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Eifert Posting
Apr 1, 2007

Most of the time he catches it every time.
Grimey Drawer

Zurreco posted:

16-0 is more probable, but neither is going to happen.

What are the odds that Russel Wilson walks away from the Seahawks at the end of the season?

Zero, although that doesn't seem like a this or that question

OBJ Lives up to hype and is a top two receiver or falls to the pack and is outside the top eight?

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Chichevache
Feb 17, 2010

One of the funniest posters in GIP.

Just not intentionally.

Eifert Posting posted:

Zero, although that doesn't seem like a this or that question

OBJ Lives up to hype and is a top two receiver or falls to the pack and is outside the top eight?

He will get more attention this year so I wouldn't be surprised if his per game stats drop a bit. His gross numbers should still be higher than last season, but they might not be top 10.

He's still at least a top 15 talent though.

Will the rookie with the most receptions be a WR or TE?

Hot Diggity!
Apr 3, 2010

SKELITON_BRINGING_U_ON.GIF

Chichevache posted:

He will get more attention this year so I wouldn't be surprised if his per game stats drop a bit. His gross numbers should still be higher than last season, but they might not be top 10.

He's still at least a top 15 talent though.

Will the rookie with the most receptions be a WR or TE?

WR and probably by quite a bit because great first year TEs seem to be pretty rare

Will the Jets or the Bills be more successful this season?

Zurreco
Dec 27, 2004

Cutty approves.

TubeStank posted:

Will the Jets or the Bills be more successful this season?

This was already asked, and I think most would agree that the Jets will barely edge them out.

Who will start more games this year, Jameis Winston or Geno Smith?

A COMPUTER GUY
Aug 23, 2007

I can't spare this man - he fights.

Zurreco posted:

This was already asked, and I think most would agree that the Jets will barely edge them out.

Who will start more games this year, Jameis Winston or Geno Smith?

Winston, because Smith and Fitzpatrick are both gonna get hurt or benched this season and we'll get the Bryce Petty show.

NFC South: Will the Falcons or Panthers have a more successful season?

nrr
Jan 2, 2007

A COMPUTER GUY posted:

Winston, because Smith and Fitzpatrick are both gonna get hurt or benched this season and we'll get the Bryce Petty show.

NFC South: Will the Falcons or Panthers have a more successful season?

Obviously the Panthers now that they have a 100 million dollar quarterback

Who has the better season, LeSean McCoy or DeMarco Murray?

MrLogan
Feb 4, 2004

Ask me about Derek Carr's stolen MVP awards, those dastardly refs, and, oh yeah, having the absolute worst fucking gimmick in The Football Funhouse.

nrr posted:

Obviously the Panthers now that they have a 100 million dollar quarterback

Who has the better season, LeSean McCoy or DeMarco Murray?

DeMarco Murray. He's not started behind somebody like McCoy and Fred Jackson.

Amari Cooper over/under 80 receptions this year?

fartknocker
Oct 28, 2012


Damn it, this always happens. I think I'm gonna score, and then I never score. It's not fair.



Wedge Regret

MrLogan posted:

DeMarco Murray. He's not started behind somebody like McCoy and Fred Jackson.

Amari Cooper over/under 80 receptions this year?

Under, but probably not by much. Only nine rookies (Six WRs, two backs, and a TE) have ever done that, including guys like Eddie Royal, but not Randy Moss for example, so he could still have a very good year even without that volume of catches...

Sam Bradford: Over/Under 7.5 starts this season?

Febreeze
Oct 24, 2011

I want to care, butt I dont

fartknocker posted:

Under, but probably not by much. Only nine rookies (Six WRs, two backs, and a TE) have ever done that, including guys like Eddie Royal, but not Randy Moss for example, so he could still have a very good year even without that volume of catches...

Sam Bradford: Over/Under 7.5 starts this season?

I'm going to go against the joke and say over. I think he stays healthy most of the year and we get tons of articles on how he's fixed and Chip Kelly is a genius then a bad hit takes him out week 11 and the Eagles have to use Tebow and everything falls apart

We have/do not have a worst to first team this year

Chichevache
Feb 17, 2010

One of the funniest posters in GIP.

Just not intentionally.

Febreeze posted:

I'm going to go against the joke and say over. I think he stays healthy most of the year and we get tons of articles on how he's fixed and Chip Kelly is a genius then a bad hit takes him out week 11 and the Eagles have to use Tebow and everything falls apart

We have/do not have a worst to first team this year

Have. Jameis and the Bucs will swarm to an imposing 8-8 record, taking over a poo poo division with poo poo teams vulnerable NFC South.

Will all of the 3 Future HoF QBs (Brees, Brady, Manning) complete the season?

Elephanthead
Sep 11, 2008


Toilet Rascal

Chichevache posted:


Will all of the 3 Future HoF QBs (Brees, Brady, Manning) complete the season?

As in start 16 games? No, one is suspended, one is super old, and one will have the division locked up with 7 wins.

Mike Vick or or Johnny Manziel, more wins this season?

Eifert Posting
Apr 1, 2007

Most of the time he catches it every time.
Grimey Drawer
Manziel. Because one is more than zero.


More likely: MVP isn't a QB or a new team gets a Lombardi?

Nystral
Feb 6, 2002

Every man likes a pretty girl with him at a skeleton dance.
New team hoists the Lombardi. QBs are too visible and shirt of All Day Purple Jesus running wild, they'll have it sewn up.

Who has more wins at the end of the season? Eagles with Bradford or Patriots without Brady for four games.

BlindSite
Feb 8, 2009

Nystral posted:

New team hoists the Lombardi. QBs are too visible and shirt of All Day Purple Jesus running wild, they'll have it sewn up.

Who has more wins at the end of the season? Eagles with Bradford or Patriots without Brady for four games.

Patriots without Brady by one game

Who gets the first "QB of the future article" Jameis or Maritotta?

Probably Magic
Oct 9, 2012

Looking cute, feeling cute.

BlindSite posted:

Patriots without Brady by one game

Who gets the first "QB of the future article" Jameis or Maritotta?

Jameis, because no one gives a poo poo about anyone on the Titans.

Except me and Metapod. :(

Do the Cardinals make it into the playoffs or no?

Metapod
Mar 18, 2012
Yes because they are really good

Who gets a new contract first Dez Bryant or Justin Houston?

MrLogan
Feb 4, 2004

Ask me about Derek Carr's stolen MVP awards, those dastardly refs, and, oh yeah, having the absolute worst fucking gimmick in The Football Funhouse.

Metapod posted:

Yes because they are really good

Who gets a new contract first Dez Bryant or Justin Houston?

Justin Houston. I think Dez will play out this year on the tag while Houston gets a contract by the deadline. Dallas doesn't have the cap space next year to make things happen.

More receiving yards this year: Devante Parker or Kevin White?

Zurreco
Dec 27, 2004

Cutty approves.

MrLogan posted:

More receiving yards this year: Devante Parker or Kevin White?

Kevin White is gonna ownzone.

Which Bay area team gives up more penalty yards, Niners or Raiders?

Raku
Nov 7, 2012

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.

Roll Tide

Zurreco posted:

Kevin White is gonna ownzone.

Which Bay area team gives up more penalty yards, Niners or Raiders?

Raiders as the refs try in vain to save Peyton's life

Bigger Bust Potential: Kevin White or Shane Ray?

Pron on VHS
Nov 14, 2005

Blood Clots
Sweat Dries
Bones Heal
Suck it Up and Keep Wrestling
Would you rather get free pizza for life from any restaurant or have a son who has legit super powers

Probably Magic
Oct 9, 2012

Looking cute, feeling cute.

Pron on VHS posted:

Would you rather get free pizza for life from any restaurant or have a son who has legit super powers

I'm lactose intolerant and I'd still pick the pizza.

Grittybeard
Mar 29, 2010

Bad, very bad!

Raku posted:

Bigger Bust Potential: Kevin White or Shane Ray?

Ray just because it's questionable how much more weight he can carry I guess, although he's talented as hell.

And a son who's super powers include but are not limited to creating awesome pizza out of thin air.

Will the 2015 top ten draft pick QBs (Winston/Mariota) combine for better careers than the top ten from 2011 (Newton/Locker/Gabbert)?

Shadow225
Jan 2, 2007




Grittybeard posted:

Ray just because it's questionable how much more weight he can carry I guess, although he's talented as hell.

And a son who's super powers include but are not limited to creating awesome pizza out of thin air.

Will the 2015 top ten draft pick QBs (Winston/Mariota) combine for better careers than the top ten from 2011 (Newton/Locker/Gabbert)?

No. Newton is solid, but Mariota is walking into a train wreck, and I don't have faith that Winston is actually good.

Would you rather have Donald Trump or Art Modell own your team?

CyberPingu
Sep 15, 2013


If you're not striving to improve, you'll end up going backwards.

Shadow225 posted:

No. Newton is solid, but Mariota is walking into a train wreck, and I don't have faith that Winston is actually good.

Would you rather have Donald Trump or Art Modell own your team?

Trump, if anything else watching his hair flop back and forwards in anger or elation would provide entertainment.
also Trump seems like the type of person to fire someone mid game for the giggles.


Who is more likely to break an all time record Andrew Luck or Adrian Peterson?

CyberPingu fucked around with this message at 10:48 on Jun 24, 2015

nrr
Jan 2, 2007

Uhh, I'd like to say luck, football-wise, but this is a pretty fuckin open ended question and I think Adrian Peterson has already whipped more kids in the nuts than most of the free world and could probably break many more records. Like how many puppies can you kick at one birthday party? Or in a minute, how many bunnies could you slam dunk into a woodchipper?

Also, I'm too drunk to ask a question right now so just pretend that I did and that it was smart and witty and didn't have you solemnly shaking your head in disapproval. Ok good talk.

Chilichimp
Oct 24, 2006

TIE Adv xWampa

It wamp, and it stomp

Grimey Drawer

nrr posted:

how many bunnies could you slam dunk into a woodchipper?

loving lol

Which franchise finishes the season with a winning record, the Browns, the Titans, or the Buccs.

Diqnol
May 10, 2010

Chilichimp posted:

loving lol

Which franchise finishes the season with a winning record, the Browns, the Titans, or the Buccs.

The Buccs, they have a pretty strong offense now that they have a QB and two potentially decent lineman out of the draft. If Doug Martin comes back to form too, we're possibly looking at a 9-7 team despite their woes on defense. Titans are too far behind right now, give them a year or two to put it together. Browns have the best shot on paper probably but Cleveland thrives on pain and they still lack a QB so nothing doing there.

Who makes it back to the superbowl this year: Pats or Seahawks?

MrLogan
Feb 4, 2004

Ask me about Derek Carr's stolen MVP awards, those dastardly refs, and, oh yeah, having the absolute worst fucking gimmick in The Football Funhouse.

GUISSEPPE PIZZAPIE posted:

The Buccs, they have a pretty strong offense now that they have a QB and two potentially decent lineman out of the draft. If Doug Martin comes back to form too, we're possibly looking at a 9-7 team despite their woes on defense. Titans are too far behind right now, give them a year or two to put it together. Browns have the best shot on paper probably but Cleveland thrives on pain and they still lack a QB so nothing doing there.

Who makes it back to the superbowl this year: Pats or Seahawks?

Neither.

Over/under: Peyton Manning throws 40 TDs.

CyberPingu
Sep 15, 2013


If you're not striving to improve, you'll end up going backwards.

MrLogan posted:

Neither.

Over/under: Peyton Manning throws 40 TDs.

Under by a country loving mile.

Ravens D 2000 or LOB?

Eifert Posting
Apr 1, 2007

Most of the time he catches it every time.
Grimey Drawer
Lob, Ravens d is all name.


Which division winner from 2014 finishes last this year?

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!

Eifert Posting posted:

Lob, Ravens d is all name.


Which division winner from 2014 finishes last this year?

Eh.. in the AFC maybe the Broncos if Peyton finally turns to dust mid season. In the NFC I guess the Cowboys if Romo is injured again. I wanna say Panthers because christ they were barely a division winner last season and they have a lot of uncertainties on that roster, but the rest of that division could be total dogshit again.

Which tight end is more likely to disappoint their new team: Jimmy Graham or Julius Thomas?

Impossibly Perfect Sphere fucked around with this message at 19:47 on Jun 24, 2015

Ehud
Sep 19, 2003

football.

NC-17 posted:

Eh.. in the AFC maybe the Broncos if Peyton finally turns to dust mid season. In the NFC I guess the Cowboys if Romo is injured again. I wanna say Panthers because christ they were barely a division winner last season and they have a lot of uncertainties on that roster, but the rest of that division could be total dogshit again.

Which tight end is more likely to disappoint their new team: Jimmy Graham or Julius Thomas?

Julius Thomas because the Jags' QB situation is poop and bad.

Will this be Jeff Fisher's final year coaching the Rams?

Zurreco
Dec 27, 2004

Cutty approves.

Ehud posted:

Julius Thomas because the Jags' QB situation is poop and bad.

Will this be Jeff Fisher's final year coaching the Rams?

OR (no)

Which team is going to go for 2 the most with the new rules, the Eagles (because Kelly loves chaos) or the Seahawks (because Carroll will never not run it in at that range again)?

BlindSite
Feb 8, 2009

Zurreco posted:

OR (no)

Which team is going to go for 2 the most with the new rules, the Eagles (because Kelly loves chaos) or the Seahawks (because Carroll will never not run it in at that range again)?

Kelly, because 2 points can't melt steel beams Carroll's going to turn into a giant conservative puss after throwing away his superbowl.

Who has more touchdowns this year Funchess or Benjamin

Amy Pole Her
Jun 17, 2002
Benjamin because he's an actual nfl caliber receiver.

Who is more likely to regress to the mean - Odell beckham jr or the Cowboys offensive line?

Eifert Posting
Apr 1, 2007

Most of the time he catches it every time.
Grimey Drawer
OBJ because it's one great player vs 5 or 6.


More likely: Tom keeps his 4 gamer or it gets dropped to one or less.

Grittybeard
Mar 29, 2010

Bad, very bad!

Eifert Posting posted:

More likely: Tom keeps his 4 gamer or it gets dropped to one or less.

I'll go with Brady getting at least two games.

More rushing yards, the guy Chip Kelly wanted (Frank Gore) or the guy he got (DeMarco Murray)? So...who gets hurt first I guess?

Febreeze
Oct 24, 2011

I want to care, butt I dont

Grittybeard posted:

I'll go with Brady getting at least two games.

More rushing yards, the guy Chip Kelly wanted (Frank Gore) or the guy he got (DeMarco Murray)? So...who gets hurt first I guess?

Murray. Even if he gets hurt he's a better runner at this point and has a better line and system around him. Gore has a bad line and is on a team that is going to throw the ball 90% of the time.

Which old fart QB has the better season: Brees or Peyton

axeil
Feb 14, 2006

Grittybeard posted:

I'll go with Brady getting at least two games.

More rushing yards, the guy Chip Kelly wanted (Frank Gore) or the guy he got (DeMarco Murray)? So...who gets hurt first I guess?

DeMarco Murray.

Does Chip Kelly trade a player during the season this year? If so, who?

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Zurreco
Dec 27, 2004

Cutty approves.
You guys are bad at this.

axeil posted:

DeMarco Murray.

Does Chip Kelly trade a player during the season this year? If so, who?

Yes, he will dump Bradford.

Febreeze posted:

Murray. Even if he gets hurt he's a better runner at this point and has a better line and system around him. Gore has a bad line and is on a team that is going to throw the ball 90% of the time.

Which old fart QB has the better season: Brees or Peyton

Brees considering the Broncos are apparently trying to phase out Manning.

Who is going to get injured and miss half of the season, Clowney or AP?

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