im learning how to summon demons

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TWIST FIST posted:

in the past the step people always got stuck on was drawing the summoning circle because it wasnt a perfect circle. obviously this wont be a problem with modern technology

they used a compass iirc

# ? May 20, 2015 13:18

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# ? May 7, 2024 00:08

Qwerinty: by zen death robot

The Anarchist's Cookbook, the Necronomicon on pdf, and hackers.usenet are related phenomenon and the causative factor for the slacker movement

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# ? May 20, 2015 13:19

bog pixie

TWIST FIST posted:

me: o mighty demon i have summoned you to ask you a question

demon: i will answer one question. now ask

me: is the s or the c silent in scent?

# ? May 20, 2015 13:37

3D Megadoodoo

TWIST FIST posted:

me: o mighty demon i have summoned you to ask you a question

demon: i will answer one question. now ask

me: is the s or the c silent in scent?

i can put this one to rest: the c, as sent was the original spelling. they just added the c to make it look cooler or something. (it comes from the same roots as sense)

# ? May 20, 2015 13:44

drilldo squirt: a beautiful, soft meat sack

I usually say it as sent.

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# ? May 20, 2015 13:45

3D Megadoodoo

drilldo squirt posted:

I usually say it as sent.

i say sk�nt

# ? May 20, 2015 13:46

Tebulot: im hip now bois

Additionally make sure you've set up a circle for yourself. Can't be too careful

# ? May 20, 2015 14:09

WetNightmare: by sebmojo

i'm always summoning them. when's a demon gonna summon me? :confused:

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# ? May 20, 2015 14:48

nonazis: The ants. They're everywhere, man. Big fuckers.

WetNightmare posted:

i'm always summoning them. when's a demon gonna summon me?

I got summoned the other day. the demon just wanted someone to go to pizza with. it was pretty cool. I got his hotmail address.

# ? May 20, 2015 15:16

Flynn Taggart

Uh oh it got loose you done goofed

# ? May 20, 2015 15:27

3D Megadoodoo

Flynn Taggart posted:

Uh oh it got loose you done goofed

JESUSCHRISTAAAH

Dem huge guts!

# ? May 20, 2015 15:55

Nosfereefer: IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM

okay, ive got this

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# ? May 20, 2015 15:58

Nosfereefer: IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM

im going to shoot at it

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# ? May 20, 2015 15:58

FartGhost

demon: why did you summon me?
me: i didnt really expect this to work
demon: so you just wasted my time
me: actually i have one thing, im part of this forum called byob and we really need more people posti
demon: *disintegrates as if hit by holy water*

# ? May 20, 2015 16:05

haunted bear tale

Hello? hello, I am a demon what are you doing?

It is very hard to be a demon on the internet. Someone tricked me into image-searching "magic circle".

they always trick me

# ? May 20, 2015 16:15

WetNightmare: by sebmojo

FartGhost posted:

demon: why did you summon me?
me: i didnt really expect this to work
demon: so you just wasted my time
me: actually i have one thing, im part of this forum called byob and we really need more people posti
demon: *disintegrates as if hit by holy water*

i thought this was the chill summon

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# ? May 20, 2015 16:22

cuntman.net

quote:

ASTAROTH. - The Twenty-ninth Spirit is
Astaroth. He is a Mighty, Strong Duke, and
appeareth in the Form of an hurtful Angel riding
on an Infernal Beast like a Dragon, and carrying in
his right hand a Viper. Thou must in no wise let
him approach too near unto thee, lest he do thee
damage by his Noisome Breath. Wherefore the
Magician must hold the Magical Ring near his
face, and that will defend him. He giveth true
answers of things Past, Present, and to Come, and
can discover all Secrets. He will declare wittingly
how the Spirits fell, if desired, and the reason of
his own fall. He can make men wonderfully
knowing in all Liberal Sciences. He ruleth 40
Legions of Spirits. His Seal is this, which wear
thou as a Lamen before thee, or else he will not
appear nor yet obey thee, etc.

demon teacher

# ? May 20, 2015 18:13

cuntman.net

demon: please turn your textbooks to page 666. now then molochs theorem states that

student: *raises hand*

demon: and if you multiply the number of damned souls by the temperature of the fire

student: excuse me sir i have a question

demon: which means the angles of a triangle actually add up to 181 degrees. some applications of this are

student: *waving both hands through the air*

demon: so really this all comes down to applied demon math. now as for

student: *sighs, puts on seal, then raises hand*

demon: oh did you have a question? i thought you were stretching

# ? May 20, 2015 18:14

Tebulot: im hip now bois

haha

# ? May 20, 2015 23:57

Mapparu

im going to summon so many demons that i will die
dont ask me how im going to do this. this plan is already in action.

# ? May 21, 2015 00:08

Al Borland: by XyloJW

Mapparu posted:

im going to summon so many demons that i will die
dont ask me how im going to do this. this plan is already in action.

Summon them inside you so they pop you open.

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# ? May 21, 2015 00:43

City of Glompton

TWIST FIST posted:

demon: please turn your textbooks to page 666. now then molochs theorem states that

student: *raises hand*

demon: and if you multiply the number of damned souls by the temperature of the fire

student: excuse me sir i have a question

demon: which means the angles of a triangle actually add up to 181 degrees. some applications of this are

student: *waving both hands through the air*

demon: so really this all comes down to applied demon math. now as for

student: *sighs, puts on seal, then raises hand*

demon: oh did you have a question? i thought you were stretching

# ? May 21, 2015 00:55

beer pal

TWIST FIST posted:

demon: please turn your textbooks to page 666. now then molochs theorem states that

student: *raises hand*

demon: and if you multiply the number of damned souls by the temperature of the fire

student: excuse me sir i have a question

demon: which means the angles of a triangle actually add up to 181 degrees. some applications of this are

student: *waving both hands through the air*

demon: so really this all comes down to applied demon math. now as for

student: *sighs, puts on seal, then raises hand*

demon: oh did you have a question? i thought you were stretching

lol

https://i.imgur.com/xQxnooW.png

# ? May 21, 2015 00:59

dumb crambo: Can't post for 3 years!

TWIST FIST posted:

demon: please turn your textbooks to page 666. now then molochs theorem states that

student: *raises hand*

demon: and if you multiply the number of damned souls by the temperature of the fire

student: excuse me sir i have a question

demon: which means the angles of a triangle actually add up to 181 degrees. some applications of this are

student: *waving both hands through the air*

demon: so really this all comes down to applied demon math. now as for

student: *sighs, puts on seal, then raises hand*

demon: oh did you have a question? i thought you were stretching

# ? May 21, 2015 01:25

Commie NedFlanders

my first skyrim run was a dark elf with thin arms but a razor ramon sharpness at the art of battle conjuring

☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭
Love God, Love Thy Neighbor
☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭

# ? May 21, 2015 01:51

Commie NedFlanders

TWIST FIST posted:

demon: please turn your textbooks to page 666. now then molochs theorem states that

student: *raises hand*

demon: and if you multiply the number of damned souls by the temperature of the fire

student: excuse me sir i have a question

demon: which means the angles of a triangle actually add up to 181 degrees. some applications of this are

student: *waving both hands through the air*

demon: so really this all comes down to applied demon math. now as for

student: *sighs, puts on seal, then raises hand*

demon: oh did you have a question? i thought you were stretching

this is blasphemically beautiful

☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭
Love God, Love Thy Neighbor
☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭

# ? May 21, 2015 01:53

GEExCEE

my guy is the best guy ever. he's the strongest magw in tge history of the skyrimverae, with the abolity to shoot fireballs and he can uae any aermor or wepons in the game. level 99 vampire/wererefwolf assasin with the master shout set on auto cast tha.nks tyo my grfx3500. ive beat the game many times, and have completed all the secret quests, discovrrered all thr bugs. im making a mod where you fucka devil

# ? May 21, 2015 02:00

Commie NedFlanders

pwn that satan

☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭
Love God, Love Thy Neighbor
☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭

# ? May 21, 2015 02:04

drilldo squirt: a beautiful, soft meat sack

GEExCEE posted:

my guy is the best guy ever. he's the strongest magw in tge history of the skyrimverae, with the abolity to shoot fireballs and he can uae any aermor or wepons in the game. level 99 vampire/wererefwolf assasin with the master shout set on auto cast tha.nks tyo my grfx3500. ive beat the game many times, and have completed all the secret quests, discovrrered all thr bugs. im making a mod where you fucka devil

Hope the devil has good boobs.

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# ? May 21, 2015 02:27

Commie NedFlanders

whoa not cool dude geez

☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭
Love God, Love Thy Neighbor
☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭☭

# ? May 21, 2015 02:29

DeepQantas: Ah, to be a Hero... Keeping such company...

The devil's boobs are perfect just the way they are

# ? May 21, 2015 07:05

cuntman.net

quote:

SHAN. - The Forty-fourth Spirit is Shax,
or Shaz (or Shass). He is a Great Marquis and
appeareth in the Form of a Stock-Dove, speaking
with a voice hoarse, but yet subtle. His Office is to
take away the Sight, Hearing, or Understanding of
any Man or Woman at the command of the
Exorcist; and to steal money out of the houses of
Kings, and to carry it again in 1,200 years. If
commanded he will fetch Horses at the request of
the Exorcist, or any other thing. But he must first
be commanded into a Triangle, Δ, or else he will
deceive him, and tell him many Lies. He can
discover all things that are Hidden, and not kept
by Wicked Spirits. He giveth good Familiars,
sometimes. He governeth 30 Legions of Spirits,
and his Seal is this, etc.

demon: you come to a split in a road. only one path leads you to the houses of kings which hold the money you want. you find two people there, one that only tells the truth and one that only tells lies. how do you get to your destination

me: Δ

demon: gently caress

# ? May 21, 2015 07:48