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les fleurs du mall posted:th quintessential A Misanthrope post a good vintage, locally sourced cum from 2012
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Sep 8, 2015 18:36
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i would maek babby if it gave weed when crying
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Sep 8, 2015 18:38
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 Amateur Internet bodybuilders around the world are raving about the revolutionary new steroid alternative called "Photoshop"!  #5: It is actually not necessary to cover an entire page with question marks at the end of every question. A single question mark will usually suffice.  It's called "Slam Whale."  Sometimes people on the street will hold consumer goods such as smartphones up in the air for whatever reason. That's your chance to snatch it and run.
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Sep 8, 2015 18:44
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les fleurs du mall posted:th quintessential A Misanthrope post Libelous Slander posted:a good vintage, locally sourced cum from 2012  these goons made some cool posts -- you won't believe what happened next
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Sep 8, 2015 18:49
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A misanthrope posted:
quote:*beep boop* vote accepted *bzzt* Voted 1.
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Sep 8, 2015 18:50
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 I never would have targeted his grandma for demonic possession if I'd known he had easy access to holy water   It is very drafty in that house.  Just looking at this loving bullshit has basically killed my appetite for the rest of the day. Imagine if you ate it. You'd puke up everything you touched for like a week.
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Sep 8, 2015 18:53
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 World governments have decided you must go to this island and swim with pigs RIGHT NOW. Resistance will be met with force.
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Sep 8, 2015 18:54
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 unarmed black man discovers cure for world hunger and is immediately shot 257 times by Texas police.
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Sep 8, 2015 18:58
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cram me sideways posted:i would maek babby if it gave weed when crying I was about to say the same thing a bit earlier, I just wanna know what type of weed does this baby cry? If it's just mids, no thanks.
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Sep 8, 2015 19:01
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 Ask the bear to do a cool "roary pose" so you can take a picture of it to post to the Internet. Bears love social media and will usually agree to hold off on mauling or eating you until you have finished posting the picture and "tagging" the bear in it, during which time you can make your escape. Under no circumstances should you agree to a "selfie" with the bear.
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Sep 8, 2015 19:22
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 The buffalo rapes the man. At first I wanted to turn it off, but found myself strangely aroused by the scene. By the end of the video, I wanted to try it myself! I bet I could handle it, not like the bitch in the video who died.  We're feeding the Chinese our excess spinach. In return they send us tainted corn.
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Sep 8, 2015 19:31
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 And tiny, spotted homunculi living in your stomach that crawl out of your bellybutton.  Stage 1: swollen feet stage 2: lesions on the neck and shoulders  #1: a wealthy white woman who dresses her daughter in a kind of silly outfit Honorable mention: a bipolar alcoholic who regularly beats her toddler and locks him in the basement for days on end without food or water.  She got so drunk she passed out and someone took a picture of her panties! I think it's safe to say this is the worst thing that has ever happened to a drunk girl on spring break. Her life is like, totally over!  This horrible crab woman has legs for arms and arms for legs so she walks around like Sebulba from Star Wars, Episode I: the Phantom Menace. Own the extended edition on DVD and Blu Ray today!
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Sep 8, 2015 19:44
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 1. do not resist his advances. sex with a burglar is an exotic and coveted practice. 2. for the love of god DO NOT try to convince him otherwise. chances are he deserves your belongings more than you do. please don't burglar shame  1. pushups: virtually a white trash bench press. 2. situps: you might as well be making GBS threads yourself 3. running: lmao
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Sep 8, 2015 19:47
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 There are women out there who will have sex with you for money, so there's really no reason for you ever to go without sex. You can get one with a pretty face for cheap if she has boobs that flop down to her bellybutton.
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Sep 8, 2015 19:50
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I'm getting pretty triggered by the whole capitalize every word format.
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Sep 8, 2015 20:01
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 All from one convenient Chinese website!  You will need cosmetic surgery after you gently caress up your face with this corrosive goop. Even surgeons jaded by years of accident reconstruction will be horrified.  Throw your makeup in the garbage can, ladies; you won't want it anymore once you discover the magic of fried eggs. Put hot fried eggs on your face.  Bigamy can increase your household income by as much as 50% per additional spouse.  Ours is Mitt Romney, even though he's not a candidate.  Wheatgrass juice enemas three meals a day.
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Sep 8, 2015 20:03
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 a complex and gruesome string of murders has plagued the entourage of once oiled heroes, launching a thorough but ultimately fruitless investigation
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Sep 8, 2015 20:05
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 This dog with the hosed up face really has its poo poo straight.  Once you turn 45 CARROTS WILL KILL YOU.  You could lose your house.  "I'm coming for the other 30%" threatens gun-wilding stockbroker.
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Sep 8, 2015 20:12
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I think p much all the GIS results with any promise have been done by now. A surprising number of them were parodies already. (awesome thread btw)
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Sep 8, 2015 20:13
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 Seeing this toddler drinking from a baby bottle really makes you realize how you're too old to still drink from one.
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Sep 8, 2015 20:17
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momerath posted:
 Andre the Giant.
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Sep 8, 2015 20:19
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 Scientists are baffled by this mysterious alchemical phenomenon! What are the limits of this magical credit card's power? How does it define "textbook?" If a textbook is printed on lead, and a law is passed that decrees pizza can only be paid for in gold, will the credit card's powers magically adjust to transmute lead into the precious metal? If so, have we found a source of infinite, free energy (and gold)? Only one thing is certain: he who possesses the card holds the reigns of the world in his hands. Already covetous nations plot against us. We must destroy them before they destroy us!
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Sep 8, 2015 20:25
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 ...eaten. that's right folks, we ate the most beautiful and endangered horses we could find (we could only find 10) and now you have to live with that knowledge. your click has directly enabled horse torture and eating, good going idiot.
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Sep 8, 2015 20:30
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Applewhite posted:
It's a reverse mortgage, so if your house doesn't keep up repayments you get repossessed by the bank. Crashbee fucked around with this message at 20:33 on Sep 8, 2015 |
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Sep 8, 2015 20:30
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 Long after the actual stars have grown cold, and all other matter has ceased to exist, these celebrities will still live, ageless and eternal, adrift in the primordial blackness. Long have they sought death, and tried by their own hand to end their interminable lives, but, like an ephemeral dream, death still eludes them. Even the small comfort of insanity is denied to them as they float endlessly through space in a living hell beyond imagining.
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Sep 8, 2015 20:40
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For real though, what does "reverse mortgage" mean, do you like give the bank a bunch of money and let them live in your house until they pay it back or what
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Sep 8, 2015 20:41
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loquacius posted:For real though, what does "reverse mortgage" mean, do you like give the bank a bunch of money and let them live in your house until they pay it back or what Yeah it sounds like a scam.
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Sep 8, 2015 20:44
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loquacius posted:For real though, what does "reverse mortgage" mean, do you like give the bank a bunch of money and let them live in your house until they pay it back or what It's not a scam per se, though the specific terms may or may not be favorable depending on the actual value of the house.
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Sep 8, 2015 20:46
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 Patrick Dempsey lives in a literal holodeck in the middle of the woods. Be careful though because sometimes the safety protocols malfunction and all occupants are asphyxiated.
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Sep 8, 2015 20:49
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 That used to be a shag carpet, but not anymore! Now it's smooth as marble, all thanks to Ultra Shave!
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Sep 8, 2015 20:52
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 Because he loved to get money.
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Sep 8, 2015 20:54
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 Get this: clothes... for sharks. Applewhite fucked around with this message at 21:00 on Sep 8, 2015 |
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Sep 8, 2015 20:57
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 Just because a cabin is empty doesn't mean it's not still private property. Now he's facing a hefty trespassing fine!
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Sep 8, 2015 21:00
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Applewhite posted:
at first I didn't know if I should be looking at the girl, what's she's holding, or the giant red circle, but thankfully the arrows helped
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Sep 8, 2015 21:01
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 the bubbly pop starlet reveals her controversial "1000 Years Of Tay" , an elaborate manifesto detailing her vehement desire for 1000 years of violent totalitarian rule over the human race; in her radical vision, subjects would be forced to don overalls bearing the face and name of their eternal judge, jury, and executioner
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Sep 8, 2015 21:10
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momerath posted:
my new fav.
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Sep 8, 2015 21:15
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The OP is funny and good but I had a hard time reading it because Ive trained myself to not look at clickbait and it takes some effort to overcome that reflex.
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Sep 8, 2015 21:23
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 A certain German Fuhrer jumps up to the #2 spot!  And all in one convenient omelet!
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Sep 8, 2015 21:29
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 Because you're haunted by nightmarish flashbacks to the beaches of the pacific theater?
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Sep 8, 2015 21:32
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| # ? Apr 28, 2024 14:38 |
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 "I'm on seventeen different medications. It gets so hard to keep track sometimes. Thank god for the app on my phone."  Real magic has returned to the world. The barriers between fiction and reality have begun tor crumble. This time we were fortunate that it was a Disney Princess. Who knows what the next transformation may bring...
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Sep 8, 2015 21:40
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