Let's Play the Grailquest series! (If this kills you, go to 14.)

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Let's Play! > Let's Play the Grailquest series! (If this kills you, go to 14.)

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FredMSloniker: Jan 2, 2008; Why, yes, I do like Kirby games.

Mikl posted:

Even if you can't manage to decode the message there's still hope. Think. There is a way to get the key to the cypher. It's been mentioned before.

I take it you're referring to the portable decoder in Merlin's place? I'll let other folks have a crack at solving the cipher, but if no one manages it, then that's what I suggest.

# ? Mar 12, 2016 12:01

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# ? May 3, 2024 14:26

SOLarian: Oct 29, 2012; Pillbug

Considering that YOUR ESCAPE LIES AT NINE, I suggest we head there. (z->a, a->z ,etc then "subtract" 3)

# ? Mar 12, 2016 17:57

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

SOLarian posted:

Considering that YOUR ESCAPE LIES AT NINE, I suggest we head there. (z->a, a->z ,etc then "subtract" 3)

Correct answer?

Section 9 posted:

Indeed it does! Unbelievably simple though it may sound, all you need now do is consult your plan and pick another destination.

Correct answer! (Maybe the authors could have made a more complex cypher that couldn't be solved so easily, but there you have it.)

We already know where to go: down the stairs into the other mound, at section 105. What awaits us there?

Section 105 posted:

The steps lead downwards into a 20' x 20' lined chamber, with no discernible exit. On the wall opposite the stairs, someone has scrawled a message.

Will you approach the wall to read the message? If so, go to 135. If not, you may still return to your plan and pick another destination.

Shall we boldly step forward or shall we do something else first?

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LOCATION: Underneath Giants' Dance
LIFE POINTS: 16 / 28+1
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 6
INVENTORY: EJ (hits on a 4, +5 damage), breastplate (-2 damage), healing potion (16 doses, restores a double dice roll of LIFE POINTS), small golden disc, scap of parchment, bunch of yarrow, bolt through neck instructions, right of passage token, Coded scroll
STATUS EFFECTS: Bolt through neck (automatically kills enemies who roll a 12 against us unless they have surprise)
TREASURE: 1500 Gold Pieces

# ? Mar 13, 2016 11:54

paradoxGentleman: Dec 10, 2013; wheres the jester, I could do with some pointless nonsense right about now

Reading is good. Let's read.

# ? Mar 13, 2016 11:58

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Section 135 posted:

As you step on to the floor of the chamber, a sudden grinding noise erupts behind you. You swing round, just in time to see the stairs withdrawing upwards, sealing the room completely and leaving you trapped. With an oath too obscene and terrible to record here (except in code as follows: LS WIZG!) you turn back to the wall and the scrawled message. It reads:

'Mortal, beware. You stand at the brink. Those who enter the Kingdom of the Fairy do so at their peril. Only the bravest and most daring may venture beyond this point. Prove yourself now by defeating the Ghastly Guardian Ghoul... or die in the attempt.'

The Ghastly Guardian Ghoul? There's no Ghastly Guardian Ghoul here - just an empty chamber with no exit now the stairs have disappeared. Frowning, you read the message again, wondering vaguely if you somehow misunderstood it. But it's plain enough.

'Hello . . .' you call uncertainly. 'Any ghouls here . . . ?'

'Just one,' a soft voice whispers in your ear.

You spin round in sudden alarm. The creature before you is nearly eight feet tall with pink eyes, chalk white skin, claws, fangs, pointy ears, long arms and a natty little moustache. It is wearing a mackintosh and gumboots, doubtless torn savagely from some earlier adventurer, and carrying a mace from which drips a poisonous green slime.

It smiles. 'Welcome to the Kingdom of Horror,' it says.

This is big trouble, Pip. Don't waste your time trying for a Friendly Reaction - you should know by now you never get one from a ghoul. This particular Ghoul has exactly the same LIFE POINTS as you have, strikes on 4 or better and does +5 damage with that brutal mace. Worse still, the first successful strike it gets will poison you so that you automatically lose 3 LIFE POINTS during every combat round until the fight is over.

If the Ghoul kills you ( and it will certainly try its best) go to 14. If you kill the Ghoul, turn to 22.

Well, we were way overdue for a fight anyway. Since we're at 16 LIFE POINTS that's how many the ghoul has, too, so let's roll initiative and get this over with.

Ghoul's initiative roll: 2 + 2 = 4.
Pip's initiative roll: 3 + 6 = 9.

Pip attacks! 1 + 5 = 6, Ghoul is hit for 2 + 5 = 7 LIFE POINTS and is down to 9.
Ghoul attacks! 3 + 2 = 5, Pip is hit for 1 + 5 = 6 LIFE POINTS, is down to 10, and is poisoned.
Pip is affected by poison, and is down to 7 LIFE POINTS.

Pip attacks! 5 + 2 = 7, Ghoul is hit for 3 + 5 = 8 LIFE POINTS, is down to 1 and is knocked out.

Phew, that was way too close for comfort. Don't mind me, I'll just drink a dose of potion or two.

Potion roll: 3 + 3 = 6, up to 13 LIFE POINTS.
Potion roll: 4 + 2 = 6, up to 19.
Potion roll: 6 + 5 = 11, back at full health (29).

...Or three :v:

we've got plenty, for now.

And our rewards for killing this monstrosity is...

Section 22 posted:

Oh no, it's getting up again!

You definitely killed the thing, but it's getting up again! And changing.

An incredible metamorphosis is occurring. The Ghoul's ghastly chalk white skin is turning silver! And its fangs are retracting, its arms growing shorter, its ...

In stark contrast with the Ghastly Ghoul, the creature now standing before you is one of the most beautiful you have ever seen - a tall, slim, blue-robed, silver- skinned humanoid with an aura of power around him that absolutely precludes any question of your renewing your attack (even if you had the energy). His eyes - twin orbs of silver, flecked with gold - regard you gravely.

'You did well to kill my alter ego, Pip,' he says. 'And by doing so, you have proven yourself worthy to enter the Fairy Kingdom which for some becomes the Kingdom of Horror. Your quest is known to me, and it is a noble aim. But I say this to you: to achieve your goal, you must travel widely, search everywhere, equip yourself well and use your head as often as your sword arm. To aid you, I make you this gift...'

And he takes from a fold of his robe a small silver sphere.

'This artifact,' he says, 'must never leave you. Hold it to you even in death. Its value is 100,000 golden pieces, but you must never sell it or attempt it as a bribe. This is a Sphere of Warning. It may be used only in the Faity Kingdom. Take it in your hand.'

Hesitantly, you stretch your hand and the silver creature drops the sphere into your palm. At once the sphere glows green.

'When the sphere glows green, you are in no immediate danger. When it glows amber, some danger threatens. When it glows red, great danger threatens. But most of all, should the sphere begin to glow golden, then the great sword you seek is close by.' Your tall companion folds his arms. 'And now the time has come . . . '

He closes his eyes in silent meditation. A spiral of clear blue light erupts from somewhere near his feet and begins to curl upwards, spinning faster and faster. The light expands, swirling around you until it is all you can see.

For a moment your senses are disrupted, then the light fades and the silver skinned creature is gone. So too is the stone lined chamber. You look around you in amazement.

As you well might, since you are now standing in 58.

Trial by combat, eh? The worst kind of trial, if you ask me :colbert:

Section 58 posted:

You are standing within a megalithic ring - but one very different from the henge at Salisbury Plain. There are fewer stones and those are smaller and more ancient.

All around you, stretching as far as the eye can see, is a vast wilderness. High above you the sun shines brightly in a clear green sky.

Green?

You look up again. The sky is definitely green (and the sun, now you come to notice it, has a distinct violet tinge.) Wherever you are, you are certainly not in Avalon, quite possibly not even in the known world.

But wherever you are, it's pointless staying put. You can move off in any one of eight directions (N,S,E,W,NE,NW,SE,SW). (Perhaps the map of the Fairy Kingdom might be useful, if you happen to have it with you.)

To go North turn to 11.
To go South turn to 17.
To go East turn to 24.
To go West turn to 92.
To go North-east turn to 35.
To go North-west turn to 48.
To go South-east turn to 67.
To go South-west turn to 80.

Here's the map again, for your convenience.

Which way do we go?

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LOCATION: Entrance to the Kingdom of Horror
LIFE POINTS: 29 / 28+1
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 7
INVENTORY: EJ (hits on a 4, +5 damage), breastplate (-2 damage), healing potion (13 doses, restores a double dice roll of LIFE POINTS), small golden disc, scap of parchment, bunch of yarrow, bolt through neck instructions, right of passage token, Coded scroll, Sphere of Warning (glows green - no danger, amber - some danger, red - deathly danger, golden - Excalibur is near)
STATUS EFFECTS: Bolt through neck (automatically kills enemies who roll a 12 against us unless they have surprise)
TREASURE: 1500 Gold Pieces

Mikl fucked around with this message at 23:42 on Mar 15, 2016

# ? Mar 14, 2016 19:55

theamazingchris: Feb 1, 2016; : D

I've got an itch to see the world's edge. Let's go north.

# ? Mar 14, 2016 20:08

inflatablefish: Oct 24, 2010

theamazingchris posted:

I've got an itch to see the world's edge. Let's go north.

Nah, we'll only fall off. Let's go South to ~~Definitelynotacid~~ Tingletaste Lake.

# ? Mar 14, 2016 20:51

Carbon dioxide: Oct 9, 2012

theamazingchris posted:

I've got an itch to see the world's edge. Let's go north.

Agreed.

# ? Mar 15, 2016 22:59

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Section 11 posted:

It is rugged going under a hot sun. Around you stretches the Wilderness, rough ground and shrub, broken here and there by looming rock. You tramp for miles, growing more and more hungry until you are almost fainting for lack of a jam buttie or a bag of crisps.

You stop, prop your back against a rock and come to a decision.

You have to eat. If you are equipped with rations, munch some now and go north to 19 or south to 58. If not, you must take the chance of returning to Merlin's House in search of rations. Should you fail to arrive in the Equipment Room, your situation is so desperate that you must ignore any goodies which may be in the room you enter and try again for rations. And keep trying until you get rations or are killed. If this little jaunt kills you, go to 14. If you get your rations, eat something fast, then go north to 19 or south to 58.

So now we're forced to roll to get to Merln's house. Let's do this.

Roll: 1

Well, you wanted to see what happens if we roll unlucky, didn't you? :v:

Merlin's House Section 1 posted:

Not the best of all possible results. Since the 1 spot represents the underside of Merlin's house, you are now trapped in the solid basalt of the Welsh Mountains. If you hold your breath, you may actually survive for anything up to four minutes. After that, you can go quietly to 14.

Death the first: encased in basalt :siren:

That's... unfortunate. Let's do this again, after rolling for LIFE POINTS.

Rolls: 5 + 5 = 10, 5 + 1 = 6, 6 + 4 = 10, and we have 41 LIFE POINTS.

Now, Merlin's house roll: 1. Crud.

:siren:

Death the second: encased in basalt. Again. :siren:

Once more. LIFE POINT rolls: 4 + 5 = 9, 6 + 5 = 11, 2 + 6 = 8, and we have 45 LIFE POINTS.

Merlin's house roll: 6. That's a bad one too, right?

Merlin's House Section 6 posted:

More trouble! Since the 6 spot is painted on the roof of Merlin's House, you crash through the ceiling for the loss of half your current LIFE POINTS.

To add insult to injury, you have landed in Merlin's bathroom which contains nothing more useful than a toothbrush.

Return to the section you were in when you rolled the die.

Yep. Still not as bad as an instant death, though. Let's try once again.

Merlin's house roll: 4. This is the room with the bed, but unfortunately we have to ignore this one.

Merlin's house roll: 2. This is the roll we wanted. Let's take a look a the equipment.

Appendix V posted:

EQUIPMENT

1. Axe
2. Bandages
3. Boots
~~4. Breastplate (-2 on damage)~~
5. False Beard and Moustache
6. Hammer
7. Harp
~~8. Healing Potion~~
9. Healing Salve (1 Jar)
10. Knife
11. Lantern
12. Lute
13. Lyre
14. Mallet
15. Map of Fairy Kingdom (page 217)
16. Nails (Half Pound)
17. Parchment (5 Sheets)
18. Pipes of Pan
19. Powdered Ink
20. Pumpkin
21. Quartz Crystal
22. Quill Pen
23. Rations (Week's Supply)
24. Rope (50 Feet Coil)
25. Sack of Grain
26. Sandals
27. Saw
28. Sheepskin Jacket
29. Spikes (One Doz.)
30. String (100 Feet Ball)
31. Tinderbox
32. Waterbag (Full)
33. Wooden Plank (20 Feet Long)

Gonna take the rations as per Section 11, the second item is up to you guys. Now, where were we going? Oh yeah, north.

Section 19 posted:

The Wilderness hasn't changed much - still the same old shrub and rock - but you somehow feel a lot more positive about it.

Which is just as well, since you are going to have to deal with those three Barbarians riding towards you on their small, but sturdy ponies.

You glance at the silver sphere and find it has turned amber. In the Fairy Kingdom, this is your only guide to the danger you face until you make your decision to fight, run or surrender.

If you decide to run, throw one die, then turn to the section headed RUNNING on page 191.

If you decide to surrender, the Barbarians will not injure you, but they will take all your equipment, leaving any magical items (which they do not understand) and your sword (which they do not need.) To renew your equipment, you will have to return to Merlin's House. When the Barbarians have gone, you may go north to 87 or ~~south to 58~~.

If you decide to fight, turn to the section headed ENEMY STATISTICS on page 192 for details of how tough your opponents are. Should you win, turn to 65. Should they kill you, go to 14.

Alright, time for a decision. Barbarians draw near! [F]ight / [S]urrender / [R]un?

(Also, which item - besides the rations - shall we get from the storehouse?)

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LOCATION: NN
LIFE POINTS: 22 / 44+1
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 0
INVENTORY: EJ (hits on a 4, +5 damage), breastplate (-2 damage), healing potion (13 doses, restores a double dice roll of LIFE POINTS), small golden disc, scap of parchment, bunch of yarrow, bolt through neck instructions, right of passage token, Coded scroll, Sphere of Warning (glows green - no danger, amber - some danger, red - deathly danger, golden - Excalibur is near), Rations
STATUS EFFECTS: Bolt through neck (automatically kills enemies who roll a 12 against us unless they have surprise)
TREASURE: 1500 Gold Pieces

Roll of the Dead posted:

Death the first: encased in basalt.
Death the Second: encased in basalt. Again.

# ? Mar 15, 2016 23:58

paradoxGentleman: Dec 10, 2013; wheres the jester, I could do with some pointless nonsense right about now

Oh, new mechanics! Let's run

# ? Mar 16, 2016 00:05

theamazingchris: Feb 1, 2016; : D

Aaaah! Run away! :cry:

As for our second item, I want the 20 foot long wooden plank for the sheer hilarity of imagining Pip carrying it around.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 04:32

Selachian: Oct 9, 2012

To be boringly practical, the rope and lantern seem the most likely to be checked. Let's take the rope.

And run away from the barbarians.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 16:45

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Page 191 posted:

APPENDIX I

Running (See Section 17)

Roll one die.

Score 1 and your enemy/enemies catch up and kill you from behind. Go to 14.

With any other score, the magic of the Fairy Kingdom comes into play, transporting you to an unknown destination which you may, or may not, have visited before.

Score 2 and go to 87.
Score 3 and go to 29.
Score 4 and go to 76.
Score 5 and go to 99.
Score 6 and go to 38.

Simple enough! Let's roll. Roll: 2.

Section 87 posted:

This is one of the most remarkable sights you have ever seen, Pip! Only a few hundred yards in front of you, the ground simply ceases, as if you had reached a vast, descending cliff. You move forward cautiously, testing the way beneath your feet. Eventually you reach the edge and look over. The cliff face drops away further than the eye can see, dropping into the depths of Space. This is no ordinary precipice. Far below you can see faintly twinkling stars!

You have reached the edge of the world!

The problem being what you intend to do about it.

South takes you to 11.
South west takes you to 103.
South east takes you to 116.
Any other direction takes you over the edge which, if you're daft enough, you may experience by turning to 147.

Diving right off the edge would be foolish, wouldn't it? _{_{_{_{_{You know you want to.}}}}}

And we have a tie regarding which item to take from Merlin's stores: the plank or the rope. Next vote for either wins!

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LOCATION: Edge of the world
LIFE POINTS: 22 / 44+1
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 0
INVENTORY: EJ (hits on a 4, +5 damage), breastplate (-2 damage), healing potion (13 doses, restores a double dice roll of LIFE POINTS), small golden disc, scap of parchment, bunch of yarrow, bolt through neck instructions, right of passage token, Coded scroll, Sphere of Warning (glows green - no danger, amber - some danger, red - deathly danger, golden - Excalibur is near), Rations
STATUS EFFECTS: Bolt through neck (automatically kills enemies who roll a 12 against us unless they have surprise)
TREASURE: 1500 Gold Pieces

Roll of the Dead posted:

Death the first: encased in basalt.
Death the Second: encased in basalt. Again.

# ? Mar 19, 2016 00:22

Glazius: Jul 22, 2007; Hail all those who are able,
any mouse can,
any mouse will,
but the Guard prevail.; Clapping Larry

Well, let's take a rope and go over the edge?

# ? Mar 19, 2016 00:43

inflatablefish: Oct 24, 2010

Hell yes, let's jump!

Prediction: Section 147 will say something along the lines of: "Sorry, did I say 147? I meant to say 14. Go to 14."

# ? Mar 19, 2016 00:58

paradoxGentleman: Dec 10, 2013; wheres the jester, I could do with some pointless nonsense right about now

inflatablefish posted:

Hell yes, let's jump!

Prediction: Section 147 will say something along the lines of: "Sorry, did I say 147? I meant to say 14. Go to 14."

Either that, or a super-secret piece of loot that nobody ever gets because they don't walk off the edge of the world! Either way, let's check it out

# ? Mar 19, 2016 01:02

theamazingchris: Feb 1, 2016; : D

Heed the call of the void.

# ? Mar 19, 2016 03:48

Russ L: Feb 26, 2011

Jump or Pip will always wonder what might have been.

# ? Mar 19, 2016 13:00

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Alright, let's take the rope and jump off! Wheeeeeeeee_eeeeeeee...

Section 147 posted:

With one mad, suicidal step, you plunge over the edge of the world!

And fall. And float! Gently you drift downwards into the mist of distant stars, tumbling slowly over and over in a mind-numbing kaleidoscope of sensations.

Doesn't look as if you're for 14 this time, although you never can tell. But where you do end up depends on the interplay of energies at the end of the world. These energies swirl and drift, distorting time and space, so that your destination will always change each time you make the fateful plunge. Roll one die.

Score 1 and go to 29.
Score 2 and go to 76.
Score 3 and go to 13.
Score 4 and go to 99.
Score 5 and go to 58.
Score 6, hit turbulence, be ripped apart and go to 14.

...Didn't you just say we weren't destined for 14? Oh well, let's roll.

Roll: 3, we land at 13.

Section 13 posted:

You are approaching mountains. Not very big, but definitely mountains. Already you are in the foothills and climbing swiftly.

Around you, the air is growing chill and, strangely, the light is growing dim.

The ground beneath your feet has a curiously shifting feel, as if it were not quite solid. The rocks around you are twisted and distorted and while they remain still when you look at them directly, they seem to writhe when you see them from the comer of your eye.

Something gibbers softly to your right, but when you swing around, nothing is there. Distantly, ahead, there is a piercing scream, tailing off into utter silence.

Maybe you shouldn't stick around here too long, Pip. Westwards the mountains are impassable, so it's pointless going that way. Due east may or may not take you back the way you came - you will end up at 73. Due north will eventually lead you to 87. Due south takes you to 32. The bad news is that before you go anywhere, you are stuck with the effects these mountains have had on you, which is a degree of mental confusion so intense that you will automatically miss every second blow in your next three combat encounters.

Which way? (We've already seen 87, it's the edge of the world we jumped off from, but the other two are new.)

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LOCATION: Confusing mountains
LIFE POINTS: 22 / 44+1
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 0
INVENTORY: EJ (hits on a 4, +5 damage), breastplate (-2 damage), healing potion (13 doses, restores a double dice roll of LIFE POINTS), small golden disc, scap of parchment, bunch of yarrow, bolt through neck instructions, right of passage token, Coded scroll, Sphere of Warning (glows green - no danger, amber - some danger, red - deathly danger, golden - Excalibur is near), Rations, rope (50 feet)
STATUS EFFECTS: Bolt through neck (automatically kills enemies who roll a 12 against us unless they have surprise), confused by the mountains (miss every other blow in the next three fights)
TREASURE: 1500 Gold Pieces

Roll of the Dead posted:

Death the first: encased in basalt.
Death the Second: encased in basalt. Again.

Mikl fucked around with this message at 14:13 on Mar 19, 2016

# ? Mar 19, 2016 13:48

SOLarian: Oct 29, 2012; Pillbug

let's go east

# ? Mar 19, 2016 13:51

Comstar: Apr 20, 2007; Are you happy now?

Go east.

# ? Mar 20, 2016 10:28

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Section 73 posted:

The big problem with this Wilderness is that it all looks the same. Nothing but rough ground, shrub and rock as far as the eye can see.

Patiently you trudge onwards, thinking of your quest, wondering about the great sword without which Arthur can no longer hold his realm.

And so introverted have you become at this time that you fail to notice the amber glow beginning in the silver sphere.

What has occasioned that glow is a small scorpion close by your foot. Since you did not notice it, you have no opportunity to run, or roll for surprise. (And naturally, there is no question of surrendering to a scorpion.) The creature requires 6 or better to strike successfully. It does only 3 LIFE POINTS damage whatever the dice indicate, but will poison you on its first successful strike. This means that you will automatically lose 2 LIFE POINTS for every new section you enter until you munch a little yarrow, which is the only antidote for the poison of this particular breed of scorpion. Killing the scorpion should not be too difficult: it has only 8 LIFE POINTS.

Assuming you survive the scorpion for the moment (and if you don't, you should go to 14) you may go:

West, or north west to 13.
North east to 103.
East to 92.
South east to 38.
South to 53.
South west to 32.
North to 87.

Can't we just step on the scorpion? :v:

Scorpion attacks! 3 + 5 = 8, Pip is stung for 3 - 2 = 1 LIFE POINT, is down to 21 and is poisoned.
Pip attacks! 1 + 4 = 5, Scorpion is hit for 1 + 5 = 6 LIFE POINTS and is swatted away, unconcious.

Now let's munch on some yarrow (how fortunate we picked some up before coming here, right?) and decide where to go. West and north-west will take us to the confusing mountains we've just left and north takes us to the edge of the world, but the other directions are unexplored as of yet.

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LOCATION: Confusing mountains
LIFE POINTS: 21 / 44+1
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 0
INVENTORY: EJ (hits on a 4, +5 damage), breastplate (-2 damage), healing potion (13 doses, restores a double dice roll of LIFE POINTS), small golden disc, scap of parchment, bunch of yarrow, bolt through neck instructions, right of passage token, Coded scroll, Sphere of Warning (glows green - no danger, amber - some danger, red - deathly danger, golden - Excalibur is near), Rations, rope (50 feet)
STATUS EFFECTS: Bolt through neck (automatically kills enemies who roll a 12 against us unless they have surprise), confused by the mountains (miss every other blow in the next two fights)
TREASURE: 1500 Gold Pieces

Roll of the Dead posted:

Death the first: encased in basalt.
Death the Second: encased in basalt. Again.

# ? Mar 20, 2016 11:30

SOLarian: Oct 29, 2012; Pillbug

north east, better to explore one edge first

# ? Mar 20, 2016 11:47

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Section 103 posted:

Distantly, in the wilderness, you see a curious rock formation, a towering basalt pillar some twenty feet high and so regular that it appears almost to be man-made.

Squatting cross-legged on top of this formation is a robed and hooded figure, so still he might be carved from stone, but definitely a living (if extremely ancient) man.

If you wish to approach this ancient, go to 27.

If not, due west will take you to 13, south will get you to 92, south west to 73, east to 19, south east to 48 and any northerly direction to 87.

We've already been to 13, 19, 73, and 87, so the only "new" directions are south to 92, south-east to 48 or approaching the man at 27.

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LOCATION: Confusing mountains
LIFE POINTS: 21 / 44+1
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 0
INVENTORY: EJ (hits on a 4, +5 damage), breastplate (-2 damage), healing potion (13 doses, restores a double dice roll of LIFE POINTS), small golden disc, scap of parchment, bunch of yarrow, bolt through neck instructions, right of passage token, Coded scroll, Sphere of Warning (glows green - no danger, amber - some danger, red - deathly danger, golden - Excalibur is near), Rations, rope (50 feet)
STATUS EFFECTS: Bolt through neck (automatically kills enemies who roll a 12 against us unless they have surprise), confused by the mountains (miss every other blow in the next two fights)
TREASURE: 1500 Gold Pieces

Roll of the Dead posted:

Death the first: encased in basalt.
Death the Second: encased in basalt. Again.

# ? Mar 21, 2016 22:08

inflatablefish: Oct 24, 2010

Approach the ancient one! He's old, he'll be a pushover, right?

# ? Mar 21, 2016 22:26

Comstar: Apr 20, 2007; Are you happy now?

See the old man on the pillar of wisdom.

# ? Mar 22, 2016 09:06

Russ L: Feb 26, 2011

Visit the elderly.

# ? Mar 22, 2016 11:27

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Section 27 posted:

'Excuse me,' you say, staring up while shielding your eyes against that violet-tinged sun, 'but what are you doing sitting on that pillar?'

The hooded ancient glances briefly in your direction and smiles. 'Waiting for you,' he says.

'For me?'

'Certainly. My meditations convinced me that one who sought the sword must venture here eventually. You do seek the sword, do you not?'

'Yes, but who are you?'

'The Sage of the Basalt Pillar,' he replies. 'It is my task and my pleasure to test your worthiness.'

'Hold on,' you say, in some alarm. 'I've already been tested - I fought the Ghastly Guardian Ghoul!'

'Which tests only your skill with a sword. I must test your skill with magic. Do you happen to have any with you?'

'Not a lot,' you reply quickly, unwilling to risk losing precious magic to some old idiot on top of a rock.

'I may be an old idiot on top of a rock, but I am skilled at reading minds,' remarked the Sage. He sighs. 'No matter. Take this - ' And he tosses you down a finely made little rosewood box with inlaid lid. 'A magical artifact and a gift from me to you.'

The magical artifact reminds you that you are carrying another. Surreptitiously, you glance at the silver sphere, which is, to your surprise, glowing blood red. How odd. Certainly this old idio... this Venerable Sage doesn't look all that dangerous. But the sphere is definitely red and a very threatening red at that.

To be on the safe side, you say politely, 'Thank you for your gift. Venerable Sage. I shall cherish it for the remainder of my life.'

'Which may not be all that long,' remarks the Sage drily, 'if you are unable to solve the mystery of the magic. Examine the lid of the box.'

You do so and discover that the inlay is in the form of numbers.

'Don't touch them,' warns the Sage quickly. 'The correct number, when touched, will open the box. To touch an incorrect number is death. But I will tell you that the correct number is my age. And my age is twice that of my youngest son. And my youngest son is ten years older than my eldest niece, who in turn is twice the age my third wife was when she died, which was 50 years ago. Coincidentally, my third's wife's first husband is today exactly the age my third wife would have been had she not died, which is 308 years. Now please examine the numbers on the box and try not to touch the wrong one.'

The numbers on the box are:

1000... 1042... 1052... 1032... 1123... 1160... 99

So which number will you touch to open the box!

If 1000 then go to 12.
If 1042 then goto 25.
If 1052 then go to 30.
If 1032 then go to 44.
If 1123 then go to 57.
If 1160 then go to 69.
If 99 then go to 84.

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LOCATION: Confusing mountains
LIFE POINTS: 21 / 44+1
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 0
INVENTORY: EJ (hits on a 4, +5 damage), breastplate (-2 damage), healing potion (13 doses, restores a double dice roll of LIFE POINTS), small golden disc, scap of parchment, bunch of yarrow, bolt through neck instructions, right of passage token, Coded scroll, Sphere of Warning (glows green - no danger, amber - some danger, red - deathly danger, golden - Excalibur is near), Rations, rope (50 feet)
STATUS EFFECTS: Bolt through neck (automatically kills enemies who roll a 12 against us unless they have surprise), confused by the mountains (miss every other blow in the next two fights)
TREASURE: 1500 Gold Pieces

Roll of the Dead posted:

Death the first: encased in basalt.
Death the Second: encased in basalt. Again.

# ? Mar 22, 2016 21:14

inflatablefish: Oct 24, 2010

That'll be 1052 then.

# ? Mar 22, 2016 21:49

Glazius: Jul 22, 2007; Hail all those who are able,
any mouse can,
any mouse will,
but the Guard prevail.; Clapping Larry

Let's break out the ol' septomin, shall we? 308 - 50 = 258 * 2 = 516 (niece) 516 + 10 = 526 (son) 526 * 2 = 1052 (elder) from which we conclude that Lord Scotland was arrested for loitering.

# ? Mar 23, 2016 03:48

Russ L: Feb 26, 2011

In the hope of breaking this somewhat lengthy suspenseful interlude, I will agree with the two black bars above.

# ? May 8, 2016 15:53

Ratatozsk: Mar 6, 2007; Had we turned left instead, we may have encountered something like this...

It would have been much more ironic if this had occurred on page 14.

# ? Sep 19, 2016 01:49

Bacon In A Wok: Jan 27, 2014

... fukkit, imma gonna :justpost:

Section 30 posted:

Cautiously you touch the number.

At once the lid springs open revealing inside a small, but beautifully cut ruby nestling on a velvet cushion. The gem glints in the sun.

'Wow!' you breathe.

'The jewel,' says the Sage, 'is extremely valuable, but you must never sell it, for it has substantial magical properties. Indeed, I can tell you now, it is quite vital to the completion of your quest.'

'How do I use it, Venerable Sage? you ask wildly, delighted to have a bit of magic booty come to you so easily.

'That I cannot tell you at this time, except to say this: the gem alone has no magic. Only when you find the ebony rod can you use it to its full effect'

With which the old fool closes his eyes and falls asleep!

'I may be a sleeping old fool, but I can still read minds,' he murmurs before beginning quietly to snore.

Not much more you can do here except creep away, which you should now do. Due west will take you to 13, south will get you to 92, east to 19, south east to 48, south west to 73, and any northerly direction to 87.

Only truly 'new' locations remain south to 92 or south-east to 48. The map, for reference (though our jumping off cliffs and other faerie-land shenanigans mean we probably don't really know where we are):

We can, of course, also risk Dreamtime or popping back to Merlin's House if we feel reckless enough.

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LOCATION: Confusing mountains
LIFE POINTS: 21 / 44+1
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 0
INVENTORY: EJ (hits on a 4, +5 damage), breastplate (-2 damage), healing potion (13 doses, restores a double dice roll of LIFE POINTS), small golden disc, scrap of parchment, bunch of yarrow, bolt through neck instructions, right of passage token, Coded scroll, Sphere of Warning (glows green - no danger, amber - some danger, red - deathly danger, golden - Excalibur is near), Rations, rope (50 feet), magicless magical ruby
STATUS EFFECTS: Bolt through neck (automatically kills enemies who roll a 12 against us unless they have surprise), confused by the mountains (miss every other blow in the next two fights)
TREASURE: 1500 Gold Pieces

Roll of the Dead posted:

Death the first: encased in basalt.
Death the Second: encased in basalt. Again.

# ? Sep 21, 2016 00:03

Comstar: Apr 20, 2007; Are you happy now?

South east to 48.

# ? Sep 21, 2016 10:44

Mikl: Nov 8, 2009; Vote shit sandwich or the shit sandwich gets it!

Thank you, Bacon. I'd been meaning to either come back to this thread or, more likely, officially close it, but since my last post between work, stuff at home and other things I kinda burned out and no longer had the mental energy to continue.

By all means, go ahead. You have my permission, and I'm glad to see this LP come back to life.

That said:

Comstar posted:

South east to 48.

# ? Sep 21, 2016 11:37

Old Man Mozz: Apr 24, 2005; I posted.

I'm also in the 48 camp

# ? Sep 21, 2016 13:13

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

48 best 8

# ? Sep 21, 2016 16:32

Bacon In A Wok: Jan 27, 2014

Section 30 posted:

The wilderness of rock and shrub has turned to sandy soil, then desert dunes encroaching in a broad swathe that may one day swallow up the wilderness itself.

'I suppose you do know where you're going? asks EJ.

'Of course I do,' you tell him confidently.

Which is probably just as well, since there are quite a few choices of direction here: North to 87. North west to 103. North east to 19. East to 11. South east to 58. South to 80. West to 13. South west to 32.

Hmm, since we started from 58 it means we probably know where we are now, sort of. Other locations already visited include 11, 19, 87, 13, and 103. Head south, southwest or backtrack to some previously-visited location?

Pip's Stat Block posted:

LOCATION: Edge of a desert
LIFE POINTS: 21 / 44+1
EXPERIENCE POINTS: 0
INVENTORY: EJ (hits on a 4, +5 damage), breastplate (-2 damage), healing potion (13 doses, restores a double dice roll of LIFE POINTS), small golden disc, scrap of parchment, bunch of yarrow, bolt through neck instructions, right of passage token, Coded scroll, Sphere of Warning (glows green - no danger, amber - some danger, red - deathly danger, golden - Excalibur is near), Rations, rope (50 feet), magicless magical ruby
STATUS EFFECTS: Bolt through neck (automatically kills enemies who roll a 12 against us unless they have surprise), confused by the mountains (miss every other blow in the next two fights)
TREASURE: 1500 Gold Pieces

Roll of the Dead posted:

Death the first: encased in basalt.
Death the Second: encased in basalt. Again.

# ? Sep 22, 2016 01:16

Ratatozsk: Mar 6, 2007; Had we turned left instead, we may have encountered something like this...

Southwest because gently caress south.

# ? Sep 22, 2016 02:27

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 3, 2024 14:26

Jazzimus Prime: May 16, 2002; The Brothers Autobot

Ratatozsk posted:

Southwest because gently caress south.

Sure, but drink two doses of healing potion first. We're at less than half HP Life Points.

# ? Sep 22, 2016 03:23

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Let's Play! > Let's Play the Grailquest series! (If this kills you, go to 14.)

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