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H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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that lady looks exactly like she had a stroke at some point

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H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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Accretionist posted:

I wonder what the carbon footprint of average citizens in the 1800s was like? Where would sustainability be if society looked more like that but with public transit and really great internet and dentistry? Right now, for everyone to live like contemporary Americans, we'd need 5x Earth's resources or something like that. Got to do things differently if a billion Indians are to come up out of squalor

*burns coal in fireplace*

*pays street urchins to light thousands of street gaslamps*

*has house servant dump chamberpot into open sewer on the street*

*has factory dump toxic industrial waste into rivers, sky, with complete legal impunity*

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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Runaktla posted:

I don't know, never read a Grisham novel. Most lawyers don't do more law stuff outside of the office for shits and giggles (unless it indirectly relates to their work life for marketing purposes). All the "Hey you should watch ... [xyz show about lawyers]" can go gently caress off.

But, I don't know, tell me what weird stuff happens in Grisham novels and I'll tell you if it sounds realistic. I'm hearing another attorney in another office as I'm typing this telling a potential client "Well that's nice, that internet must be a pretty smart lawyer it must be right and I must be bad at what I do... go give it a shot. Bye." There's a lot of reasons to be cynical in law.

I'm a probate lawyer which means (at least in CA) I deal with cases dealing with the probate courts involving taking care of someone else's poo poo cause they're dead (probate), made a trust and put all/some of their poo poo in it then died/got dementia/was too feeble to handle their poo poo (trust admin), are elderly with dementia (conservatorship), or a minor (guardianship), where somebody may or may not be appointed to handle that poo poo.

My day usually consists of going to hearings for menial poo poo with some occasional argument by (usually) sleazy and/or overly emotional family members, cracking the whip on CPAs/clients/other third parties to get them to get me poo poo to make the court happy so it doesn't assrape my client assuming he/she mishandled that someone-else's assets, trying to put lipstick on a pig getting my client out of being assraped by a judge when they were negligent with assets, analyzing trusts/wills/pleadings to see what we should ask from the court, preparing docs to ask certain things from the court, settlement negotiations when someone contests what we do, talking clients off the ledge cause they're flipping out at nothing in particular, giving clients news that their situation sucks, telling clients nicely that the courts are underfunded and that's why their emergency order to save a few hundred thousand in assets is being delayed for two weeks (yay CA Courts though its getting better), and dealing with dumbass attorneys that don't know the law/replace it with being unnecessarily hostile. Stuff like that.

Why I typed all this crap up in a GBS thread about millenials is beyond me I just like bitching.


lawyers.txt


While I'm an excellent lawyer and the degree has taken me to some amazing places, the simple fact of the matter is that I hate doing what lawyers do. I don't enjoy the work. The nature of the profession is parasitic. It doesn't involve making anything, or really contributing anything. I hate having to work with lawyers, they are generally either repugnant, insane, insectoid creatures who gleefully immerse themselves in bureaucratic rules and minutia, or they are lying, aggressive, delusional sociopaths. I hate hearing lawyers talk about their work. When I see them talk excitedly with each other over the trivial minutiae of some motion in a case, I want to gouge my eyes out. I hate doing legal research, and I hate researching legal principles, because they are all arbitrary. I hate putting together deals for corporations, because the work is largely derivative, boiler plate copying of documents from other corporations, mixed in with an insane pessimism and unquenchable paranoia about missing details or pitfalls. The paranoia is unquenchable because there is no way to sit down and establish anything with absolute certainty - the nature of the profession is one of uncertainty and insecurity, based upon nothing but arbitrary and changing rulings, regulations, and so forth. The profession is going downhill - any fool can see that. There will be no job security for any positions other than the most entrenched, indisposable, soulless masters of obscure regulatory schemes cocooned inside ossified, dying bureaucratic nightmares reminiscent of the Byzantine empire. The job market for lawyers will get worse and worse - I'm well set with a successful career, yes, but I am looking 5-10 years down the road, when poo poo really starts to get bad in this country, and the law is not the place to be.

You can do three things as a lawyer. Seriously, the profession boils down to three things. You can fight with people. You can become an expert in something complicated and arbitrary (yet essential) that very few people care about. You can be a professional pessimist, researching and obsessing over pitfalls and traps. Those three basic tasks circumscribe the ENTIRE legal profession, for the most part, with very few exceptions.

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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hackbunny posted:

(Ermenegildo, Genoveffa, Giuseppina, Asdrubale), or even worse ultra-Christian names. women get the worst of the latter, with such cheerful names as Addolorata ("sorrowful"), Incoronata ("crowned"), Crocifissa ("crucified"), Crocetta ("little cross"), Immacolata ("immaculate"), Annunziata ("announced", as in Annunciation), Assunta ("raptured"). men typically are named for saints (which usually have normal names), but sometimes parents slipped in Maria ("Mary") as a second name.

do you live in mexico

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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Gorilla Salad posted:

Do people honestly say "Cally ope"?

there's a calliope street in new orleans that's pronounced exactly like that

i used to live a block off of milan street that was pronounced MILE-ann

new orleans is fun like that

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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FogHelmut posted:

Hunter, Gunner, Tanner, Foster, Ryder,

and loving Jacksons everywhere




The next wave is all Cameron, Kayden, Brayden, Hayden, Tristan, Aiden, Mason, and Logan. gently caress you Wolverine.





and a friend of mine from hs has named two of her children after a video game and an 80s movie:

aeris seraphina (two first names)

bastian




we laughed our asses off when she announced over fb each time

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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Tarkus posted:

To be fair, the same goes for girls who are too tall. I knew this chick who was a solid 8 or 9 but she regularly got told 'no way' by guys because she was like 6'5"

that's b/c their vaginas are enormous

which is p cool if you're into that

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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notZaar posted:

My favorite crazy old candy is candy corn.

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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guaranteed backstage all-access pass

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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Stinky_Pete posted:

Software Architect

lmao

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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Omi-Polari posted:

I don't know if any of you noticed but babies are born all the time, so it must mean that putting artificial borders around generations is a bunch of bogus hoo-hah.

What's just as bogus is ascribing personalities to entire groups like they're bugs. This generation is courageous/selfish/disillusioned/entitled. It is actually annoying. I am annoyed by this whack pop-science.

generational labels are primarily for marketing purposes

hth

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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babies havin rabies posted:

I like how I have to justify never having a tattoo or piercing to some people.

just get some metal rammed thru your deyock what's wrong with you

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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Gibberish posted:

all from the same twitter

















AND FOR THE GRAND FINALE






she needs to show her pierced nipples on her twitter more

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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symbolic posted:

no facecams, no clinging on to the game of the week, no bullshit

i remember watching chuggaaconroy's Super Mario Sunshine Let's Play back in 2009/10 and thinking it was the greatest thing ever

yeah past me was pretty dumb too

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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look at this smug piece of entitled millennial poo poo

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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OctoberBlues posted:

I had freshman orientation in August 2005 and one of the things everyone was super excited about was getting that .edu address so we could get on facebook.

My favorite part of that old facebook was that writing on someone's wall just pulled up a text document thing with all of the past poo poo people had written completely editable. Like anything could go wrong with that.

the best was when you could punch in your classes for that semester and then stalk people you had class with

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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MarcusSA posted:

I'm the rear end in a top hat that needs bleaching.

we know

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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symbolic posted:

i have no idea

Vine stars are all stupid anyways

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TzpAYv0AP68

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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thathonkey posted:

pretty sure this person is not famous i made it through about 10 seconds of the video though so that's somethin good for him i guess

he's a writer for late night and is nailing a current snl castmember


anyway you should skip ahead to him just screaming at people in the street and pointing guns at cops

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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mdm posted:

the only thing anyone knows or cares about gen x is they are where latchkey kids started

reminder that gen x is the most rightwing demographic by a shitload

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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i like renting b/c i don't hafta pay to replace the fridge or water heater or the drywall when i drunkenly kick a hole into it

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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it's tough being a conservative brony

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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Count Freebasie posted:

I also bet his wife pegs him.

i like where your head's at

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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except that hobos know that the shelters won't let you in w/ an animal

so squatter hobos


and in new orleans the ones who have a well-off family and/or trust fund are called fauxbeaus

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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a happy snowman posted:

No, hobos work.

Those are bums.

or gutter trash

esp when they have extensive facial tattoos

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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The Taint Reaper posted:

I bought a pair of new balance sneakers today because they're the only brand of sneakers that has not been ruined by millenials.

make sure to wear them w/ jeans and a black turtleneck

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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these millennials just need a war to toughen them up

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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Man Whore posted:

My favorite part about that catchphrase was that it was stolen from Austin Texas.

p sure they changed it to Keep Austin White

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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notZaar posted:

"Boohoo I can't afford to live in the city, but I'm far too superior to those redneck scum to live within my means."

yeah what kinda loser wants to live near jobs

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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KiddieGrinder posted:

I also love that the Army is near the bottom. I can just imagine every millennial in that survey thinking "that's grunt work for morons, let those idiots who don't have a degree in liberal arts do that poo poo" :smug:

joining the military is for suckers

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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Houle posted:

I find this really strange, like, I get it is all about a perception and accountability thing but getting drunk on the weekend is really just something young people have been doing since alcohol have gotten cheaper. So long as they are not photographing themselves doing something illegal it shouldn't really bar someone from entry job all it does is encourage people to make fake social media accounts for professional settings. Like, the only reason why this is a thing now is that it's a new technology now. People have been documenting their wacky activities and sexual exploits since the printed word.

And this is from someone who doesn't do any of that poo poo, who holds a job where if I had done it I would be sacked pretty quickly, and drink in moderation.

sorry but if a cursory search shows hundreds of pictures of you getting bombed in public and you have visible tattoos then old white people are not going to call you back for a job

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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my adult palate can't handle the sweetness of fruit loops so i've moved on to golden grahams

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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Mandator posted:

what years are millennials? 83-95?

1980 to 2000

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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the earliest known millennial is freakazoid who derived his powers from the nacient internet

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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Furia posted:

I like making documentaries.

The effects of gentrification in zones with largely immigrant habitants in developed nations? gently caress no. I want to make a documentary about me

Me me meeeeeeeeeeeeee

most documentary film majors go into reality television production nowadays since it's booming and the skills are exactly the same

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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Wendigee posted:

Still lollin at the 10k a month chick saving so little...

yeah that chick who's worked in boston nyc and miami and pulls in $10k a month before she's 30 had better watch her budget or else she might get hosed over

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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TheWhiteNightmare posted:

What kind of fancy feast buying mother fucker spends over $100 a month on a cat

groceries from whole foods are just healthier

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H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
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Zzulu posted:

I am a professional and I use emojis

owned, rofl

i make sure to use them in all of my passwords

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