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Non-LPers are welcome, you said? Good. Name: DivineCoffeeBinge Gender: Female. I am secure enough to have a lady avatar! Besides, we need more Kawaii performers. Your Twitter: -- Appearance: Essentially "Emma in hipster glasses and a Starbucks and/or Dunkin' Donuts employee uniform" Type: High flying, high speed, high risk, low accuracy. Going for the Macho Man Elbow while her opponent is still standing, that sort of thing. Twitchy as hell. Finishing Move(s): The Espresso Shot (Shiranui finisher); Hold The Foam (Boston Crab submission finisher) Entrance Music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b1ktIMJ-Grk Hometown / Country: Shangri-La Announcer Name: D C B (alternately, "Immortal Caffeine Princess," which I find hilarious) Other gimmicks, quirks, personality traits and stuff: Face(ish), highly caffeinated at all times, twitchy as gently caress, voted Most Likely To Be Distracted By The TitanTron
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May 29, 2015 04:01
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Jobbo_Fett posted:Emma from NXT maybe? Yes, this - sorry about that.
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May 29, 2015 11:36
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Wait, how does a three-way First Blood Match work? Last one not bleeding wins? Does the first guy to bleed get kicked out and then it's a 1v1 match? Is the first person to inflict bleeding on an opponent the winner? What if it happens via a team-up? I am SO CONFUSED
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May 29, 2015 23:36
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Danaru posted:Seconded, Punchy vs Loki 1v1 to see who's the real Loki Noooo this cannot happen Loki and Punchy cannot fight one another because they are the same person. Loki is Punchy's Magical Girl Form.
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May 30, 2015 23:53
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IGgy IGsen posted:And here we have some more entrances. I realized that I didn't post the entrances of any of the women we had so far so they are in there as well. IGgy, you do good work.
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Jun 1, 2015 23:48
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Aw, man, I won't be able to be there for my wrestlechick's debut on account of how I'll be spending time with (urgh) in-laws this weekend. But from afar, I shall be thinking good thoughts! So as soon as I heard I was on the next card I got so excited I couldn't sleep and now I've been awake for thirty-seven hours straight and it's AWESOME I'm thinking so much more clearly than I ever have before but I have to admit I'm a little concerned that I'm fighting someone whose name is "Eeevil" because, I mean, they don't sound like they're very nice people, you know? But that's okay I've got a double-whip mocha with an espresso shot with my name on it that's gonna give me the energy to power through and defeat all comers and also I think maybe I might not sleep until Saturday but that's okay because I think I can *pause for breath* I think I can handle it, you know? Hey, can someone pass me the sugar?
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Jun 4, 2015 23:57
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See what happened is that Eeevil was holding my arms back and I was trying to reach for some coffee but there was no coffee there and I started nodding off and the ref thought that meant I was submitting it was a terrible terrible thing and now I want a rematch or maybe a match with someone else I really don't care look I'm so hopped up on caffeine right now I'll fight three people I don't even care oh hey did someone order a double-whip no-fat mocha 'cause if no one ordered it I'm drinking this thing right now (My moveset is perfect, IGgy, you made the Wrasslin' Barista of my dreams. Good job!)
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Jun 8, 2015 04:06
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Schir posted:If you'd just beaten Fruitsniffer, you'd probably be in a flaming tables match, but you didn't. Hugs were too powerful.
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Jun 11, 2015 23:56
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Junpei Hyde posted:Look he just gave me a hug in celebration of losing the buscus and I wanted to give him a nice friendly pat on the back! That means I lose apparently? I demand a word with the referee! I feel your pain. You know what makes me feel better? Coffee. We should all have some coffee. Okay for me it would be 'have some more coffee' but that's not what's important here.
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Jun 12, 2015 00:39
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Schir posted:Plot 3: IGgy stares at Aurora's boobs and insists that he isn't. Also he's interviewing Aurora. The chat votes to have Aurora fight Divine Coffee Binge in the Pay Per View for the Kawaii Title. Awww, you guys! That is totally amazing of you all, thank you, chat! I think this calls for a celebration. And to celebrate, I brought coffee. Lots and lots of coffee. Some of it is even for people that aren't me! Hey, did you guys know that if you take caffeine pills and crush them up into powder and mix them in your coffee you can hardly taste it at all? Or anything else, really! Seriously I haven't even slept since Eeevil defeated me and it doesn't bother me at all! Like, I don't even like to look at a bed right now, that's how awake I am! Here! Have some! You'll like it it's awesome HAVE SOME COFFEE
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Jun 14, 2015 07:43
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Junpei Hyde posted:^_^: BECAUSE YOU SEE NUFF NUFFKINS, YOU MAY LOAD THE SPACESHIP WITH THE ROCKET FUEL, BUT YOUR FUEL SIMPLY CANNOT BURN HOT ENOUGH TO MELT THE STEEL BEAMS OF MY INDOMITABLE SPIRIT! It's funny; I can't tell if that's meant to be anime or a Macho Man Randy Savage promo.
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Jun 21, 2015 00:17
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You'd think submissions should be turned off if you lost your only two appearances via them!  Money In The Bank, as fun as the idea is, would be an absolute horror to try and implement the way LPFWA is set up. Let's not make that mistake.
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Jun 26, 2015 12:41
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Zanzibar Ham posted:Are all those entrances based on real ones? I'm asking especially about the last tag-team entrance. Pretty sure they're all built from parts from actual WWE ring entrances; the DivineCoffeeBinge CAW's entrance is essentially The Ultimate Warrior's run-up to the ring followed by (I think) Lita's pose on the turnbuckles. Action Shakespeare's freakish monstrosity has Randy Orton's entrance (e: as does Dr. Rath, interestingly enough!). E2: I don't recall who Kalon & Heavenator's entrance is based on (also, how are the zombie and angel team not called The Afterlife?), but I know I've seen it. DivineCoffeeBinge fucked around with this message at 20:33 on Jun 28, 2015 |
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Jun 28, 2015 20:25
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FinalGamer posted:Chickenhead's entrance is way too loving perfect for that dance he has on Pretty sure that's just straight up Ravishing Rick Ride's entrance. It is beautiful.
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Jun 28, 2015 21:49
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IGgy's connection tapped out faster than me!
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Jul 4, 2015 23:26
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I would like to preemptively apologize to everyone who watches the replay on YouTube for the incessant stream of nonsense I typed out, but I was the only one in the chat for most of the event so you all get to suffer.
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Jul 5, 2015 20:34
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Also, while it hardly counts as plot, there was a lengthy digression about IGgy looking under QC's kilt.
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Jul 5, 2015 21:21
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Eeevil posted:I liked that match much better than my first one. I'm also pleasantly surprised I managed to pull off the five moves of doom already. Does the AI try to go for that sequence on purpose or was it just a coincidence it lined up like that? I'm betting the 'John Cena' AI is more meticulously programmed than any other AI in the game, so it was likely deliberate.
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Jul 7, 2015 05:41
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I am undefeated by anyone who hasn't been a champion! That's really kind of neat! Also I think I could use some coffee!
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Jul 12, 2015 09:06
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No women's matches? Boooo! #GiveKawaiiAChance
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Jul 17, 2015 00:27
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anilEhilated posted:
Welp, time to search the Kawaii Division dressing rooms for hidden cameras again...
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Jul 17, 2015 23:40
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I'm watching you. Always. Watching. You. You know who you are. Soon, I will too.
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Oh, so now you're shaming people for diverse body types? Sexist pig! Go back to r/MRA!
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Jul 18, 2015 08:43
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Boooo sausagefest card booooooooooo (I kid!)
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Jul 23, 2015 23:56
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What's all this talk about the food being gone I don't see what the big deal is since I have been subsisting entirely on coffee and the occasional muffin - thanks rara! - for most of the past year but apparently people are really worked up about this sort of thing so I've decided to use my Divine Barista Powers which I totally have even though I've never mentioned them before because what's the point of being named DivineCoffeeBinge if you can't have Caffeine Deity Powers anyways I'm using them to give everyone a nice hot fresh cup of coffee! Cream and sugar optional of course although why you wouldn't dump in sugar so you could be buzzed on both sugar and caffeine at the same time is a mystery to me I haven't slept in four months. It's House Blend. Sorry, I'm not handing out the Kona until I get a match. ...or a muffin.
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Jul 29, 2015 08:35
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Simsmagic posted:
You know what goes great with garbage can dinner? Coffee! Here, have some!Flamander posted:
You know what goes great with the flames of justice? Coffee! Here, have some!
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Jul 29, 2015 22:17
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: NO PROBLEM! I CAN SUSTAIN MYSELF THROUGH THE FLAMES OF JUSTICE! Comrades, I can help with the food issues as well. The Title of Justice Ranger comes with it's perks, after all! Downside, unfortunately, is that the food I can get will take a while to procure, because it's gonna take like, 10 days, for the order to be processed. Past that, though, it should be clear sailing.
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Lazyfire posted:
Hey I see your car has cupholders so I brought you cups of coffee to put in the cupholders and also drink because seriously I want to see what Lazyfire is like all jacked-up on caffeine I think that would be awesome and also terrifying and also hilarious all at the same time
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Jul 29, 2015 23:07
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Hattie Masters posted:
I think if the food is all gone we have to wrestle and whoever wrestles better their food is obviously superior because we can't taste any of the food to prove otherwise and also I should wrestle because coffee is the superior drink to all other drinks.
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Jul 30, 2015 03:28
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Guys!. Guys. We have forgotten the important point. Yes, the food is all gone, but that food was for the Pay-Per-View. If it's all gone... Can we still Wrestle?
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Jobbo_Fett posted:
GODLY. CAFFEINE. POWERS. Doubt the majesty of the DivineCoffeeBinge at your peril, mortal! I curse thee with the inability to ever process caffeine again! Never again will you be able to concentrate at that nine o' clock meeting with management! Never again will you find the energy to stay up all night playing Warcraft and eating Cheetos or whatever the hell it is you do! Seriously though guys I haven't slept in forever I might just be hallucinating the Godly Coffee Powers thing but the moon dinosaurs assure me it's all cool
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Jul 30, 2015 07:37
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So when is someone gonna tell Divine that the culprit made off with the coffee beans as well? Ever since the theft the "coffee" has been a bit off. I looked into it, got some tests done at the lab and it seems she's just been using chocolate Astronaut ice cream and warm water...
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N-no... no caffeine? But... B-but... *looks at self* Oh hey wait a second my other job is working in a coffee shop so I'm gonna go do that for a bit 'kay bye!
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Jul 30, 2015 18:48
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Hattie Masters posted:
It's okay I got a medical exemption in my contract, because keeping me from caffeine for more than twenty-four hours is a fire hazard. Because I will light things on fire if I start getting caffeine withdrawal headaches have you ever had one of those they are terrible so I solved the problem by never not having caffeine in my system. See? It's right there on my contract, where I scrawled 'IGgy I will murder you if you don't sign this I will murder you in the face' and then he signed it. Also he was drunk at the time, so he might not remember but it's right there in black and white well really burnt sienna and white because of the crayon and all but anyways I'm gonna go get more coffee I'll bring back some for everyone it'll give us all the fuel we need to hunt down the food thief because coffee is magical like that. Coffee! Hey, can you believe I said all of that in one breath? Neat! I'm a little dizzy now though so I better go.
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Jul 31, 2015 01:18
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So... so tired...
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Aug 2, 2015 00:10
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IGgy IGsen posted:#5 Wasn't she dead a week ago? *Yawn* Wh-what time is it? Wha' day is it? How long was I... oh God it was terrible please don't let me sleep again! What? Match? Oh man! I hardly have enough time to get properly caffeinated!
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Aug 6, 2015 23:03
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Professional wrestling is so anime that it warps the axis of anime/not-anime around into a circle and wraps around to being not-anime. It's anime to a level that even anime fails to achieve.
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Aug 8, 2015 12:20
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anilEhilated posted:They're halting her caffeine circulation. Purely intentional. I need to get an EpiPen loaded with caffeine for when that happens. 
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Sep 1, 2015 09:43
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I love the idea of Blue Force Ghost Lazyfire so much that if it happens I'm willing to valet for him even though it makes no rational storyline sense. I'm just saying.
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Sep 6, 2015 16:15
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Lazyfire posted:Good news, though. Since I died I met this guy who calls himself Odin and he runs this place called Valhalla where all you do is fight people with sharp objects. It's pretty drat fun being dead sometimes! Dear LPFWA Writing Staff: plz bring back Lazyfire as a Blue Force Ghost With A Fur Cape And A Viking Helmet ty
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Sep 8, 2015 03:25
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Whoo I'm in a match! IGgy's streak of putting my LadyWrassler(tm) in matches on days I'm probably not going to be able to show up continues, but that's what YouTube is for!  (I'll have lots of coffee to celebrate regardless)
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Sep 11, 2015 18:17
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anilEhilated posted:Buscus? Buscus?! How the mighty have fallen! Really? Was someone around here mighty, then?I kid I kid it's a work don't hate me
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Sep 11, 2015 19:04
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Eeevil posted:This week's Kawaii match looks to be DivineCoffeeBinge's second losing streak vs losing streak match. Better luck this time DCB. As long as no one steals the coffee again I'm sure everything will work out great! I've only been awake for two straight weeks this time, too! So surely that will make a difference!
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Sep 11, 2015 19:48
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Junpei Hyde posted:That's a good point, we don't know this week's challenger for the John Cena Wrestlemania 9 Invitational. Nuffkins. Only Nuffamania can stop the Cenation.
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Sep 11, 2015 19:59
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