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Gonna have to throw in a vote, nay a demand, for the cloacaing device.
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Sep 16, 2015 17:57
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The motivational prod sounds like a good thing to bring along. We should also upgrade the harem with sex robots. 
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Sep 16, 2015 18:31
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John Lee posted:Gonna have to throw in a vote, nay a demand, for the cloacaing device. This the motivational prod and the matter modulator
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Sep 16, 2015 20:14
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The Coat of Many Colors is a very powerful item but I can't remember if we're allowed to pick it at the start.
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Sep 16, 2015 20:24
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I don't understand how you guys can consider a Caiman run without Donald Plover on the crew, preferably as a valet. What are we gonna do if we get hit with a Tooth Decay effect without a tiny bird on hand to clean our teeth? C'mon, people 
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Sep 16, 2015 20:30
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loquacius posted:I don't understand how you guys can consider a Caiman run without Donald Plover on the crew, preferably as a valet. What are we gonna do if we get hit with a Tooth Decay effect without a tiny bird on hand to clean our teeth? C'mon, people just name the sippy bird donald plover.
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Sep 16, 2015 20:55
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Update We won't get to take off just yet - I ran out of time while digging around in the cards and scanning tonight, sorry about that. We'll definitely be taking off tomorrow though. Here's the crew: Weapons:  Shields:  Sensors:  Engines:  Navigation:  Valet:  We now know about the captain, the ship and its crew. Here's our current adventure sheet which will give us most of the info we need:  We're trying to drag this ship and its ungrateful crew across a large stretch of galaxy. Helpfully there's a game map printed in the book, we start at the bottom just right of center:  The map isn't completely exhaustive but usually you'll be given options to jump to the sector(s) nearest to you in the general direction of travel. Aside from the names these sectors are uncharted - anything could be in them. Those little numbers you see on the right-hand side are the number of star days we have to get past that line before we get overtaken by whatever's chasing us. So we always have the choice to mess around some more in the system or travel slowly to save energy, but at the cost of time. Going down to planets, repairing damage or spinning the engines to generate power will all slow us down but will be unavoidable at least some of the time because the ship doesn't have the resources for a straight sprint. Even if we're a bit ahead of the pursuing aliens it's best not to take it too easy as the other races will reach certain points at a pre-determined time - get there too late and the zone might be stripped bare or trapped. The Nav officer is the one that affects travel speed. I'd also like to mention a bit about how this game works. It's a lot like the Sword of the Bastard Elf in that energy is often more important than anything else - your shields and hull are less likely to take a beating than the batteries, and if you run out of either ship's energy or captain's energy it's game over. Since weapons, shields, jumping and most other activities waste energy it's best to avoid combat if possible. Unlike Sword of the Bastard Elf though if you engage in space combat there's a good chance we'll wind up dead or crippled because it's a really lethal activity, especially in the advanced ruleset. Weapons, being computer-guided and firing munitions at the speed of light (or maybe faster) basically never miss, and if they bring the shields down they'll cut through the hull like a hot knife through butter. Tomorrow in the afternoon I'll finalise the item choices : so far it looks like the following is in the lead: Cloacaing Device (ship upgrade) Motivational Prod (personal item) Matter Modulators (crew weapons) but the other choices are still viable. After that's settled we'll start with the first choice tomorrow evening. I will refrain from dumping rules from now on and just mention them as they come up. I'll do my best to prevent or at least explain any bullshit deaths early on if there are issues, but you guys did fine with the Elf and I'm sure you'll manage here too.
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Sep 17, 2015 01:47
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how much space credits do we start with? It might be wise to hire a space pole guide.
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Sep 17, 2015 02:40
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Turn to page 132. Ironjaw needs to get his rear end to the bridge. A ship's crew is a team and he needs to be a team player. We're taking this ball all the way down the court and slam dunking it.
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Sep 17, 2015 02:50
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Also lol the dippy bird is a pterodactyl 
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Sep 17, 2015 02:52
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Applewhite posted:Also lol the dippy bird is a pterodactyl This is why we need a 2nd dippy bird.
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Sep 17, 2015 03:05
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I suspect ironjaw is dead and a hivemind of skinks or geckos impersonating him in a weekend at Bernies fashion.
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Sep 17, 2015 03:10
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On personal weapons: What is the Caiman version of the Space Katana? Something really impractical but important to the proud Fatgator culture? ThatAgag posted:I'm definitely for arming up. Decadent crocodile weapons that look like flintlocks but fire disintegrator beams or whatever. Fancy space saber for the captain. I like the space saber and flintlocks, but Disintegrator beams??? That's crazy. You can't eat a disintegrated corpse.
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Sep 17, 2015 03:12
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That's why we need a sexy and practical electro-jaw extender. Goof food, good fights, and our captain will look fine as hell wearing a jaw extender. Plus it'll make up for our unfortunate mandible devolution over the past however many millennia.
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Sep 17, 2015 04:12
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Blurry Gray Thing posted:On personal weapons: What is the Caiman version of the Space Katana? Something really impractical but important to the proud Fatgator culture? That Maybe we can both saber and flintlock in one by asking for the crew to be equipped with the Laser Bayou-nets. Edit: this way we save our personal slot for something else! Fellbat fucked around with this message at 07:55 on Sep 17, 2015 |
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Sep 17, 2015 04:15
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Al Borland posted:how much space credits do we start with? It might be wise to hire a space pole guide. The ship is a self-contained economy which can print its own money, but there's no galactic currency. Fellbat posted:Maybe we can both saber and flintlock in one by asking for the crew to be equipped with the Laser Bayou-nets. The Captain will also get any crew weapon but they're not as good as personal weapons in general (still way better than nothing). Peebla posted:That's why we need a sexy and practical electro-jaw extender. Goof food, good fights, and our captain will look fine as hell wearing a jaw extender. Plus it'll make up for our unfortunate mandible devolution over the past however many millennia. Yeah this is the Caiman katana, equal parts ridiculous, impractical and impressive to beta males.
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Sep 17, 2015 08:48
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Gilganixon posted:The ship is a self-contained economy which can print its own money, but there's no galactic currency. Well if we ever meet the space poles I hope we can barter with them. They are a fine race to get out of some tricky situations. Also I'm all for the caiman katana.
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Sep 17, 2015 09:27
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Peebla posted:That's why we need a sexy and practical electro-jaw extender. Goof food, good fights, and our captain will look fine as hell wearing a jaw extender. Plus it'll make up for our unfortunate mandible devolution over the past however many millennia. this was my idea right here. We should equip our captain with The Chompers just in case we get into any hand to hand fights. they're also useful for other things not related to chomping
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Sep 17, 2015 16:44
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Gilganixon posted:The ship is a self-contained economy which can print its own money, but there's no galactic currency. Eyegems are valuable no matter where you go.
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Sep 17, 2015 22:50
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If we're going to encounter 10' Space Poles we may also need a Polelarity Reverser.
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Sep 17, 2015 22:56
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Applewhite posted:Eyegems are valuable no matter where you go. True enough, but those you can't start with. I'm just scanning in the first page of the adventure now along with the cards we've more or less selected, so bear with me. For anyone who didn't live through Sword of the Bastard Elf, the update schedule is once per day to allow time for choices to be made and scanning to be done. Any faster and something or other breaks.
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Sep 17, 2015 23:01
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Update Items chosen. Flipping over a few of these:  we get:    Crocs fight with skill 5 at ranged or close combat unless otherwise specified so this brings that up to 6 (rising to a very respectable 9 if the ship is boarded). The captain uses his expertise plus ship bonuses. We don't get the benefits of both the weapons at close range though, just the highest bonus. I went with the Jaw rather than the prod because they sort of do the same thing but the jaw does it better. Cattle prodding crocs just annoys them anyway. Moving onwards, we begin!   Full disclosure : I bought this cheap from "Two-Fisted Steve", who you might remember from the last game. The reason he was selling it cheap was because he'd torn out all the parts with decisions on them and was selling them separately, the prick. I bought them but now I've got a baggie of torn up bits of paper and I can't afford both food and electricity anymore, so it'll take a while for me to find the pages to turn to, reattach them to the right pages and scan them in. (don't worry though, I'll pay for electricity to keep this game running). Two-Fisted Steve is a monster but where else can you buy these books these days? Anyway as usual I'm going to need to rely on those of you who remember how this book runs (or can guess) to let me know what the next move should be. Here's the map once again for reference, we're somewhere below the Haldus system on the Day 0 line: The date is 2047-254 and we have to be in that Nebula at the top of the map by 2047-304 at the latest or we've had it. What's our first command? Adventure sheet:  (and I'll keep the second post in this thread updated with items and crew cards, etc) Edit: vvvvvvvvv good point, the map's a bit hard to read. The box set has a colour version too which I probably should have scanned in earlier: 
Saint Isaias Boner fucked around with this message at 02:40 on Sep 19, 2015 |
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Sep 18, 2015 02:45
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Lets go to KRLOUS or whatever it is, I can't read the first 2 letters very clearly. Maybe we can warn them of the approaching armada then extort money from them for safe passage (a one way trip to our cargo hold). They aren't going to need that money anyway and we could use it.
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Sep 18, 2015 02:59
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it's HALDUS and I second that proposition. i say, dear captain, let us have a feast
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Sep 18, 2015 03:27
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Yeah, might as well hit the closest system and see if they've heard anything about the destruction of our planet, who might have done it, and what the three other empires are up to. Every once in a while these lesser planetary systems have some loot to be had - might even be able to pick up an item card or useful crew member looking to bail on the planet if we let them know about the pursuing armada that we might have accendentally lead directly to their front door. E: I can't remember if all four empires are running to the void at the same time, but I would rather stear at least approximately towards the human empire's likely escape path rather than have to gently caress with those goddamn disco brobots the entire game. Two Free Toppings fucked around with this message at 03:43 on Sep 18, 2015 |
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Sep 18, 2015 03:39
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None of the above. Execute the items on the Pre Jump Checklist appendix sheet that came with the book so you can identify and correct the reactor instability that would have destroyed us after three jumps regardless of whatever else we did. I know OP was probably planning to just run the game as if the checklist is automatically completed (it's a somewhat poorly conveyed rule) but I've been burned enough times by dick DMs to know it's better to be safe than sorry. Nothing is more irritating than making some good progress only to be told "if you didn't complete the pre jump checklist on your first turn, go to page such and such" and then being told your ship exploded from an easily preventable reactor malfunction. Applewhite fucked around with this message at 13:25 on Sep 18, 2015 |
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Sep 18, 2015 03:55
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Gridlocked posted:Lets go to KRLOUS huskarl_marx posted:it's HALDUS and I second that proposition i like agreeing with people lets go here
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Sep 18, 2015 04:05
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huskarl_marx posted:it's HALDUS and I second that proposition. i say, dear captain, let us have a feast Applewhite posted:None of the above. Execute the items on the Pre Jump Checklist appendix sheet that came with the book so you can identify and correct the reactor instability that would have destroyed us after three jumps regardless of whatever else we did. Let's have a feast while the few slave-lizards and maybe some lowest class Caimen do the second thing. We've a long journey ahead of us and the destruction of our home planet was a terrible blow. Make our Valet prepare the ship, while we do the important stuff and see to the crew's morale.
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Sep 18, 2015 04:27
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I doubt Skull cares (or cared?) much for videogames being the cantankerous sort, but I wonder if the guys from FTL played this as kids? Anyways I say run all the proper pre-jump sequences like Applewhite says. I've been burnt by shoddy workmanship and traps as well. That said, we should jump to HALDUS/KRLOUS after. Although I gotta say it seems like a bit of gamble: going to the closest planets might mean we have more time for stops, but more of a chance for them to catch up.
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Sep 18, 2015 04:30
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Also putting my chips in for pre jump then haldus
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Sep 18, 2015 04:36
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Officially rename HALDUS to KRLOUS
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Sep 18, 2015 04:59
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Runaktla posted:Also putting my chips in for pre jump then haldus Same
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Sep 18, 2015 05:23
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First Command: Everyone make a tribute.avi video to upload to the galactic net of the homeworld being destroyed. Encourage them by leading the way with a classic one to Crocco Hill music and sound effets. Gotta raise morale then of course port. KRLDUS Hogge Wild posted:If we're going to encounter 10' Space Poles we may also need a Polelarity Reverser. Thank you for the good laugh. ANd yes if we encounter 10' space poles we'll definitely need it. Al Borland fucked around with this message at 07:23 on Sep 18, 2015 |
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Sep 18, 2015 07:04
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E: double post. But I suspect that Hadlus or whatever is a trap by the president cause he doesnt want us around gently caress him lets go off and PARTAYYY.
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Sep 18, 2015 07:22
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Looks like we'll be going to KRLOUS after a pre-launch check/party! I'll check back in a couple hours and make it so. (suspecting the government of a scam is the first possible ending, so I'll scan that in too if I've got time tonight)
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Sep 18, 2015 12:33
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i think we should eventually make our way to the Forge. if memory serves, there's a hidden shipyard there with really cheap, good poo poo. then again we are playing as the crocs so the space radiation might cause some mutations
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Sep 18, 2015 13:56
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why has every loving nerd on this forum played this already - please ignore all the people who know what they are doing
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Sep 18, 2015 17:21
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Nation posted:why has every loving nerd on this forum played this already - please ignore all the people who know what they are doing It's been a really long time since most of us played it, I think. Plus it's got a lot of replay value. I think one of Two Fisted's guarantees was "You'll never have the same experience twice or your money back." It's impossible (or at least impractical even by spergy Goon standards) to plan for all possible permutations and a trick that might have made the game easier on one playthrough might lead down a dead end if you try it again. I only knew about the checklist thing because it was such a pet peeve of mine that the only place it says you're supposed to use the checklist is the checklist itself (until, of course, you die from not using it). An experienced player probably has about the same chance of success as a total noob.
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Sep 18, 2015 17:46
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I guess its best we don't lose on the third page or something - but don't stop us from dying horribly/hilariously/incompetently
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Sep 18, 2015 18:55
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Applewhite posted:It's been a really long time since most of us played it, I think. Plus it's got a lot of replay value. I think one of Two Fisted's guarantees was "You'll never have the same experience twice or your money back." Actually I think it was "You'll never have the same experience or your time back." But yeah, I loved TWo Fisted Adventures as a kid. I was a little too cheap to buy the real ones, but I'd stay up really late playing this. Interestingly enough, Void Racers was noted as the inspiration for FTL. Not the primary inspiration, but it's there.
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Sep 18, 2015 19:35
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