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HMS Boromir posted:The problem with this sort of system is that they're apparently prone to false positives, and the more you try to make it into a shame engine for pirates the worse it's going to be for the guy who has it bug out on him. More importantly it's not a matter of "if" it breaks but rather "when." Give any piece of software enough time and it's guaranteed to fail.
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Mar 13, 2015 21:47
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Ugly In The Morning posted:I think that was the Game Dev Tycoon one, where people got super mad they'd lose because of all their games being pirated. The depressing side of that was apparently they made the game ping their servers based on which version was being played and it turned out that like 90% of the people playing it had stolen t. I think the people that made World of Goo complained about similar things. The number of legit copies of it being played at any given moment was in the single digits of percent. As much as game culture likes to talk about how much they adore people that makes games it seems that a large number of them really just want everything handed to them free and with a rider of "go ahead and call in death threats if you want, we don't mind."
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Mar 16, 2015 21:47
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Cleretic posted:Making the Blitzball tutorial one of the hardest Blitzball games is a troll by itself, you barely get given the opportunity to learn the game before you lose it. I seem to remember  STAR PLAYER OF THE ZANARKAND ABES Tidus's skills also being pretty balls except for kicking. Like not only was your team absolute rear end but Tidus was only good on offensive plays which meant if you never got the opportunity to make one you were just kind of hosed. It was also pretty hard to actually get him in position to make a play either because his other stats were utter poo poo.
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Mar 18, 2015 19:05
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Jibo posted:The microscope puzzle. It was basically a hosed up version of Go or Reversi or Othello or whatever against a program that always knows the optimal moves. It was also completely optional. Try beating the boss of world 7 with that thing in your underwear. The masterful troll was that the bracelet is enormously powerful in the first few worlds but makes the latter ones ludicrously difficult.
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Mar 20, 2015 08:22
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Dr Pepper posted:There isn't a non-undead boss in the game that can't be killed by Level 5 Death. I'm pretty sure the whole point of FF5 was to see all the ways you could hideously break that game over your knee. That game was a twinker's paradise with all the insane minmaxing you could do.
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May 5, 2015 02:22
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bucketmouse posted:Is there a writeup somewhere about what went wrong and why people are so bitter? Doublefine made promises that were impossible to deliver. That's it, really.
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May 6, 2015 06:15
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Shwqa posted:Exactly. Doublefine is the ulimate troll game developer. They have interesting concepts but make garbage games. None of their games are actually fun to play. And yet they still have a good name. Psychonauts is one of the best games I've ever played. ... That's the only Doublefine game I've ever played.
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May 6, 2015 19:13
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The problem with early access is that you have hordes of nerds promising the world their craziest impossible fever dreams and then finding out that what they wanted to do was far harder than they anticipated or in fact actually impossible. Some guys go the "take the money and run" route but the other snag is that you can't make a $90,000,000 game on a $250,000 kickstarter budget.
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May 6, 2015 22:29
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Didn't anybody learn from the X10 debacle? Creating adverts that infuriate the customer is kind of counter-productive.
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May 9, 2015 21:49
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Sleeveless posted:Tell that to all the boot-lickers who keep defending ads and pay-to-win bullshit in mobile games with the exhortation that you don't have to spend any money if you don't want to, up to and including the point where every mobile game is a glorified slot machine based more on giving people just the right amount of feedback to make them spend money so they can keep watching bars fill up and tapping on them. Pay to win is a completely different beast than adverts, though. Granted I can kind of see adverts within mobile games being similar to mass spam mail. Everybody has a cell phone these days so they're just bombarding the wall with poo poo and waiting for some of it to stick. If any of it sticks they say it was worth it. edit: brb i'm going to go program mobile games with no ads it will be a gold mine
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May 9, 2015 22:36
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Davfff posted:What's this X10 debacle? X10 was a camera company that was basically the first extremely invasive popup/popunder advertising campaign in the early days of the internet. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/X10_Wireless_Technology Their adverts as well as their product was kind of scummy; they advertised tiny cameras you could use to take pictures of people discretely. The adverts were frequently popunders that you might not have noticed right when they popped up promising that you could use their product to take pictures of attractive women. They were aggravating and scummy as hell. In the end a large number of people really, really hated the company and made a point to NOT buy their products, ever. X10 got a lot of traffic but they also got a lot of hate. Whether it was worth it or not may or may not be seen yet but the company also declared bankruptcy a few years ago. ToxicSlurpee has a new favorite as of 03:46 on May 10, 2015 |
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May 10, 2015 03:40
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Xad posted:That all sounds perfect, considering the ending of the movie it's based on. Yeah I kind of want to play this game now. Only Monty Python could make that massive of a troll still be fun to play and amusing. This is the same group that declared that the sole purpose of The Meaning of Life was "to offend absolutely everybody." I don't think I've ever seen any entertainment group that had quite as much overt disdain for the people they were supposedly entertaining. I think Cleese had a lot to do with that; one thing other Pythons said was that "he never wanted to be liked." You watch the guy in interviews and you can tell he just does not give a single poo poo.
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May 18, 2015 10:48
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The last EA game I bought was Spore. After that nonsense I decided to never buy an EA game ever again. I considered the new SimCity but waited until it came out. It was so bad I was tempted to throw EA a few dollars buying it just because of how amusing the thread it spawned here was. I didn't though; still haven't given money to EA for anything. Like it or not EA is a lovely company.
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May 18, 2015 20:19
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LawfulWaffle posted:My personal favorite Phantasy Star troll is in PSII. The telephone, I think it is? You need to bring a certain character to a certain store and they will steal the phone, which I think lets you save away from clone lab/save point. It's pretty far into the game and one-hundred percent missable, so just imagine the notion of developers saying "Yes, it would be nice if the players could save where ever they want, but we should make it incredibly difficult to achieve this effect. Even the first dungeon areas are an incredible slog that can take multiple trips there and back to level and gain money, and it's possible to die and lose an hour or so of progress because you got lost on the world map and a giant frog vomited on you. No the worst troll of that was that damned maze island that was very hard to find in the first place. You had to get the hovercraft then gently caress around in the ocean to find it. Then once you got there it was this bizarre maze of doors that teleported you to the weirdest places. You had to get to the top to get to these plants to get leaves from them but all but one of them were fake. I think there was 8 of them? God help you if you picked the wrong one; you had to climb back down to the beginning most of the time. Of course your HP and TP were being used so you'd have to plan on multiple trips. As much as I like that game in retrospect I think the entire damned thing was one gigantic troll.
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May 26, 2015 17:05
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Ryoshi posted:Gamebryo has been used in so many cool games it's really funny when idiots use it as the reason Bethesda games are buggy pieces of poo poo. I think the funniest thing is people complaining about large games being buggy garbage when every large program is buggy garbage. Almost all small programs are also buggy garbage. What I'm saying is "all code is bad" so bitching that the game only works as intended 99% of the time is a bit unfair.
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Nov 28, 2015 07:14
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The ultimate source of the carp bug was because carp got a default bite attack in one way or another. I think it may have even been deliberate as some species of carp do in fact have a nasty bite. However carp were not intended to actually be dangerous but thanks to their having a bite attack they were considered to be armed. Civilian dwarves at the time basically always responded to danger by making GBS threads themselves and running away. Even carp that weren't swole as hell or even tiny, baby ones were still terrifying because they had a weapon of some sort. A carp didn't even need to bite a dwarf to kill him. Dwarves were notorious for seeing a carp in the river, panicking, and fall off of something/ falling into a different body of water and drowning. Hunters would also expend all of their ammo trying to hit a carp with a crossbow, completely depleting your ammo stores before you even noticed. The military was also not even immune from the carp fuckery. They would also expend their ammo or dive into the river to fight the carp only to drown. Carp in the river was probably one of the greatest challenges to overcome in those versions of DF. If only it were possible to domesticate them. Alas. Of course they've mostly since been fixed but Dwarf Fortress, being Dwarf Fortress, has developed new sorts of insanity over the years. Carp weren't even the worst thing to deal with undead. That was whales.
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Nov 29, 2015 10:17
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Gestalt Intellect posted:Wasn't there a bug in dwarf fortress at one point where an extra digit got put in by accident, so anytime a turkey laid an egg they would lay 11 at once The most insane egg bug was when Toady wanted to see if he could have things lay things other than eggs. He forgot to turn it off and released a version where geese (only geese, specifically) laid iron thrones. Everything else laid eggs normally but geese shat chairs. Aesop Poprock posted:Did they basically end up being like forgotten beasts, except probably schools of them? Generally only a few of them would show up but the problem was that whales are massive so the skeletons would be huge. They'd just plain crush anything that got near them with their sheer size and swat dwarves away like dolls. The other issue was that bone parts that were chopped off of skeletal undead would get up and turn into another thing so you'd have whale parts loving everywhere making a mess of the place. They were also effectively impossible to kill thanks to this and their sheer size. Dwarf Fortress is completely insane and Toady is a goddamned national treasure for making it.
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Nov 29, 2015 20:48
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Dr_Amazing posted:It would be a minor thing until they fixed it. Then every brony and MRA would be complaining. Hell there were people complaining that there were female soldiers in the game at all. There's also an achievement for finishing a mission with a squad made entirely of women. I can't help but get the feeling this was put in specifically to troll MRAs.
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Jan 21, 2016 10:03
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Hyperlynx posted:But... the original game had female soldiers that were identically statted to male soldiers as well! They're criticising a remake for doing the same thing as the original Never underestimate the ability of Reddit MRAs to get irrationally angry over the stupidest poo poo possible.
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Jan 22, 2016 16:13
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Phlegmish posted:I'd never heard of that game before and I can imagine why It's actually a pretty good game. The fact that it came out in the 90's and people still play it is kind of a testament to how good it ultimately is. It's also a merciless bastard of a game. There are actually later game quests that have rewards that gently caress you up something fierce. See, like any good RPG there are good NPCs and there are bad NPCs. I won't spoil anything but you can attack absolutely anything in the game that's alive. This is frequently a bad idea (some of the friendly things in the starting towns will wreck a new player every time pretty much guaranteed) but the possibility is always there. Now, there is also corruption. The idea of the game is that Chaos came to the world and is loving everything up. Corruption is bad. Too much corruption and you lose. You don't die exactly but if you get too far gone you're done. Some items corrupt you if you so much as possess them. There is an NPC that gives you a few quests to kill useful NPCs and rewards you with items that corrupt the gently caress out of you. One of them is a shield; specifically the shield with the best numbers in the game. However, the corruption is generally not worth it and the person you have to kill to get it is generally somebody you want to keep alive. It looks nice on the outside given how ridiculous its numbers are and can fool new players that don't know how badly corrupty items corrupt you.
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May 31, 2016 11:38
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Regalingualius posted:How badly does Corruption gently caress you over, outta curiosity? It depends. It really, really does. Few corruptions are purely beneficial. Some are a mixed bag. Some actually totally prevent you from doing certain things. There is a corruption, for example, that makes poison drip from your hands and makes it so every single attack you make poisons the target. However, it curses everything you eat, making it less nutritious, and turns every potion you touch into poison, even while you go to drink it. Another one makes it far more difficult to talk to useful NPCs. Another one makes it almost impossible to use wands because you just drain all the charges out of the ones you touch. Generally speaking they're a mixed bag; they typically benefit you in one way while harming you in others. However, you also need a certain pair of corruptions to get into a certain (non-essential) area of the game and there are times where you must be sufficiently corrupted to do something. However, there is background corruption in many areas and if you pass a certain point you turn into a "writhing mass of primal chaos" and the game ends in a loss. For certain types of endings you have to walk this weird balancing act between "way hell of corrupted" and "welp chaos owns you now better luck next time."
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May 31, 2016 19:43
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Speaking of ADOM, there's this loving thing: http://ancardia.wikia.com/wiki/Black_tome_of_Alsophocus So, for those that haven't played the game, you learn spells by reading books. You have a certain number of points relating to each spell that represents your knowledge. The more you know about a spell the cheaper it is to cast it. The returns are diminishing and this only really matters much when your knowledge is low. Now, every time you cast a spell your knowledge goes down. Most books you'll find drop randomly; casty classes (wizards especially) get way more out of reading than other classes. Now, if you didn't encounter a book you probably can't cast the spell. This book gives you knowledge in a random spell every time you read it. However, it's very little. Still...it's an artifact! That means it's indestructible! It just hangs around and you can read it at your leisure and learn all the spells slowly, right? Sounds really great if you're not a wizard, right? loving wrong. This book corrupts you if you're carrying it. It corrupts you even more if you sit down to read it. That's it. This is all it does. Now, here's another thing...if you make your god happy you can pray for free artifacts and get them. There are certain dungeon features that guarantee you at least one artifact. Sounds pretty good, right? Well there are no easy ways to get random artifacts (some of the guaranteed ones aren't that difficult but are generally mediocre at best) and sometimes you'll get this drat thing instead of something useful. So you put forth all that effort only to find out that you get this pile of garbage.
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Jun 2, 2016 12:38
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FruitNYogurtParfait posted:that wiki says you can learn a random spell when you read it It gives you a few points in a random spell every time you read it. However, those few points aren't good for many casts and those casts are going to be hell of expensive. You have to read yourself into chaos goo to get any sort of use out of the thing.
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Jun 3, 2016 04:18
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Screaming Idiot posted:It'd be weird as gently caress to see a grove of tree monsters chilling inside a factory or sewer, yeah. I don't know, it'd be a good comedy moment to find a bunch of tree monsters somewhere that you would least expect them. Like 12 of them are hanging around a cafe in the desert but they aren't hostile. You're wary at first until you realize they won't actually attack you and you can talk to them. But all they say is "can't you leave us alone? We're on vacation."
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Jun 4, 2016 13:03
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