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The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Ask me about being in Jehovah's Witnesses
 
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DontMockMySmock
Aug 9, 2008

I got this title for the dumbest fucking possible take on sea shanties. Specifically, I derailed the meme thread because sailors in the 18th century weren't woke enough for me, and you shouldn't sing sea shanties. In fact, don't have any fun ever.
If you don't believe in Hell, what are verses like Mark 9:43, Matthew 13:50, Matthew 25:46, and other verses mentioning "eternal punishment" or "eternal fire" or whatever actually talking about, in your theology?

Darth Brooks posted:

I read the Bible all the way thru

This isn't really a JW question, but just a question for anyone that's read the Bible all the way through and still ended up being Christian:

Did you really read:
  • where it talks about what kind of slaves you can have, and how it's okay to beat your slaves until they almost die
  • where God orders the genocide of various Middle Eastern peoples who were in conflict with his Israelites
  • that if a woman is raped, she must either marry her rapist or be killed
  • that disobedient children should be executed
  • Jesus saying that the way to get to Heaven is to "keep the commandments" (and not just the Big 10, but all of them, which includes the bits about rape and slavery)
  • the part in the book of Mark where Jesus himself specifically reiterates the execute-disobedient-children commandment
  • "slaves, obey your masters"
  • Jesus cursing a fig tree to wither and die for not having fruit (even though figs were not in season)
  • Jesus being racist against non-Isrealite people, who he calls "dogs" undeserving of his healing
  • a crazy fever-dream about a seven-headed monster being ridden by some sort of sex vampire
  • et cetera
and then STILL remained a Christian?

I mean, don't get me wrong, the Bible has some good stuff in it somewhere, I'm sure, but I'm pretty sure some of those things ought to be dealbreakers. (In my opinion, Hell is the worst idea in a book full of abominable ideas, so kudos for not believing in that one at least.)

Sorry if that seemed too hostile, but someone specifically calling all of that "truth" and "logic" (as you did) gets me a little het up.

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The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Ask me about being in Jehovah's Witnesses