave your gas cap off and don't worry about it
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Mar 3, 2015 14:32
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Never buy a motorcycle or you'll feel guilty when you drive the car to work every day.
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Mar 3, 2015 19:19
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Rhyno posted:If a stop sign has a white border that means it's optional. Stop signs with white fridge are subject to admiralty law and are not enforceable.  Bajaha posted:*stoptional HAHA - I thought I was the only one who said that.
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Mar 3, 2015 19:21
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The best way to get your plastic light lenses, instrument cluster covers, and dash displays to really shine is to clean them with pure acetone.Sandbagger SA posted:Stop signs with white fridge are subject to admiralty law and are not enforceable. Freemen on the Land Rover.
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Mar 3, 2015 22:52
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Buy your next used car at night sight unseen so then you have an excuse for when your friends laugh at the pile of garbage you stand up for.
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Mar 4, 2015 02:46
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have sex with men that way you wont have kids
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Mar 4, 2015 03:06
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Drive with your high-beams on during the day to maximize your visibility to other people.
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Mar 4, 2015 03:08
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It's good to have your alignment off a bit, so that if the person in front of you slams on their brakes you just need to to take your hands off the wheel to avoid the collision.
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Mar 4, 2015 03:59
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If you live in the rust belt, cover your entire car with WD40 twice a week.
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Mar 4, 2015 04:08
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| # ? May 2, 2024 20:27 |
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leica posted:If you live in the north, cover your entire car with WD40 twice a week. get it right. loosen the valve cover bolts.
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Mar 4, 2015 04:09
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