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Battlefield Earth was mentioned earlier but it was one of the first large sci-fi books that I read. It was sort of interesting but went on way too long. One of the scientific things that took me out of the book in a huge way was how they treated radioactivity. Apparently, the evil alien race came from a planet with super unstable air that exploded in contact with radiation. I guess their sun doesn't put out too much. So the super smart human protagonist sends a nuclear bomb to their bomb and blows it up. This is where an author with restraint or editors would've ended the book but nope, an already long book needed some boring rear end scenes of humans getting established on the galactic political scene. Terry Goodkind's poo poo was already mentioned as well but I wanted to reiterate so that people don't actually read it. I had the Sword of Truth series recommended to me by several people and one friend lent them to me so I worked my way through a bunch. I had to stop at the libertarian masturbatory fantasy though. Rand started carrying stones on his back eventually saving up enough money to get a cart then hire other people and start his own stoneworking empire all through the magic of hard work. Also he sculpted two statues so beautiful that people fell down and wept upon seeing them and they were so well made that the bad guys had trouble destroying them even with a sledgehammer or some poo poo. The parody page is awesome and mentions that Kahlan almost gets raped a bunch of times but in one book, she thinks she got raped but it was actually her husband and it was dark and he had a spell on him so he couldn't let her know. I think he tried to do his regular sexing maneuvers to let her know she wasn't actually being raped but nope. Speaking of rape, how about the Wild Card series? For those unfamiliar, it's an anthology series edited by George R. R. Martin with stories by a bunch of his writer buddies. The premise is basically X-Men but it was caused by a virus and is super hardcore and gritty with most "mutant" equivalents getting no powers and just horrific physiology. Also everything is terrible because that's how writers let you know this poo poo is serious, real and gritty. Most of the authors are pretty bad and to make things worse, many of the characters are literally the author's character from some tabletop RPG. Roger Zelazny was the only one who consistently delivered good stories and characters while the other authors just tried to make things as shocking and horrible as possible. This culminated in a book whose name I forget that had some rear end in a top hat switching his grandfather's brain into a young woman and then raping her repeatedly until she/he got pregnant. He also got the power to switch minds from having anal sex with a lawyer. There's a woman that can cure the virus' effects with sex. A guy transforms into some evil Godzilla-sized monster and his giant erection is described in detail, I think it was the size of a bus and spiky? No word on how much it glistened, if at all. I wouldn't really recommend reading much of it although some of the later books tone down the poo poo and explore more interesting stuff but fortunately our very own Thinky Whale has a thread where he goes through the books and reads them for you! You can find it here: http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3501532
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Jul 13, 2015 06:32
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Thursday Next posted:Here's another lovely book: Pillars of the God drat Earth, by Ken Something or Other. This book also sucks. I made it about halfway. When the author has literal sentences stating how a character feels, you know you're grading remedial English essays all over again: "She was very pretty, but she was mean. This made him feel angry." I actually finished this because I love historical fiction and it doesn't do a terrible job in that regard. Some inaccuracies but all the architecture stuff was really well done and researched and lovingly described, in stark contrast to the lovely descriptions of actual characters. Maybe you didn't get far enough but there's also a loving ton of gratuitous sex and rape scenes. I don't know how many times a guy has to rape someone for the reader to realize he's bad but Ken Follet clearly went above and beyond the call of duty to establish this. Somehow this book spawned several boardgames, a miniseries and an upcoming video game. Presumably none of them feature much rape. Thursday Next posted:Edit: I also read the Black Jewels Trilogy by Anne Bishop. It's been a while, and I didn't finish them, but I remember a pleasure slave with a magical cock-ring that his masters could use to deliver pain if he didn't do what they wanted him to do. They're just thinly-veiled porn and not worth anyone's time. I don't have much to add about the ridiculousness of this series but I was given this book by one of my sister's friends who thought I'd like it. That got me a serious wtf once I got into the book that was compounded by the fact that the friend read this book at age 12 or something. And I know she finished it because my sister said she had the sequels too. The main thing I remember is some dude given the aphrodisiac drug and loving a zombie or something.
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Aug 27, 2016 09:19
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Yeah, I enjoyed Heroes Die but then there's mystical magic poo poo in the real world too! And something is the personification of evil! It's a really interesting concept though with the parallel universes or whatever they are, especially when a god gets pulled through to regular old Earth and has to live as a normal dude. Joe Abercrombie's stuff scratches that same itch but much better.
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Aug 28, 2016 05:45
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I also respect my lady love too much to approach her with my feelings. She should be free like a butterfly.
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Aug 29, 2016 23:48
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Glazier posted:Wasn’t that based on a real incident in Russia? For people that haven't read it, the pilot lets his son take control of the plane and he fucks up and kills a few people. I'm pretty sure I do remember something like that happening in real life too.
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Oct 15, 2017 21:13
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