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PleasingFungus posted:Alternately: “Ha, oh no-ah, you-ah misunderstand-ah,” you chuckle warmly. “I’m a friend-ah, here-ah to see you-ah.” Ferrie’s expression only darkens at your attempts to calm him with harmless chuckles. “How do you know my name, friend?!” he growls, his hand adjusting his wig, “and what are you laughing at?” He thinks you’re laughing at his wig! the keen detective inside you warns. Don’t look at it! You try to calm his nerves. “Oh-ah, I’m-ah thinking you must-ah be-ah a funny-ah guy, that’s all-ah. I have-ah important business to-ah discuss-ah with you-ah.” “I’m funny?” he replies, growing angrier, “Funny how? Like I’m a clown? I amuse you? I make you laugh? HOW THE FUDGE AM I FUNNY?!” Only he didn’t say “fudge.” He said the F-word! He’s furious! He pulls his .38 out lightning fast—and in seconds, he’s shoving it in your face! You’ll have to calm him down! “No no no!” you reply as calmly as you can, “You-ah got it all-ah wrong-ah! I’m-ah no laughing at you-ah. I’m-ah here to bring-ah you something-ah, a gift, so to speak-ah.” He stares deeply into your eyes, trying to read you. And as he does, the wet, furry guinea pig pelt on his head slides completely off the side and onto the carpet. It looks so utterly absurd, sitting there on the ground like a dead rat. Despite your best efforts, a tiny laugh escapes your lungs. And with that, Ferrie makes his decision. BANG! On the bright side, at least you died with a smile on your face.
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May 15, 2015 21:42
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This kid must have a loving massive bladder to pee as much as he did. how many choices are even left we haven't been down? Talking to Jenni?
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May 15, 2015 22:52
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We didn't try the wiretap the mob option I think.
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May 17, 2015 03:10
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It’s a bright spring morning, and you’re standing on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial on a picture-perfect summer day. You can hardly believe your eyes as you gaze out into the crowd—hundreds of thousands of your grateful countrymen, holding signs and waving flags. And they’ve all come to see YOU—the brilliant kid detective who risked all to solve the most impenetrable murder in history! You unravelled a conspiracy so complex, it tied rogue CIA agents with vengeful Mafia dons, angry Cuban exiles, duplicitous FBI agents, greedy munitions builders, Texas oilmen, disinfo specialists, and countless others! The Feds even had to build a new prison just to house them all. In a poignant irony, they called it the JFK Memorial Prison! The shocking revelations shook the country to its core, but today, Americans are celebrating. The crowd roars as President Robert F. Kennedy walks onto the dais. He grasps your hand, and whispers “Thank you, son,” before placing the Presidential Medal of Freedom around your neck. He steps to the microphone and clears his throat.  “My fellow Americans,” he says, in his Boston Irish accent, “today we are gathered to honor the bravery and dedication of this outstanding young man. Because of this boy’s extraordinary courage, we can now say that never again will murderers and traitors be allowed to escape justice with impunity. We can rest easy, knowing that the myriad evildoers who murdered my brother and attempted to destroy our democracy itself are now in prison, and will never again be free to unleash their terror on our nation!” The applause is deafening! You feel a hand on your shoulder. It’s Jackie Kennedy, and she’s crying. “Thank you,” she says. As you embrace her, you gaze out over her shoulder, to the crowd gathered before you. You see Americans of every race, every age, every income level, all cheering for you. In the distance, the sun shines on the Washington Monument. It’s a beautiful morning in the greatest country in the world, a nation with liberty and justice for all, such as it always was, and, thanks to the courage and honor of people like you, such as it always will be.
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May 23, 2015 00:54
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Job well done, everyone, some of the choices seemed dicey but it was all worth it in the end.
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May 23, 2015 00:57
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I can't wait for our hero to
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May 23, 2015 07:06
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So when do we get the plot twist where it turns out that we killed John F Kennedy all along?
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May 30, 2015 15:56
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It turns out the culprit was a mutant, Erik Magnus Lensherr aka Magneto!
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May 31, 2015 08:15
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