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 "And when i looked back, there was only one set of giant rear end prints in the sand. Because I was sitting on his face..."
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Aug 3, 2015 21:58
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"More like Polly want a room full of crackers. Seriously- not a single black person here?"
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Aug 3, 2015 22:06
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 "I'm afraid I cannot grant your transfer request. Sea-block is already full"
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Aug 3, 2015 22:10
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 "This would be a lot easier if I had paid the drat electric bill on time"
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Aug 3, 2015 22:14
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 "I know it's not what you had in mind when you said you wanted to 'play doctor,' Marsha, but pretend doctor or not, your BMI still makes you fall into the 'obese' category.
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Aug 3, 2015 22:20
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 "I'm sorry, ma'am. I've checked your entire suitcase with no luck. You must have left your neck at home."
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Aug 13, 2015 02:45
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 "What can I say? Those ISIS propaganda videos are very convincing. Enjoy your anthrax, you infidel."
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Aug 13, 2015 02:51
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 "Let me just put this out there now- I'm really into pegging, so if that doesn't work for you then we're both wasting our time here."
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Aug 13, 2015 02:57
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 "Have you ever heard of something called 'preping the bull'?"
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Aug 13, 2015 03:00
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 "I know they're all cows, but since they did all technically come from India, somehow people from the south still know to say racist poo poo to them."
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Aug 13, 2015 03:02
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 "Look- I'm the goddamn Burger King. If I tell you to put chicken nuggets on top of a whopper, you put the drat order in without question, ok?"
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Aug 13, 2015 03:08
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 "gently caress it, I'm outta here. You dumb fucks couldn't even convict OJ, so what chance do you even have of finding me once I go home and wash this makeup off?"
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Aug 13, 2015 03:13
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 "I've heard of star power, but this is ridiculous"
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Aug 15, 2015 02:33
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 "I can't believe we all paid for this movie when it's clear that none of us even have eyeballs"
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Aug 15, 2015 02:36
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 "This is not what I thought you meant by 'lets hop in the pool so i can show you my monster'"
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Aug 15, 2015 02:46
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 "Meanwhile, on the set of 'The 911 Year Itch'..."
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Aug 15, 2015 02:49
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 "Yeah, so it turns out that was actually a typo. It should have read 'No Forks.' "
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Aug 15, 2015 02:54
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 "Hang on a second- I'm trying to use my gigantic loving ears to eavesdrop on those people in the other room"
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Aug 15, 2015 02:56
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 "For the last time- you can't get AIDS from being milked"
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Aug 15, 2015 03:02
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 "It was at that moment that the senator realized exactly why it had been so easy for him to book Drake to perform at his rally"
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Aug 15, 2015 03:09
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 "I know they warned me not to rub a magic lamp that I got from Aquaman, but it seemed like a simple enough wish- 'I want to work in a school.' "
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Aug 15, 2015 03:49
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 "So it says here there's something called a 'sandwich.' It lets you eat peanut butter without licking it off of someone's crotch... Were either of you aware of this?"
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Aug 15, 2015 04:07
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Bored posted:If I didn't have to register, maybe I would consider it. I don't know if this is allowed or not, but I made a generic account to submit captions: email address: SACaptions@gmail.com Display Name: sacaptions PW: NewYorker Unfortunately it only lets you submit one caption per picture, and it won't let you log in without filling in a caption. Mods- if this isn't allowed for some reason then please feel free to delete this. Thanks.
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Aug 15, 2015 04:39
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 "You weren't kidding when you said you planned to sit around the couch all weekend"
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Aug 19, 2015 21:59
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 "Why, yes, I'm a huge fan of Elton John. How did you know?"
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Aug 21, 2015 00:55
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 ]There are no maps or anything here, but you think there are becauase you're crazy in the head. Like that book about the king that gets a new wardrobeİ
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Aug 24, 2015 23:52
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 "I brought a Toblerone for lunch"
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Aug 24, 2015 23:54
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"But what's to be done when the Gorton's fisherman can't trust himself?"
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Aug 24, 2015 23:59
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 "I'm afraid I can't make any sense of your new clause"
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Aug 25, 2015 00:01
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| # ¿ May 17, 2024 18:38 |
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Worldshatter posted:
Bitch, the add said "burger queen," not "size queen," so stop comlaining.
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Aug 25, 2015 00:03
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