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 "What if customers expect us to start stocking such hideous furniture in our stores?" ask the agitated retailers.  When scavenging the Tall Houses of the Old Ones, few things bring a hunter-gatherer more excitement than finding a handful of Keurig K-cups. The grit inside is bitter to eat, but when mixed with hot water it makes for an invigorating beverage that fills the drinker with energy. K-cups can usually be found in small numbers at the former sites of hotels and motels, where they were distributed to individual rooms, or laid out in the group eating areas. In private homes, K-cups can be found in greater numbers, but much more infrequently.
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Sep 9, 2015 16:43
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 Sharp-eyed viewers will notice a ghostly tree stalks Kristoph and Elsa for much of the film. What does it portend? Find out in the sequel, Frozen II: the Rise of Olaf coming to theaters winter 2016!
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Sep 9, 2015 16:51
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 This man has greased up his rear end in a top hat with natural lubricants to the point that all his farts are virtually frictionless!
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Sep 9, 2015 17:10
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 Fan the cards out under your chin, smile, and say "I'd like to pay these off now" while giggling. It won't particularly help you with the payments, but looking cuter when you initiate the transaction will make it less awkward.  Pay off your debt with huge rubber-banded wads of cash, with consecutive serial numbers if possible. Slam it down on the table, in a briefcase or just gathered into your fist, without saying a word. Frequently glance nervously over your shoulder, and ask people if they hear sirens at random intervals. Everyone present will be intensely uncomfortable -- "on edge" if you will -- turning what would be a normal financial transaction into a brilliant piece of performance art.
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Sep 9, 2015 17:28
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Realtalk though it's kinda depressing how many of these are about supposedly easy ways to trick yourself out of debt 
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Sep 9, 2015 17:29
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loquacius posted:Realtalk though it's kinda depressing how many of these are about supposedly easy ways to trick yourself out of debt  it's re-victimization in a way, too, since usually the types of people most likely to get into debt are in that situation because they think life can be solved through a series of easy shortcuts.It's akin to "helping" compulsive gamblers overcome their addiction by selling luck charms to help them stay out of trouble.
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Sep 9, 2015 17:40
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Applewhite posted:
I bet you five dollars this luck charm doesn't work.
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Sep 9, 2015 18:19
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 Those aren't actually muscles. Those are women that he's surgically trapped under his skin. His new girlfriend, Becky, has been wondering about the muffled screams she hears when he holds her tight.
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Sep 9, 2015 18:27
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Stay safe fluency spirit
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Sep 9, 2015 19:27
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 Several home loans have paid off with a new type of counterfeit $100 bill that is almost undetectable to even the most sophisticated instruments. Banks are worried that a significant number of these bills have already entered circulation.
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Sep 9, 2015 19:31
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Eonwe posted:Stay safe fluency spirit
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Sep 9, 2015 20:27
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Sep 9, 2015 22:25
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 1.) Employ a group of struggling models to applaud your every decision.
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Sep 10, 2015 01:58
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 An autographed picture of Phil Collins in their pocket
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Sep 10, 2015 03:12
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 One that her classmates had seen coming for years. In a short time of several weeks, Brenda Goldfarb began to develop large patches of scales on her back and arms, and a row of small horns began to erupt from under her scalp. She began to complain to her mother of back pain, when she slowly began to arch back and move around on all fours. She was last seen on August 24th, when she sprouted large leathery wings from her shoulderblades, before flying off into the night from her parent's estate. A reward is being offered for her capture.
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Sep 10, 2015 04:14
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Bowlcutbarricade posted:lol if you use sites that have click bait articles. Just kill yourself. Heh Clickhole I dono, how about not spending beyond your means?
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Sep 10, 2015 06:06
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Eonwe posted:Stay safe fluency spirit Dammit beaten
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Sep 10, 2015 06:19
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Applewhite teach me to post
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Sep 10, 2015 06:21
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Lil Peeler posted:Applewhite teach me to post You must become one with the antelope
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Sep 10, 2015 06:22
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Alan Smithee posted:You must become one with the antelope This like in a mister hands way or a taco bell chihuahua way?
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Sep 10, 2015 06:24
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Lil Peeler posted:This like in a mister hands way or a taco bell chihuahua way? In a "lol, just lol, if you're not loving antelope while posting" kind of way
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Sep 10, 2015 10:10
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 French Dressing! Can you believe that?  Coffee is not "immune to potassium" and pure potassium will explode when dropped in coffee.  There's this new invention called the "broom." Maybe try it out sometime.  They have all these weird rectangles on the walls above the stairs.  They put their welcome mats on the inside and leave their door open during the day so the wind sweeps through and carries out all the dust.
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Sep 10, 2015 12:13
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 1. Start with "Hello?" 2. Ask how they are doing that day. 3. You might want to give your call sign if you are a ham radio operator. It's the polite thing to do. 4. Breath heavy, this will pique their interest. 5. Scream into the phone "Who is this!?" even though you were the one that called, you'll share a good laugh over it later. 6. Sternly say to them "Keep it down, I'm in the library for Pete's sake" FlimFlam Imam fucked around with this message at 12:26 on Sep 10, 2015 |
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Sep 10, 2015 12:23
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This woman's panties were visible only for a few milliseconds, but thanks to our high speed cameras, we were able to capture a near perfect upskirt shot.
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Sep 10, 2015 12:26
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A misanthrope posted:
Dead God Please make this happen amen
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Sep 10, 2015 12:31
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 Anyone who signs up to a life insurance policy from January 2016 will legally have a limit on how much cash they are allowed to get back, regardless of what they paid into the scheme! Under the Life Insurance Cash Regulations Act (2015) insurers will be able to limit payouts to the amount of physical cash you're able to carry out of their offices (dropping any cash means you lose it).
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Sep 10, 2015 14:49
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 Turns out air holes were needed afterall Edit:  I will pay you to consume my liquidised post history for a year freelop fucked around with this message at 15:15 on Sep 10, 2015 |
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Sep 10, 2015 14:52
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freelop posted:I will pay you to consume my liquidised post history for a year You might as well just straight up say you're paying people to kill themselves
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Sep 10, 2015 15:50
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 jerk ur dick off in the forest
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Sep 10, 2015 15:55
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 It's pooping. Movies don't show you sailors pooping.
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Sep 10, 2015 16:15
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Applewhite posted:
It is not true at all that coffee doesn't know how to party. Turn off the lights, crank some EDM or dubstep, and drop an E pill in that poo poo, and you will see that coffee can loving THROW DOWN.
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Sep 10, 2015 16:18
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 was tons of poo poo, because they'd walked into someone's old latrine.
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Sep 10, 2015 16:27
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 While I do enjoy masturbating tot he sound of Will Arnett's voice I also have a very low standard of brilliance
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Sep 10, 2015 19:45
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 "We list 11 extinct species that people used to eat." "California Power Companies literally fear large-chested ladies. They cause brownouts." "Your Last Name... is much less useful than a simple genetic test. But essentially everyone on earth is a descendant of some king or queen, if you go back far enough." "Fighting For Your Wallet ... and all of its contents. We list the 10 largest credit card companies, in order of market capitalization."
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Sep 11, 2015 01:15
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A misanthrope posted:
I rofled irl, literally.
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Sep 11, 2015 02:15
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criscodisco posted:
So we discovered the Jersey Devil is real finally.
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Sep 11, 2015 05:34
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 turns out this dino was just a giant walking dick!  Lucas quoted as screaming "eat fresh" as young boy watched in horror  don't let her squinty eyes fool you! she's actually real bad with electronics  keep hands at 9 and 3, NOT 10 and 2!!! press firmly on gas pedal while feathering brake to regulate speed AT ALL TIMES to save gas! drive on wrong side of the road in suburban neighborhoods steps 4 & 5 TBA  $150 Target gift card if you can guess her current TEMPERATURE! she's been in my freezer for 5+ hours...  alleged last words were "SMELLS like BUTT CUM!!!"
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Sep 11, 2015 11:48
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 Top of the list: Tomatoes that have been injected with cancer poison.
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Sep 11, 2015 11:59
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 "i make poo poo posts for a living!" dad gay, so what, Something Awful superstar exclaims  deaf gamer girl's last words after beating Super Mario Bros. 3 in 28:18, "gamefaqs spinoff luelinks 'eti'."  "i'm gay" lol  jews did 9/11
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Sep 11, 2015 12:02
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| # ? Apr 27, 2024 23:19 |
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 The crappy truck crumples like an origami crane.
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Sep 11, 2015 12:11
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