What about the male rape victims?

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > What about the male rape victims?

Control Volume: Dec 31, 2008

OwlFancier posted:

The fault lies with the person committing the assault, but

Interesting viewpoint.

e: Would you say that that rape wasn't legitimate?

# ¿ Sep 2, 2015 22:28

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 15, 2024 20:40

Control Volume: Dec 31, 2008

Muscles! Sobriety! Assertiveness! Shouts! Modesty!

*flash of bright light* "With your powers combined, I am Captain Rape Prevention!"

*cut to a scene of a woman coming on to a drunken man* Help me Captain Rape Prevention, this broad is all over me and I can't give proper consent! *byooo, zot, Captain Rape Prevention is on the scene* "While the entire fault of this encounter lies with the perpetrator, being drunk is a personal choice and is easily remedied, so in the future you can take this knowledge and

# ¿ Sep 2, 2015 22:38

Control Volume: Dec 31, 2008

So do you like walk into dialysis clinics and start telling people about how cutting down sugar can prevent diabetes

Like what the gently caress is saying, and I quote, "a primary factor appears to be "being drunk impaired my judgement" which is a fairly specific loss of agency which is very easily remedied, and not an inherent part of one's existence" supposed to accomplish beyond telling him YOU HAVE THE POWER, TO HEAL FROM THE RAPE _{and also you wouldnt have been raped if you werent drunk}

# ¿ Sep 3, 2015 03:52

Control Volume: Dec 31, 2008

OwlFancier posted:

Also "don't get drunk around people you don't trust" is good advice for anyone? Difficult to say tactfully but yes I absolutely would ask people I care about to be careful around people I don't trust. Because I'd like them not to get raped or mugged or something.

It's incredibly insensitive advice to give someone after they've just shared a story about being raped, and saying that it's the "primary factor" is one rewording away from being victim blaming, but keep doling out your sagely advice while arguing against the imaginary horde that's apparently saying he should be deeply traumatized.

# ¿ Sep 3, 2015 04:16

Control Volume: Dec 31, 2008

Yes, you're saying, in essence, "She did a bad thing but you could have done something about it."

She is blamed for the bad thing, but, since he has the agency on whether or not to do one of the contributing factors he could have prevented the situation by not doing that contributing factor.

She's to blame for the rape, but he could have not gotten drunk.

Sure, she raped him, but if he wasn't drunk, this whole situation wouldn't have happened.

Do you not loving see how this poo poo works or what

# ¿ Sep 3, 2015 04:33

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 15, 2024 20:40

Control Volume: Dec 31, 2008

OwlFancier posted:

I understand how easy it is to conflate the two. But I also understand that being told you are not capable of controlling your own life is really loving annoying.

I have experience with assault, not sexual, thankfully, but violence yes.

It is not my fault what happened to me, but nowadays I can prevent it happening again. I like that, that more than anything makes life a lot better than it was when I was young. I perhaps should not have to do that, but I can, and it works well. I think it's something worthy of a little pride.

I have a very clear memory of what it's like to be made to feel utterly powerless and there is little in the world more unpleasant than that, or more apt to cause fear. I haven't really been afraid of anything since then, because I always feel capable of having some agency in the matter, and that is always better. It does apply retroactively, if I'd been smarter when I was young I might have been able to have a better time of things, but that is entirely secondary to my ability to do something now.

I would sooner take the effort to not focus on self-blaming than to try to make myself believe that there is nothing I could possibly have done, because I absolutely could if I'd known what I know now. It isn't productive to self-flagellate over that however, so I don't.

So maybe I'm partisan, but I'm always going to favor a sense of agency over the alternative, even if it's difficult to separate from blame. There is a difference, a very clear one once you understand it, whether it's easy to see or not, and I know of nothing more horrifying than a loss of agency.

Have you considered a concealed carry permit? With just a little bit of training, you can prevent assault from happening again! Just a tip from me to you, stay frosty!

# ¿ Sep 3, 2015 04:53

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > What about the male rape victims?