|
My situation last year had some similarities to this (although no kids, thank god.) just lawyer up and divorce this maniac. Sorry this happened but your life will be so much better without her.
|
#
¿
Jun 10, 2015 12:06
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ May 2, 2024 14:34 |
|
|
Also, get counselling.
|
|
#
¿
Jun 10, 2015 12:07
|
|
|
Sorry this happened but it's going exactly as predicted as it always does, unfortunately. Remember therapy isn't just for low self esteem. You're gonna be dealing with a lot of feelings in the next year or so. Talking to some will be key. And yeah use the adultery to get this over as quickly as possible. States are all different but I was able to bypass the year long legal separation because of adultery. The kids will complicate things immensely but get a good lawyer and take the initiative. You will NOT want this dragging on. The waiting and not knowing what will happen is the worst part. But she sucks and you need to be done with her.
|
|
#
¿
Jun 13, 2015 08:48
|
|
|
Also document/screen cap everything.
|
|
#
¿
Jun 13, 2015 08:49
|
|
|
r00tn00b posted:Everything is documented. Conversations recorded (with her knowledge). I'm not super dumb in just naive. I hear ya. Boy do I.
|
|
#
¿
Jun 13, 2015 08:55
|
|
|
Drunk Nerds posted:OP, keep in mind, you can get a lawyer AND hold out hope that you can work things out. Don't hold out too much hope though. Could you ever trust her again?
|
|
#
¿
Jun 13, 2015 17:06
|
|
|
3. Get divorced
|
|
#
¿
Jun 14, 2015 16:16
|
|
|
Bill Pullman posted:3. Get divorced That's unfair, everyone's situation is different I guess. But holding out hope that something might change in 10 years is a great way to live an unfulfilling life. She doesn't have your interests at heart at all. The sooner you put your happiness (including saving your relationship with your kids) the better.
|
|
#
¿
Jun 14, 2015 17:15
|
|
|
Sorry dude, that sounds awful. Hang in there, stay strong and get through this.
|
|
#
¿
Jun 14, 2015 22:49
|
|
|
r00tn00b posted:Thank you. I had the same thing happen. It's like a phantom limb. It fades, don't worry.
|
|
#
¿
Jun 15, 2015 06:56
|
|
|
r00tn00b posted:Fidelity isn't illegal. I would only think the judge's person opinion on that would matter Dude it's a civil trial, not criminal. You're fighting for leverage over money and kids. Painting this as her fault is key so you can have the upper hand. There's poo poo at stake.
|
|
#
¿
Jun 15, 2015 17:16
|
|
|
Good deal. Make sure to follow up. This helped me a lot early on.
|
|
#
¿
Jun 15, 2015 20:36
|
|
|
I got conflicting advice at this point. "Whatever you do don't look at her social media accounts!" Vs "Screen cap everything!" Unfortunately I think documenting everything wins out but boy is that a soul killer. Sorry dude.
|
|
#
¿
Jun 19, 2015 20:34
|
|
|
Nwabudike Morgan posted:drat look at this stone cold motherfucker I'm the guy who essentially kicked his wife out the second I got her to admit to cheating and never wavered from the divorce path and even I moped around hoping for "closure" before I finally realised life doesn't work that way. OP, you already know this but it's not creepy. However, take it from those who've been there, there's a good chance you won't ever get any satisfactory answers. (And what would those be anyway) The key is to look forward and eventually you'll care less and less about the past.
|
|
#
¿
Jul 2, 2015 18:03
|
|
|
It's because she's a selfish piece of poo poo hth
|
|
#
¿
Jul 3, 2015 10:26
|
|
|
Good for you buddy. You've got your eyes open and are heading in the right direction.
|
|
#
¿
Jul 4, 2015 06:24
|
|
|
I'll add this as well: the way he's talking about what he misses/wants from his wife has changed very dramatically over the course of the thread in a very natural and understandable way. I'd say dude is coping with a traumatic change in his life very well and by constantly rehashing this topic you're probably causing more confusion than anything. He's dealing. Leave him be.
|
|
#
¿
Jul 7, 2015 22:31
|
|
|
From all outward appearances you're handling a very tough situation like a badass. Just keep doing what you're doing. Good luck with the hearing.
|
|
#
¿
Aug 17, 2015 13:43
|
|
|
r00tn00b posted:I was just taking a shower and thinking about everything, and for a while I questioned everything that is happening as some sort of plot against me and it dawned on me that she has taken my ability to trust other people from me, here these people are looking out for the best interested of my kids, and I am second guessing their actions like they are setting me up for prison. I have always been able to trust people and for better or worse I liked that about me and now I see shadows everywhere. On top of everything shes done to my kids and me. I start the battle for custody in a few hours starting with a call to the courthouse to schedule a hearing. My best hope is that she is out of state and misses the court date and also misses her lawyer payment and has no one there to represent her. I hope that happens. Did I miss an update after the hearing? What's the latest?
|
|
#
¿
Aug 20, 2015 10:26
|
|
|
Yeah it's hell on earth.
|
|
#
¿
Oct 14, 2015 13:33
|
|
|
Fantastic news, best of luck!
|
|
#
¿
Nov 7, 2015 09:52
|
|
|
r00tn00b posted:I thought i was gonna get away clean i should have known better. I thought the same thing. We had a jointly agreed plan to be clean etc and she ended up nuking that and causing massive delays and legal expenses. Once again every story sounds the same. Sorry dude, stay strong. We've been there and it does end. You got this.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 13, 2016 17:40
|
|
|
Noctone posted:Also it amazes me that after all these years there are still a lot of goons that don't seem to comprehend that there are legitimately lovely, batshit insane people in the world that will do inexplicably awful things like the OP's wife did (and continues to do). Maybe it's one of those things you have to experience first hand to really come to grips with? I mean, "there are two sides to every story" etc... but once you've tried to reason with a truly irrational person you never forget the experience.
|
|
#
¿
Feb 26, 2016 18:34
|
|
|
Great news man! Big weight off your shoulders, eh? You've probably already started to move on but now you really can get rolling for real. Good stuff.
|
|
#
¿
May 15, 2016 12:51
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ May 2, 2024 14:34 |
|
|
Wow what a resolution. I wouldn't be surprised if you never hear from her again.
|
|
#
¿
May 20, 2016 07:16
|
|