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Funky See Funky Do posted:Try picturing everyone in their underwear. that isn't helping, in fact it's making it worse. |
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Aug 18, 2015 15:38
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| # ¿ May 10, 2024 11:45 |
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*grizzled, jaded detective arrives on scene* Det: Alright what do we got? Cop: Sir, white male, mid twenties, fingerprints show him to be Jacob Marley, an entry software engineer at the big firm down the street. Det. Hmm, cause of death? Cop: Coroner is saying "asphyxiation" *detective motions the EMT in the meat wagon for some gloves, puts them on, pulls tweezers out of bag in coat pocket* Cop: What are you thinking? *detective opens victim's mouth, sticks tweezers down their throat and slowly, yet effortfully, pulls a pair of tighty whities from victim's trachea* Cop: No, could it be? Det: Yes, this looks like the work of Ayatolla Hermione |
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Aug 18, 2015 15:55
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Funky See Funky Do posted:I like the idea of being a reverse serial killer. Where I stalk prostitutes and give them their lives back through secret acts of kindness. Yeah baby they call me the walking scholarship |
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Aug 18, 2015 16:08
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Mr. sandman, bring me the cream. Make them the cutest that he'll ever see Give me two lips, like roses and clover Then tell him that his lonesome nights are over. Sandman, I'm so alone Don't have nobody to call my own Please turn on your magic beam Mr. Sandman, bring me the cream. |
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Aug 18, 2015 16:15
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