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Met posted:Hey DoggPickle, I know you feel like everyone is against you right now, but I'll go ahead and defend you by saying that was really lovely of Rurea. Thanks met. You're right and I'll just leave it alone. I'm not going to go proving him right by going all crazy over it. I just wish it wasn't the first thing I read on the Internet today. I'll admit it really mad me sad though. You guys have a good one.
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Jun 19, 2015 18:53
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| # ¿ May 14, 2024 17:12 |
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This is probably a really bad idea (and sentences starting that way never usually end well) But I JUST found out that rurea also posted that same stuff about my personal life in his confessional at the very beginning of this game, to all the viewers. To be honest, if I had known that, I would have quit the game immediately. I don't feel like that one mistake should define me, and I've really tried to make a clean start here and now I'm terribly upset that I didn't know, because I would not have made any jokes about drinking or have gotten drunk at any time during the game. (Which was twice, in two months).i drank more during this game than I have in a long time, just because I was home more and on the computer. I just wish I had known, because I joined this game to have fun and make friends, though I knew it could possibly get a little mean, but not to dredge up the past. And it's making me positively sick right now that he planted that little seed right at the beginning and then sat back and laughed as it colored people's perceptions of any dumb thing I did or anytime I got stressed out or anxious or acted weird, for two whole months, and then still felt the need to whip it out there again after the game was over. And he probably doesn't give a poo poo and still just thinks it's funny. I actually came in here this morning to apologize for my behavior last night. It was just devastating when it was zero votes. Even Mmm was expecting me to get one, which is obviously now a hilarious joke. I was pretty rude, especially to Chic Trombone, and I'm really sorry. I just got angry when you were picking on this particular trust thing when I didn't trust you at all. Not to make it worse, just to clarify why I was so mad. It just took like a day for it to sink in, and then you realize why all the assumptions that you made were wrong and all the stuff you should have done differently, and how everybody else has feelings too and blah blah blah, but it's really a bit of a mystery while you're in there, and when things come out alien to you at first, you're like what the heck?! Fast luck showed me his final tribal, and drat I got off easy in the end. I'm glad that I made some friends, but overall, if I had known that he posted that, I wish someone would have told me because I would not have played from the beginning and someone else could have had my spot. I was actually feeling like kind of proud that I put myself out there, and even if I looked like an idiot, than that's ok, because I've gotten so much better with my fear of awkwardness and that's a good thing, but now I feel like the entire thing was just ruined. And now I'm super uncomfortable, and I wish I'd never done it at all. I'm sorry to get all emo here. You can just ignore me, but the hardest thing that I live with every day is that I really was an insanely smart person. It actually doesn't matter who believes what, or exactly how smart I really was - because of one stupid mistake, I will never be as quick or as smart as I used to be for the rest of my life. So I have never called myself a genius, or pretended I was super smart, because I'm not anymore, and that was part of why I was scared to play all these quick, young people, so I hope you feel really happy for reminding me. You win, you got me to cry. The thing here at the end, I could handle, but the knowledge afterward that it's been there all along, as people watched me do stupid things, best troll ever. But guess what? You might have made me cry, but this insane drunken idiot - voted your skanky rear end out out of this game. Mine's better. Now I'm gonna go get drunk. 
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Jun 20, 2015 03:25
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I found your explanations really interesting Anoni. It's really fun to see how other people were thinking when things were going on. I know I kinda lost it last night, and I apologize. That was a real emotional roller coaster within 24 hours. I never want to be the center of attention for something like that, but I let him get under my skin. I'm not sad that I played. I had fun, a lot of stressful fun, but it was worth it. Screw that guy lol. People might disagree that I made it to the end on my own (with no exit strategy lol) but I know I did, and that's pretty cool for never seeing this game before. I'm a really big survivor fan, but it's a lot different when you're actually doing it, and it's different simply because literally anyone could be talking at any time, and it's not like you can catch them sneaking off together. I'm also happy to explain why I thought anything stupid I did was actually a good idea at the time, or how I perceived an actual agreement apparently very differently than others. And I had some questions for other people if they feel like answering. But I'm here. I had fun. I'm chill now. The big reason I got along with Mmm so well during the game was that he really liked to talk specific strategy (or knew that I did) and that was a HUGE part of the fun I had during the whole thing. Probably the big question I guess...WHY TAKE MMM AT FINAL FOUR? He didn't talk me into taking him to the end. It was like 10% honestly he just deserves it for how much effort he put in (like just on a personal level), 40% it sticks with my strategy of being an honest player and keeping my word and 50%, if I drop him now, I'll be going back on my word, everyone will think I lucked into that final win in the crappiest way possible, and they'll just be pissed I voted out baby Jesus and just vote for imgay or anoni at random. LOL. So I was kinda stuck, because of some circumstances of my own making.
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Jun 20, 2015 19:39
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MMM Whatchya Say posted:I wouldn't argue that I talked you into taking me at the final 4. I'd argue that I talked my way into an alliance and convinced you to stay bound to it, much before the final 4. The situations you're describing of you not wanting to go back on that were a result of our earlier alliance and conversations. I'd say that your best move was allowing me to keep thinking that since I kept my promises that people would respect that. Or at the very least not laughing at me for it. Like, if I had any idea that Garth would be mad at me or that my actions would be perceived as sneaky, or going around the rules, I would have known that I was now a villain. If you'd corrected that notion at any time, obviously, it would have put you in danger. I mean, I didn't know why chic and Garth considered me part of an alliance at all. They never came to me and asked me for anything specific, or talked any strategy at all. That's the important part there. If someone doesn't share their game plan past the next vote, then they're not really trying to play with you. So I just sat there at the end of the kill off the sexies Skype group, after the merge, and as long as they kept just telling me stuff.... Well ok. Like, what are you guys doing? I mean, what was I gonna say? I think I shouldn't be here in this group anymore? On the one hand, it felt kind of insulting, like I didn't really matter enough to make a formal alliance after the merge, ,lol but on the other hand, I was happy to play possum. But at the same time, it was like they sorta just gave orders whenever there was a vote, and as long as it aligned with my interests, I was like "okay". And when it didn't I tried to get them to change it to go my way. I almost had the vote off of Mmm and onto jato, til Narcotics talked to chic, and that's how you guys both lost your idols. At the time though, I had zero idea they considered it a formal thing without asking me at all. (Garth did come to me earlier and asked for an alliance but at the time, I had too many things going on, and I really wanted to play with Garth, but I just made the no-vote deal to save my rear end in case we lost again before the merge) But I not mad lol.  well played. Still the most fun person to talk to like the entire time. And a good win
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Jun 20, 2015 21:01
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garthoneeye posted:I played assuming you continuing with us was in your best interests. I never considered that asking you for a formal alliance would cause you to play against your best interests, so I never thought you wanted or needed it. Oh I get it afterwards. I mean I get why nobody liked my idea in the end. It's still something that I personally would respect. I felt like it was a good way to make a specific deal that was mutually beneficial, unless you could figure out a way get rid of it, when it was no longer useful to you. but I'm definitely not going around in circles about it with everybody again hahaha. It's very clear that I didn't understand how others would see it. no argument here.Yeah it was just that sticking with you guys wasn't for me. I could not trust chic at all, and I felt like I'd be the bottom of that three for sure, plus Mmm was my only formal alliance since day 1 and imgay and anoni were literally the other people I talked to first in the whole game. I was talking to Mmm and Anoni almost every day and Imgay less often. Plus where you and chic would stay voting as a twosome, Mmm, anoni and imgay were very much individual actors, with more room for me to play around with the dynamics. (I'm not saying I was great at it or anything lol). Plus you guys wanted to vote anoni and I wasn't gonna do that no matter what, so it was the time to pick one side or the other. Just know that even though you feel like it's semantics, that I respected you and I kept my word not just for the game but because I would not go back on my word to you (I hope that means something)
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Jun 20, 2015 22:10
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Adus posted:the thing i'll say is that when you first posted about this in the survivor TVIV thread. i was the first one to respond and i told you what i though was the best advice: read the previous threads and vistas I tried to, but I just didn't have that much time. I mean, yes I could have maybe read through Three or four seasons completely, but I felt like it would be like ... How do I put this... Learning say Japanese as an adult, and understanding the words, but never really grasping the underlying meanings.. Does that make sense? I read around maybe 2 in total, but in different parts, and then decided that it definitely wasn't the same as watching it in real time, or understanding which of these people already knew or other, and not getting a lot of the references, and as far as the vistas, I thought if I read one, then I wouldn't want to play anymore. Hahaha. So it wasn't laziness, but. I get what you're saying. Mmm spent hours studying and practicing for every challenge and that helped him a lot. That wasn't really an option for me, because I just plain didn't have the capability to beat him In Anything like that, no matter how much I practiced. Arrrgghh the tribe name. I drew that flag but the name is not my fault! It wrote it as a placeholder but nobody would step up and pick something. I love the name weregays but it's like 1 persons name, and that doesn't seem like a cool thing to do.
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Jun 20, 2015 22:22
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garthoneeye posted:You keep saying you felt you were on the bottom of the 3 (not true because I was more scared of Chic than you in FTC), but how does that really matter when there is a Final 3? Just afraid of the final four outsider winning immunity? More like, did I want to sit next to chic and Mmm or you and Mmm at the end? I don't think so. My goat status would have been hilariously worse. I mean you have to give yourself some chance of getting votes in your head, but the jury was so mixed up, was there ANY choice I could have made at that point where I get more votes? The only people left were my three og friends and two people who I'd been stuck together with the longest. I guess that's a lot of words for bottom of three meaning the dog in the group. You just said you were more scared of Chic hahah. Anyways this game is complicated and I did not expect to get nearly that far, so it's not like I didn't think ahead but sometimes I just didn't have any good options. Mmm did a good job in the early weeks getting rid of people that wouldn't vote for him before they could make it to jury, but I was still getting my footing and figuring out Skype  I was trying to push the all swole thing really hard, because that left people no sexies to hide behind or to put on the jury by making a too small alliance and then feeling bad when they got voted out. Hahah but unfortunately because we lost so much, we did that, then they still kicked out a sexy first, then we lost again, and it wasn't till all those tribals that they voted a swole, so it was pretty late on when i had to switch up entirely, and think of the whole thing in a new pattern. Which I sucked at hahaha!
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Jun 20, 2015 22:43
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Silly Burrito posted:In the end, Doggpickle, it's ultimately meant be a fun game to play on the forums. Don't let it get in your head too much. Remember the fun times you had with it, and follow along with the next edition, whenever that happens. Yeah I'm good now man thanks! It was just heartbreaking to lose but I got over it over night lol, but then-you-know who came in the next day and put me down again. No big deal It was cool. I would warn anyone trying to for the first time that it is a huge commitment! I'll be happy to watch the next one. I think since nobody knew me, and I didn't know what I was doing, it both led to me getting farther, but also ultimately to me losing pretty hilariously. It was fun! It just took a day to realize that I really do love Surivivor though, so playing it from the inside was really different and interesting. There is a true mental difference in how you think it feels to not know what is going on for sure, and to actually NOT know what is going on for sure. Hahaha
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Jun 21, 2015 01:36
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AnonymousNarcotics posted:Hey dogg remember when you were being all self-righteous about how you never went back on your word? Check out this quote from your own confessional Hey you're right. I forgot I said that. I never said I should have won lol hahahaha. I'm cool with what happened now. I only knew you for one day, and in that time, you wrecked all the work I did to get the vote off of Mmm and onto jato, by going behind my back and contacting chic and proposing an alliance that included you and Mmm, they immediately knew you two were working together lol. So that's how they justified voting for you or Mmm instead of jato, because now there was only a 50/50 chance of hitting the idol, (not knowing you both had one). Of course I was trying to get all the idols out, hahah, but I told you to play yours before the tribal, and then I also said at tribal that everyone that I know has an idol better play it. I had to vote with them to keep up appearances, but it wasn't a vote to send you home, and I never promised not to vot for you anyways. (My semantics problem again) It's true I was trying to have it both ways, but I went back and forth all day about what I was going to do, and your last minute bid for an alliance without asking me first, made all kinds of scrambling happen right before tribal. Your name had never even come up before you did that.  if you'd just asked me first, I would have been like no, no, no, no, don't do that! I know you were well liked, afterwards, and Mmm explained to me later why he wanted to take you to the end, but I just didn't get it within the short time I met you. Sorry you felt so betrayed about that.Short version - your name wasn't even on the table til you put it there yourself, then I told you twice to play your idol, you didn't trust me,you didn't play it, and you went home. My not-so-witty remark there was in the heat of the moment, but I was sort of glad not to have you on my team for the rest of the game because you didn't communicate well with me. Sorry!
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Jun 21, 2015 17:48
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See I didn't know that hahah I didn't know you were also talking to anoni and imgay about it. I played a really wish washy game and I know that. It's funny to find out later which things you knew and which things you didn't at what time. the above is how I saw it at the time. I'm not claiming I did the right thing at any time, just explaining why I did it, to the best of my memory. There's all kinds of stuff I wonder now, like when I went to Mmm about voting out Garth, had imgay really gone to him first about doing the same? Because that vote you guys wanted to vote for anoni and keep imgay? But imgay wanted to vote you at the same time. So if you had voted anoni first, you would have been gone next, because imgay would have been a better choice. Or maybe he was just playing both sides just like me? It gets a little hard to remember exactly what order things happened in. At least for me? It was a long game hahaha
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Jun 21, 2015 18:21
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AnonymousNarcotics posted:Oh so I guess when you proposed a final 3 alliance with me and mmm that wasn't a promise not to vote for me. I didn't propose that. You guys came to me. I know ABSOLUTELY WITHOUT A DOUBT I remember that right. I was really really wishy washy about it. I was like, I don't know this person at all... I did agree, you are right. You're completely in the right to be mad at me. I was thinking, however, what the heck have I just done, and then a couple hours later you proposed an alliance to chic, and I was like, I've made a huge mistake here. That's why I sent you such a lovely message to play your idol. I was trying to have it both ways... To see if you could trust me, but also kind of "well if she doesn't, I'm kinda glad I got out of this one day alliance I didn't really want to be in". You're completely right. I should have just said no thanks, I don't want to join this alliance, but I didn't know how to do that and I screwed up. And then I got out of it with the most dignity I possibly could, (which was not much). If you'd played your idol, I would have gone with you guys, but I still would have had reservations and we'd have had to have big talks about doing stuff without telling the others. and when you get to ftc you have to go with some kind of theme. I didn't do a very good job, but I knew I had lost. I never meant to be self righteous, it was more that I was mad at the time that some other people actually lied more and were beating me up about it. So I got really defensive. What's done is done I didn't mean to hurt you personally. But I DID not propose that alliance. Most definitely not.
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Jun 21, 2015 18:46
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Hahah maybe now I'm thinking Mmm told you I wanted to join you and then told me the opposite and then just shoved us together. Hahahaha
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Jun 21, 2015 18:51
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garthoneeye posted:Yeah, I didn't realize that Imgay was playing for AnonIdiot at that point. If I had I would have proposed taking out Imgay. I know I keep posting a lot, but it's fascinating to find out what other people were thinking at the same time. The dynamics between imgay and anoni were really interesting. Imgay told me that he'd promised to protect Anonidiot and take him as far as possible, yet I talked to anoni a lot, and half the time, he was really worried about what kinds of things Imgay was up to, and didn't know if he could trust him. So, in some ways they were like a voting block, but in others they were just completely autonomous people. Even at the end, anoni wanted to force a tie between Mmm and Imgay (which he knew Mmm would likely win) and actually voted for imgay. Then imgay voted for Anoni at final.
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Jun 21, 2015 19:03
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Chic Trombone posted:Also for the record my kneejerk panic lie re: MMM and ANNarc was literally the only lie I ever told this game so you saying you couldn't trust me makes me laugh kinda, because I never once lied to you and also told you straight-up what was going on in our chat. Well to be fair, it wasn't a lie, but a long continuing spy operation. Do you want to know the completely stupid thing that made me really mad? Lol. You used my pinky swear on Mmm while you were playing him. I thought, after that, nothing she says can be trusted again. It was also because you started going against our first alliance as soon as the merge, which was just Mmm I guess, and I can't truly remember why. Plus, because I was confused and didn't know what was happening, I kept lying to Mmm on your behalf for like a week, in case it was some kind of ploy. Since you didn't come to me personally and ask for a new deal, I considered any deal between us as null and void. I completely understand now how the way I was thinking did not make sense to other people, but that's just how I felt then. Re: the possible votes - I would not have done at ftc what people were probably expecting, like go full on - yup I just took out every single person on the jury. So that count would have gone down. Because I never felt that way at the time. I did actually vote out every person on the jury hahaha, if you count my two throw away votes where the intent was the same. It's pretty funny to realize afterwards that if I'd just been like "yup, I voted every single one of you out, yet I caught One Vote for the entire game" that I might have possibly won. It's all water under the bridge It's hard to explain how hard it is to really quantify what is happening while you are doing it, or how other people are perceiving you. It's humbling! I'm not brave enough to read the vista and I have no plans to do so lol. I also think that reading confessionals Is kind of misleading, like I know for me at least, I didn't keep a log of my posts, so they might not have made sense from one to the next, plus they're really like a snapshot in time, whereas the game is running 24/7 in your head and a million different thoughts might have happened in between or the general feeling you had probably didn't come through entirely. I'm definitely going to be watching the next one! 
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Jun 22, 2015 00:24
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Propaganda Machine posted:I know that in my season, my early confessionals come off like I was an arrogant prick. Haha this is a great post like I said, I'll be happy to watch the next one, and I'm proud I did it at all, but I sure as hell won't be doing it again!
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Jun 22, 2015 20:14
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I know everyone laughs at the Lonely Island remix parody, but since I watched this live  , it's still the first thing I think of when I hear Mmm's name http://youtu.be/rYIb-acZwk4
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Jun 27, 2015 02:46
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| # ¿ May 14, 2024 17:12 |
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Eight Dollars posted:I think someone under the radar can absolutely win, but there's a different between being under the radar and seeming like you didn't do anything strategy-wise but get pulled with the current (not saying this was you Anon!). In order to do so you'd have to make at least a few moves you could source, maybe go in with a few goats you can say you did better than and, most important of all, play entirely with the jury in mind - connecting with people who you know will remain steady for you by the end through your connections. It'd be tough and you absolutely couldn't go in there finals with a player who dominated, but it could happen! Basically, do exactly what I did, but go into final tribal like "oh yeah I just voted you all out beotches!". Also don't take mmm to the final
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Jul 2, 2015 01:36
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