joke_explainer posted:

They say it had been sixty nine days on the western front, and our battallion had received next to no relief. Private "Wetnightmare" Montabain seems more shellshocked than most. He saw a howitzer shell decapitate Cpl. Nomates and he went into a delusion fugue, grabbing the corpses hand and shoving it in his uniform trousers. He kept saying, 'He's masturbating! Sarge! He's just masturbating! He's not dead! He's just batin!', screaming through tears. I even heard him whisper 'Sworp' under his breath. Under different circumstances that'd be a court martial, but we're all coming apart at the seams here.